A Look Back: Rennillia Series - Prequel (10 page)

“It’s not okay for someone to put their hands on you,” he finally said.

Giving up with him, I hopped down off the tailgate and sarcastically griped, “It’s not? Well I sure wished I had met you sooner because then I would have known.”

“Wait,” he blurted before I turned around, threw his hoodie at him and fussed, “Who the hell do you think you are? I just met you and already you think you have the right to tell me how things should be! You think I like having to wear long sleeves or missing school? Do you honestly think that I don’t know how screwed up this is? Oh, but surely you bringing it up every five minutes, reminding me of what my life is really like, will make me feel better. I just wanted to hang out here with you, not feel bad about myself. Geez, why couldn’t you just drop it!”

He stood there for a few minutes before saying, “I don’t know why you would feel bad.”

On the verge of assaulting him, I snapped, “That’s right you don’t. You don’t know anything and it’s you that’s making me feel bad and nothing else.”

Giving me a shocked and confused look he said, “You forgot your sweater.”

With a loud exhale, I stomped back over to the tailgate to grab it.

Quickly grabbing my sweater off the tailgate of his truck, it caught on the corner. Without thinking I gave it a hard yank, tearing a big hole in in. Thinking ‘great’ I stood there staring at it. How was I supposed to go anywhere now? Glancing over, I saw Jackson hold his hoodie out to me. I stood there for a second before holding out my hand to take it. Pulling it back from my grasp, he shook his head and held it open. Gritting my teeth, I stepped closer sliding my arm into the sleeve. Once I had it on he reached down to zip it. Taking a step back, I grabbed the bottom and zipped it up myself. At first he seemed disappointed then smiling wide, he held up his hand. My hair thing was still wrapped around his finger. Thinking ‘damn it’ I knew I needed that too. I almost cracked a smile when Jackson held his middle finger up for me to take it back. I knew what he was doing but I refused to endure anymore questions or pitiful glances concerning my situation.

Jackson stood there smiling and waiting. With a light sigh, I stepped in front of him. Taking his hand, I started to unwrap my hair thing from around his finger. Curling his fingers around mine he pulled me a little closer. When I looked up at him he leaned in and kissed me. Pulling back he smiled wide and I couldn’t help smiling back.

“So are we good?” he asked.

Nodding with a sigh, I replied, “Yea, we're good.”

With a slight smirk he said, “We still have a few hours before school's out.”

Laughing a little, I said, “Okay,” before asking, “What did you have in mind?”

“We could get to know each other better,” Jackson suggested.

His tone implied he was after more than conversation.

Raising an eyebrow, I informed, “I’m not sleeping with you.”

Smiling wide, he said, “Good, 'cause I’m not tired.”

Before I had a chance to say anything else, he kissed me.

Pulling back, he asked, “You wanna sit?”

When I nodded, Jackson helped me back onto the tailgate. Sliding his arms under mine, he pulled me close, kissing me.

The longer we kissed the lower is his hands moved until they rested right around my hips. As his hands tugged me closer, the knot in my stomach grew. His polite persistence made me start to question how far I was willing to go. Then as I felt his hand slide under the hoodie, I had to pull away. Smiling at him, I scooted back and crossed my legs in front of myself on the tailgate. Making his little pouty face, he sighed before sitting down on the tailgate next to me.

“Are you scared?” he asked in a low tone.

Confused, I questioned, “Of what?”

Rolling his eyes at me, he laughed, “Sex.”

“No,” I blurted feeling a little embarrassed.

Appearing curious, he asked, “Are you waiting?”

Trying to think of a good way to answer, I admitted, “Waiting implies that I’m waiting for something. I’m not waiting for anything. I’m just not going to.”

“Not even when you’re married?” he questioned.

With a light sigh, I replied, “I’m not doing that either.”

“Ever?” he asked.

Shaking my head, I explained, “It just doesn’t seem that great. I mean why would you spend your whole time growing up waiting to be free and do what you want, to get married and then always have to obey them.”

Jackson stared at me baffled for a moment before saying, “I don’t think it’s supposed to be like that.”

“Oh really? Then how come obey is in marriage vows?” I asked.

With a frustrated sigh, he said, “Ok, I guess marriage isn’t for everyone but I still don’t understand your aversion to sex.”

