Saving Abel (Rocker Series) (23 page)

“This is for you,” he said. I snatched it out of his hands. Woody was leaning against the wall, feigning indifference. I turned back to Jeremy, only to see the door closing behind him. He left the building. I was holding a note on a napkin. I unfolded it.

Abel,

I don’t fit in your world. I’m not strong enough to try. It’s easier this way. I’m sorry. You don’t know how sorry I am.

~Gia

I reread the five short sentences, hoping they would somehow make sense. But they didn’t. I turned to Woody who was now standing there with Jake and Dave.

“What the fuck does this mean?” I asked no one in particular. Dave grabbed the note. The boys stepped over to have a look. I was in a world of hurt. Was this an “I’m jealous and can’t deal with it tonight!” or a “Later, I’m out.” I fingered for my phone in my pocket, dialing her number. My call went straight to voicemail.

“The trucks’s outside. We’re going out, dude. You’re coming,” Dave said, pushing me out the door towards the truck. I was a complete and utter fucking zombie. This girl was gonna fucking kill me. Just before getting in the truck, I heard a woman’s cackling. I turned to see Morgana in her white convertible Jaguar stopped fifty yards down. She unlocked the passenger door for the skank to get in. They drove off laughing.

“That fucking cunt of your ex,” Jake said, prompting me to get in the car. “If she wasn’t a woman, I’d kick her fucking ass inside out.” He closed the door behind him.

Woody grabbed the bottle of JD, passing it to me. I grunted, swigging straight from it.

“Anyone holding?” I asked. They looked at one another. “Don’t bogart that shit. I need it.” I looked to Jake, whose jaw was working like a marionette.

“Jake, I’m in no fucking mood for games,” I said, deadly serious. Jake slipped the Outterbox off his iPhone to hand me the package of white goodness. I hadn’t done this shit in years. I had given up partying when I had started medication. But tonight I didn’t give a flying fuck.

“Dude, I don’t think it’s such a good idea. You know how you get. Let’s go grab some dinner. Just us.” Dave said, trying to rip the package out of my hand. I thrust my forearm forward to block his efforts.

“Then don’t fucking think,” I said, pouring two bumps on the back of my hand. I snorted one in each nostril, letting my head fall back on the seat. Another swig of Jack coated my throat. The drug dripped down the back of my throat, numbing everything in its path.
Perfect.
I half-listened to their worried conversation about me. Fuck it. Fuck them. Fuck everyone. I was officially checking the fuck out.

We ended up going to the Hookah longue. Ender split, getting a ride from the other driver—which was curious in itself. Why wasn’t he with his boys?
Whatever.

Jake shook me before trying to pry the blow out of my hand. “Get your goddamned hands off me!” I shouted. My fists were flying. Jake, Dave, and Woody sat wide-eyed, looking at me like I had lost my mind. Maybe I had.

“Dude, chill the fuck out. We’re here. You sure you want to go in?” Dave asked, concerned about my state of mind. I didn’t answer. I just tucked the blow into my jeans, then scooted over the seat, getting out of the truck. Dave must have called ahead, because security was outside waiting for us. The line was wrapped around the building. Yeah, someone had tipped off the public. I took my shirt off, handing it to the bald fucker, nodding. He grabbed the tee-shirt with one hand, extending the other to shake mine. I walked past him. Fuck that. I wasn’t shaking shit tonight. They had better leave me to it. I had to sort my shit out. Speaking of sorting, I dialed Gia’s number again.
Nada.
I followed Woody to our table in the corner. We ordered our usual, the pineapple and mint hookah. Since they had taken my bottle of JD away, I ordered another.

“Dude, where’s Ender?” I asked, looking around the club. I didn’t see him. Were they sure we were meeting him here? “Maybe he split with a chick?” I asked. That was highly probable.

The waitress, a pretty petite ginger, came over to take our order, her eyes feasting on my well-honed chest. She pulled her bottom lip into her mouth with her teeth biting down. She was ogling me, memorizing my body like she didn’t want to forget my swells of well-placed muscle.
Damn.

I sat back on the couch, legs spread wide to relax. She stifled a breath of air.

“Doll, you’re getting yourself all worked up over this,” I said, pointing at my dick. “However, this will never be in you. I’ve felt nirvana—tasted it. That’s all he’ll crave from now on.” I rubbed my cock with my hand. Just talking about Gia’s pussy had me ready to bust a nut.

