Authors: Kristen Strassel,Allyson Starr
Bret clasped my hand. “Where do you think you’re going? I’m not done with you yet.”
“Were you here when your stepmother almost caught you eating out her daughter? I pretty much considered that our fade-to-black moment.”
“Hell, no.” Bret pulled the shorts away from me. “She’s halfway through a bottle of Chardonnay, and she got what she wanted.” He pulled me to my feet. “But I didn’t.”
I was going to throw up. Tonight’s emotions spun like a blender in my head. I stood, meaning to walk bollocky-bare assed out of the room and regroup. Hopefully Mom was half in the bag, in her room for the night. Heat from Bret’s body seared me. I was back under his spell.
He backed me up against the door, barely an inch between us. If I took a deep breath, my breasts would hit
his T-shirt. I did it, just to make sure. The sensation sent a fresh round of pins and needles through me. He didn’t say a word as he reached into his pocket and then unzipped his shorts. His cock brushed my belly.
Bret handed me the condom. I ripped the fucker open with my teeth and tossed the wrapper on the floor, to join the rest of the garbage that littered it. He was a master at giving me power while taking it all
away at the same time. Bret chuckled, but his gaze never left mine—full of
challenge, with maybe a little bit of lust. It was so frigging sexy. I hated him.
I grabbed his cock and moved up and down the shaft slowly, but not gently. “This is what I was talking about.” My voice was low, as I gripped him tightly.
Bret blinked long and slow, his body writhing from the sensation rocketing through it.
“Not gentle. Hard,” I said.
Bret snapped his eyes open and pushed my hand away. He snatched the condom out of my hand and rolled it down his cock in one fluid motion. That steely stare was ever present. Emotionless, yet it said so much. I almost fell over when he picked up my leg and hooked it on his hip. I’d barely caught my balance before he rammed his cock into me.
Fuck yes.
The door rattled with every thrust, but I’d left my body at this point. I had no reason. I was just sensation, rocking my hips to meet his body. I tangled my hands in his hair to steady myself. He rested his forehead on
mine, his stare so close it was blurry as he continued slamming into me.
Bret groaned as he came, his body crushing me against the door. We panted, stuck together, sweat trickling down my brow. “I’m proud of you, Gemma,” he said.
“Why?”
“You never used your safe word.” He took the condom off his dick but thankfully he didn’t throw it on the ground, and zipped his shorts. “Any time you need to use it—it doesn’t matter what we’re doing—say the word, and I’ll stop.”
“You never told me yours.” I put my shorts back on and opened the door a crack. The coast was clear.
He shook his head. “I don’t have one.”
“Why not?” If he did this stuff all the time, he had to have one. Unless he was a lying sack of shit. It was possible.
“I told you. I have no limits.”
“I’m worried about you. I’m having a hard time too, sweetie. But I hate to see you retreat the way you have,” Mom said on the way home from work.
I wasn’t driving, or I would’ve caused a multi-car pileup on the Verrazano Bridge. I was still convinced she knew I was the girl Bret hid from her the other night. I sneaked around the house like a cat burglar, unwilling to face anyone I lived with. All the emotions bubbled too close to the surface for my skin to mask them.
But she didn’t suspect anything besides the obvious. I missed the hell out of my dad.
“It’s been hard,” I said. “One of the reasons I decided to come home this summer was to spend time with you and Dad, and he’s not here. All the things I planned with him, I don’t feel like doing
anymore. Because it would be wrong.”
“Your dad wouldn’t want you to miss out on your life because he’s not here. That’s the last thing he’d want.” Mom frowned, her lip quivering like it did any time she talked about him. Traffic had slowed to a stop. Friday afternoon traffic was a nightmare. “Have you been in touch with any of the girls? I expected a full house this summer. Now that Bret’s opened the pool, you should invite them over.”
“No one came back this year.” At first it bothered me that I wouldn’t see them, but watching all their updates on social media, I was kind of glad they weren’t here. I was a hot mess—no Dad, no real job lined up, no solid plan for the future—and I certainly couldn’t tell them about my new hobby. And once they all started making a play for Bret, I’d lose my shit.
“Any time you want to borrow the car, all you have to do is ask. What about your friends from the zoo? Are you inviting any of them to the party? I expect to see Nikki there. The two of you are always together.”
“Yeah, I already invited her.” Which made me nervous. She’d taken my invite as carte blanche to ask anything about Bret. She was a little more into Enemy Impact than I anticipated. Bret would eat her up like she had whipped cream and a cherry on top. “I’ve been studying to take the GRE again, and honestly, I don’t have any money. That’s why I’ve been staying home.”
“Just ask, Gemma.” Mom sighed. “I’ll give you money if you need some.”
“Mom, I’m a college graduate with a full-time job.” One with no pay, but still. “You don’t have to give me an allowance. I’ve made my own choices.”
