Deadly Is the Kiss (7 page)

As she continued to stroke him, Ashe had to lock his knees to keep them from buckling. He rubbed her clit with more pressure as he pumped his fingers into her, their gazes locked on the erotic movement of their hands. Needing to feel her come, unable to wait for it, Ashe shook the sweat out of his eyes and hooked his fingers forward, finding the sweet spot deep inside her that sent her crashing over the edge. She kept using her hand to pump his shaft as she came in a hard, wet rush, the feel and scent of her so sweet it nearly killed him. Lowering his head, Ashe captured her husky cries with his mouth, feeding on the sexy sounds until he knew he couldn’t hold back.

“Shit,” he snarled, drawing back his head so he could see her face, his fingers still working inside her. “You’d better stop.
Now.
”

Instead of releasing him, she blushed as she stroked him faster, silently daring him to follow through.

Ashe had often wondered what kind of lover Juliana would be, the question occupying his mind well into the night on too many occasions to count. Tentative and shy? Or fearless and bold? But she was neither. Instead, she was a heady blend of the two, the unusual, unfamiliar combination driving him outta his mind.

“I mean it,” he growled. “You’re pushing me.”

“Then prove it,” she whispered, flicking another shy glance down at his cock, and that was it. Gritting his teeth, Ashe came so hard it was almost more pain than pleasure, the sensation so intense it felt like being turned inside out.

He didn’t know how much time had passed when he finally leaned forward and pressed his damp forehead against hers, sucking air into his burning lungs while waves of pleasure continued to course through him. Reluctantly taking his hand from between her legs, loving the way her body fought to hold on to him, he stroked her hip with his damp fingers, waiting for a sense of ease to come. For his head to clear. But it didn’t happen.

Damn it, he was still hard as a spike, shaking with another violent surge of lust. And he knew she felt the same. They were both starved for more. Desperate and aching for it.

“We’re both Deschanel,” he suddenly grunted, curving his hands in the back of her panties and pushing them down with her jeans. Then he curved his hands over her ass again and hoisted her up, pushing between her thighs. Their species couldn’t carry sexually transmitted diseases, which meant they didn’t need protection. “We don’t need a condom,” he muttered, rubbing his lips across her temple as he notched himself against her small opening, needing to shove himself inside her like he’d never needed anything in his entire life.

She shivered in response to the husky words, then immediately stiffened, tension snapping through her body so fast she cracked her head on the mirror as she reared back. “Oh, God.
Wait! Stop!
”

“Stop?” Ashe held his breath, praying he’d heard her wrong. Despite the warning he’d given her about not stopping, he’d never forced himself on a woman, and he wasn’t about to start now.

“Please,” she whispered, turning her face to the side, her chest lifting with the panting force of her breaths, her hands pushing against his shoulders. “I can’t…”

Shit. Shit.
Shit.
It almost killed him, but he somehow managed to dredge up enough strength to set her on her feet and pull away, taking a step back.

She trembled with nerves, eyes lowered as she yanked up her panties and jeans, fumbling them closed. “We have…we have to stop this
now,
before something happens.”

Despite his discomfort, a wry, gritty laugh burst from Ashe’s throat. “You came so hard you screamed, Jules. I’d hardly say that’s nothing,” he pointed out with a taunting smile, irritated as hell that she’d chickened out on him…but even more so because she was trying to act as if nothing had even happened between them.

She glared up at him. “You know what I mean.”

“Yeah, I do,” he murmured, reaching out and rubbing his thumb over the front of her sweater, right over the tight tip of her breast, her nipple swollen and sensitive. He did it partly to remind her that she enjoyed his touch, but mostly because he couldn’t stop himself. He wanted that tight little nipple in his mouth, on his tongue. Wanted her stripped bare and under him, and he wanted it now. “But there isn’t any point in pretending we don’t want it.”

“Isn’t there?” she demanded, knocking his hand away.

Ashe lifted his gaze back to her eyes. “Not when I know it’s going to happen.” And it would. He didn’t doubt it. And maybe that was the only logical answer to the problem. Not touching her hadn’t worked. It’d only had him running around in circles and chasing his tail for months now, while suffering in a world of pain. So he’d take the opposite approach and gorge himself on her until he’d worked the Burn down to a dull, mellow glow. One he could live with when they parted ways, getting on with their lives.

True, he’d never heard of anything like that working before. But then, he’d never heard of anyone trying, either.

Juliana, however, was still looking at him as if he’d grown two heads. “I asked for your help, Ashe. Not… I didn’t ask for sex. You…you don’t even
like
me.”

“Parts of me seem to like you just fine,” he offered drily, shoving himself back into his jeans, the task not an easy one, given that he was still painfully hard.

“This is ridiculous. Are you going to help me or not?”

“I’m an idiot, but yeah, I’m going to help you.” He looked right at her. “And you’re going to help me, too. Think of it as your contribution to my mental stability.”

“I don’t think—”

“You don’t have to think, Jules.” Ashe watched her from beneath his lashes as he reached out and pressed the stop button for the second time, the elevator making a low hum as it once again started its slow ascent. His voice remained hard, determined, implacable—because no way in hell did he plan on letting her change his mind. “All you have to do is lie down and enjoy it.”

