17 - Why I'm Afraid of Bees (8 page)

I headed toward my own house. This time I planned to
make
Dirk Davis
give me my body back. Or else.

As I turned up my street, I suddenly heard a familiar voice coming from
behind a tree.

“Don’t mess with me! Don’t mess with me, man!”

I couldn’t believe it. The voice belonged to Marv. But who was he talking to?

I shot around the tree to find out. To my surprise, I saw that Marv was
talking to me—or, Dirk Davis, in my body. Barry and Karl were right beside
him.

Look out, Dirk! I thought. Run! Run!

Please don’t let them wreck my body!

But I was too late.

Barry, Marv, and Karl were closing in on him, about to give him the pounding
of his life.

I flew closer.

“Look out, Dirk! Look out!” I squeaked.

But to my surprise, the three hulking creeps weren’t moving in on “Gary”—they were
backing away
from him!

“Don’t mess with me!” Marv cried. “I
said
I was sorry.”

“We apologized,” Barry whined. “Don’t hit us again, Gary! Please!”

Karl whimpered behind him, nursing a bloody nose.

“You guys are losers,” I heard “Gary” tell them. “Take a hike. Go get a
life.”

“Okay! Okay!” Marv cried. “Just no more rough stuff, okay, Gary?”

“Gary” shook his head and walked away.

I don’t
believe
this! I thought gleefully. Barry, Marv, and Karl were
afraid of me!

I decided I’d have some fun with them, too.

I swooped down and landed on Barry’s nose, buzzing as loudly and menacingly
as I could.

“Yowwwww!” he shrieked in surprise—and swatted himself on the nose.

I was too fast for him. I was already on Karl’s ear.

Karl cried out and toppled backwards into a thorny rosebush.

Then I buzzed round and around Marv.

“Get away!” he shouted angrily.

And I flew right into his mouth.

His scream nearly deafened me. But it was worth it.

Marv started spitting and choking and gagging.

I flew up into the air, laughing so hard, I nearly popped my antennas. That
was the most fun I’d had since becoming a bee!

I watched the three gorillas run away. Then I flew up the block to my house.

“Gary” had left the window open, and I was able to shoot in. He was lying on
my bed, reading one of my comic books and eating crackers with honey on them.

The honey smelled really good, and I realized I was hungry again. I reminded
myself to stop by a flower and get a snack the next time I went outside.

But, meanwhile, I had work to do. I flew over and landed on Gary’s earlobe.

“Hey, you! Dirk Davis!” I yelled at the top of my little voice. “I need to
talk to you!”

He reached a hand up and flicked me off his face. I fell down and landed with
a bounce on the bed.

I buzzed angrily and shot right back up to his earlobe. “Hey, you! I want my
body back! You have to get out of it. Now!”

“Gary” folded up his comic book and swung it at me. I buzzed with rage and
frustration. I wasn’t going to give up this time. No way! I had to make him hear
me.

I rocketed up in the air and landed on the top of his head. Then I climbed
down to his other earlobe and tried one more time. “I’m not leaving you alone
till you get out of my body!” I screeched. “Do you hear me?”

He sighed and shrugged his shoulders. “Will you
please
quit bothering
me?” he asked. “Can’t you see I’m trying to relax?”

“You can
hear
me?”

“Yeah. Sure,” he muttered. “I can hear you okay.”

“You can?” I was so surprised, I almost fell off his ear.

“Yes, I can hear you perfectly. Weird, huh? I’m not sure why. But I think
some bee cells got mixed up with my human cells during our electronic transfer.
I can hear all kinds of little bug noises now.”

“Your
human cells? Those are
my
human cells!” I cried.

Dirk shrugged.

“Enough chitchat,” I told him. “When do you plan to get out of my body?”

“Never,” he replied. He picked up his comic book and started reading it
again. “I like your body. I can’t understand why you gave it up to go become a
bee.”

“That wasn’t my idea!” I screamed.

“You’ve got a good life here,” he continued. “I mean, you have great parents.
Krissy is an okay sister. And Claus is an awesome cat. Too bad you didn’t know
all that when you were in your body. Which is now
my
body!”

