Timothy 01: Timothy (7 page)

“
How many?” I asked pointing to the upstairs of the church.

Anna began to back up, she hadn’t been expecting this new development.

“
Anna,” I croaked. “If you want to live, how many?”

Who the fuck believes a six foot five shit-and-gore covered talking clown zombie? A desperate, selfish woman, that’s who.

“
F-f-five,” she stammered out quietly. “You’ll let me go.”

“
I’ll let you go.”

‘
To meet your maker, if such a thing exists.’

She seemed pretty damned pleased that she had made a deal with me to save her own pathetic life, regardless of the fact that five others would have to pay the price for it.

‘
Eat!’ Hugh demanded.

‘
No shit, you gluttonous fuck! I’m working on it.’ That seemed to keep him quiet for the immediate moment. ‘Now this is what is going to have to happen.’ I laid out a plan for my carnivorous pal. He seemed to understand, as long as the pay-out involved meat he was good to go. Who knew zombies could adhere to the Adkins diet so well? Hugh would probably kill me if I made him eat broccoli.

“
Anna, you all right down there?” a voice called out in the darkness. Shit, I was halfway up the stairs and with only one arm and my teeth as weapons I was vulnerable as hell. ‘Anna, stay true to your normal self preserving self.’ I screamed in my head.

There was an extremely long pause as for maybe the first time in her life Anna thought about someone else besides herself. Although that was maybe only half the truth, it was going to be who was going to better serve her needs. Oh I knew all about pretty women, the vast majority have never had to work for anything in their worthless lives. Look pretty and spread their legs and the world was theirs for the taking. I envied them for the ease with which they walked through life and loathed them at the same time. Oh yes, I was going to savor devouring her, if only she would stay true to form.

“
Red…” she started. I was turning around—this wasn’t looking good all of a sudden.

Red must have sensed something in her voice; I could hear him moving to come to her. Fuck, not much chance he was going to miss me in the middle of the staircase, not like I was going to blend in with the somber surroundings.

‘
Hugh, let go of the legs!’ I yelled it so loud and maybe he could sense how close to disaster we were or at least how close I thought we were, but from the time of my request and his release it was seemingly a non-existent span. I ran up the remaining stairs. Red was just approaching the threshold, his rifle down by his side, it was long milliseconds that he took to recognize the threat fast approaching. He wasn’t quick enough as I grabbed him around the neck with my right arm and pulled him close to rip his cheek off, careful to keep an increasing pressure on his neck so that he couldn’t scream. He squirmed worse than a greased eel but I could bench close to six hundred pounds; he wasn’t going anywhere soon. I lifted him higher and started tearing a shred of flesh from his chest, I had never in my life tasted a meat so juicy and succulent, the t-shirt he was wearing not hindering my eating experience in the least, must have been cotton.

Red’s struggling peaked as I lifted him higher and tore into his sweet meats but began to come to a ceasing really quick as I tore his testicles off. A couple of days ago I would have told you that it was impossible for a human to tear through blue jeans with only their chompers but now I could say firsthand that is not the case. Although whatever Hugh was, human was not among the adjectives. Red became a ragdoll in my arms, as his life left so did his taste. Hugh and I were of the same mind that it was time to move on. I threw what remained of Red down to the bottom of the stairs, he landed considerably lighter than when he had originally alit them. Still, that bump in the night did not go unnoticed.

‘
Gotta be more careful,’ I thought as I dragged the back of my hand across my face, spreading gore more than doing anything to get rid of it and that was actually alright with me.

“
Did you hear that?”

“
I didn’t hear shit, shut the fuck up, I’m exhausted.”

“
Both of you shut up. Charlie you heard it; go see what it was.”

“
Who’s coming with me?”

“
Oh fucking pull your panties out of your snatch and go see,” the first person that had spoken to Charlie replied.

“
Maybe I didn’t hear anything,” Charlie muttered.

“
Go fucking check it out or I’ll shoot you myself, you sniveling little bitch.” the third voice said.

He must be the leader. He needed to die quickly.

“
Wait,” a new voice chimed in. “Do you smell that?”

“
Yeah it smells like zombies, if you haven’t noticed, they’re all around us,” second man said.

“
No shit, but this is stronger,” fourth said.

“
Like they’re closer,” Charlie piped up. I could tell from the sound of his voice that he was backing away from the stairs. The
flight response
was strong in this one. I heard at least two rifles come to the ready, maybe three.

“
Help,” I gurgled out, blood and viscera coating my vocal chords, my plea seemed to come out from under water.

“
Who the fuck is that?” second asked.

“
What
the fuck is that?” third asked.

“
Has he been bitten?” Charlie asked.

Three men peered down the stairs at me.

“
Friend, I want you to come up slowly, hands stretched high.”

I started to swallow quickly trying to force the meat and small bits of bone down. If I was going to pull this off I needed to sound somewhat normal.

‘
Hugh I need my other arm.’ Hugh acquiesced; I didn’t realize it then but I had control of nearly my entire body but all I could think about was that I needed to survive the next five minutes so that I could feast to my heart’s content.

“
Ooooweee, what the fuck are you, boy?” the leader said as I stepped up to the top of the stairs and into a small pool of lantern light. I held my hands up.

“
Fucking shoot him,” second said. “He ain’t human.”

“
Please,” I said. It wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t horrible, either.

“
Boy, you look like you came through the wrong end of a meat grinder,” the leader said without mirth. His rifle never wavered from the top of my head.

“
This is the only way I could get past them,” I said pointing to all the blood on me.

The leader motioned to me to put my hands back up.