“That’s exactly why I think you deserve a break. You’re working so hard, but you’re not seeing the results. I’ve been there. It’s frustrating. You should be rewarded for it, and I’m happy to help. Especially after everything you’ve done for me lately.” She barely managed a smile. “What about Bret?”
I almost threw up. “What about him?”
“The two of you could spend time together.”
Traffic was moving again, so she was too busy paying attention the road to see my eyes almost pop out of my head. I turned toward the window and rolled it down. I couldn’t breathe.
“He’s been a big help this summer. If you give him a chance as an adult, you’d see he’s not so bad.”
Oh, I gave him a chance, all right. “I’ll think about it.”
**
Bret cornered me on my way up the stairs. “You’re avoiding me.”
Damn straight I was. The other night freaked me out. How close we came to getting caught. How much I still wanted more. How all I could see when I closed my eyes were his, boring into my soul, as he fucked me against his bedroom door. I didn’t need to see him again; he’d haunt me forever. Had I seen him coming, I would’ve turned around, gone into another room, and pretended to be busy until he left the house. Not very badass of me, but playing hard to get wasn’t easy. Bret knew he had me. He wasn’t going out every night anymore. I didn’t care enough to ask him why. At least that’s what I told myself.
I almost turned around, but instead I kept going, making him back up the stairs. “You’re a genius,” I said, pushing past him when I got to the top. “Maybe you should go on a game show with those big brains of yours and try to win back some of the money I’ll be taking from you.”
Bret grabbed my arm. He pressed his lips together, fighting and losing a battle to suppress a smile. “The first thing I’ll do with that money is fuck you with it,” he growled in my ear. I froze. Mom could come around the corner any second, and he was using the tone that made everything in my body short circuit. “I’ve been thinking about it. It’s more money than I know what to do with. I may pay off your student loans, buy you a phone made in this century, and send you to grad school. I’ll own you, Gemma. You can pay me back by sucking my cock until your debt is satisfied.”
I gulped.
“It’s your turn to host. I’ll be there in an hour. That gives you plenty of time to come up with something good.”
I almost fell over when he let go of me.
**
Bret had me furious. Since he pushed me to places I didn’t know existed, it was only fair of me to return the favor. The problem was I believed him when he said he had no limits. There weren’t any videos of him with guys on Tumblr, but there were plenty of him and his bandmates tag-teaming groupies. A couple drinks, a couple pills, and everyone was the same. A bunch of warm holes.
I knew the feeling. I wasn’t judging him; I’d fooled around with my roommate from freshman year. Both of us had been recently liberated from our virginity and shared the frustration that eighteen-year-old boys didn’t know what to do with their mouths or their cocks. If it weren’t for her, I’d probably still lie back like a dead fish, happy to get a couple pumps before the guy passed out on top of me.
But Bret had split personalities. Asshole mixed with caring lover. And I was two different people to him—Gem and Gemma. The line between them blurred but never faded completely.
I was dying to know how he’d act with another man. Would he submit or be the one in control? He was willing to submit to me last time I’d hosted our playdate, but I couldn’t dominate him. I wanted to. Desperately. Not just because I’d have a chance of
him conceding to me, and wining the money, but I wanted the power of bringing him to his knees. Everything about him was sex, and if I could top him—get him to totally surrender to my will—it would be the sexiest thing ever.
I told Mom I’d been studying, and I was thankful she didn’t ask me what. I’d been learning everything I could about anal sex. The closest
to it I’d ever done was stick my finger up my ex’s ass, since one of my girlfriends told me it was the fastest way to get a guy to come. I didn’t get anything out of it, but he got off me and left. I didn’t have to listen to him snore all night. Double the pleasure.
That wasn’t exactly what I had in mind for tonight. I wanted to make sure I got this right. Bret would pick my inexperience out of his teeth while he laughed at me if I made any rookie mistakes.
My toys weren’t safe for this. They had small seams and narrow bases. Bret seemed to have an arsenal. I could tell him to bring one along for the ride, but the element of surprise was just as important a tool in this game as our bodies. We were mind fucking each other, and our bodies reaped the rewards. I had to rely on some surface stimulation, baby oil, and my hands.
Mom wouldn’t be so hot for me to hang out with Bret if she knew I planned on sticking my fingers up his ass.
I was as ready for this as I could be. I opened the door before Bret even finished knocking.
“I figured you’d run away from me,” he said, kicking off his shoes and lying back on the bed. “You’ve been doing it for days.”
Second time he brought it up. “Have I?” I shrugged as I unzipped his shorts. “Contrary to what you think, the world doesn’t revolve around Bret Starling. I’m a busy girl.”
“You’ve been slacking.” He sat up and took off his shirt, then lifted his hips and waited for me to pull down his shorts. I would’ve left him hanging, but all the fabric got in the way of my plans. “The party’s in a couple days. Ellen’s freaking out. You haven’t done shit.”