Wondering why this was such a hard concept for him to grasp, I shared, “Ok, my mother got pregnant with me so she and my father got married. For all I know they were happy before that. They aren’t happy now though, in fact they are probably the most unhappy people ever and if they hadn’t had sex she wouldn’t have gotten pregnant and they wouldn’t be so miserable.”

“What’s your mom like?” he asked.

Shrugging, I replied, “She's not really like anything. She’s just kinda there.”

I could tell he was having a hard time understanding as he asked, “And your dad?”

“My father,” I corrected before answering, “Is…unpleasant to be around.”

Appearing slightly hesitant, Jackson imparted, “I see how you would feel the way you do but I think you should reconsider the sex part.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at him as I said, “I bet you do.”

When he blurted, “I’m being serious,” I laughed harder, saying, “So am I!”

Smiling, he asked, “Well, what about everything else?”

Tilting my head to the side, I gave him a questioning look.

Leaning in, he kissed me before asking, “What about messin’ around?”

“Nothing that leads to sex, Jackson,” I stated.

I started to get the feeling the issue was getting serious.

Staring back at him, I wondered how this was really going to work if we wanted different things. As much as I wanted for the issue of sex not to be an issue, it was pretty clear, it was. It was unfair of him to try and change my mind on the matter but in a way, I was doing the exact same thing to him.

“I like you,” I assured before saying, “But if this is going to be a problem, maybe its better if we just…”

Leaning in, he kissed me then slightly fidgeting, he asked, “Will you be my girlfriend?”

Caught off guard, that was the last thing I imagined him saying. Quietly nodding, I smiled.

I leaned in and kissed him before saying, “I really do like you.”

Smiling wide, he assured, “I really like you too,” then kissed me.

Feeling a little silly, I couldn’t stop thinking, I’m Jackson’s girlfriend.

Later in the afternoon, it was time for school to get out. We headed to his parent’s house. Quickly realizing he was serious when he said he didn’t live far from the little wooded area, we were there in five minutes. I started to feel nervous but when we walked in his mom was so welcoming, I felt right at home. Her hair was strawberry blond and she kept it pulled back into a long ponytail. When Jackson introduced me, she seemed all excited that my name was Ren until I explained it wasn’t like the bird, it was short for Rennillia. She then made my day by saying I must be special because Jackson had never brought a girl home before. Not only did that make me feel good but Jackson’s face turned bright red and he even started to twitch a little from the embarrassment.

Jackson’s dad arrived home after work and we sat at the table for dinner. He was slightly taller than Jackson and a little slimmer too. Aside from that, they looked very much alike, right down to their blond hair and smile. It was so nice having dinner with The Thomas’. The three of them all kind of picked on each other but in a very endearing way. It was especially cute, that they all had little nicknames for each other. Mr. Thomas was JP short for Jackson Pierce, Mrs. Thomas was Suz short for Susan, and Jackson was Jacks. Being around them was so different than anything I had ever experienced. I could tell, not only were they a loving family, they genuinely liked each other. When it was time for Jackson to take me home, both his parents hugged me and said they hoped to see me again real soon.

On the way home, I started to wish I could have stayed longer. They were all smiles and laughs and I knew that’s where Jackson got his personality from. Taking the opportunity to stop every chance he got, to kiss me, on the way to my house, Jackson caused a smile to be a permanent fixture on my face the whole way.

When we pulled up in front of my house, Jackson offered to walk me in. When I declined, explaining it would be better not to, he seemed disappointed but understanding. After quickly kissing his cheek, I hopped out of his truck and strolled to my door. Looking back every few steps to see Jackson still there waiting to make sure I made it in safely.

To my surprise, my father was waiting and he opened the door before I had the chance. My father glared at me first then at Jackson’s truck. Swallowing hard I thought, please just let me inside, I don’t care what happens after, just not out here in front of Jackson.

“Why are you wearing that again?” my father snapped.

A little relieved there was a reasonable explanation, I replied, “I accidentally tore my sweater today so I borrowed it.”

“From him?” he asked pointing toward the truck.

As I nodded, he growled, “Give it back, now.”

Standing there wide eyed, I shook my head.

I heard Jackson’s truck door slowly open before I said, “I just have a little undershirt on.”

“Give it back or I will,” he demanded, starting to raise his voice.

I breathed a weak, “Yes sir,” before turning and walking back to Jackson’s truck.

Thinking this couldn’t be more humiliating, I walked around to the driver’s side.

Glancing at my father still in the doorway, I said, “I have to give your jacket back.”

