03 - Sworn (5 page)

“You’re friendly.” He didn’t say it as though it were a compliment. “Get in among the people. Find out what they need, what I can promise in return for their help, what they hate most about Severn.” His voice could have been carved from stone for all the warmth it carried, a sharp turn from the tone he’d taken with the merfolk. “Do whatever they ask of you. Work in the kitchen. Mind their brats. Clean up the stable, if they have one in this godsforsaken place. Try not to draw attention to yourself. It will make them suspicious if they know what you’re capable of. Be who you were before we met. It shouldn’t be difficult.”

She took a step back. A flash of anger crossed her face in the creasing of her brow and tightening of her lips, but she quickly smoothed it away. “Is that all?”

“That’s all.”

She hesitated, and her gaze flickered from him to me. “If it will help.”

I flinched inwardly, but didn’t let it show. It was for the best that she understood what my father was. I suspected she’d seen a kinder side of him when they were imprisoned together. He’d have shown her what she needed to see in order to trust him and work with him, but that wasn’t the Ulric I knew. He would use her as readily as he would me if it meant getting his throne back. For now, he’d decided she needed to be put in her place, and there would be no arguing with him.

Something tugged at my sleeve, and I looked down to find Patience holding a stack of blankets, with our bags slung over her arms.

It was good that I had so much practice at hiding my emotions and reactions, given the shock I felt when I looked at her. It would take a while to get used to the sight of her missing eye, and to the dark fog of sorrow that surrounded her even when she smiled. Strange that I hadn’t felt her coming, though. She had a quiet presence.

“We’re moving some things around, making room for you,” she said. “Guess you’re my guests now. Penelope and Doug and friends.... But those aren’t really your names, are they?”

That surprised me. “Your mother told you who we are?”

“She said you weren’t who you told us you were, but that it was okay. That you were friends. Wouldn’t say your real names, if she knew them. Gimme a hand with this stuff?”

Wonderful friends we turned out to be.
I didn’t normally feel guilty over things that weren’t directly my fault. Until recently, I hadn’t felt much guilt over things that were. Still, my gut wrenched at the thought of what had happened to Patience’s family as a result of our presence among them.

We’d make things right some day. We had to.

“I’m Aren,” I said as I took the blankets from her and the others relieved her of our bags, which looked far lighter than they’d been when we arrived. “That’s Rowan.”

The girl nodded. “I like those names better. Come on. Rowan, I’ve got real clothes for you. Pants and stuff. We get a lot from people on the road, so you all can use what you need.” She gave Rowan’s torn-off skirt a once-over and shook her head in a way that made her look like a tiny, disapproving grandmother. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.”

Rowan hid a smile behind her hand and thanked the girl.

We followed her past the space where a pair of strong young fellows continued their clumsy sparring. Ulric held me back as the others went on.

“Watch,” he said. “Watch all of these people, but start here.”

It was a sad display, all told. I’d never had much enthusiasm for swords, preferring to fight with my magic, but had trained for physical combat. These men had obviously not had the same advantage. Their clumsy motions would have made my old teachers cringe. One lashed out in an uncontrolled swat that landed on his opponent’s arm, thanks more to the other’s incompetence than the attacker’s skill.

The grins on the young men’s faces revealed how they enjoyed the action, and their minds shouted their excitement to me. They’d already become legends in their imaginations, thinking themselves brave knights in the heat of battle, assured of victory. If Ulric told them they would be great warriors, they would surely follow him anywhere.

All I could picture was these heroes lying dead on a field, victims of Severn’s forces and their own incompetence.

We had a lot of work to do if they were going to stand any chance at all.

3

NOX

T
he girl Rowan had introduced as Patience stood still as the birches behind her, watching as we dropped our bags in the tent. A pair of boys about her age ran past, yelling and kicking up dust. They swerved to avoid her as one reached out to pull another girl into their game. If Patience noticed that they overlooked her, she didn’t react.