“You’re a real asshole, huh?” She glowered at me. Woody laughed, throwing me back my tee-shirt to put on.

“Aye.” He agreed with her. The boys had a good laugh. She ignored me, taking everybody else’s order. Luckily, Jake ordered a bottle of JD for the table. Thank fuck. I was parched. I needed another hit, too. Reaching into my pocket, I grabbed my new source of nirvana—blow. I used my Black American Express card to chop it into manageable lines. This shit was rocky as hell. I poured a good amount on the table, quickly going to work chopping.

“Dude, you need to be chill. The photogs are around. You can’t spill that shit out for everybody to see,” Jake said, resting his arm across my shoulders. I looked back at his arm and growled. He removed it, frowning. “I’m just looking out for you, Abel. No need to be a prick about it,” he said sincerely.

I realized he meant it. I just didn’t give a fuck about anything at this point. I needed numbness to find me. I needed to zone out and party for a bit. No harm, no foul. The guys moved to my sides, forming a wall. They didn’t like what I was doing, how I was acting, but they didn’t want me to completely fuck up our public image, either. Rock and Roll was stigmatized by drugs. We partied hard. However, we kept it on the Down-low. Getting drunk was one thing, almost expected. Chopping lines in the middle of a club was another.
Whatever
.

Dave had been busy texting someone for the last twenty minutes—no doubt something to do with getting me out of here. When millions were on the line, people sat up, taking notice. I was the face, the brand name of the band. My dudes were gifted, no doubt. However, I was the one who worked the magic on the crowd. Dave placed his phone carefully on the table, watching me intently. I offered him my straw. He declined, as I had known he would.

I snorted two healthy-sized lines and grabbed the bottle of JD off the table. My phone in hand, I waited, scanning the crowd for her. She knew we were here. Maybe she’d come, and give me a chance to explain. I was playing with my lip ring when all at once Woody slammed his fist on the table and jumped to his feet.
What in the fuck
. I got up on my feet, too.

“Fuck me!” he roared, pointing to the back bar on the other side. My eyes followed his finger …

“Motherfucker!” I bellowed. Sure enough, Ender was rubbing Gia’s back while she was wrapped up tightly in his arms. Cindy was doing a shot with one of Ender’s boys from back home that he occasionally flew out. The bouncers moved toward us, looking for signs of trouble. We were roped off in the VIP section.

“What seems to be the problem, Mr. Gunner?” the bald fuck asked.

“The motherfucking problem is, my friend has my girl wrapped up in his arms. Now, he has
me
as
his
fucking problem!” I yelled, while Dave and Jake tried to hold me back. We were causing a big enough scene that people started to take notice.

“How many fucking times do I have to warn this prick? How many?” I asked Woody, then turned to Jake. They said not a word. Their silence told me they acknowledged my rage and agreed that I had a right to it. Ender was asking for it. He not only had Gia, but Cindy, too—which meant he had left the venue with them. My mind was processing these thoughts before my mouth could utter them. When I realized what was up, my rage multiplied ten-fold. I cracked my knuckles and neck, ready to kick some motherfucking Spanish Lothario ass.

“Don’t call my old man to bail me out. You call Chance. Got it?” I told Dave. He nodded.

“Let’s hope it doesn’t come it that, dude.” He grabbed my arm. “Not that I don’t think he deserves some shit for acting like a jerkoff.” I got him loud and clear. Kick his ass, but don’t kill him, don’t break up the band. I was always thinking of the band. This all came down to respect. He was disrespecting me with Gia. He very well knew this girl was under my skin. So what did he do? He fucked with me, through her.

The crowd parted like the Red Sea. That was fucking right: move the fuck out of my way before I ran your asses down. I took long, assured strides across the lounge. Cindy’s eyes were wide with fear. She tapped Gia’s arm. Gia started backing up, with fear in her eyes, too. Ender put his hands in the air trying to deflect my rage. There was no deflecting it. He needed to take it like the scumbag he was. I had warned him.

“It’s not what you think, bro,” he said, backing up against the bar. Now he was corralled. His friend hurriedly pushed the girls out of the way. At least someone had a brain. He knew Ender was gonna get his ass handed to him. The music stopped. People hushed one another. This would surely make the papers tomorrow. It always did.
Fuck it
. I had a point to make. It was time to drive the point home.