CHAPTER FOUR

J
ULIANA
COULDN
’
T
BELIEVE
what she’d just heard. She’d known he was arrogant, but this was over the top even for Ashe. She’d never been so pissed, and so turned on, in her entire life. Who the hell did he think he was?

She’d held her tongue as they made their way from the elevator to his room, but the second the door closed behind him and he flipped the lock, she asked, “Are you actually saying that you’ll only help me if I sleep with you? Have sex with you?”

“It’s not a one-sided deal, Jules. I’ll let you have sex with me, too,” he drawled with his typical warped sense of humor. “But, yeah, that’s my offer.”

Juliana didn’t think she’d ever been more shocked. Not even when the man she had thought loved her had proved that he…well, that he didn’t.

“Your
offer,
” she repeated, her voice shaking with anger. “What you’re offering turns me into a whore.”

His mouth flattened into a hard, tense line as he crossed the room to her. “Don’t look at it like that,” he said gruffly, tossing her pack onto the room’s small sofa.

“How else am I supposed to look at it?”

Something that almost looked like desperation flared in his eyes, though she knew she must be reading him wrong. Projecting her own foolish fantasies onto him. Ashe Granger wasn’t desperate for her. This was just some kind of power play on his part. One she was ridiculously tempted to fall for, especially now that she knew just how incredible it was to fool around with him. She’d imagined it so many times, but reality had been much more intense than any of her fantasies. Hotter…richer…more painfully intimate.

She knew that for as long as she lived, she’d never forget how he’d looked when he’d come in her hand. His gorgeous face tight with pleasure, tendons standing out in his neck, all those incredible muscles in his body rigid and straining. He’d been the most beautiful, masculine, breathtaking thing she’d ever seen, and she was more terrified of him than ever—because now she knew exactly what she was missing.

“I want to help you,” he said with rough impatience, pulling her from her dangerous thoughts, “but I can’t if I’m thinking about nailing you twenty-four bloody hours a day.”

She could only imagine what her expression looked like at that moment. “So I sleep with you instead? To what? Give you peace of mind?”

He shoved his fingers through the short strands of his hair in a purely male gesture of frustration. “Nothing about this is perfect, but it’s the reality of the situation. So we have to face it.”

“Yeah, well, your idea of reality is ugly,” she shot back, flinging the words at him.

His reply was soft. “I’m sorry, but I can’t do anything to change that.”

Her head dropped back on her shoulders as she stared up at the ceiling, trying so hard not to cry. She had a vague impression of the room around her, of warm colors and classy antiques, but Ashe took too much of her focus for anything more substantial than that. Knowing she had to get a handle on the situation before it got out of hand, Juliana finally forced her gaze back to his. “Look…I know you’re probably still jacked up from the fight, but that’s—” she licked her lips, fighting to make her voice stronger “—just adrenaline. If you’d…if you’d just take a moment to calm down, you’ll realize that you don’t really want to have sex with me.”

A kind of stunned disbelief flared in his eyes, and he seemed to choose his next words with care. “Yeah, you usually irritate the hell out of me,” he said, his deep voice gritty and thick. “But what ever gave you the impression I didn’t want to fuck you?”

“What gave me the impression?” Her laugh sounded hysterical. “Gee, I don’t know. Maybe the fact that you screwed your way through the women who work at my compound, shoving it right in my face? God, you even slept with my cousin Arianna, one of the most self-centered, vindictive women I’ve ever known. She despises me!”

He went very still, watching her like a hawk. “What makes you think I slept with Arianna?”

Her breath trembled past her lips. “Because I saw you making out with her at the compound the last time you were there.”

“You were spying on me?”

Instead of answering him, she asked, “Have you even considered the fact that I don’t want to sleep with you?”

His eyes went cold and hard. “That’s a damn lie.”

“How would you know?” she demanded hotly. “You can’t read my mind!”

He gave another ugly, gritty laugh. “Are you forgetting that I was there in that elevator with you, Jules? You were already so ripe for another orgasm, you’d have come the second I got inside you.”

“And you know women’s bodies well enough to determine that with nothing but your hand?” Her voice was veering toward what could only be described as shrill.

“You’re damn right I do!”

“You’re so arrogant it’s not even funny!” she shouted, fisting her hands at her sides as she fought the urge to slap him.

“And this isn’t a damn joke,” he snarled, the muscle pulsing in his jaw a testament to his mounting anger. “I’m the one on the edge over you. That’s not arrogance, Juliana. It’s fucking desperation!”

There was that word again…
desperation
. It was so powerful…so compelling. Especially to a hopeless romantic like herself who never learned.

It was truly terrifying, how badly she wanted to believe him.

Between her sharp, panting breaths, she somehow managed to ask, “Why, Ashe? I mean…why me?”

“I wish to hell I knew,” he muttered, rubbing his hand over his mouth, the stormy silver of his eyes barely visible through the thick fringe of his lashes as he glared at her.

“Don’t be flippant,” she snapped, trembling with emotion. “Just tell me the truth!”