I tried not to stare at the girl’s injuries, knowing well how sensitive she probably was about them. My own faint scars always set me on edge around unfamiliar people, made me wonder what they were imagining about my past. Her remaining eye was sharp and clear, but carried a distant look even as she focused on the needs at hand. That paired with her dour expression told me all I needed to know about her. That eye had seen things that didn’t bear speaking of. She was bold enough, though. No shy little flower there. She already struck me as the kind of child who would grow up to accomplish great things, as long as no one held her down along the way.

“This all right?” she asked. “I know it’s not much.”

Cassia looked around the peak-roofed tent. Made of stained canvas, it was at least well constructed, with poles in the corners to give the space a bit of height. The space was empty, with a packed-dirt floor. The warm afternoon outside had made the air inside stuffy. “It’s a little tight, but we’ll be fine. At least our bedding will be out of the rain, right?”

Patience wrinkled her nose. “We haven’t seen much of that around here lately.”

A frown twitched at Cassia’s brow. Lack of water was never good news for a mer, but she and Kel chose not to let on what they were to people who couldn’t guess, and she said nothing more about it. “We’re not putting anyone out, are we?”

“Nah.” Patience stepped into the tent. “A couple of the hunters were using it, but they’ve all gone south to look for game. You’ll have to use your own bedrolls, but the space is all yours for now.”

Kel set his bag down and turned around slowly, broad shoulders scraping the sloped roof of the tent as he tried not to bump into Rowan. He looked like a bull trapped in a tiny pen, but he’d make the best of it. We all would. No sense complaining.

“It’s great,” he said, and smiled. Patience blushed. I couldn’t blame the kid if she was already infatuated with him. Though I’d fought hard to ignore it, I’d been attracted to Kel from the first moment he turned that casual grin on me. It had taken longer for me to admit that I was drawn to his mind as much as his body . . . to his kindness, his humor, and the way he accepted me even though he saw straight through to all of my dark places.

I watched the muscles in his arms flexing as he spread out our bedding, the bend of his spine that was far more graceful than should have been allowed for such a broad form.

Gods, that body.
Something I hadn’t yet allowed myself, and a temptation that I thought might drive me mad. But that would just be another step toward being his completely, another knot to tie me to someone I had to be prepared to let go of.

Patience’s whitish eyebrows pulled together, drawing the scar tissue on the left side in tight.

“You guys aren’t going to have enough room for all your beds in here,” she said. “There’s another tent, if someone wants to help me move some boxes out of it. It’s just tiny, room for one bed, but it would make more space in here if someone wants it.”

“Sounds perfect,” Rowan said. She grabbed her bag and Aren’s, and followed the girl out the door. I tried not to be jealous of the fact that they’d have privacy.
Better to have supervision to curb temptation,
I told myself.

“Two down,” Kel said quietly.

Cassia shot her brother an irritated look. “I’m sorry, am I intruding?”

“No,” he said. “You are entirely welcome. But his highness will be an awkward roommate.”

She grimaced. “True enough. Maybe Ulric will talk that Lala woman into finding him a private room.”

“Laelana,” I corrected, and set a few more blankets on top of Kel’s. The bedroll they’d bought for me on our journey had been commandeered by the old man, but thus far Kel had had no problem with me sharing his space. In spite of my conflicted reluctance to move things further, spending nights with our bodies fitted together like puzzle pieces had been both lovely and surprisingly restful.

I fell harder for Kel every day, thawing under his attention. He made me feel warm. Wanted. And I wanted nothing more than to make him feel the same. But I’d been hurt before. I couldn’t give myself over completely only to find myself broken again, and couldn’t risk breaking his heart if I had to sacrifice myself in my personal quest to destroy Severn.

Cassia coughed into the crook of her arm. I’d need to get my supplies back and fix something for her soon. “We’ll fit the three of us in here, but barely,” she said. “Where did Ulric and Aren go, anyway?”

“Probably very important Sorcerer things to do,” I muttered.

Kel snorted. “I know you’re not jealous that Aren gets to spend time with him.”

I gave a dramatic shudder. “Hardly. But it would be nice to be included in whatever’s happening. A few days ago we were all working together. Ever since we added Ulric and Rowan to the group, it seems Aren’s always talking to them.”