“Dude, I swear to fuck I didn’t lay a hand on her. It’s not like that,” he pleaded. My first punch had him doubled over fighting for air. The second punch had his head hitting the bar top. Security, along with my mates, jumped in. Ender was hunched over with one arm wrapped around his stomach, and the other hand massaging his jaw.

“You feel better now?” he huffed. “I’m not going to fucking hit you back. You’re my boy. I wouldn’t do that shit to you.” He straightened his pose, pushing his chest out. That was the Lathario. The motherfucking peacock was going to get all chesty on me. He had a reputation to uphold. There’s no fucking way he’d look like a pussy in front of people.

“She. Is.
Mine
. You don’t
ever
put your filthy fucking hands on what’s
mine
. Ever,” I growled in his face. “If I see you do it again, I will fucking kill and dismember you. I swear to fuck, I will.” I stepped up to him, driving my point into his thick Spanish skull. I meant every word I had said. I would fucking kill the bastard—I would kill anyone who dared lay a finger on her.

“I know, I know.” He surrendered. Imagine that: Surrender surrendering. Never thought I’d see the day. Must have been a cold day in Hell. His eyes never left mine, never hesitating, never blinking. My mind was contaminated with coke. My senses were heightened. My brain was on overdrive. So when Gia turned to run, I was on her quicker than a hooker could drop her panties.

“I don’t think so, Beauty,” I said, throwing her over my shoulder.
Fuck that shit.

“Let me down, you skizzy pervy caveman!” she bellowed, pounding my back with her fists. Cindy moved in front of me, waving her hands like a crossing guard.

“Cindy, I love you, but I will mow your ass down.” I kept walking past her, back to the VIP area. She frowned, moving out of my way. That was a relief. I didn’t need two pissed-off women to deal with. I looked ahead to see Dave wiping the table off with a bar rag. My man! He always had my back. He was always protecting me. I appreciated that, big-time. For that, he deserved a raise. I decided I’d have a talk with him tomorrow about that very thing. Jake had stayed with Ender, whereas Woody, Dave, and the girls were still in VIP.

Gently, I lowered Gia to a standing position. She kept spewing venom from her lips. I asked everyone to leave us for a few minutes. I needed to remedy what had happened—or what she thought had happened—at the after-party.

“Have you lost your fucking mind? Why would you attack your best friend? Why?” she railed. “You’re a fucking brat. If you don’t get what you want, you act like an asshole until you do.” She pummeled my chest. Was I fucked-up enough to actually be turned
on
by this? Because I was—turned on. God help me, I was. “Well, keep acting like an asshole, buddy. You’re not gonna have me. That’s for fuck sure.” She stood with her arms folded defensively across her chest.

“One, I’m not a fucking brat. Two, if anyone puts their hands on you, friend or not, they will eat my fucking fist. Three, I lost my mind a long time ago. Nothing new there.”

I stepped closer, making sure she looked into my eyes. She needed to hear what I was about to say. She needed to understand, really understand, what being mine meant. “You. Are.
Mine.
You understand what that means? Let me break it the fuck down so I’m absolutely-for-fucking-sure. When you signed that agreement, you gave me your mind, body and soul. Your mind will be focused on me, always. Your body will be under, on top, or spread wide open for me—always. Your soul will be intertwined with mine, forming one physical body of unity—always.” My breath hitched with that last sentence. What the fuck was I even saying? Yeah, I thought it. But I never said it aloud. Coke had me spewing my guts, for fuck sake.

She wiped a tear away, looking up at me with the saddest eyes I’ve ever seen—eyes I wanted to see every morning, every night, while I was on this earth. “I will never hurt you, ever. You’re more precious to me than you will ever know. Trust: it goes both ways, Beauty. Trust what I’m saying to you. Let these words work themselves into your heart. Familiarize yourself with that feeling. Because you’re gonna feel a whole lot more than that.”

“What are you saying?” she asked shakily. “How do I know you don’t feel this way for every conquest?” Her eyes welled up again at that mere thought.

“I never believed in fate, destiny, or love at first sight before. I can tell you with 100% certainty I’ve never felt so utterly fucking consumed by a woman in my life. You take the air from my lungs with your smile, leaving me breathless. I feel I’d suffocate without you in my life. I want to bury my secrets in your skin. I cherish your kisses, savoring each one.” I wiped the tears raining down her cheeks with my thumb, then pressed the gentlest of kisses to her lips.