He made a sharp, impatient gesture with his hand. “I could tell you how beautiful you are, but you already know that. But it’s more than your looks. Something about you…I can’t explain it. Call it chemistry. Call it whatever the hell you want to. All I know is that I’ve wanted to be buried inside you since the moment I first set eyes on you.”

“You hid it well,” she murmured warily, knowing she’d be an idiot to believe him.

His stare drilled into hers. “Yeah, well, I’m not the only one good at hiding things.”

She did her best to ignore the guilt that slithered through her insides at his quiet words, but didn’t succeed. “I’m being as honest with you as I can, Ashe.”

“As you can, huh?” His gaze slid toward the massive window that nearly took up the entire far wall of the small sitting room, where the historic skyline of London sprawled out in meandering lines, the majestic dome of St. Paul’s rising in the distance. “The reason I never acted on the attraction before,” he said after a moment, hands shoved deep in his front pockets, “is because I didn’t plan on doing anything about it. Seemed like a…like a bad idea for a lot of reasons. But that’s no longer a realistic option if we’re going to be stuck together.” His gaze reconnected with hers, deep and dark and piercing, his voice even rougher than before. “If there was a chance in hell I could keep my hands off you, I would. But I know my limits.”

Oh, man, he was good. There was so much hunger in his rough voice, etched into the rugged planes of his handsome face, she could feel her body readying itself in response, just as desperate as
he’d
claimed to be. But this was…God, it was so risky. She knew exactly how much danger she was courting. How much pain. Men like Ashe Granger might be gorgeous, but they were like triple-chocolate-fudge cake. You knew it was bad for you, but you craved it anyway. And a nibble was never enough. Once you tasted it, you just wanted more…and more, until you paid for your hunger in pounds…and when it came to men, in mountains of heartache.

“Ashe, even if I wanted to say yes,” she whispered, “I don’t know how I could. I’m barely keeping it together as it is. I’m scared and worried and sick of being made to feel like I’m an inch tall. If I let you use me, it would be the final blow.”

He came a little closer, stopping less than an arm’s length away, his heat blasting against her like the burning warmth of a sun. “I’m not trying to cut you down to size. But it doesn’t change the facts. If I’m helping you do this, I don’t need to waste time worrying about when I’ll be able to touch you,” he explained in a husky rasp, curling his fingers under her chin. “I’ll need to know it’s a given. That I can have my fix whenever I need it.”

She gave a shaky laugh as he put his hands on her waist, pulling her against his body. “Whenever, huh? I’m on a deadline, Ashe. I need to get to the bottom of this, and fast.” She placed her hands on his chest, her mouth watering at the feel of his firm, cut muscles beneath the soft cashmere of the sweater. “I can’t…I can’t just wallow the days away in bed with you, no matter how good you are.”

He touched his lips to her temple. “I’m damn good,” he rumbled sexily, his voice like a dark caress against her skin, seducing her senses. “And we’ll find the time.”

Juliana closed her eyes, knowing she was going to regret this as much as she enjoyed it. “Ashe, this is so crazy. I know I’m partly responsible for what happened in the elevator. I…I kissed you back, and I…I touched you. But what you’re asking…it isn’t smart.”

“Fuck smart.” His breath was warm against her ear, his tongue flicking teasingly inside the sensitive shell. “I know it isn’t easy giving in. We don’t have a lot of…trust between us. But I give you my word that by the time I’m done with you, you won’t regret saying yes.”

Oh, ouch. As she lifted her lashes, a strange kind of pain pierced her heart, reminding her of just how foolish this was. Softly…and a little wryly, she said, “But you will be done with me, huh?”

He pulled back just enough that he could see her eyes, his gaze dark and thoughtful. She sensed he was going to try to offer some kind of explanation, then stopped himself. Instead, he simply said, “Let’s deal with that when we get there.”

Knowing she couldn’t allow this man any leverage—that she would only end up destroyed if she did—Juliana forced herself to see the situation for the cold, harsh exchange that it was. “I don’t know why you’re bothering to put on the moves.” Her voice was brisk, her hands no longer spread over his chest but curled into tight fists. “This isn’t about seduction or pleasure. You just want to nail me.”

“Don’t.” The low word vibrated with angry frustration. “If all I wanted was to screw, I could already be doing it. There were at least twenty women back in that club where I met with the vamp tonight who would have been willing to say yes. Hell, they’d have been
eager
to say it. But I wasn’t interested, because you’re the only woman I want right now.” He raised one hand to her face, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear, then rubbed his thumb across her cheek, the tender gestures so at odds with his guttural tone. “I need to have you under me, Jules. I need it badly enough to make an ass of myself by pushing you into this. And yeah, I know it’s a shitty thing to do. But I’m doing it anyway.”

She blinked, utterly dazed. They were hardly the most romantic words she had ever heard, but there was no mistaking the urgent hunger roughening their edges. Or the raw desire she could see burning in his beautiful eyes. “When you say things like that, it’s so confusing.”

“Then we should stop talking and start—”

She placed her fingers over his mouth, muffling his words. “Fine, I…I accept,” she whispered, her heart beating so hard and fast that it hurt. “But I…I have a condition.”