Highland Shadows (Beautiful Darkness Series Book 1) (10 page)

“Ask me the same question,” she said.

His arms dropped to his sides. “Tell me what ye see?”

She took a deep breath, squaring her shoulders. “Beyond the courtyard and the gate, beyond the outer wall and the curve of the road, beyond the hills that rise and fall and rise again, atop that most distant slope, I see a rabbit nibbling on dried grasses, poking up through the frost.” She felt him stiffen at her side. “I see the tracks of deer that ventured out into the open during the night to graze at the edge of the forest.”

She glanced up at him and watched his eyes narrow at he stared hard at the tree line in the distance. She shook her head, realizing he had barely begun to understand the woman he had married. “I see tracks from wolves that followed the deer in the night and attacked. The snow bears the stain of blood. I can still hear their howls echoing in my mind, calling to the wolf within me. It never sleeps. ‘Tis forever poised and ready to break beyond my control. It merely waits for me to feel.”

“Feel what?” he asked.

“Anything.” She gripped the window ledge. “Happiness, excitement, anger, sorrow, passion, fear. The emotion itself does not matter. ‘Tis the intensity that counts. If I feel too strongly, I can lose myself.”

He swung her around to face him. “The thought of that pain claiming ye again as it did last night makes me crazy. Does it hurt ye like that every time?”

She shrugged. “It doesn’t have to. It only hurts if I fight it. My bones snap one by one. But I can change in a flash, if I do not resist.”

She could feel her heart begin to race. Sweat beaded her brow. She hasten over to the fire. “I’m sorry, but I cannot take the heat.” She knelt and smothered the flames with her hands.

“What are ye doing?” He rushed to her side and dropped to his knees, cradling her hands. She looked up at him and met his astonished eyes. Her skin was smooth and unblemished.

A smiled tugged at her lips. “It takes more than a small fire to hurt me.”

He thought of that first night after setting out from Dun Brae Castle when they had sought shelter from the night. She had tripped, cutting her arm and refused his care. Now, he at last understood why. Her body had already begun to heal. He glanced down at his chest. The claw marks from the night before had grown faint.

“Remarkable,” he breathed. He led her back to the window just as an icy breeze rushed inside. Returning to the hearth, he grabbed one of the large chairs.

“Sit,” he said, placing the chair down in front of the window. Then he turned away, crossing back to the hearth to fetch the other chair, but he froze. She was there waiting for him. His eyes darted back to the window where he had left her, and then he met her gaze once more. “But...” he began.

Another impish smile played at her lips. “Let me help ye.” She grabbed the chair by the arms and lifted it off the ground. His mouth dropped open as she carried the heavy chair with greater ease than even he had. He was tall with the sinewy brawn of a trained warrior. She was petite and delicate, and apparently, stronger than him. He studied her while she sat down before the window and closed her eyes, reveling in the cold breeze. He shook his head in wonder. Angel, wolf, healer—there was no limit to her depth, and amid a world so wicked, he thought that rather fine. Wrapping his shoulders in a blanket, he sat beside her. Questions weighed heavily on his mind, but he held his silence.

“I am better,” she said at last. “Now ye can ask the question that burns on your tongue.”

“Were ye born this way?”

She shook her head. “I came into this world the normal way and lived an ordinary life until that day, long ago it seems now, when I was traveling home with my sister and mother from Inverness.”

“I did not know ye were with them,” he said.

“Aye, I sat beside my sister, Isabel, in the carriage.” A wave of sadness rolled off of her tongue when she spoke her sister’s name. It settled in the air around them like black fog. “We were just ten at the time. She was my twin.”

Was
.

The simple word struck his heart. “Tell me,” he said.

 

~ * ~

 

She tore her eyes away from the distant, blood-stained hill and looked at Alex. His heart was wide open. She took a deep breath. He deserved the truth. Closing her eyes, she allowed the pain to come to the fore as memory of that day crossed into the open...