Stepping out of his truck, Jackson offered, “I’ll go introduce myself, I’m sure…” before I stopped him, saying, “Please don’t do that.”

“Do you want your books?” he asked.

Shaking my head, I whispered, “I’m sorry,” as I unzipped his hoodie.

I pulled it off and handed it to him.

Taking it from me, he held the side if my hand under his hoodie whispering, “Get back in and we’ll go back to my house.”

I shook my head and cringed, hearing my father shout, “Rennillia!”

I watched Jackson’s eyes look me over as he pleaded, “I don’t wanna leave you here.”

With a slight shrug I could feel tears welling up in my eyes as I turned and walked away.

Hearing Jackson’s door close, I waited for the sound of him leaving as I walked back to my father. It wasn’t until I was inside and the door was shut that I heard his truck drive away. I had only made it as far as the kitchen before my father grabbed my arm.

Pulling me around to face him, he growled, “Now he sees what you really are.”

Not having a thing to say to my father, I gave him a dead stare. It appeared as though he was going to say something, then after looking me over, let go of my arm and walked away. I heard his door slam shut and my mother’s open.

Walking up to me, she appeared distressed as she questioned, “Were you at the hospital?”

Shaking my head, I replied, “No ma’am.”

I watched her swallow hard before she informed, “When Scott got home from school he found Abigail…she took a bunch of pills…”

Standing there, I started to cry. I reached out to her and she shrugged me away before heading back to her room. No wonder my father was waiting at the door, he thought I was with Hert.

In my room, I quickly showered and put my pajamas on. Climbing into bed, I could only think of Hert. While I was laughing and having dinner with the Thomas’, he was at the hospital with his mother waiting to see if she would make it or not. As I curled up in my comforter, I wished there was something I could do for him. Tossing and turning, I wanted to go see him. Finally, I decided if he was at the hospital with his mother, he would be okay until the morning.

Chapter 15

I couldn’t wait to leave the house. Not as much to see Jackson today but to find out how Hert was. My Father was awake and at the table. His expression was difficult to make out. When I walked past him, he turned his head in the opposite direction, refusing to look at me. I remembered hearing him yelling in the middle of the night but instead of getting up, I pulled the covers over my head and went back to sleep. Maybe my mother had finally had enough of him and told him off. My pleasant thought was quickly dispelled when he glared at me.

Narrowing his eyes, he snapped, “I bet you think you’re something, don’t you?”

Confused, I shook my head asking, “Sir?”

“Go ahead, whore around with whoever you want,” he growled before imparting, “When you wake up on somebody’s floor, it’s your own fault.”

I couldn’t help making a face as I asked, “Sir?” completely baffled.

On his feet, he reached to grab my face then hesitated, yelling, “You will still abide by my rules,” pointing his finger in my face.

“Yes sir,” I replied, still utterly confused.

Taking the opportunity to glare at me one more time, he sat back down when there was a knock at the door.

Turning towards the door, I rolled my eyes thinking my father may have finally lost it. It would be wonderful to think after years of him trying to break me, I finally broke him instead. However, I already knew that wasn’t the case so I just went with my ‘he’s lost his mind’ theory and opened the door.

Emerson was standing there with a smile as he asked, “Ready?”

Nodding, I rushed out the door, closing it behind myself before asking, “Have you heard from Hert?”

Shaking his head, he replied, “No, but I think he is alright. My father went to the hospital when he found out, to check on him. Hert spent the night at the hospital and my father went back this morning. He said he would be at school today.”

Nodding as Em opened the door for me, I slid in the passenger seat, breathing a sigh of relief.

Happy someone with the ability to help was looking out for Hert, I said, “That’s really nice of your father to do that.”

With a quick nod Emerson drove toward the school sharing, “He likes Hert.”

I couldn’t help myself as I chirped, “Well who doesn’t,” with a smirk.

With a laugh he said, “You mean outside of this car?” and we both laughed.

As our laughter subsided, he asked, “Speaking of people liking people, how are you and Jackson?”

I couldn’t help but smile as I answered, “He asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes.”

Slightly smiling, he said, “Awe you’re in love.”

Making a face, I corrected, “I wouldn’t say that but I do like him a whole lot.”

With an um-hum, Emerson pulled into the school parking lot.

Scanning the parking lot, I looked for Hert. With no sign of him, I smiled wide when I saw Jackson waiting for me. When Emerson parked, I hopped out of his car and walked up to Jackson. The closer I got, the more I could tell he had an unsettled look on his face. Hoping that my father wasn’t right about him seeing what I really was, I felt a little nervous.