“That’s not true.” Bastard. “I’ve been dealing with all the relatives, helping them find places to stay that don’t want their firstborn as payment—”
“You remember our cousins, right? They’d give them back.” Bret smirked. “Little shits.”
It was true. “Whatever. Next time Aunt Donna emails me about her gluten-free diet, I’ll forward it to you. If you need me, I’ll be eating all the gluten.”
“Are you going to invite any of your friends?” He bit his lip, and I wanted to smack him.
“Are you?” Two could play this game. And no way was I going to let his head swell, by telling him how excited Nikki was to meet him.
“I might.” He waggled his eyebrows. “It could be fun. Watch my friends drool over you in your bikini.”
My body warmed, conflicting emotions crashing against each other like a storm front. If he was into Nikki, there was nothing I could do about it, but now I knew how he’d fuck her. Hopefully they’d both spare me the details. I wasn’t interested in any of Bret’s friends. They were all like him, but that wasn’t the problem. I just wanted him.
I hated admitting that to myself more than anything. “That’s nice. Mom’s talked to me about my bikini. Apparently she’d like to see me in a one-piece. Something with more coverage, like a wet suit.”
“Why?” Bret looked like he ate a bug.
Talking about this was the least sexy thing ever. “She thinks I’m too chunky for my bikini.”
“You have a tummy. So what? I like it, because if you didn’t have it, you wouldn’t have those amazing tits, either. No one there is going to look as hot as you. We should wait until we know Ellen’s down for the count and go skinny dipping.” He whispered the last part in my ear.
Okay, I was totally wearing the bikini. I pictured fucking Bret in the pool, the waves slapping against the wall as he slammed against me. I was so wet, we could go swimming in here. “One of your nights.” I pushed him away. “Lie down. I’m sick of talking to you.”
My wish was his command. “I thought you’d never ask.” Sort of.
“I thought you said you were a switch.” I kept my clothes on. Bret was way too easily distracted, and I needed his full, uninterrupted cooperation for what I had planned. “How the hell do you ever submit to anyone? You can’t even shut up for five minutes.”
“Because, Gemma, it’s not just a sex game. It’s a respect thing,” he said, and I slumped my shoulders. “Don’t take it the wrong way. You can’t bark out commands and expect someone to turn into a lapdog. As
I said, I didn’t expect you to get it the first time. It’s good you ask questions. It means you’re into this, and you’re in tune with what’s happening between us. I think you could be an excellent Domme. You just don’t know how yet.”
I’d been about to suck his dick, but I wasn’t in the mood anymore. “How do you do it? I fucking hate you, but I turn into putty in your hands. It’s infuriating, but…” I shook my head. I didn’t need to give away all my secrets. He already knew.
“It’s a mind game.” Bret sat up, his cock still at attention. I’d get to it later.
Good things come to those who wait
, and all that shit. “I don’t even like calling it a game, more like a puzzle. Anyone can follow rules, but only certain people have the brains and patience for a puzzle. You’ve got to get all the pieces to fit, to see the big picture.”
I had so many questions, but I wasn’t sure there were answers. I knew I wanted to top him, just for the sheer satisfaction of doing it, but I couldn’t separate Bret inside the bedroom from Bret outside of it, even if he could do it with me. I looked at him and frowned.
“This is more than just sex,” he continued, and my mouth dropped. “When you get into a power play… This is the good stuff, if you ask me. I can see it all over your face; you want to ask me what you’re doing wrong, but you’re too proud and stubborn to admit it. There it is. Right there. You hate that you like this. It’s your biggest obstacle. Life’s too short for shame, Gemma. It’s a wasted emotion. Get rid of that shit and replace it with pleasure.”
Bret had hit the mark in every facet of my life. I’d spent so much time hating him, when underneath it all I really didn’t. I was working toward this impossible goal, telling myself the endgame was going to make everything worth it, but the reward was so far away I couldn’t even see it. Bret was the only release I had. The only chance I gave myself to relinquish micromanaging every detail of my life. It shouldn’t surprise me I was having a hard time with him. I was floundering, trying to control things I couldn’t. Electricity rippled through my body. Bret reached for my hand, but I moved away from him.
This was becoming
so much more than I expected it to be. A myriad thoughts swirled through my brain, and I wanted to scream at them to shut up. I hated Bret because I envied him. He was always able to put the heavy shit aside and make the best of things. He didn’t take anything too seriously. I always thought he was a selfish asshole, but now I knew I was an envious bitch.
It was a lot to process.
Bret wasn’t giving up. He kneaded my shoulders. I was so tense,
it hurt. “You’ll get there, Gemma. Just let go,” he said.
Once again, he had taken control when it should’ve belonged to me. This time, I was going to let myself be okay with it. I was in over my head enough without worrying about that. This whole thing was like a dance. First the body learned the moves, and then the mind followed. I trusted Bret to show me the ropes. He hadn’t wronged me yet.