Isabel’s golden head rested in Cora’s lap. Their mother sat across from them, poised and proper despite the heat and late hour. Cora absently fingered her sister’s thick golden braid as she turned to stare out at the moonlit countryside. They had passed several weeks in Inverness visiting father’s sister. William had chosen to stay behind not wishing to travel during the warmest summer month. Cora’s finger pulled at the wimple fitted around her head and at the long wool sleeves covering her arms. She decided then that her father had made a sensible choice. She longed to be home in her room where she and Isabel might strip down to their kirtles and sleep.

A horse and rider suddenly blocked her view of the shadowy hills. Cora leaned out the window and peered up at her favorite guard, Robert.

“How are ye managing with the heat?” he asked.

“I would fair better astride a horse and in the fresh night air than closed up in here,” she said, but from the corner of her eye she saw her mother frown. Somehow Kathryn bore the discomfort of travel far more graciously than either of her daughters.

“Is there still much ground to cover?” Cora asked.

Robert’s warm, brown eyes glinted with mischief. “Do ye wish me to tell ye the truth, or would ye prefer I lie and say Dun Brae Castle is just around the next bend?”

She was about to ask him to tell her another of his adventurous stories to help her rest when all at once his countenance changed.

“Get down,” he hissed. He reached inside and yanked the curtain in place over the window.

A horseman on the other side of the carriage did the same. The thick velvet blocked the lantern light. Trembling in the darkness, she held her breath and listened. A bloodcurdling scream rent the air. The carriage skidded to a halt. Suddenly, vicious growls surrounded them, raging over the guards’ cries for mercy. Isabel jerked awake and locked eyes with Cora. She clasped her hands over her mouth. “God save us.”

The carriage shook. Kathryn reached for her daughters, but an unseen force ripped the door off its hinges. A guard fell face down on Cora’s lap. She gasped at the raw, bloody holes where his arms used to be. Isabel screamed. Cora shoved at the corpse, pushing it onto its back.

“Robert,” she mouthed the word, staring down into his lifeless eyes. Her mother’s arms came around her. She squeezed Kathryn’s neck, hiding her face from the horror. Screams and howls blasted her ears. Her heart pounded. She dared peek out just as a shadow with unnatural speed flashed inside and snatched her sister away. Kathryn shoved Cora back and lunged after Isabel, falling from sight. Cora seized, the breath sucked from her lungs. She flailed her arms, reaching for her mother. But she was gone. Cora couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t scream. Her heart lodged in her throat. The carriage jumped forward. She grunted, thrown back against the seat. She scurried from the cushion, stepping on Robert’s lifeless body, and leapt from the carriage, plunging into horror.

She hit the hard ground. Fear seized her soul. She willed her eyes to open and her feet to stand. Wolves fed on carnage that had once been their guard. Gagging, she turned away, only to lock eyes with a man feasting upon the neck of a wriggling guardsman. She opened her mouth to scream but bile poured forth. He dropped the drained guard and started toward her. His eyes gleamed with an inhuman light. She could not breathe. Her legs trembled. He pointed at a bloody heap in the snow. Isabel. Her heart seized. Feet away, was her mother. She collapsed to the ground, gripping her head in her hand and prayed for death.

Then a growl, thick and low sounded behind her. She whirled around. A monstrous gray wolf with thick fur and a wide chest bared his fangs at her. His hot breath stung her face. It lunged at her, knocking her back onto the ground. Sharp fangs sank into her neck. Fire ignited her veins, burning a venomous path throughout her whole body. She cried out against the agony, begging God to take her. Her blood burned. But God did not come—the man did. His green eyes blazed. He laughed, and she caught sight of his sharp, blood slick fangs. She flung her arms over her face…

She struggled to resurface through the memories. “He vanished. Another carriage with a team of horses had come around the bend, chasing away the demons. I lost consciousness then and woke up in my room without a mark on my body, but I knew straightaway I was different.”

He leaned forward, his eyes rapt. “The gray wolf was like ye, but what of the other creature? Was he like ye?”

