0215543001348293036 vaughn piper oshea m.j. (6 page)

I was stuck. So I did what my mom always used to do when she was frustrated about something. I cleaned. Guess I managed to learn one thing from her—well, two, actually. I avoided all forms of relationships like a pro as well. (I still have no idea how Dusty snuck into my heart.) But truly, cleaning helped me when I felt like I couldn’t control anything else. It might not solve the problem at hand, but at least my apartment would smell nice and fresh when I was done.

I stuck my favorite rainbow headband back on and didn’t even bother changing out of my sleeping shorts and tank. Alice was still, thankfully, passed out, so I started with the kitchen. I turned my music on low. Then, to the beat of “Bad Romance,” I started scrubbing. I cleaned the counters and the sink, organized the fridge, and mopped the floors. When the kitchen was spotless and I’d gone all the way through
The Fame Monster
, I started with the living room. I didn’t want to wake Alice by vacuuming, but there was a ton of dusting, and I hadn’t put leather conditioner on my couch in a really long time.

I had the feather duster out and was sweating and shaking my butt to Ke$ha when my doorbell rang and nearly scared the heart out of me.

Of course it also set Alice off to screaming at the top of her lungs.

Of
course
.

[32]

one small thing

Damn, damn, damn….

I kept lunging back and forth between the door and her nursery, unsure of where to go first. I’m sure I looked like a total lunatic, or maybe Richard Simmons on speed. Luckily there was no one there to see me. I was hoping it was Dust at the door.
Save me, Dust. Please….

The doorbell rang again, and Alice’s screams intensified. I made a quick decision, sprinted to the door and opened it, only to turn without even looking to see who it was and run back into Alice’s nursery for her before she screamed her little lungs the rest of the way out.

When I returned to the living room with Alice, she was crying, her face was hot pink (nearly matched one of the stripes in the headband I had on), and I probably looked about as frazzled as I could without simply exploding. Standing there, clearly about to bolt, was my neighbor. He’d dressed in cargo shorts (oh, darling,
really?
) and an old Beatles T-shirt. I was afraid to look south of his knees. I had a bad feeling I’d find Birkenstocks or something equally wholesome and horrendous.

I was a little bit annoyed just by his face as he stood there looking awkward. Kinda cute in a rumpled, needs-to-be-taken-care-of way, but still annoying. He’d put me in this horrible bind, after all—okay, that wasn’t fair, but still. A boy has a right to get pissy when things don’t go his way.

“Hi… Erik.” That took me a second to spit out. I’d nearly called him Gatorade again. Plus I had to try to sound like I didn’t want to growl.

“Hi, Ruf—I mean Rue.” I’d given him the stink eye. Really.
No
one
called me that. “Um, I’d like to reconsider your offer if it still stands.”

Ohmygodreally?
I tried to stay cool. It was hard not to hug him. I had a feeling that wouldn’t be received very well. “What do you mean, exactly?”

His face turned red. The whole thing was clearly painful for him.

“I’d like to watch the baby—I mean, Alice. If that’s still okay.”

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Piper Vaughn & M.J. O’Shea

“And you can handle her every day from eight until four thirty?” I raised my eyebrow. I was trying really hard not to fall to my knees and kiss his feet. I was so damn relieved. He’d taken the bait. Seven fifty was a lot of damn money, but I’d shell it out with a smile if I didn’t have to send Alice back to that pit of hell.

Erik shuffled his feet on the wood floor. “That’s fine. I work from home.”

I nodded. “Yeah, you’re a writer. I know.” My brain was so mushy from the fallout of all that stressing that I was barely listening to the guy—well, honestly, that was a bad habit of mine anyway. “What is it you write again?” I knew it was something nerdy, but I’d kinda tuned him out the last time we talked. Like I said. Bad habit.

“Science fiction, remember?”

Oh, yeah. Yawn. Like I care about aliens.
“That’s really cool.” I hoped I sounded sincere. Wouldn’t want to piss the neighbor off and make him change his mind about watching Alice.

