Read Emily Post's Great Get-Togethers Online
Authors: Anna Post
Our Favorite Vinaigrettes
A few good vinaigrettes will greatly expand your salad repertoire.
Basic Vinaigrette
Makes just over ¼ cup, enough to dress a salad for 6 or 8. Make more if people will be dressing their own.
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1 tablespoon red or white wine vinegar
¼ teaspoon kosher or ground sea salt
Ground pepper, to taste
Optional: ½ teaspoon minced garlic or shallots
3 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
Herbs of choice: 1 teaspoon chopped fresh parsley, chervil, thyme, or tarragon
In a small bowl, whisk together the mustard, vinegar, salt and pepper, and optional garlic or shallots. Continue whisking and slowly add the olive oil. Dress the salad and sprinkle with the fresh herbs and additional salt, if needed.
Champagne Vinaigrette
Makes 1¼ cups
¼
cup Champagne vinegar
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1 teaspoon minced shallot
½
teaspoon salt
¼
teaspoon sugar
¼
teaspoon ground pepper
1 cup neutral oil such as extra virgin olive oil or canola oil
Whisk together all the ingredients except the oil. Continue whisking and slowly drizzle in the oil until all of it is incorporated. Taste the dressing—if it seems too tart, drizzle in a little more oil. For more bite, add a little more vinegar. Keeps tightly covered in the refrigerator for up to 1 week.
Balsamic Vinaigrette
Makes 1¼ cups
¼
cup balsamic vinegar
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1 teaspoon minced shallot
½
teaspoon minced garlic
1 teaspoon honey
½ teaspoon salt
¼
teaspoon ground pepper
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
Whisk together all the ingredients except the oil. Continue whisking and slowly drizzle in the olive oil until all of it is incorporated. Taste the dressing— if it seems too tart, drizzle in a little more oil. For more bite, add a little more vinegar.
Caesar Dressing
This eggless Caesar dressing really flatters beans, especially something as simple as a big platter of cool, crisp-cooked garden green beans. Upon the good base of two, three, or four types of beans and the dressing, other summery salads can also be built: Consider adding halved red or yellow cherry tomatoes, tender hearts of romaine, boiled new potatoes, or sweet corn cut off the cob. For a picnic salad, omit the lettuce.
Makes about 1½ cups
1 tablespoon red wine vinegar
1 tablespoon chopped anchovies
2 tablespoons Dijon mustard
1 tablespoon chopped garlic
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
Several dashes of Worcestershire sauce
1.
Combine the vinegar, anchovies, mustard, garlic, pepper, and lemon juice in the bowl of a food processor. Pulse to combine. With the motor running, add the olive oil in a steady stream until incorporated. Season to taste with the Worcestershire sauce.
2.
Use immediately or store, tightly covered, in the refrigerator for a week.
T
here’s an art to being a good host. It’s like being the producer, director, and star of your own show. As producer, you’re responsible for all the details of party prep, from invitations to last-minute errands. Just before the doorbell rings, you take off your producer’s hat and step into the roles of director and star. As the director, you guide the action, letting guests know when it’s time to come to the table and when it’s time to say goodbye. As the star, you add the sparkle and set the tone of the party. Successful hosts make this transformation seem easy; guests have no sense of the planning and work that’s gone on behind the scenes. Their time is spent wrapped in your kind attention, stimulated by conversation, and cheered by a meal created for their enjoyment—all of which leaves them feeling, well, entertained.
Being a good host isn’t all that difficult, but it does take forethought, practice, and a little talent for multitasking. Above all, you want to make sure your friends feel comfortable and welcome. The following suggestions will help you hit all the right notes:
Add how and when to respond, and any special info your guests should know, such as what they should wear or what they should bring.
(See Chapter 4, The Invitation Tells All, page 35.)
Greetings and Introductions
A
s the host, it’s your job to greet your guests and introduce new and old friends. Before the party, take a little time to think about each guest. Does everyone know each other? Is there someone new who needs to meet everyone? Do you have some shy guests who may not be comfortable introducing themselves to people they don’t know? Think about your guests’ interests and general background information—who likes music, films, wine, sports, trekking, finance. Offering a point of common reference between two people is an easy way to get a conversation going when strangers meet. At a large party, be on the lookout for guests who are sitting quietly on the sidelines, and make it a point to draw them into a conversational group.
“I’d Like You to Meet...”
Making an introduction is easy: Simply speak to the person you wish to honor first—the guest of honor, your grandmother or other elderly person, your client, your boss. “Samantha [your guest of honor], I’d like you to meet John Parker. John, this is Samantha Evans. Samantha’s just moved here from Seattle.”
Lively Conversation
In the same way that you keep an eye on your guests’ glasses, keep an ear tuned to the conversation. As the host, you’ll need to fill in the gaps or redirect a discussion that’s gone astray. Small talk is a characteristic of the cocktail party, where conversations tend to be short exchanges of information or light give-and-takes about what’s going on.
