Allie's War Season Three (80 page)

I remembered at one point he said, "We both knew this would happen. We saw it..."

And I know I said back, "So we know it'll be all right. That it'll all work out all right..."

I couldn't remember what we were talking about, though.

Even without so much as a whisper of specifics, something about the memory brought a pain to my heart...even now, hours later and with no real context whatsoever. Not quite sadness, but something else. One of those profusions of emotion that doesn't want to settle on any one thing. Whatever that feeling was, it made me forget about going back to sleep.

Gripping his arm, I fought to turn around, but my body felt like it was made of sand, shifting and impossible to control. Realizing what I was doing, Revik tried to help me. It wasn't until then that I realized we were on the floor, lying in front of the still-lit, gas fireplace. A blanket was more strangling us than really over us, and I'd wrapped part of the rug around my legs too, probably because I'd gotten cold at some point in the early hours of the morning.

Revik released me long enough to pull me around to face him. Then he was kissing me, before I could get my breath, gripping my shoulders in his hands as he rolled his weight more on top of mine. As soon as he started opening his light, I pretty much forgot everything else. I wondered if we'd ever actually managed to complete a single one of the sex acts we'd started the night before...then figured I probably would have remembered, if we had.

Given how I felt right then, even with how tired I was, I had my doubts.

I was tugging at his hair then, pulling at his clothes, which I realized he still wore, at least in part. Meaning his jacket had mysteriously disappeared, along with his shoes and socks, and his pants didn't seem to be fastened right, and his tux shirt was off by a few buttons in either direction, but he wasn't anywhere close to naked either. I grappled to get the rest of it off him, and he groaned against my mouth, fighting to unzip my dress and unhook my bra at the same time even as he rolled over to lay his back to the carpet, bringing me on top of him.

It occurred to me we might still be borderline stoned even as he gave up on my clothes with his fingers, pushing up my dress instead and caressing my lower body...well enough and thoroughly enough that I realized I wore absolutely nothing under the dress at that point, at least from the waist down. His pain spiraled out at me as I thought it, hitting me hard enough and insistently enough that I couldn't help but let out a startled cry.

It occurred to me that I didn't remember feeling that much the night before, either. Pain, I mean. That somehow had entirely vanished the night before.

So we had to be sobering up a little.

"Take it off," he said, his voice gruff as he pushed the fabric up to my waist. "Take it off before I rip it off you, Allie...I've probably already half-ruined it..."

I fought to comply, but my limbs still seemed to be trapped in some kind of gelatinous substance, and I could barely sit up well enough to reach for the hooks behind my back. Between us, we finally loosened the dress and got the bulk of the fabric over my head. I was still fumbling with the strapless bra as he went to work on his shirt and pants from where he lay on his back. He'd lost his underwear at some point in the evening too. How he'd done that without losing his pants was a little beyond me.

"We went swimming," he said, his voice gruff still, as he looked up at me. He laughed at my expression. "...Don't you remember?"

I shook my head, bewildered. "We did? Why?"

He laughed again. "You wanted to. You insisted, in fact...you took me up to the pool on the roof. You really don't remember? You invited everyone to come with us. The whole wedding party...half the staff of the hotel." He laughed at the memory, still working at the buttons on his shirt, his fingers clumsy. "We ended up swimming in our underwear with your aunt and most of Wreg's crew and your cousins and half of those jokers from the Seven and Adhipan..." He glanced up, still struggling with one of the buttons. "...even Balidor went in. Your uncle and a few others just looked at the stars. I saw that cousin of yours, Marcus, playing footsie with Oli at the edge of the pool, but he never got in..."

"Balidor went in? Really?" I continued to stare at him, half-convinced he was pulling my leg. "Where was Jon?"

Revik's eyes shifted sideways, but a small smile touched his mouth. I felt the shimmer of discomfort on him too, and shoved at his arm, albeit weakly.

"Revik?" I prompted. "Where was he?"

Revik shrugged half in apology with one hand. "He and Wreg were making out on a lounge chair for most of it..." He hesitated at my startled laugh. "...I think we were affecting the group, actually. Tarsi mentioned something about that, when she was working on the cakes, that they all tied to ours. Things got a little...friendly...after you and I ate ours. Your aunt was kissing Loki for part of the night..."

"What?" I said, staring at him again. "Seriously?"

Revik shrugged, still smiling. "...I think I saw Holo and Yumi kissing in the pool, too, and your cousin Kara had Jax all over her pretty much as soon as the dancing started. Balidor and Yarli disappeared together not long after we all left the roof..." At what must have been a puzzled look from me, he gestured towards his own face. "You know. The one who worked for Ullysa. Dark skin...braids. She looks a bit like Chandre, but more African than Indian..."

"I know who Yarli is," I said, surprise still in my voice. "I guess I'm just in shock."

Revik laughed. "He looked pretty happy, actually. They'd been hitting it off well since she got into town. She arrived a few weeks early to visit friends and was considering moving to the hotel anyway, since the west coast is getting pretty dicey right now for seers. Balidor had been going out to keep her and Ullysa company...and probably trying to talk them into New York." Smiling faintly again, he shrugged. "...A few of us might have suggested strongly that Balidor take charge of hospitality for some of the out-of-towners..."

I laughed, smacking his arm. "Jeez. You guys set him up..."

Revik shrugged, smiling a little. "I thought it would be Ullysa, honestly. But in a way, Yarli makes more sense. She's older...they have more in common. And Balidor really likes her. Or at the very least, he's really attracted to her..." At my raised eyebrow, Revik gestured with a hand. "We've been teasing him about it for days. He gets all flushed and starts shielding his light whenever she's around, so we all figured he'd developed a crush..." Hesitating, he gave me another cautious look. "...And you must have picked up on that with Wreg. I mean, how he was acting around Jon..."

