2 Unhitched (30 page)

I have to admit this vehicle is amazing. I’m just not sure how it’s going to cross the hilly terrain of Lalaland without wheels.

“Tell baby to prepare for takeoff.” The Emperor yanks the reins, and the horses sprout spreading wings. The sleigh soars into the starlit sky. We’re flying!

This is the third time I’ve flown, each experience more magical than the time before. I look down and below me is a spectacular view of all of Lalaland. The magnificence of the panorama makes me at once exhilarated and light-headed. All my worries evaporate into thin air.

As we race past the golden moon, the baby kicks vivaciously. HA! The baby likes extreme rides. What a vision we must be from the earth below with my long lace train sailing in the sky like a comet.

Out of nowhere, a blast of hot air assaults me. A flash of light lights up the night sky. It’s followed by a thunderous roar that sends a shiver up my spine.

I look over my shoulder. Two flickering yellow eyes meet mine as a breath of fire heats up my face. We’re being attacked by a dragon! My heart leaps to my throat. Malevolence?

“Hold on, dahling!” yells Armando.

He pulls the horses’ reins hard, and the vehicle nosedives at least one hundred feet. Blood rushes to my head, and my stomach sinks. Oh, God! I’m going to throw up.

As Armando races full throttle ahead, I steal another glance behind us. Shit! The dragon is still on our tail. The heat of its fiery breath scorches my back.

“How is my fairy grandchild doing?” asks Armando, shooting me an anxious glance.

“Fine.” To be dead honest, I’m sick to my stomach. And sick with worry. The dragon’s hot pursuit has taken a toll on my body, and I fear the baby’s too.

“Hang in there, kid,” I say to myself.

Suddenly, we’re going up again. Higher and higher. Our vertical angle is so sharp, I’m virtually upside down. Stars shine in my eyes. I grip the side of the sleigh and scrunch my eyes shut so tightly it hurts. I don’t want to see myself tumble light years to the Earth below.

“We’re almost there,” shouts Armando.

And then finally, we’re level and cruising at an acceptable speed. Yet, I still feel extreme heat. The dragon must still be right behind to us. I dare to peel open an eye. A large ball of fire blinds me. But it’s not a dragon! It’s a star! We’re in space!

A beaming Armando tells me that we’ve lost the beast. It turns out he’s a sea of knowledge when it comes to dragons. Dragons, because of their massive size, cannot fly this high. Gravity is one of their few enemies. Water is the other. They cannot swim and fear it. Why didn’t Gothel tell me these facts?

Though it’s hard to breathe, I’m mesmerized by my surroundings. I take in all the stars—–how bright and huge they look up here—and gaze down at the Earth below. How tiny it looks! What a microcosm we are in this vast and mysterious universe! As we float through space, a sense of peacefulness ripples through me, transcending anything I’ve ever felt before.

Armando points out other planets as we begin our descent. Soon, Lalaland comes into view, its glistening towers and spires tickling the sky. We cruise toward a monumental building that, from my vantage point, resembles a giant gold crown. It must be The Midas Museum of Art.

As we prepare to land, reality sets in. I quiver with fear, having no idea how this night is going to play out. The stakes are high. There’s everything to gain. And everything to lose. Including My Prince and my baby.

Chapter 22

I
’VE HEARD A LOT ABOUT the museum from The King and Queen, but nothing has prepared me for what to expect upon entering. In a word, it’s breathtaking. Seven gilt and marble stories high, a single spiraling ramp connects the main level with the top floor. My eyes follow the ramp upward to a magnificent domed rotunda and enormous skylight. Stars and moonlight beam through it, illuminating the interior. And all of Gallant’s magnificent paintings that are hanging throughout on the white marble walls.

Everyone who’s anyone in Lalaland is here. And so are many of my Faraway friends. Pinocchio (holding hands with Peter Pan), Headmaster Diggs and, of course, Elz, Rump, Winnie, and my father, The Huntsman. Also milling around the crowd, with a notebook and stylus in his hand, is that egghead reporter from the
Fairytale Tattler
, Humpty Dumpty. He must be covering the event. Guests are admiring Gallant’s masterpieces or stuffing their faces at the candlelit buffet. Armando immediately mingles with the crowd. Virtually every princess is wearing one of his magnificent creations, each itself a work of art. I don’t, however, see Aurora. Or Gallant.