I could feel myself starting to frown as I stepped in front of him saying, “Hey.”

Jackson’s expression didn’t change as he repeated, “Hey.”

Trying to get him to smile, I asked, “Do you have class today or did you make a special trip again?”

“I have class,” he answered, before asking, “Are you okay?”

Rolling my eyes, I insisted, “Yes. It was embarrassing but…” before he stopped me saying, “I wasn’t trying to embarrass you or make you feel bad, I just didn’t know what else to do.”

Giving him a strange look, I assured, “You didn’t.”

“I was so worried leaving you there and…” he started before I cut him off saying, “Hold that thought, but I’m ok, really,” as I saw Hert pull up.

The second Hert parked, I darted off to talk to him.

Making my way over, I thought about hugging him. Then as I got closer, I decided against it. Trying to get him to look me in the eye, I moved my head around until he stared at me.

“How are you?” I softly asked.

Nodding, he replied, “I’m alright.”

With a heavy sigh, I apologized, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t find out ‘til I made it home last night.”

Hert’s jaw flexed as he repeated, “I’m alright.”

I nodded and said, “Ok, I just wanted to make sure.”

As I started to walk off, he asked, “I guess you’re going to be okay now?”

Quickly turning around, I said, “Uh, sure.”

Giving me a confused expression, he started to say, “I heard…” then shook his head saying, “They’re committing her,”

My heart instantly sank as I said, “Oh no, why?”

“She’s sick,” he replied.

Worried I asked, “What are you going to do?”

Shrugging, he answered, “Mr. Roberts offered for me to stay with them but my mother has some money in her account and since I’ve been handling the bills since she went in the first time…I need to get a job and then maybe just sell the house and get an apartment.”

Shaking my head at him, I asked, “Why wouldn’t you just stay with Emerson.”

“They were going to send my mother to a state institute until Mr. Roberts stepped in. He made sure they didn’t. That’s already too much,” he explained.

I offered, “Is there anything I can do?”

With a slight smile, Hert said, “Yea, you can go back over there to your boyfriend before I have to kick his ass for glaring at me.”

Starting to smile, I nodded and walked back to Jackson.

Emerson and Jackson were standing fairly close and it was hard to tell if they were arguing or being secretive. When I made it right beside them, they were both quiet.

Emerson looked at Jackson and gave him a disappointed expression before turning to me and saying, “See you after school.”

Nodding, I tried to smile then I looked at Jackson. Thinking he must have decided to break up with me, I figured I’d help him out.

“Is there something you wanna say to me?” I asked.

Taking a deep breath, he said, “You’re upset.”

Rolling my eyes, I lied, “No. If you wanna breakup, you wanna break up.”

“You wanna break up?” he asked with a serious expression.

Narrowing my eyes at him, I snapped, “Has everybody lost their mind today?”

Looking at me like I was the crazy one, he said, “I don’t want to break up,” then pulled me close and kissed me.

His kiss was slow and incredibly inappropriate for the school parking lot.

“Okay,” I breathed before asking, “Why do you look like something’s wrong?”

Appearing guilty, he said, “Last night.”

Tilting my head to the side, I consoled him, saying, “Nothing happened after you left. He just said now you could see what I was really like but you already had seen it so…and then I went to bed.”

Leaning against his truck Jackson pulled me close to him. Hugging me tight, he quickly kissed my cheek. After that, his smile was back and I was happy.

Unfortunately, the bell rang and it was time for class. Jackson and I had different lunches so I wouldn’t see him until the end of the day. Sliding into my desk, in first period, I noticed the two girls next to me were whispering.

Normally, I wouldn’t have cared but then one of them said, “Shhh, she’s friends with him.”

Listening intently now, I heard the other one say, “So. She’s with Jackson now,” before continuing to say, “So anyway, my mom’s cousin was in there and she told my mom, Scott’s mother flipped out and tried to stab the other nurse with the…”

Finding their conversation unbearable, I turned and snapped, “You need to shut your mouth.”

With a smug glare, she said, “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t think you would care. After all, everyone saw you in the parking lot with Jackson this morning.”

Giving her a dirty look, I asked, “Excuse me?” as her friend turned and faced the front of the class.

Then with a snotty little grin, she said, “But I suppose you do owe him. All that practice got you Jackson.”

