After the Hurt (10 page)

“Pepper, it's me.”

She opened it and he secured it, then turned to her. She looked worn and just as tired as he was. She was probably jet-lagged and could use a good night's rest, if not more than one night. There were only a few hours left to get some sleep and he'd make sure she got the most of it. His sleepy brain wasn't working as astutely as it should have and the first thing that popped out of his mouth may not have been the right thing to ease her tension.

“So, now what do you want to do for some excitement?”

Tank was relieved when she burst out laughing. He was glad to see the apprehension run away from her face.

“That was pretty freaky, you know. In all my travels, I've never had that happen. Yet here at home, it does.”

Why did he like the sound of her saying “home” so much? He shouldn't, but it sure felt good hearing it roll off her tongue.

“I don't know, but I'm relieved nothing really bad happened.”

“Me too.”

“You should get into bed. Try to rest.”

“What about you?” She looked up at him and he almost gave in to the invitation he swore he saw reflecting in her gaze.

“Couch.” He pointed to the overstuffed one in front of the fireplace. “It's comfy and I want to be where I can see the whole loft.”

Was that disappointment he saw in her eyes? Did it matter if she was disappointed? How did he feel about the invitation he thought she was silently extending?

“Okay. If you think so.” Pepper stepped forward. As if an invisible magnetic field drew them, Tank couldn't move away. He enveloped her in a hug when she wrapped her arms around his waist. “Thank you.”

“For what?” He was so distracted by the soft press of her breasts against his chest and the spicy cinnamon scent coming from her silky flesh and hair, he couldn't think straight.

“For being here.” She stepped back from him and rose on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

All he had to do was turn his head slightly and he would've captured the pink plumpness of her lips. But he didn't. By the time he'd gathered his wits it was too late and she'd walked away. Stopping in the bedroom doorway, she turned to him. He'd never felt more gut punched by her beauty than he did at that moment.

“I'll be right in here.” She opened the door wide and disappeared into the dimly lit room. He heard the rustle of the satiny Egyptian sheets he knew would be on that bed, and her slipping between them. Had she taken off her pajamas or did she keep them on?

Something you won't know the answer to, buddy,
Tank told himself. He pulled a thick, colorful blanket from the wicker chest and flopped onto the couch. He stared at the ceiling, fighting to keep his eyes open. He was here to stand guard for her, not sleep. But as he drifted off, his last thought was Pepper sleeping in the big bed in the room right beside him.

He woke with a start a while later and bolted up. Had he heard something? Looking around the dark room, he relaxed and settled down. It was just the wind whistling past the windows. Man, what he wouldn't give for some sun and surf. Tank swung his legs around and his feet hit the floor, glad for his slippers. He cocked his head and listened to the building sounds. Nothing was out of the ordinary. He knew every creak and groan of this old place now. All was well. He yawned and stood.

He had a promise to keep and that kept him from going to the bedroom door. Tank fidgeted and wished he'd brought something to read. He stood in front of the window and watched the blizzard rip down the street. Fucking snow. Unable to stop himself, Tank turned and looked at the bedroom door. He found it extremely difficult to stay away. But he should check on her, right? So he walked over and stood in the doorway. Not stepping over the threshold, as if it were the forbidden zone on the other side. Pepper slept like the dead. He watched her, barely able to see her in the dark all cuddled down in the blankets. Her deep, even breathing filled him with calm. She was resting. That was good and he was glad.

She was back under his roof, under his care, and goddamn it, that's where he'd wanted her all along. It took her coming home for him to accept it. But why did she have to go and screw things up by taking off in the first place? He shifted on his feet and decided to lie down again, but he couldn't tear his eyes off her.

Finally, he was unable to stand it any longer. Tank silently moved to the side of the bed. Light reflecting off the snow outside filtered through the window, casting a silvery glow onto the bed and her. Pepper's beauty never failed to take his breath away, and in sleep, she was angelic.

