The Way We Were (19 page)

She'd learned early on that he liked to have some kind of project; something to work at when he was on leave. He had terrific vitality and needed to push himself physically, though he wasn't particularly social outside his own close circle of friends. Well, that was fine: so far she'd managed to maintain a fine balance between her own natural friendliness and his reticence, just as he prevented her from being too lazy. Of course, she missed her family in Edinburgh, and the gossip of the staff-room at school, but this move to Tavistock was an exciting new stage in her and Zack's lives together and it was a bonus to have Zack's family near at hand, especially Liv. Right from the beginning she and Liv had got on really well. She'd asked Liv once whether Zack had ever wanted to track down his ancestors; after all, these days it seemed to be a popular hobby. Liv had shaken her head.

‘Zack's an odd fellow,' she'd said. ‘He has these fits of worrying about his genetic inheritance but some instinct tells him that he doesn't want to probe into his past. I asked him about it once and he said he thought it might be divisive and painful, like opening Pandora's Box. He told me very firmly that we are his family, that he knows all he needs to know about Tiggy and his father, and that's that. He's able to compartmentalize it, I suppose.'

Caroline had been able to accept that: Zack was exactly the same with his job and his home life, keeping them very firmly in different boxes as much as he could. Occasionally he might have doubts regarding his abilities but everyone had those from time to time.

‘Anyway' she'd said to him after the trip to Penharrow, ‘I know you're going to be a great dad. We know enough about Tiggy and Tom for you to be confident about that. Tiggy was your mum's best friend, she was Charlie's godmother and she loved children. And she loved your father. That's good enough for me.'

In Brook Street, Caroline stopped to buy a copy of the
Big Issue
and then went into Creber's to choose some marmalade and something delicious for lunch; perhaps a wedge of game pie or some pâté. She was trying to be careful with her diet, though she'd decided not to be too influenced by the shelves of books dedicated to the wellbeing of pregnant women; it was easy to become overwhelmed by so much information. She knew she was lucky to feel so well; being pregnant suited her and she was determined to enjoy every stage.

Outside again, she consulted her shopping list: a birthday card for her brother and moisturizing cream. She crossed the road to Boots the Chemist, where she pottered for some time; she postponed the buying of the card – she'd have a look in Allan Dolan's on the way back to Chapel Street – and decided to take a little rest before walking home.

Splashed with sunshine, the tubs along the edge of the colonnade and the hanging baskets were full of bright flowers; sitting outside Duke's Café, drinking coffee and watching the shoppers passing in and out of the Pannier Market, Caroline sighed with contentment.

By Thursday, when Aunt Em arrived at Penharrow for lunch, Liv was incandescent with fury at Andy's recalcitrance. He stolidly refused to be cowed by her sisterly disapproval, insisting that Cat was a changed being now that she was a sexy, fun thirtysomething. His last email had a finality about it.

To: Liv
From: Andy
We're not kids any more, Liv, and I'd certainly hate to be judged permanently on something I did when I was eight. I expect Zack's forgotten all about it, and anyway Mum always said it was her fault for not telling Zack earlier. Cat's doing brilliantly. She's in futures and earns a packet. We're going to Le Caprice tonight and she's managed to get tickets for
Chicago
. I can't remember when I had so much fun.

Liv had thumped the table with despair and tried to think of a suitable rejoinder. The trouble was that every response that occurred to her would be unreasonable in Andy's eyes: after all, it
was
unfair to judge someone on a childish misdemeanour.

‘But it wasn't just what she did to Zack,' Liv told herself crossly. ‘She was always a beastly child, otherwise we wouldn't have disliked her so much.'

Aunt Em's arrival coincided with two of the visitors leaving amidst cheerful farewells and promises to return. Liv waved a welcome as Aunt Em parked her car and Val came to greet her too, pleased at the visitors' wholehearted approval for all their hard work.

‘It's nice when people are happy,' she said. ‘And I like to think of them coming back again. Makes them seem more like friends than visitors.'

Behind Val, Liv raised her eyebrows and rolled her eyes at Aunt Em, surprised at such a positive reaction, wickedly inviting complicity; Aunt Em resolutely ignored her and smiled warmly at Val.