I nodded, but didn't look up.

The truth was, I hadn't. Not really. Looking back, I could see it, but at the time, I'd just dismissed it as Wreg being Wreg. Maybe even going out of his way to make Jon uncomfortable because it amused him. I knew they'd been hanging out a lot lately, maybe more than normal, but I figured that had to do with Revik putting pressure on Wreg to get Jon trained.

After a pause, I hesitated, then shrugged, caressing his ribs as he pulled the shirt the rest of the way over his head, catching a button in my hair. I stopped him to untangle it, then watched him pull it the rest of the way off. Pretty much instantly, pain started somewhere in my lower belly, making it hard to look away.

But my mind was still stuck on the Jon and Wreg thing.

"I just worry about Jon," I said finally. "You know what I mean...he's already dealing with a lot. Emotionally, from the last few weeks alone. It's not just Dorje...he was close to Vash, too. He's not coping very well. And Wreg doesn't exactly strike me as low maintenance..."

Hesitating again, Revik seemed to realize I wasn't going to let this go, at least not in the next five seconds. After looking at me a beat too long, he curled an arm behind his head on the carpet, caressing my face with his fingers as his eyes cleared.

"I'll give him a good talking-to," he murmured, kissing my fingers when I touched his face. "...I promise, wife."

"Which one?" I said, giving a humorless laugh.

"Wreg," Revik said, glancing up at me. His eyes were serious again. "I cautioned him once already...and he seemed to hear me. He hasn't exactly been hiding his interest. Honestly, I half-expected Jon to come to me about it..." He shrugged, giving my hair a slightly harder tug. "...Still, it's good in a way. Don't you think?"

I let out a low snort. "Dorje's only been dead a few
weeks,
Revik..."

"I know." He hesitated again, then caressed my face more cautiously. "...Jon's in pain, Allie. He's manifesting more like a seer with the Dorje thing...and seers deal with grief differently. You can't help him with this, not enough anyway. Neither can I..."

"And Wreg can?" I said.

He shrugged, but didn't avert his gaze. "Maybe Wreg can."

I shook my head, frowning. "Look, Wreg is great...this isn't about Wreg. But Jon's going to feel like shit about this. He's probably totally freaking out right now..."

"It's usually better for seers to have sex when we lose someone," Revik said, as if I hadn't spoken, or maybe to head me off. When I looked down at him again, he lowered his voice, making it more subdued as he adjusted his head on his arm. "We need contact...intimate contact. Otherwise the separation can cause even more problems. I've seen it make seers really sick before, Allie...and Jon, well, he's different. I don't know what he is exactly, but he's not reacting to this like a human would, so I thought maybe a seer approach made more sense."

"But that's not going to feel even
remotely
normal to Jon," I said, fighting exasperation. "Humans
grieve.
They do it alone, generally...or with friends and family. They don't jump into bed with the next hot guy who happens along. Jon's not ready to be full-bore seer right now, Revik...this is going to screw with his head. He's going to feel guilty, and he's going to be confused about Wreg..."

Revik nodded, holding up a hand in acknowledgement. "I know. I never said it's going to be easy on him. But please, listen to what I'm saying, wife...the emotional problems from cultural disconnect will not be anywhere near as serious as those he could have if his light gets really out of whack from severe separation pain. He's never dealt with that before, Allie. He won't know what hit him...and the loss and betrayal of a partner is not a gentle introduction to such a thing. He's been struggling...you've seen it. It's why you tried to help him yesterday."

I didn't answer that, either, but found I was chewing on my lip. Maybe he was right. Maybe I should be letting the seers take care of Jon this time. But something about abandoning Jon at probably the worst time of his life to Wreg didn't sit right with me either.

Still studying my eyes, Revik tugged on my hair again, raising his fingers to caress my face once I was looking at him. His voice grew soft.

"I love, Jon, Allie," he said. "...I'm trying to look out for him too, I promise you I am. I won't do anything to hurt him, not deliberately. But either way, this thing with Dorje is going to hurt. He's been suppressing it, and suppressing the pain, and it's not good for him. It might be what a human would do, but it's making him sick..."

Sighing a little, I relaxed involuntarily. I couldn't argue with that.

"I know," I admitted.

"He's going to be okay," Revik said. "Wreg will be good to him. He promised me he would. And he meant it, I could tell. I think Wreg might be more serious about Jon than you realize..."

I gave a low snort, but didn't answer. Instead I covered my eyes with my hand, trying not to frown and not really succeeding.

"I'm a crappy sister," I said finally.

When Revik didn't speak, but continued to caress my hair, I shook my head, unable to find words for what I wanted to say. I didn't particularly want to throw cold water on the two of us...especially right then...but Wreg's idea of 'being good' to Jon didn't exactly reassure me. Mainly because I had absolutely no idea what it meant. In any case, I felt responsible. Not for the Dorje thing, but maybe for not noticing what was going on with him and Wreg until it was too late. Maybe for some of the things Jon said to me in the dressing room the day before.

It didn't help that Jon acted like Wreg was out to kill him half the time. He'd been complaining about the sight training for weeks now.

Hell, he talked like he was
afraid
of Wreg.

"...I think it surprised him more than it did the rest of us," Revik said finally, smiling faintly.

"Wreg?" I said. "You mean Wreg, right?"

Revik nodded, leaning up to kiss me again, caressing my belly with his fingers when he repositioned his head on his arm. He used more light that time, and I could tell he was worried about me...and probably wishing we'd waited to talk until later. But the damage was done. I was having trouble getting my mind off Jon now, and the fact that he was probably lying somewhere in Wreg's room right now...panicking, if I knew him at all.