He smiled at that. Pepper, an angel? Maybe a tempting fallen one. Her devilish nature enticed him as a teen and then as an adult. They'd grown up together, experiencing pretty much everything that came their way by each other's sides. Her adventurousness matched his own. Then she left him and, unable to properly deal with her rejection, he'd stoked his anger, carefully harboring a grudge against her. She'd hurt him bad. Made him feel like a failure. Why couldn't she trust him enough during a time in her life when she'd needed him most? Her rejection had cut deep and hardened him. If she could leave him after all they'd been through and the time they'd been together, how could he ever put himself out there again and risk someone else doing the same? Watching her now gave him a little bit of hope.

He thought back to the intruder. What the hell else was going to happen? Just when he thought he'd had it all together, shit comes flying from all directions. He couldn't deny the excitement, though. It gave him pure adrenaline. A rush that was a clear indicator he'd been bored. Until Pepper came back. He missed fighting too. Damn the knee! Having already performed one surgery on Tank's ACL, the doctor felt it was far too risky to do a second. The only saving grace was that Pepper had made him invest wisely. He'd never been one to think too far into the future; he was glad she had.

He'd been floating through his days, simply checking the boxes since she'd left. Not living life to the fullest. Which was, or rather, had been his motto. Grab life by the balls and don't let go. Yet he'd let go when Pepper had gone. It took her coming back for him to sit up and take notice that aside from running the business, he'd been dead inside.

Pepper rolled over with a soft sigh that sent his blood racing. Only she and fighting could get him revved up. It was her sound of sex, her pleasure moans, that shot right to his cock. He hadn't forgotten them. How could he? Even if he did repress the memory. Tank wondered what she was dreaming about. Him?

The sheet slipped down, exposing her curved shoulder and the swell of her breast under the clingy top. Her eyelashes fluttered and her lips moved as if she were mouthing words. She used to talk in her sleep. Sometimes her words were understandable and other times, gibberish. Most times she didn't remember what she'd said in the morning. He'd caught her sleep walking a couple times too. Which frightened the hell out of him because who would have been there for her when she was away? Had she been alone?

She murmured unintelligible words. Tank didn't move and held his breath, not wanting to wake her. Suddenly he felt awkward, like a voyeur, and if she woke to find him staring at her that wouldn't be cool.

He let his gaze linger on her sleeping form for a second longer before turning away. He backed up and was nearly out the door when the floor creaked. He paused and swore softly.

Pepper's sleepy voice halted him. “Tank?”

He looked at her over his shoulder. “Sorry, didn't mean to wake you.”

“S'okay. What'cha doing?”

“Just checking on you.”

“Mmm, 'kay.”

She rolled over to face him. With her sleepy eyes and mussed-up hair, well, he'd never seen anything so damn sexy. Tank gritted his teeth, longing to fist his fingers into the silky length and hold her tight. The soft light made her lips shine and he ached to kiss them until they were bruised with passion. He had to hear her pleasure moans again. More important, he wanted to be the one responsible for them.

She raised her hand and wiggled her fingers at him. “C'mere.”

He didn't need to be asked twice. Tank was by the bed in two steps. He took her hand and closed his eyes for the briefest moment when the heat of her flesh lit him up like he'd just stepped outside into the sun. He melted into her touch and ignited to a full burn.

“Sit,” she told him.

The king-size bed moved slightly as he perched on the edge of the mattress. Any closer and he might lose his tightly reined-in restraint. She rolled a little closer to his thigh. He watched her eyelids flutter a couple of times before they slowly closed as she struggled to stay awake.

“Sleep; you're exhausted.” He raised his hand and smoothed her hair off her face. Thick and silky, the tendrils flowed through his fingers. His stomach muscles tightened and he curled his fingers into a fist, holding her hair as if to never let it—or her—go again. Then he dropped her hair, not liking his growing weakness where she was concerned.

“Stay with me,” she murmured in a drowsy voice. Did she know how sultry she sounded? It made him want her more than was good for him. A fierce protectiveness mixed with his arousal and confusion over his chaotic emotions was becoming almost too exhausting to fight. Tank curled his toes into the plush carpet. Her arm draped over his lap and she rested her head on his thigh, mere inches from his totally alert penis. Tank bit back a groan.