A jingling sound diverts my attention.

“Hello, dear. Everyone loves what I’m wearing and wants to know where I got it!”

It’s The Queen. I don’t believe my eyes. She’s actually stuffed her blubbery body into the stretchy jester outfit. Every roll and bulge is visible. And on top of her head, she’s wearing that ridiculous four-pointed hat with the bells. I’m sure no one here has dared to tell her how frighteningly absurd she looks in fear of losing their head.

“You simply must try the pâté,” she says, shoveling a heaping forkful into her mouth.

“Have you seen Gallant?” I ask her anxiously.

“Oh, he’s somewhere around rehearsing his speech.” She pauses to take another bite of the pâté. “He’s going to unveil something very important. I understand it involves Aurora.”

My heart practically leaps out of my chest. Aurora’s here! And he’s preparing his announcement that our marriage is to be dissolved so that he can marry her. His first true love. The woman he was meant to marry!
That’s
the real reason Humpty is here. To break the story! So that everyone can read about it in tomorrow’s
Fairytale Tattler
. The headline flashes into my head: “
EXTRA! Prince to Wed New Baby Mama”!
A giant wave of nausea washes over me. Barely recovered from the harrowing dragon encounter, I’m close to throwing up.
Please don’t barf now! Hang in there, Jane!

The baby gives me a kick, and somehow my nausea subsides enough for me to focus. My eyes dart around the museum. Gallant is still nowhere in sight. Panic grips me. Where is he? I need to tell him about the baby before his speech!
I must!

“Jane, are you okay?” I wheel around to a welcomed familiar voice. It’s Winnie, looking positively stunning in my black gown. Elz, dressed in rose, is standing beside her and looks radiant. You’d never know that just a few days ago she endured a traumatic miscarriage.

I breathe a sigh of relief. Just what I needed. My best friends. After hugs all around, I quickly catch them up on the events of the night—Armando’s fairy godmother magic, the life-and-death dragon encounter,
and
my discovery of Gallant and Aurora’s secret love child. The latter makes them gasp in unison.

“You poor thing,” singsongs Elz, giving me another sympathetic hug. “At least, you’re going down looking beautiful.”

Winnie shoots her a look of disbelief and then directs her attention at me. “Jane, there are no ifs or buts. You have to tell Gallant about
your
baby before he makes the announcement.”

Elz flashes me a wide-eyed look of surprise. Realizing what she’s just said, Winnie bites her lip. She must have forgotten to tell Elz about my pregnancy. Or didn’t want to in light of her miscarriage.

Elz bursts into tears. She must be thinking about her loss. A pang of pity stabs me.

To my surprise, they turn out to be tears of joy. She’s thrilled for me and gives me another big hug. I let her feel the baby. A genuine smile spreads across her face. Unlike me, there’s not a jealous bone in her body.

“Promise you won’t name the baby Bob,” she sniffles. “Even if it’s a girl.”

Relieved, Winnie and I share a laugh. And then, Winnie gets serious again.

“Jane, you keep looking for Gallant; we’ll spread out and look for Aurora; he could be with her.”

Leave it to Winnie to come up with a plan of attack. I describe Aurora to my posse and give them a detailed description of the black taffeta gown she’s likely wearing.

“Oooh! It sounds just like something you’d wear,” beams Elz.

My fists clench. I love Elz, but sometimes I just want to put a sock in her mouth. Another kick from the baby stops me from saying something I’ll regret.

Elz and Winnie split up, leaving me alone. I take in the scene and am mesmerized by the beauty all around me. Gallant’s paintings touch me in a way that no words can describe. I’m overwhelmed. Dizzied. Confused. And saddened. My mind flashes back to the first time I ventured to his studio and discovered his secret talent. How awed I was by his brilliance. How moved I was by his passion. I knew right then my heart belonged to him forever. I blink my eyes several times to fight back tears.