She shook her head. “He was different, altogether different. I don’t know what he was. But I can tell ye, he was evil to the core.” A mirthless laugh tore from her lips. “Who am I to talk?” She rose and grabbed her kirtle, jerking it over her head.

He wrapped one arm around her waist and crooked his thumb beneath her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. “Ye’re a soft lass. I can tell. I see it in your eyes.”

Brows drawn, she shook her head. He glimpsed her lips, squeezed tight, in the instant before she dipped her head in an obvious attempt to avoid his gaze.

“The hour grows late. We slept the day away. Let us go downstairs. Things will be clearer on a full stomach.”

She stiffened in his arms. “I cannot.”

“Try,” he said. “I’ll be with ye.”

“I’m an animal, and I belong in a cage.” She stormed back toward the window.

“That is not true.” He fought to keep his temper in check.

“What will happen if I cannot control it? What will your people do if they know ye married a woman cursed? I know what they’ll do. They’ll shriek with terror, and pray I’m swallowed alive by the fires of hell.” Heat blazed off of her body in great waves. Her canines sharpened as her chest heaved. Then she stepped back and closed her eyes. After several moments, she looked up. Her teeth and eyes appeared normal, and he knew she was back in control.

“And they would not be wrong to fear me, for if I wanted I could rip out their throats, and there would be nothing to stop me.”

“But ye wouldn’t do that,” he said. He ached to go to her, to shield her from her fear. “Ye couldn’t.”

Her nostrils flared. “I could, and I have.”

CHAPTER 11

 

Alex sat down on the bed. Cold claimed him without her protective heat, but he ignored the chill creeping into his limbs as he studied his strange wife. She turned from the window and pressed her back against the castle wall and slid to the ground, hugging her knees tight.

“I am twenty,” she said, her voice hollow. “A woman now, but I was just a child when we were attacked. For the first year, I remained in my room. Grief consumed me. Without my mother I was terrified, and I suffered. But the loss of my sister, my twin, hollowed me out. When Isabel died, a part of me that had been entwined with her within the womb also died.

“Months passed in a haze of pain, and then one day, my father came to me. He said enough was enough and drew open the window, inviting sunshine into my room. Then he threw my somber tunics out into the courtyard and told me to dress for the evening meal. He said I was to wear yellow to match my golden hair.” She shook her head. “I refused. At that time, I had yet to learn to control my feelings. The heat would come, my heart would race, and if I fought the change, the pain would steal my breath, and I would surrender. I told my father of my fear, that I would lose control. He placated me and promised all would be well. I allowed him to sway me though I knew even he did not believe his own lie.”

She stood then and crossed the room and sat next to Alex on the bed.

“And so ye did as your father bid?” he said, hoping she would continue her story.

She nodded. “The hall was teeming with my kin and a company of travelers, who had arrived earlier that day.”

She began unplaiting her long hair. He welcomed her heat and waited patiently for her to continue. When she did not, he asked, “Are ye afraid to tell me that ye lost control there in the hall?”

She shook her head and continued unraveling her hair. “Dinner had gone surprisingly well. I had laughed for the first time in a year. For a moment, I began to believe that my heart could heal and life would go on. I had been a fool.” She trembled. Her fingers moved at a dizzying pace through her hair. Heat poured off of her. “I had grown tired. Despite my pleasure in the evening, I wished to retire. I did not want my father to forbid me from leaving early, so I slipped away. I went up the side stairwell, but my departure did not go unnoticed. A man followed me. I could hear his quickening heartbeat. I could smell his lust. I raced ahead. I could have easily outrun him, but my foot caught on my skirts and I fell. In a moment, he was upon me. I can still smell the stale ale on his lips. He forced his tongue into my mouth. I bit down, not too hard, just a warning, but then he drew his hand back and hit me with such force it snapped my head back.”

Alex watched her fingers start to shake as she continued loosening her hair. “It happened so fast. I drew a deep breath, and before I finished exhaling, I changed. He screamed in terror, and I flew at him. What happened then is a blur.

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