“I will. Sleep,” he whispered.

“Mmm…lie down with me.”

The urge to hold her in his arms was too great to resist. Just for a few moments he'd do as she asked. She likely wouldn't remember in the morning and jeopardize his resolve to find out exactly why she'd come home. For the money or…Tomorrow. Tonight he'd hold her.

Tank slowly moved until he was stretched out beside her. She snuggled into his side and he put his arm around her, cuddling her close. Pepper's breath warmed his chest and she draped a leg over his thigh like she used to do. The groan he'd been holding escaped.
Just for a few minutes,
he told himself,
I'll stay and then go back to the safety of the couch.
She seemed to fall back asleep and he relaxed with her in his arms.

“You feel good.” Pepper's sleepy voice was muffled against him, but there was no mistaking the husky tone. If she'd been having sexy dreams, likely she was still feeling the passion, which meant he had to be extra cautious. Sure enough, moments later she rolled over and straddled him. Tank nearly exploded out of his skin when her heat seared him through their clothes.

She leaned over him, her hands on either side of his head. Her hair fell around them like a curtain, her familiar and exotic scent a sudden reminder of what he'd been missing. Pepper's lips, soft and warm, pressed against his neck. His pulse leapt into overdrive. Slowly, she pumped her hips, her pussy rubbing over his cock with delicious friction that he'd sorely missed. She moaned sweetly, deeply, and he was hard pressed not to respond to her.

Tank itched to rip off her shorts and top, flip her under him, and bury his cock in her heat. The need to lay his hands on her and feel her bare flesh next to his was so overpowering he thought his heart might pump him into an early stroke. It took all he had to restrain himself. How far would she go? How far would he let her go? It was getting harder to ignore her and he knew he needed to put a stop to it before it got too far out of control. His gut told him to push her away, but he didn't have the willpower. And knowing she'd likely not remember in the morning unless she fully woke up now, it was wrong to not—

“Ahh.” The groan erupted from him when Pepper arched her back and tipped her hips, clenching her thighs tight to his hips. He couldn't look away from her breasts as they strained the thin fabric of her top. His hands had a will of their own. He couldn't, didn't, want to stop them from sliding up her thighs to rest in the curve of her waist. Her skin was so silky and warm, so familiar, yet it seemed forever since he'd felt her. He slipped his fingertips under the hem of her top. Pepper shivered when he touched her bare flesh. He watched with delighted awe when her nipples hardened against the fabric.

Tank murmured, “Like I said last night, you're a responsive witch.” This time calling her that wasn't so much an insult as an endearment.

He gripped her waist firmly and pushed her down on him. Hard. Pepper's breath was ragged. Tank groaned. Trying to resist the draw of her breasts, he tightened his hold on her waist. He hadn't forgotten how perfectly they fit in his palms or how the stiffened peaks grew larger under the sweep of his thumbs, but that was a memory and he wasn't to touch her breasts now. No matter how much he wanted to. Tank licked his lips, so tempted to pull a hardened nipple between his lips and suckle it. He tightened his hold again in order resist the urge to reach for her tits. It took everything he had to lift her off of him. She was light, easy to move, and he gently laid her beside him on the rumpled sheets.

He swung his legs over the side and stood. Looking down at her, he admitted that he loved how she lay in a rumpled, sexy heap on the bed. She looked good enough to eat, and how he loved to do that to her as well. Tank took a step back and drew in a deep breath.

She snuggled into the sheets and her breathing evened out as she fell back asleep. Normally she was a wildcat when it came to interrupted sex. Once she got going she didn't want to stop. The fact she wasn't contrary right now confirmed she'd been asleep and dreaming. He ran his hand over his head and fixed the front of his pants with the other. His erection throbbed painfully. He wanted her full awake when they made love.

Made love?

Tank had been so damn sure that would never happen again and now, here he was, planning something he'd been determined to avoid. He pulled the covers over her and tucked them in.