“So you’d bring her over at….”

“Is quarter to eight okay? I can make it to class on time, then.” I was practically crossing my fingers. I needed this to work out so desperately.

“Yeah, that’s fine. I’m usually up by then. Will you make her breakfast first?”

I nodded, ready to agree to almost anything. “Of course. And I’ll pack all the stuff she needs and give you lots of instructions. And my phone number, and my best friend’s number, and the doctor’s too, of course. Oh, you’ll be totally set up.”

Gatora—Erik just blinked at me, owlish and confused. “Um, okay, so seven forty-five?”

I realized I’d lost him after “of course.” Guess I wasn’t the only one who tuned other people out. It was hard not to smile at his overwhelmed face. “Yeah, seven forty-five.”

[34]

one small thing

“O-okay.” Erik backed toward the door, looking suspiciously at my headband, toenails, and the black sleep shorts smattered with rainbow-colored hearts that I love, love,
loved
. I almost had to laugh.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Erik mumbled before he turned and nearly ran out of my apartment.

I smiled again.
Straight boys….

Erik

I LOOKED at the clock again—7:40 a.m. I’d been glancing at it periodically for the last hour and a half. In five minutes, Rue would be bringing the baby by. And then it would be me and her. For eight hours. Me and a baby. Eight hours.

Maybe I should just go over there and tell him I can’t do it. Head
him off.
I didn’t really need the extra money, did I? My books were going to start selling. My agent would be calling any day with news that my latest manuscripts had been accepted. Right?

I would’ve had an easier time believing it if I hadn’t been waiting for his phone call for a few months already. But, still, it would happen.

I really didn’t need the extra seven fifty Rue was offering. Somehow, someway, I would work it out, regardless.

Yeah, right. That money is the only reason you agreed to do this.

Well… maybe not the
only
reason….

I’d seen my neighbor’s signs around the building over the last few days, of course, and it wasn’t as if I could have missed the pair he’d slipped under my door. I’d been doing a pretty good job of ignoring them, though, even as the amount he was offering climbed steadily higher. I might not have done it even at seven fifty if it hadn’t been for what happened in the laundry room the other morning.

Usually I did my laundry before the sun rose, early enough that most people were probably still in bed. I’d never run into anyone else

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Piper Vaughn & M.J. O’Shea

while I was there, but that day, an older lady I’d never seen before—not surprising, since I didn’t leave my apartment for much—wandered into the room while I was waiting for my final load to dry. She eyed the sign Rue had hung over the washing machine as she stuffed her clothes inside.

“He must be getting desperate,” she said with a laugh. She had the same type of voice my grandmother had, gravelly from years and years of chain smoking. “He’d have an easier time finding someone if he wasn’t so limp in the wrist. A lot of people around here don’t much like queers.”

I just blinked at her. I hadn’t really understood what she meant, but the sneering tone in her voice was hard to miss.

The lady went on before I could even think of anything to say.

“Faggot or not, I might watch the little brat myself for that kind of money.” She laughed again. “Maybe I could even get him to pay me eight hundred.” She turned to look at me then. “What’s the matter with you? Can’t talk?” When I didn’t reply, she slammed the lid of washing machine closed and shook her head. “Bunch of weirdos in this building.”

She left the room, muttering under her breath, and I didn’t waste a second before I took my still-damp clothes out of the dryer and rushed back upstairs. I hadn’t wanted to be there when she came back, but for the rest of the day I couldn’t stop thinking about what she’d said. The idea of her watching the baby even though she thought badly of Rue didn’t sit right with me. It seemed wrong somehow, unfair to both Rue and his daughter.

It had taken most of the night and an hour-long conversation with my mom for me to decide what to do. I still wasn’t comfortable with the idea of babysitting, but it was obvious Rue
was
getting desperate, and there were other people who would use that fact to take advantage.