“
Sorry,” I told him.

“
He don’t look right,” Charlie said from behind the leader.

“
Even if he’s human, which I’m not convinced.” Third said. “He don’t feel right.”

“
What’s your story?” the leader asked me.

Hugh was literally shaking with the desire to move into action, I was struggling to keep him reigned in and still act good enough to keep us from getting shot. Something was going to have to give soon.

“
Son, I asked you a question.” The leader pulled the hammer back on his lever action rifle.

It just came to me, I don’t know if I thought it or Hugh did, but it was going to buy me some precious seconds. “If you smell like them they won’t try to eat you.” That sounded plausible enough to me.

“
Fuck, I think I’d rather die,” second said, turning his head and holding his nose.

“
Looks like you may have taken it a bit too far,” the leader said. He wasn’t buying it.

“
The asshole is bigger than the jolly green giant,” fourth said.

“
Fred, I think you should just shoot him,” second said to the leader.

“
Shut up, Zak. I can’t just shoot him yet.”

“
Merle, check his pockets for some ID,” Fred said to fourth.

“
Not fucking likely, Fred,” Merle answered in no uncertain terms. “I read
IT
and this one is way scarier than the one I imagined in my head.”

“
I’ll check him after you shoot him, maybe,” Zak said and he wasn’t kidding.

“
Boy, you don’t look good,” Fred said.

“
I’m covered in blood, shit and body parts from my neighbor. How do you think you’d feel?” I told him.

“
Fair enough,” Fred answered. “Why the clown outfit?”

“
I wanted to blend in with the circus going on out there,” I told him.

Fred actually laughed at that. “I still don’t trust you much and if I weren’t a God-fearing man locked in a church I think I’d rather send you on your way. But that is not the Christian thing to do.

“
No way you’re letting that animal stay here,” Zak said.

“
He can take your place,” Fred said.

“
Can I put my arms down?” I asked.

Fred nodded.

“
Fred, what the hell are you doing? He’s not human!” Merle said.

“
Well he’s not a zombie, either. Have you heard any of them down there asking for help?” Fred shot back. “Listen, friend.”

“
Timothy.”

“
Timothy, you smell to high Heaven, no pun intended. There is a bathroom and a small shower which you might be able to just squeeze in. I think your look and your smell are keeping the rest of our merry band from seeing the person beneath. If you clean up some I think we might be able to move further in our goal toward trust. Charlie, Merle, why don’t you two escort him to where it is.” He said it in a way that left no room for debate. Charlie looked chagrined and Merle looked pissed.

I was to have an armed escort to the bathroom. Fine, two was better than four. I turned to head down the stairs once I hit the first landing and turned ninety degrees to go down I would be able to make out the huddled form of the fifth holdout right where I had tossed him. My two compadres were well behind me and my bulk would ensure that they would not spot him as we descended, but a moment of action was close. As long as it wasn’t Fred, that was good, he seemed like the type that could shoot the wings off a fly while galloping on horse back.

This was not going to be easy. Merle was first behind me but he was getting too close and dammit if I couldn’t almost feel the muzzle of the barrel pointed at my back. Could I take a hit in the back? I mean if he severed my spine would Hugh be able to do anything to get me upright again, especially in the few moments it would take for him to do anything.

I descended the stairs my brain working feverishly to come up with something that didn’t involve me lying in a pool of my own filth as opposed to wearing it. I got to the first landing, I don’t know if the moon was rising in the sky or Anna had lit some candles but the lower floor had more light than I remember and my last edible tidbit was clearly visible from where I stood. “Hey, there’s something down here,” I said looking back at Merle.

“
Well, what is it?” he asked with concern.

“
How the hell should I know?” I told him.

“
Go check it out,” he motioned with his gun.

“
No way, man. I don’t even have a gun,” I told him.

“
What the hell is the hold up?” Charlie asked Merle as he caught up.

“
Fuckin’ clown says there’s something down at the bottom of the stairs.”

“
Well, go check it out,” Charlie told me over Merle’s shoulder.

“
He says he’s not gonna because he doesn’t have a gun,” Merle answered for me.

“
As big as you are and you’re a chicken?” Charlie asked with malice.

“
Fuck you. You have a gun and I don’t see you in any rush to go see what it is,” I snarled.

“
Who’s missing from upstairs?” Charlie was asking more of himself than Merle.

“
I haven’t seen Ben for hours and Red, I don’t know I was dozing off. You think they’re pulling a train on that Anna chick because I’d like to get in on some of that,” Merle sneered.

“
Yeah, end of the world and Sister Anna wanted to go out with a bang,” Charlie said mockingly.

‘
A nun?’ I thought. God, that sounded so tasty, so fresh. Her meat was going to be so sweet!

‘
Hungry!’ Hugh demanded.

‘
Me too, little buddy!’ I told him.

I could see the equations working in Charlie’s head. Do I give the clown a gun or do I go past him and see what is causing this traffic jam. Both had inherent dangers built in, so he did the next best thing. “Merle, go check it out.”

Merle was about to protest.

“
Girls, what the hell is the problem!” Fred yelled down in a loud whisper but with force.

Merle talked first hoping to get his point across. “Fucking clown says there’s something downstairs but the pasty pansy won’t go check it out because he says he doesn’t have a gun and Charlie said I should do it instead, but I don’t want to go past the freak.”

“
Is it moving?” Fred asked. I shook my head and Merle relayed the message.

“
Tell the clown to do it or you’ll shoot him,” Fred said.

I couldn’t see Fred from this vantage point but I wanted to make sure he heard me. “Not very Christian-like,” I told him.