“It’s not your body! It’s mine! Give it back!” I started to buzz furiously
all around his head, swooping down in front of his nose, crashing into his ears,
batting my wings in his eyes.

Dirk Davis didn’t even flinch.

“What’s the matter with you, anyway?” I yelled. “You’re
me
now. You’re
supposed to be scared of bees!”

“Gary” laughed. “You’ve forgotten something,” he said. “I’m
not
you.
I’m just inside your body. I’m still me inside. And I’m not the least bit afraid
of bees!”

“And, now,” he went on, “take a hike, okay? Buzz off. I’m busy.”

Frozen with anger and disappointment, I slumped on the bedspread without
moving. “Gary” raised the comic book up into the air. “I’d hate to swat you,” he
said. “But I will if I have to!”

I dodged away just as the comic book slapped down on the bedspread. Then I
shot back out the window.

For a few minutes, I flew aimlessly around, lost in my sad thoughts. Finally,
I remembered how hungry I was. I perched on top of a big, orange lily blossom
and started sucking up some nectar.

Not bad, I told myself as I drank. But honey on crackers would be much
better.

“What am I supposed to do now?” I asked myself. “Am I really doomed to be a
bee for the rest of my life?” I pulled my head out of the orange blossom and
looked around. “And how long
is
the rest of my life anyway?”

I remembered a page from
The Big Book of Bees.

“The life of the average bee is not very long. While the queen can live
through as many as five winters, the workers and drones die off in the fall.”

In the fall?

It was already nearly August!

If I stayed in this bee body, I had only a month or two at most!

I gazed sadly up at my house. “Gary” had turned the light on in my room, and
it twinkled in the early evening dusk.

How I wished I could be up there! Why, why had I ever been stupid enough to
think I’d be better off in someone else’s body?

Then I heard a buzz. I peered over the blossom. Sure enough, I saw a bee.

He hopped up onto the flower. Two other bees quickly joined him. Then three
more. They buzzed angrily.

“Go away!” I cried.

I tried to fly away.

But before I could lift off, they all swarmed over me.

I couldn’t move. The bees had taken me prisoner.

“Don’t take me back to the hive!” I shrieked. “Don’t take me back!”

But to my horror, they started to drag me away.

I struggled to squirm away. But they turned their stingers on me.

Were they some kind of bee police? Did they think I was trying to escape the
hive?

I didn’t have a chance to discuss it with them. They lifted me up into the
air. There were bees in front of me, bees behind, and bees on all sides.

We flew past my bedroom window. “Help!” I called.

“Gary” glanced up from his plate of crackers and honey. He smiled and waved
at me.

I was so angry, I thought I might explode.

But then an idea came to me. A crazy idea. A desperate idea.

I buzzed as loudly as I could. Then I darted out of line and shot into the
open bedroom window.

Were the others following me? Were they?

Yes!

They didn’t want to let me escape.

“Gary” sat up when he saw me and my buzzing followers. He rolled up his comic
book, preparing to swat us.

I circled the room, and the other bees followed.

“Get out! Get out!” “Gary” screamed.

There weren’t enough of us, I decided. I needed a huge swarm.

I flew back out the window. The others buzzed after me.

Now I was the head bee. As fast as I could, I led my group back to Mr.
Andretti’s garage, and in through the hole in the screen.

I hesitated at the hive entrance. I took a deep breath.

Was I really going to go back inside?

I knew I had no choice. “Go for it, Lutz!” I shouted to myself.

I shot in through the entrance hole.

Then I began flying crazily through the hive, buzzing angrily, bumping the
walls, bumping other bees.

The hive stirred to life.

The buzzing grew to a dull roar. Then a loud roar. Then a
deafening
roar!

Round and round I raged, flying faster, faster, throwing myself frantically
against the sticky hive walls, tumbling, darting, buzzing furiously.

The entire hive was in an uproar now.

I had turned the bees into an angry swarm.

Out of the hive I flew. Out into the darkening evening. Out through the hole
in the screen, up, up, and away.

And the bees swarmed after me, like a black cloud against the gray-blue sky.

Up we soared. Up, up.

