Beautiful Perfection (Beautifully Unbroken Book 2) (22 page)

“Sure,” I smiled. “I would love that, besides I don’t want to be lying in bed all day every day, that is more stressful than being active, and Blake?”

“Hhmm?”

“We’re not leaving for London until we know that your mum is one hundred percent out of the woods okay?”

“We know that she is going to be fine Jo once the surgery is over.”

“Blake.” I cursed.

Blake puffed out a deep breath, “Okay, okay, but she is going to be fine so really this conversation is pointless.”

“Are you doing okay?” I asked carefully.

“Of course,” he turned to me and smiled briefly. “I know that I almost freaked out back there but I am fine. And why do you worry so much about me when you are the pregnant one?” He laughed once and gave my knee a gentle squeeze.

“Because I love you and I worry about you.”

“Well don’t worry about me; I’m fine.” His voice quietened.

“I heard you talking to Ester this morning.”

“Oh yeah, I totally forgot to tell you with…. Everything.” Blake took a deep breath in, “she has arranged a meeting on Friday with the show’s producers. They want to try and lure me back,” He said quietly.

“Whatever you decide is fine by me, you know that right?”

“I have made my decision Jo and they are not going to change it. My career means nothing to me right now; there are far more important things I have to worry about.” Blake’s eyes focused on the road ahead, I could sense in his voice that he was petrified of what lay ahead but he just wasn’t prepared to let me in. Blake changed the subject quickly as he began talking about what we were going to have for dinner tonight; he was distracting himself from his thoughts. I had hoped that he would be feeling a little less stressed now that my blood pressure was improving and he had had his little moment in Sam’s office, but that didn’t seem to be the case. I prayed to God that by the end of next week we could put this horrible chapter behind us and begin to look to the future again with nothing hanging over us.

*~*~*

We had been back from Blake’s parents for just two nights and each of those nights Blake hadn’t managed to sleep. There was never any doubt that Blake was a heavy sleeper, an earthquake would only wake Blake if it threw him from his bed with so much force that he would have no choice but to wake up, but the past two nights had been different. He was unaware that I had noticed but each time he woke from the little sleep he had managed, he would leave the bedroom quickly as if in a panic only to return an hour or more later seeming calmer.

I would sense his eyes burning into me for a while each time he climbed back into bed; he would then kiss me gently and whisper that he loves me before turning over and trying to sleep; the way he told me he loved me each time was full of sadness and desperation. Both mornings after his disturbed night, I would ask how he was feeling but it would always be the same simple reply;
‘never better’
.

The truth was that since the moment that he had become so close to cracking at the doctor’s office, he had completely closed down, shutting me out from his true thoughts and his real feelings. I could see that he was trying to protect me but I didn’t need protecting, I didn’t want protecting not anymore and definitely not from my husband. I just needed Blake to let me in so I could care for him the way that he always cared for me.

I had spoken to Julia both evenings since we came home but Blake had made an excuse each time, asking me to tell her that he would call her later; that call would never be made. I didn’t know how much longer Blake could continue this façade but I was adamant that I would be there for him the minute that he let down his guard and would need me the most.

“So,” Blake said as he finished buttoning up his shirt ready for his meeting with the producers. “What are your plans for today?” He looked exhausted and tired but he tried desperately to cover it from me.

“Oh you know,” I replied, stretching my body as I lay in bed. “The same as usual; nothing. I am so bored Blake, I need to do something, anything but just lay around all day.”

“You need to rest and you know that. You heard what Sam told you the other day, you are getting near the end and your blood pressure still isn’t stable.” I growled at him in frustration. Blake laughed lightly before turning to face me.

“How do I look?”

“Like I may not be doing nothing today after all,” I smirked. “Come here, I need to see if you taste as good as you look.”

Blake shook his head in amusement as he walked over and placed himself on the edge of the bed, he leaned towards me slowly before covering my mouth with his. I let out a small groan as his tongue stroked against mine softly and torturously.

“Hhmm, you really do taste good,” I said against his mouth. “Come back to bed?” I asked as I lifted the blankets to let him back in.