It was different for him and me. We both needed something, and even without any experience, I was sure I’d probably do a better job taking care of the baby than that rude old woman.

[36]

one small thing

Now I wasn’t so sure. Money or no money, what exactly had I been thinking when I agreed to babysit a newborn? What did I know about babies? Nothing. Less than nothing. And what did it matter if that lady would have taken advantage of Rue? He was a stranger. They both were.

But it wouldn’t have been right.

You can do this
, I told myself.
You can.

I’d spent half the night awake, looking at various baby-related websites, after all, and Rue had stopped by for over an hour to drop off some of the supplies I would need and “check the apartment for safety.” He’d brought the baby with, of course, and insisted I hold her for a while so we could “get to know each other,” watching me like a hawk the entire time. I felt a bit like a mouse being hunted, or a bug under the lens of a microscope, but I supposed I could understand his motives. I’m sure if it had been my mother and me when I was a baby, she would have done the same thing.

While he rambled on, telling me about the baby’s sleeping habits and the way she liked to be bounced when he walked and how many bottles she drank a day, I’d cradled her awkwardly in my hands and stared down at her in silence. I tried to pay attention as he talked, but it was hard when I was so focused on the tiny little weight in my arms. It was probably a good thing Alice had seemed entirely content at the time to lie there looking back at me with her eyes half shut. If she’d started crying again, I might have backed out of our agreement right then and there.

Once he’d gone, I’d fired up my laptop and read up on everything from changing diapers to performing infant CPR. I was pretty sure I had a good grasp on all of the baby care basics. But that didn’t change anything, really. I still didn’t feel ready.

That’s because you’re
not
. Who are you kidding? You can’t do
this. Just march right over there and tell him you changed your mind.

No big deal.

Except I could practically hear my savings account weeping at the very idea of passing up that much cash. It couldn’t be that hard, could it? I’d read that newborns sleep for a good portion of the day. And it

[37]

Piper Vaughn & M.J. O’Shea

wasn’t as if I’d actually have to leave the apartment or anything. So, really, would it be
that
much of an inconvenience?

I hadn’t reached any solid conclusions by the time Rue knocked on my door. Almost immediately my stomach clenched, and my skin felt clammy. I wiped sweaty palms on my jeans and shuffled over.

The moment I opened the door, it was as if I’d unleashed some kind of tornado in my apartment. Rue brushed past me with bags of supplies and the baby’s car seat hanging from his elbow. He set the car seat and a couple of the bags on the floor, and I could see by the baby’s scrunched-up pink face that she was still asleep. That was probably for the best, since he started rambling the second I turned to face him, and I don’t think I could have listened to everything he said if she’d been screaming in the background.

“Okay. So you already have her rocker and some of her toys. All of the changing supplies are in here.” He shoved an overstuffed black-and-pink bag into my hands. “Now, there’s a list with every phone number you should need in there too. My cell, my friend Dusty’s, the pediatrician, my Aunt Elma in Florida…”

I blinked.
His Aunt Elma in Florida?

“…the Poison Control Center, the nursing hotline on the back of my insurance card, my school, and… I think that’s about it. You know the number for the police, right?” Rue paused and sucked in a deep breath.

I opened my mouth to respond, but he was talking again before I could get anything out.

“Sorry. Of course you do.” He gave me an apologetic look and reached up to flip black-and-purple bangs out of his eyes. The purple threw me off. I could’ve sworn those stripes hadn’t been there the day before. “What else, what else? Oh! The instructions for how much formula she needs and how often and when she normally takes her naps are in there too, just in case you forgot. I fed her about half an hour ago, so she’ll probably sleep for a while. Um, this here is her playpen.” He nudged a long, rectangular-shaped bag on the floor with his shoe. “It’s not too hard to put together, and she can take her naps in it, and it has a changing table attached. The instructions are in here with it, but, really,

[38]

one small thing

it shouldn’t take you more than five minutes. I mean, even I can do it that fast, and I’m just awful with tools.”