Smiling back, I assured, “Or maybe not putting out on the first date, like some people…” before the teacher fussed, “Stand up.”

Facing forward, I realized, Mrs. Burnum was staring right at me. Thinking, ‘shoot’, I stood up.

Irritated, Mrs. Burnum stated, “By all means share.”

Smiling politely, I announced, “Yes ma’am, I was just explaining to Lucy here, the benefits of abstinence while dating in high school.”

With a heavy sigh Mrs. Burnum fussed, “That’s enough Rennillia, and you know her name is Brendy.”

Making a face, I questioned, “Really? Are you sure?” glancing at Brendy, I tilted my head and added, “Everyone I know calls her Lucy.”

As Brendy started to cry, Mrs. Burnum snapped, “That’s it! Out! Get your things and go outside the room until class is over!”

With a little sigh, I slid my books off my desk saying, “Yes ma’am.”

I smiled to myself walking out of the classroom and into the hallway.

Standing outside of the classroom, I leaned my back against the wall hugging my books to my chest. Wondering if what Brendy said was true, I thought, true or not she had no business talking about Mrs. Herterand like that. I had to mentally thank Hert for my little display in class. If there was anything I had learned from growing up with him, it was how to make someone feel bad. Sighing with pride, that I got the best of that snotty girl, I saw Emerson walking down the hall.

Smiling with a curious look, Emerson hugged me and quietly asked, “What are you doing out here.”

Rolling my eyes, I replied, “I made Brendy Willers cry in class.”

“You made her cry?” he questioned with surprise.

Nodding, I stated, “She was talking mess about Hert’s mother so I called her Lucy in front of the whole class.”

Visibly trying not to laugh out loud, Em threw his hand in front of his mouth, making a little snorting sound.

Still quite proud of myself, I smirked asking, “What are you doing out here?”

“My father called for me to come home,” he answered.

“Is everything okay?” I blurted.

Nodding, he said, “I think so, I will be back to get you after school.”

I nodded and he hugged me again before leaving.

My next few classes seemed to drag on and on. I was happy when lunch rolled around and I could see Hert. Standing beside Hert in the cafeteria line, I waited for him to get his tray. I looked up at him as he made an irritated noise.

Feeling someone behind me, I heard a voice ask, “Come here often?”

Smiling, I felt Jackson’s arms slide under mine holding my back tight against him as I replied, “Five days a week, from September to May.”

“You’re not eating?” he asked, before quickly offering, “You want me to buy you lunch?”

Laughing, I tilted my head to look at him sharing, “I haven’t eaten lunch at school since the seventh grade.”

Letting go, just enough to stand at my side with his arm around me, Jackson looked at Hert, saying, “I’m sorry about your mom. I hope she gets better real soon.”

At first Hert narrowed his eyes then his expression relaxed as he said, “Thanks.”

Smiling to myself, I thought that was really nice, of both of them.

Jackson quickly kissed my cheek before he whispered, “I missed you.”

Rolling my eyes and shaking my head at him, I smiled, fussing, “Go to class before you get in trouble.”

Then there was another voice behind us booming, “Hands off the female students, Jackson!”

The three of us turned around.

I wasn’t as surprised by Coach Caffrey fussing at him as I was when Jackson grabbed me tighter, saying, “I just can’t help myself.”

Then Coach Caffrey laughed, “Boy get your butt to class!”

“Yea, yea,” Jackson fluffed before asking, “Do you still need me after school?”

Nodding, Coach Caffrey replied, “For about an hour.”

Jackson nodded then kissed my cheek again before jogging off to class.

I stood there staring at Coach Caffrey not knowing what to say. Cleary he knew Jackson and was just messing with him. Now I was left standing in front of him with my face turning red.

“You must be Ren,” he greeted.

Still at a loss for words, I blurted, “And you’re Coach Caffrey.”

Laughing at me, he shared, “I’m Carenza’s cousin.” As I shook my head not knowing who that was, he said, “Susan…Mrs. Thomas…”

“Oh, it’s nice to meet you,” I replied.

As I looked at him, I noticed he looked an awful lot like Gus minus the beard.

With another laugh, Coach Caffrey assured, “It was nice to meet you too…and you make Jacks behave himself.”

Nodding, I smiled and watched him walk away.

Finally getting out of the lunch line, Hert and I found two seats in the corner. Watching him eat, I picked at the green beans he had at the edge of his tray.

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