“No can do I’m afraid,” Blake stood quickly from the bed and began shrugging into his jacket. “I need to leave like, five minutes ago,” He said as he looked at his watch.

“You look tired,” I observed.

“I am fine; I am always fine so stop worrying about me and concentrate on you, and stop pouting; it makes me feel even guiltier about leaving you.” He placed a quick kiss to my cheek and headed towards the door. “I won’t be late, but if you need me, call me, okay?”

I folded my arms across my chest and pouted even more to which Blake laughed but he also gave in and came back for one more kiss. He then turned and left the apartment, leaving me alone and bored and looking for something to do.

*~*~*

I had been sitting at the dining table for the past two hours staring at the letter in my hand like it was about to explode like a live grenade.

She wanted to see me; Sara, who had made my life a living hell, had requested me to visit her in prison before her sentencing. I wasn’t even sure that requesting to meet with your victim was even legal, but after speaking to Theo briefly, he informed me that it was sometimes considered as closure for victims to meet with the defendant before sentencing.

He then advised me that because of my late stage in pregnancy along with my high blood pressure that he would strongly recommend that I stayed away from Sara, especially if I was so adamant that I wanted to be at her sentencing. I was now faced with the decision of whether or not I wanted to confront her face to face and get that closure.

I had been sorting through the mountain of mail that had accumulated since our visit to Blake’s parents’ house when the letter had practically jumped out at me. I knew immediately who the letter was from; after all, I had no connection to any other criminal.

I was then forced to decide whether or not Blake would agree to me seeing Sara, which in fact I already knew the answer to but something inside of me was telling me that yes, I needed to see her.

Something was definitely telling me that I needed to do this and even though no one would agree with me doing so, I needed the closure that the visit would provide.

I had tried calling Blake for just over an hour since arranging to meet with Sara. His phone had gone straight to voicemail each time, and each time, I had left a message ensuring him that everything was okay and I just wondered how the meeting was going; the last thing that I wanted to do was worry him. When he hadn’t called back, I showered, changed and headed downstairs to Casey and Alex’s apartment.

“Well hello there stranger,” Casey said enthusiastically. “Jo isn’t it?” she teased.

“Hi,” I smiled nervously. “Is Alex here?” I asked as I looked around Casey’s shoulder into the apartment.

“Am I not good enough for you now that we don’t live together so you want to hang out with my husband instead?” Casey cocked an eyebrow and smirked at me.

“Is he here?” I repeated as Casey’s smile dropped and concern etched her face.

“He’s at work, what’s going on, are you okay?” She stepped aside and welcomed me inside.

“I need you to do something for me and not tell Alex,” I said firmly as I stepped past her and walked into the kitchen. “Because Alex will tell Blake and if Blake knows it will only cause a problem between us and he’s got enough going on without the added stress of what I need you to do for me.”

“What’s wrong Jo? And why are you acting so strange?” Casey asked confused.

“Casey, you’re my best friend right?” Casey nodded. “You would do anything to help without judging me right?”

“I’m not sure that I like where this is going, but yes I am your best friend and ‘
within reason’
” she said firmly. “You know that I would do anything for you.”

“Good,” I nodded. “I need you to take me to prison.” Casey burst into laughter, actually holding her stomach as she laughed so much. “Sara wants to see me and I want to hear what she has to say,” I added. Casey’s laughter stemmed as she watched me in disbelief.

“What?” She asked in shock.

“I need to go and see her and I can’t do it alone. Please Casey, if I don’t do it now then I will chicken out and then I will regret not going and listening to her lame excuses.”

“Just, hold on a second,” Casey said as she shook her head. “Why the hell do you want to go and see Sara? Can you even go and see her? I mean you are the victim in all of this, she tried to kill you Jo, more than once I might add and as for Cooper, well she did kill him, so please, forgive me for asking you this again, but why the hell do you want to go and see Sara in prison?”

“She has requested to see me,” I said quickly. “I called Theo and it’s all legal and above board, he said that victims sometimes use it as closure.”

“She is being sentenced next week Jo, isn’t that closure enough?”

“I need to speak to her Casey, I need to know why, why she changed her plea, why she did everything that she did, why Cooper protected her; I just need answers that I can only get from her.”