‘I'm so pleased that it's going well,' she said. ‘I'm sure it will be very rewarding once you've ironed out all the small starting-up problems. It's such a fabulous location. Of course people are going to love it. They'll come back year after year.'

‘Well done, Aunt Em!' Liv said approvingly, as Val went back to the house. ‘That's the stuff to give the troops. Of course, it'll only last until we get the next problem but it's good to see her smiling. You did well. Very convincing. I almost believed it myself.'

‘You sound jaded,' complained Aunt Em. ‘Almost cynical. I thought you said she needed encouraging.'

‘Oh, she does,' said Liv. ‘Lots of encouraging. I'm not really jaded, I'm just having a run-in with Andy and it's getting me down. Come and see Debs. She's made that Mediterranean vegetable lasagne you so enjoyed last time you were here so I hope you're feeling hungry.'

Debs was delighted to see Aunt Em; she was clearly touched that Aunt Em remembered the names of her children and their various histories, and bridled with pleasure at the reception the lasagne was given.

‘Careful, Aunt Em,' Liv murmured, as Debs turned away to serve two generous portions. ‘If you carry on with all this goodwill you'll do yourself a mischief.'

‘You're asking for a smack,' Aunt Em told her, as they took their plates to a table by the window. ‘I recognize this mood of old. In a minute we'll have “pee po piddle bum” and toys all over the floor.'

Liv laughed. ‘You are so right,' she agreed. ‘I'd simply love to go into orbit and do the whole bit. Isn't it tiresome when you're supposed to be grown up and you can't just let it all rip?'

‘Poor Liv' Aunt Em was eating with relish. ‘This is very good. But what has Andy done to incur your wrath?'

‘It sounds silly, really' admitted Liv. ‘You'll think I'm crazy to get so upset just because he's met up again with the wretched Cat and seems to be falling for her. It is crazy, isn't it? Do you remember Cat, Aunt Em?'

‘Oh, yes,' said Aunt Em. She seemed to have lost her appetite though she finished the last few forkfuls. ‘I remember Cat very well.'

‘Well, then.' Liv's tone implied that nothing more need be said. She finished her own lunch and glanced curiously at Aunt Em, who was sitting silently staring at nothing in particular. ‘He says it's all such a long time ago that she was so beastly to Zack, and I take his point, but we never liked her. And Mum never liked Angela, did she?'

‘No,' said Aunt Em. ‘No, she didn't.'

‘Well, then. I'm just so cross with him. It's disloyal, and now he's talking of her coming down to Cornwall and dropping in on us. He must be out of his mind. Anyway, that's why I'm in a bate. Oh, here's Chris.'

She brightened, moving her plate a little to the side, her volatile mood enhanced by his presence; she had the urge to be really outrageous just to make him laugh but reluctantly abandoned the idea. Aunt Em's unusually thoughtful expression dampened her spirits a little.

‘I've just come to say hello,' he said, ‘not to interrupt anything. Are you well, Mrs Bodrugan?'

‘Very well, thanks.' Em smiled up at him. ‘Penharrow seems to be going from strength to strength. You must be very proud. Are you having some lunch?'

‘Val's getting us something.' He shifted, pushing his hands into his pockets, as if he were deciding whether to sit down beside Liv ‘Just a sandwich or some soup.' Still he hesitated. ‘We've got a busy afternoon, actually, so I suppose I'd better get on.'

‘You do that,' said Liv cordially. ‘Hurry away. Mustn't keep Val waiting.'

He looked confused, even slightly irritated, smiled again at Aunt Em and went out. Liv drummed a little tune on the table top and pulled a face. Aunt Em watched her sympathetically.

‘Shall we go for a walk along the cliffs?' she suggested. ‘Then you can have a really good scream.'

Liv burst out laughing. ‘I don't know what's wrong with me,' she said.

‘Don't you?' asked Aunt Em drily.

Liv stared at her, the laughter dying out of her face. ‘What do you mean?' she asked almost fearfully. ‘I told you I'm all wound up about Andy.' She looked away from the older woman's direct gaze. ‘It's Andy' she repeated. ‘Never mind. Let's have some pudding.'