A loud growl emanating from my stomach brings me back into the moment. Despite my queasiness, my body—and my baby—are calling out for food. Keeping my eyes peeled for Gallant, I head over to the buffet. It’s a grand, candlelit display of vegetables, fruits, breads, and other delicacies that Winnie has artfully prepared. I bypass everything and make a beeline for a platter of peas, for which I have a sudden odd craving. I pile my plate high with a mountain of the green legumes.

“You should get used to eating for one,” comes a women’s voice from behind me. Startled, I spin around.

It’s her! The homewrecker. The man-eater. The whore. Aurora!

And she’s wearing the black taffeta gown along with an extravagant matching bow ornament that holds back her long golden locks.

Narrowing her eyes, she sneers at me. I can feel her venom. Unable to control myself, I sweep my free hand toward her face, ready to slap her, but she darts off, and I miss. With my plate of peas in hand, I dash after her, but the dense crowd, combined with my swollen belly, makes it impossible for me to catch up to her. Plus, too many well-wishers stop me to congratulate me on Gallant’s success. Each time someone refers to Gallant as my husband, I grow more enraged. And more determined to eliminate the wench.

In no time, I lose sight of her. Damn it!

As my eyes flicker around the room in desperation, a cold metal object hooks around my neck and swivels me around.

“Yo, Ho, Ho, babe. Looking mighty fine although I might say a few pounds heavy.”

It’s Hook in his pirate finest. It’s not surprising he’s here since he’s now a good friend of Gallant’s.

“Have you seen Gallant?” I ask, ignoring his obnoxious comment.

“Nope, haven’t seen my matey yet.” His blue grey eyes wander around the room. “Gothel should be here soon. I heard she did your hair.” He gives my updo a once-over. “Looking good, babe.” He winks at me.

I want to take that hook of his and hang him by his eyeballs. No, balls.

“Have you heard the news about Aurora?”

My heart skips a beat. “What do you know about her?” The words fly out of my mouth.

Hook gives me one of his smarmy smiles I so detest. “Gallant told me everything.” He twirls his newly grown mustache and moves uncomfortably close to me. “He wanted to surprise everyone, including you.”

Hook knows about their affair! Gallant confided in him but kept it secret from me. My stomach knots up, and my legs become jelly. I resist holding on to Hook for support.

As I steady myself, the orchestra breaks into to the kingdom’s anthem. All eyes follow King Midas and The Queen of Hearts as they march, arm-in-arm, up the spiraling ramp to a podium on the museum’s top level. Two tall torches flank the podium. Behind it, there is a massive backdrop draped in red velvet. The music stops.

Midas welcomes the glittering crowd to the opening of the museum and thanks the Seven Dwarfs, who are in the crowd, for constructing this magnificent showcase.

“At last my son’s masterpieces will have a home and can be enjoyed by everyone in Lalaland.”

Everyone, except me, if I don’t find Gallant fast and tell him about the baby. My eyes search desperately for him.

The Queen takes over and, in her bellowing voice, announces the end of cultural illiteracy in Lalaland. Her heart-shaped lips break into a proud smile.

“Ladies and gentleman of Lalaland, on behalf of my son Gallant, who will be making an announcement shortly, I thank you for your support and present to you his latest, never before seen masterpiece.”

An announcement? Shortly? I feel like I’m going over a cliff again. My heart’s falling into a bottomless pit. It’s over! My marriage is over!

The King and Queen step apart and together remove the velvet covering on the backdrop behind them.

Oh my God!

“Aurora’s Secret!” roars The Queen.

The crowd gasps. I want to die.

It’s a monumental, full-blown painting of the sketch I saw at Sparkles! Against the lush backdrop of Wonderland’s blue lagoon, Aurora, stands seductively on a giant seashell, clad only in lacy briefs. Her golden mane cascades over her full breasts, and she tilts her head up just slightly. Her lush lips are pursed, and her smoldering blue-green eyes gaze straight at me. The painting talks to me! I can hear her poisonous sweet voice.