Cassia stopped smoothing her thin blanket and sat back on her haunches. “I know,” she said. “Believe me. At least you two have each other now. I’m sort of wondering where I fit into all of this.”

Kel laid a hand on his sister’s shoulder. “Sorry, Cass.”

She smiled sadly. “Don’t be. I’m glad we went with Aren to Darmid. It feels like that part of the journey was meant to be. But much as I agree with what you said earlier, how much good can we really do here?”

Guilt prickled at me deep in my stomach. “You’re not leaving us, are you?” I asked.

In spite of the fact that we’d only known each other for a short time, Cassia was the first real friend I’d had in years. Or ever. Kel was a friend of sorts, but that was complicated. With Cassia, it was just... good. She was nearly as guarded about her emotions as I was, but I trusted her, and I enjoyed her company. I couldn’t say that about many people.

But as I looked down at my things resting right next to Kel’s, and hers spread out on the other side of the tent, I could see why she’d feel left out. She had explained mer ways to me more fully than Kel had, how they weren’t supposed to want the emotional web that Kel and I were weaving, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t lonely.

“We’ll see,” she said. “I need to do what’s best for our people, not for me, and right now getting Ulric back to Luid seems to be what we need to do. Mariana and Arnav will be happier once things are settled. But someone is going to have to report back to them some time and let them know what’s happening in regards to Severn. Maybe there’s even a chance that they’ll help if I ask.”

Kel sighed.

“What?” I asked. He just looked sadly at Cassia.

“I don’t have to say anything about this,” she said softly, and gestured toward our bed. “But they’re going to find out some time, especially if this goes on as I think it will.”

“There’s nothing here you’d have to report about us, right?” I asked. By mer standards of physical affection, Kel and I were barely friends.

Kel stepped into the patch of sunlight that fell through the tent flaps. “There’s more than I’d like the elders to know. They wouldn’t have much of a problem with it if I was tumbling you or any other human in the hay. Even regularly and exclusively.”

Cassia’s lips pulled into a cat-like smile. “No. They would dismiss that as Kel being Kel.”

He narrowed his eyes at his sister. “As if you haven’t had humans in your past.”

She flashed a coy smile, and I remembered that she and Aren had once had a very different sort of relationship from what they currently enjoyed. Even if she had no desire for that now, seeing him with Rowan couldn’t possibly help her feel less like an outsider in the group.

“No,” Kel continued, speaking to me, “it’s the fact that we’re involved in that other way that’s the issue. They won’t be pleased.” He turned toward the doorway. “It’s dry in here. Think there’s anywhere around to swim?”

That was how it always went, especially in recent days on the road. We’d get close to talking about something deeper than our current situation, and one of us would change the subject. We never talked about the future, about him going home, or what would come after our mission was done. I assumed this was because there was nothing to say. Even if he did love me, even if I ever admitted to myself or to him that I felt the same, I couldn’t imagine a future for us.

“There has to be a place to swim nearby,” Cass said. “They wouldn’t have set up a village too far from a water source, right?” We’d managed a few quick dips along the way, but the mers needed far more. She stood and stretched. “Nox, you coming?”

Much as I disliked swimming, joining them would be far better than waiting here for Ulric to come back and order me around. And there were definitely worse ways to spend my time than watching Kel in his natural form. On land, he was indistinguishable from a human man, if a distractingly attractive one, and with better manners than most. I’d been surprised when he first showed me his mer form, and continued to be astounded by how engrossing I found that body when he changed to swim—grayish skin, smooth tail, gill slits and all. Either way, he was Kel, and he was perfect in ways I’d never realized existed.

Cassia stopped a young woman as we stepped out of the tent. “Excuse me, but could you tell me where we might find a lake?”

The woman pursed her lips and looked each of us over in turn. “Nope,” she said, and gave us a strange look. “You let us know if you find one, though.”

Cassia thanked her, and we moved on. Rowan joined us near the kitchen tent. “What’s going on?”