Later, in Liv's flat, Em made up her mind. The mention of Cat's name at lunchtime had had a surprising effect upon her; a stomach-churning anxiety out of all proportion. This sense of unease, combined with Liv's behaviour, forced her to a resolution. Nervously she prepared herself, assembling her thoughts, formulating sentences in her head, waiting for the right moment.

‘We'll have coffee at my place,' Liv had said. ‘Debs is a terrific cook but the coffee isn't as good as mine.'

So now here they were, Liv putting the pot down beside her and pushing a pretty, fragile mug towards her. Em straightened her spine and took a steadying breath.

‘I couldn't sympathize more with your reaction to Andy's news,' she began. ‘I feel exactly the same myself about Cat. Odd, isn't it? Of course, I can't help being prejudiced against the child because of my dislike for her mother.'

‘For Angela?' Liv looked alert. ‘I know Mum never liked her. It seemed to be a family thing, didn't it? Was there a particular reason?'

‘Oh, yes,' answered Em bravely, heart hammering. Angela tried to break up your parents' marriage.'

Liv sat down, holding her coffee, looking shocked. ‘Did she? But how? Weren't they all old friends? I seem to remember Angela and Cat from the earliest time of my life.'

‘Angela and your father were very old friends. They went out together before he met your mother.'

‘Really?' Liv was very interested. ‘I didn't know that. What, really seriously?'

‘Seriously enough to make Angela pretty cross when Pete dropped her for Julia. She never forgave him and she never let him forget it either. She made your mother very unhappy. At one point I feared that Angela would succeed in driving your parents apart.'

‘But when was that?' Liv looked almost frightened; her safe, secure vision of her family was being threatened. ‘Dad never would have left Mum for Angela.'

Her voice was almost contemptuous but underneath Em could hear the tremor of anxiety.

‘Angela was clever,' she answered. ‘She knew that Pete felt guilty for dropping her and she played on it. Julia was jealous, insecure, and Angela played on that too. I feared her and disliked her. The odd thing is that I felt – feel – exactly the same about Cat, though I don't know why, except that she is her mother's child – and for the way she treated Zack, of course. But that was a long time ago.'

‘That's what Andy says. And, anyway, Mum always says that she's to blame, really, for not telling Zack earlier.' Liv was silent for a moment. ‘I didn't know that about Dad and Angela,' she said at last. ‘Do you think I should tell Andy? Do you think it would put him off Cat?'

‘No, I don't,' said Em at once. ‘Andy might tell her the story and I think that would be wrong.' She frowned. ‘I said that quite instinctively' she said. ‘Why should I think it might be dangerous to tell Andy?'

‘Maybe you think it would give Cat extra ammunition?' suggested Liv.

‘I think that Andy's sympathies are going to be biased towards Cat,' said Em thoughtfully. ‘If he's falling in love with her then he will want to exonerate her – and Angela – from any suggestion of bad behaviour. There must be no excuses for them to feel like star-crossed lovers. That's so dangerous. Cat will simply use everything he tells her as a weapon if she can. Oh dear.' She shook her head. ‘How vindictive that makes me sound. Why should we think that Cat has any axe to grind? Perhaps I shouldn't have told you either, Liv. I just felt that forewarned is forearmed – or something like that. You must keep it as a confidence. Promise?'

Liv nodded. ‘Promise. I'm glad you're on my side, though. Shall I say anything to Mum about Andy and Cat?'

‘Perhaps not just yet. It might so easily be a flash in the pan, mightn't it? Perhaps give it a week or so and see what happens.'

‘OK. Of course, he might tell Mum himself if it gets serious. I'll wait a bit, I think. It's different now I know about Angela.'

Em glanced at her watch. ‘I think I should let you get back to work, don't you? I shan't be so welcome next time if I take advantage.'

She drove away, aware of Liv's preoccupation, still anxious; had she had the right to tell Liv about Angela and Pete? She realized that her message had become confused and she suspected that Liv was far more concerned with the involvement between her father and Angela than with the warning that Em had intended.