“You play with fire Jo, you’re gonna get burned,” Casey warned.

“Please, you are the only person I have who I can trust to help me do this without hurting Blake, it will only be ten minutes maximum, it’s all sorted out and all I need to do is turn up, speak to her and go home. No one needs to know and then I will have my answers and my closure, please Casey, please,” I shamelessly begged.

Casey sighed heavily as she rubbed her eyes in frustration. “Blake isn’t going to be happy if he finds out Jo.”

“I will tell Blake when I need to, just not today. He is under too much pressure at the moment as it is and I don’t want to add more to it when I can see that he is struggling.”

“Going to see Sara is going to add more to it Jo, trust me.”

“Please Casey, please just for one second put yourself in my shoes and see why this is important to me,” I placed my hands together as if begging. “I will do anything you want, absolutely anything you need if you just drive me there, please, all I am asking you for is a lift to the prison.”

Casey shook her head slowly as she visibly began to cave, “If you weren’t so pregnant you would be easy to say no to.” She sighed in frustration as she grabbed her bag and coat and headed for the door. “Come on, let’s go.”

*~*~*

There was a smell, a distinct, disturbing sickly smell of disinfectant and food that I imagined could only be served to caged animals in the room that I was sat in waiting for Sara to enter.

I wasn’t sure if it was the smell that had gotten my stomach in complete knots or the fact that I was once again about to come face to face with Sara for the first time since visiting her in hospital. Casey had spent the whole journey here trying to talk me out of the visit but my stubborn mind was having none of it, once I had made the decision to come here, there was definitely no turning back.

Casey had been made to wait outside the building, which had annoyed her as she had expressed her concern for me and was worried about how I was going to cope with seeing Sara. I hadn’t even given a thought to the fact that Casey wouldn’t have been allowed in the building. Watching her face just before the door slammed shut behind me made the nerves inside of me bubble up for the first time since reading the visiting request.

I still hadn’t heard back from Blake when I reached the prison which I took to be a blessing, the very last thing that I wanted now was to have to lie to Blake about where I was when he was already on the verge of destruction.

I heard the door open slowly behind me before the silence that had surrounded me became filled with the sound of metal being scraped heavily across the floor. I took a deep breath to calm my ever growing nerves, my heart was pounding so hard against my chest that it became difficult to concentrate on anything other than trying to keep myself calm. My eyes finally met with Sara’s as she was guided into the seat opposite me, she was barely recognizable as she sat shackled with chains to her arms and legs. The orange jumpsuit that she was wearing hung from her skinny body and her long red hair looked dull and uncared for as it sat tied up into a messy bun on top of her head. One thing that remained on Sara’s face that she could never lose was the smug smile that she wore constantly before she turned into the vile monster she now was, that smile was still as present as ever.

“Hey, Jo, I almost didn’t recognize you, you got fat.” She spat out.

“I got pregnant,” I replied forcing a smile.

“Of course you did,” she nodded. “How else could you have trapped Blake into staying with you?”

I placed my hands flat to the table and sighed, shaking my head at her lack of conscience. “Okay Sara, you got me here, now why did you want to see me?”

“To be honest Jo, I didn’t.” She shrugged. “I just knew that you wouldn’t be able to resist coming here, turns out I was right.”

“Still playing games I see.” I shook my head in disgust at her.

“Why change the habit of a lifetime huh?”

“Tell me, what is going on inside that ridiculously, delusional small mind of yours, Sara, that makes you think that you have anything to smile about? You are going to rot in prison for the rest of your life. You are going to die, old and alone with nothing but memories of prison food and the occasional ball game or exercise out in the yard. You had everything Sara, my God you had the best life you could have wished for and then for some stupid, ridiculous reason, you spoilt it for yourself and for Cooper, remember Cooper? You killed him Sara,
you
killed Cooper
. Guess what that has left you with? Nothing, you have nothing Sara,” I said leaning forward towards her. “
Nothing
. So,” I sat back in my seat and folded my arms across my chest, “you tell me, it’s not really something for you to laugh about is it?”