Dinner parties lend themselves to more in-depth discussions. Even though the classic advice is to steer clear of the four unmentionables (politics, religion, sex, and money), our present society loves to talk about politics, religion, sex, and money! As the host, it’s your job to make sure the discussion remains friendly and respectful, no matter what the topic. In some circles, a really heated debate is a sign of a great evening. That’s fine, if everyone’s in on it and understands the (often unspoken) ground rules. If that’s not the case, then you’ll need to change the subject if the sparks start flying. Stepping in with “How ’bout those Red Sox?” (or some other completely off-topic comment) is a clear way of saying to guests, “We’ve hit the uncomfortable zone.” At the same time, it injects some humor and lets another discussion begin. Then, again, if you’re in Yankees territory, that quip might set off an explosion, so be aware of your context.
Avoid the Awkward Moment
Whether you’re enjoying the company of new friends or old, it’s never a good idea to bring up deeply personal issues at a party. It’s one thing if your dinner partner chooses to divulge a bit of personal info, but you shouldn’t be the one to go down that road (“So, Karen, how was rehab?”). The top ten one-liners to avoid are:
1. “When are you getting married?”
2. “Why aren’t you married?” (or its corollary, “Why don’t you have kids?” or “So, are you going to have kids?”)
3. “When are you due?”
4. “You look great—have you lost weight /had an eye lift/been getting Botox?”
5. “You look awful—are you okay?”
6. “How much does someone in your line of work make?”
7. “How much did that cost?” or “Wow, is that real?”
8. “That can’t be right.”
9. “Should you be eating that?”
10. “As my good friend ____________ was telling me the other day...”(fill in name of celebrity).
Making Small Talk
T
o engage in small talk with your guests, you’ll need to have something to talk about besides the weather. Here are some tips to help you jump-start the conversation:
Accidents Will Happen
S
ometimes being the host means coping with accidents, mishaps, or even bad behavior. It’s inevitable that at some point red wine will be spilled or something will break. For starters, if you’re worried about having your heart broken over an accidental mishap,
don’t
use glasses or dishes that are beloved heirlooms, or vases so valuable that a guest couldn’t possibly afford to replace one if he breaks it.
The truly good host is gracious and unflappable, no matter
what
happens. This is where a sense of humor and an awareness that “stuff happens” come in handy. So does a supply of OxiClean and paper towels. Stay relaxed and look for creative solutions if an accident occurs. The more you take things in stride and handle them gracefully, the better your guests will feel.
Staying Flexible
It’s not easy to keep calm when you’ve been thrown for a loop, but by maintaining your cool you can turn even the most socially awkward situation into a success. Let’s look at a common scenario: You’ve invited three couples for dinner. The table’s perfect: flowers, place cards, candles—the whole nine yards. You open the door to find that Katherine and Rob have unilaterally taken the liberty of bringing along their friend Jane, who’s visiting. You could say,
(A) “What were you
thinking
, bringing an extra person to my dinner party?! I don’t know how I’m going to cope. My menu, my seating plan—
everything
is ruined!”
And you’ll be absolutely right—because while it’s true that Katherine and Rob never should have brought Jane without asking you first, your reaction has now ruined the evening for everybody.
Or you could say,
(B) “Jane, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m so glad Katherine and Rob brought you along! Let me get you something to drink while they introduce you.”
Make sure your facial expression, tone, and body language match your gracious words or the whole effect will be lost.
Sure, you’ll have to rearrange a few place settings and fiddle with portions, but your gracious welcome has smoothed over what could have been a very uncomfortable moment. In fact, the other guests may not even notice that Jane wasn’t on the original guest list! (By the way, it’s okay to call Katherine and Rob the next day and let them know how much you enjoyed having Jane at the party, but that if this kind of situation comes up again, you’d really appreciate a call ahead of time.)
Friends Don’t Let Friends...
The one thing you can’t ignore is a guest who’s over the limit. First, stop serving him alcohol, and second, take away his car keys. Offer a bed or a couch for the night or take on the responsibility of seeing Mr. Not-So-Sober safely home—but whatever you do,
never
let him drive. And remember, calling a cab or asking a friend to take the drunk person home only makes him someone else’s responsibility.
FHB: Three Magic Letters
Sometimes, for whatever reason—extra guests, a dish that didn’t make as much as anticipated, a potluck that’s long on salad and short on entrées—a host realizes there isn’t quite enough food. FHB stands for “Family Hold Back.” Whispered to your immediate family, it’s a secret signal that they should either take a mini portion of whatever’s in short supply or wait until all the guests have been served.
CONTINGENCY PLANS
Some guests are late
Wait 15–20 minutes, then start without them.
A guest breaks or spills something
Smooth over the incident and clean the mess up quickly. The guest should apologize and offer to do what he can to resolve the situation—but if he doesn’t, chalk it up to the cost of entertaining a less-than-considerate guest.
A guest makes an ethnic slur or an offensive joke
Interrupt and change the subject, or ask for his help in another room, where you can tell him that his off-color jokes or remarks are making others uncomfortable. Be sure to apologize privately to anyone who might have been offended.
Unexpected guests show up at your door
Greet them graciously and do your best to include them. Set extra places at the table if possible (even if your place settings aren’t an exact match). If all else fails, eat on laps in the living room.
A guest has had too much to drink
Cut off the alcohol and take away the car keys. Offer him a place to sleep for the night or drive him home yourself.
There’s not enough food
Plate the food, using smaller portions of what’s short and larger ones of what’s in good supply. Augment the salad and add bread if possible. Signal “FHB” (Family Hold Back) to family members.