A buzzing, swarming funnel cloud.

Up, up.

I led them up to the bedroom window.

Tumbling over each other, raging through the air, we swarmed into “Gary’s”
room.

“Huh?” He jumped off the bed.

He didn’t have time to say a word.

I landed in his hair. The raging swarm followed, buzzing angrily, surrounding
him, covering his head, his face, his shoulders.

“H-help!” His weak cry was drowned out by the roar of the bees. “Help me!”

I dropped down onto the tip of Gary’s nose. “Have you had enough?” I
demanded. “Are you ready to give me back my body?”

“Never!” he cried. “I don’t care what you do to me! You’ll never get your
body back! It’s mine, and I’m keeping it forever!”

Whoooa! I could not believe my ears.

I mean, he was
covered
in bees! And still he wouldn’t listen to
reason!

I didn’t know
what
to do.

The other bees were starting to lose interest.

Some of them drifted to the plate of honey. Most of them floated back out the
open window.

“You can’t get away with this, Dirk!” I screamed.

With a furious wail, I whirled around. Then I stabbed my razor-sharp stinger
deep into the side of “Gary’s” nose.

“Owwwwwww!” He let out a high-pitched shriek and grabbed at his nose.

Then he staggered backwards and fell over onto the bed.

“Yaaaaay!” I cried out in celebration.

For one instant, I felt triumphant.

A tiny bee had defeated a huge enemy! I was victorious! I had won a fight
against a giant!

My celebration didn’t last very long.

I suddenly realized what I had done. And I remembered what happens to a
honeybee after it stings someone.

“I’m going to die,” I murmured weakly. “I stung someone, and now I’m going to
die!”

Weaker.

I felt the strength drain from me.

Weaker and weaker.

“What have I done?” I asked myself. “I gave up my life for the chance to
sting Dirk Davis! Why was I such a jerk?”

I struggled to keep my wings moving, struggled to stay in the air.

I knew I was doomed. But I wanted to stay alive as long as I could. Maybe, I
thought, as I felt my strength fading, maybe I’ll have a chance to tell my
family good-bye.

“Mom! Dad! Krissy!” I buzzed faintly. “Where are you?”

It was hard to breathe. I felt so tired, so weak.

I floated out the window and sank to the grass below.

I thought I recognized the shape of the old maple tree where I used to read
books and spy on Mr. Andretti. But my sight was so bad, it was hard to be sure about
anything. The whole world swirled in gray shadow.

I could no longer hold up my head. The gray shadows grew darker and darker.

Until the world faded completely from view.

I sat up slowly. The ground spun beneath me.

Where was I?

My back yard?

I blinked, struggling to bring it all into focus, waiting for my eyes to
clear.

“There’s the old maple tree!” I cried. “And there’s my house! And there’s Mr.
Andretti’s house!”

Was I alive?

Was I really alive, sitting in my back yard, seeing all the familiar places?

Did I have my strength back?

I decided to test it. I tried to spread my wings and fly up into the air.

But for some reason, my wings didn’t seem to be working. My body felt heavy
and strange.

I frowned and looked down, inspecting myself to see what was wrong. “Whoooa!”
I cried out in surprise. Instead of six legs, I saw two arms and two legs and my
skinny old body.

Breathlessly, I reached up to touch my face. My extra eyes were gone—and so
were my antennas, and my layer of feathery fuzz. Instead, I felt hair! And smooth, human
skin!

I jumped up and shouted for joy. “I’m a person again! I’m me! I’m me!”

I threw my arms around my chest and gave myself a hug. Then I danced around
the back yard, testing my arms and legs.

They worked! They all worked!

I couldn’t get over how wonderful it was to be human again!

“But how did it happen?” I asked myself. “What happened to Dirk Davis?”

For a chilling instant, I wondered if Dirk had been forced into a bee’s body
the way I had.

Probably not, I decided.

But what had happened?

How did I get my body back?

Was it the bee sting? Did the shock of the sting send us all back to the
bodies we belonged in?

“I’ve got to call Ms. Karmen and find out!” I realized.

But for now, all I wanted to do was see my family.