A Bridge of Her Own (4 page)

"Was that your first time?" Wyatt asked.

She met his eyes and nodded.

He then said that was what he had assumed because it was clear she didn't know what she was doing. Shame washed over her as she let that sink in. He dropped her off in front of her dorm with no mention of seeing her again.

Chapter 6

She felt so stupid and really sore. She really wished she had a bathtub to just soak in. Lacey was asleep when she tip-toed in. She grabbed her bath stuff and went to take a shower. She felt dirty and used. After showering and brushing her teeth, she threw on sweats and ate a bowl of cereal.

After her cereal she pretended to be sleep. She did not want to tell Lacey what had happened. Eventually, she went from pretending to actually sleeping. When she woke up, Lacey was not there. It was after noon, and since it was Sunday, she did not have a class. She could just stay in bed all day.

She took a couple of Advils and checked her phone. No message from Wyatt. Somehow she wasn't surprised. She began to feel silly that she even thought she had a chance with him. Lacey came back to the dorm an hour later. When she walked in the door, Jane's resolve crumbled, and she burst out into tears.

"Oh my God, Jane!
What's wrong?" Lacey exclaimed, rushing over to her.

"I am so stupid," Jane sobbed and went on to tell Lacey what happened the night before and this morning.

Lacey was furious and used some very strong language to detail what she would do to him the next time she saw him. She couldn't stay angry for too long, though, as it was clear that was not helping Jane. She enveloped Jane into a bear hug and rocked her not unlike a child as she told her everything would be all right.

Jane calmed down and admitted she mainly felt stupid thinking Wyatt might actually have liked her more than anything else.

Lacey was aghast, and she asked, "After last night, why would you even want him to like you? You don't still like him?"

Jane lowered her head.

"Jane!" Lacey exclaimed.

"I don't know what's wrong with me." Jane sniffled.

"Alright, get your butt up. I am not going to let you sit here and pine over that asshole. We're going to get coffee, my treat," Lacey said, tugging Jane's arm.

"Uh-uh. I am never leaving this room again for as long as I live. In fact," she continued melodramatically, "I need to contact my professors to let them know I will complete my courses via correspondence from this day forward."

After a long pause, they both burst out laughing.

"Dork.
Come on. Get up. Free coffee." Lacey said, laughing.

"How can I be laughing right now?" Jane asked, surprised.

"Because. You have now joined the ranks of women everywhere who lost their virginity to a dickhead. You'll live, just like all of us," Lacey replied.

How did she always know the right thing to say? Jane wondered. Either way, she got up, pulled on a pair of boots over her sweats, threw on a jacket, and they headed out. Once at the coffee shop, Jane resolved to abstain from boys or relationships for at least the next year. Lacey rolled her eyes at that. They went on to discuss other things.
Lacey told her how things were going with Liam. Not well, unfortunately, but that actually may now be a positive since he was friends with Wyatt. That was why she was at the dorm last night.

He had annoyed her at the party so she left him there. He had been texting her ever since, but she was just ignoring him. Jane wanted to
some day have that ability to not care and said so.

"Don't think that I don't care about Liam just because I don't feel like talking to him right now," Lacey said. "It's alright that we argue now and then I guess. He just has to respect that I have a right to my opinion. And right now my opinion is he is wrong."

Later that evening, Jane's phone rang.

"It's Wyatt!" Jane exclaimed.

"Don't ans—" was all Lacey got out as Jane said, "Hello," answering the call and waving her off.

Lacey's jaw dropped. Jane was all smiles when she hung up. She turned to face Lacey, and her smile faltered.

"Wyatt's coming to get me," she mumbled.

"What happened to abstaining from boys? Plus, he was such a tool to you." Lacey offered, knowing it would get her nowhere.

"Maybe he's sorry." Jane said.

Lacey huffed then went on. "I love you, and you are a big girl so I can't stop you from seeing him. I just want you to know that I don't think he is the right guy for you."

Jane nodded and said, "I appreciate your concern, but I really like him. If this ends up being a mistake, I promise you can tell me you told me so."

Lacey frowned as she watched Jane rush to shower and change. She put on some cute black pants and a red turtleneck. She twisted her still wet hair into a bun and put on some powder and perfume. She checked her clock, threw her toothbrush in her purse, hugged Lacey, and was out the door.

From that point on, Jane and Wyatt were officially an item on campus. Jane adored him and did everything in her power to please him. If he liked a sports team, she rooted for them. If he liked a band, she bought their CD and would learn to love them as well. He was never very affectionate in public. Jane felt the most happiness when he would on occasion hold her hand when they were out and about. He was very jealous of any male attention Jane got whether actual or only perceived. This confused Jane because surely he knew she only cared for him. To avoid his annoyance on the subject though, she steered clear of guys in general just to be safe.

Chapter 7

Jane was becoming so wrapped up in Wyatt’s schedule that her own grades were faltering. Granted, she was a straight A student and was in no jeopardy of failing any of her courses; she was just turning into more of a C student. To try and curb this, she began sleeping less and working on her assignments when Wyatt was sleeping. She was exhausted but felt it was worth it in the long run. The one thing that she seemed to have less time for, the thing she missed the most, was sketching.

Wyatt had taken to remarking on the condition of her hands and nails. She, in the past, had always used her fingers to help blend the shades of whatever she was working on. Doing this over time caused a couple of her fingers to have calluses and she used to keep her nails trimmed to the extreme to aid in this. Wyatt thought it looked ‘butch’ to have such short nails so she started getting her nails done. After a while, she became so busy supporting him in all of his activities she stopped drawing outside of class.

Lacey grew to tolerate him because Jane seemed to be on cloud nine, but she never liked him. When Wyatt began ordering for Jane at restaurants, she would gush, “Isn’t it so sweet? He knows exactly what I like."

Lacey thought it cute until when eating out with them she noticed Wyatt order stuff she knew Jane disliked. She raised an eyebrow at Jane in a silent question, and Jane just shrugged in response.

She called Jane out on the ordering thing once, and her response was that Wyatt was “helping her improve her palate." She could not look Lacey in eyes when she said it. Lacey didn’t want her dislike of Wyatt to come between them so for once in her life she held her tongue. Part of her felt if she said anything Jane would just become defensive, and it would start an argument.

Jane was almost under a spell, and for her Wyatt could do no wrong. When he corrected her or urged her in a path she would not have normally taken, she truly felt it was because he was superior to her. She thought that since there were so many girls pining to date him, it was up to her to fit his mold of an ideal girlfriend. Yes, sometimes she would second-guess him, but she mostly kept those as internal questions.

The feeling of walking into a room and suddenly being important was something new to Jane. Girls envied her, and other boys now also wanted to date her The latter drove Wyatt crazy, although she did her best to avoid it. His interest in her seemed to increase others’ as well. Even if a classmate said hello to Jane when they were out, he would give her a look of almost warning, and she would excuse herself to avoid any additional attention.

His family was well known around town. His father was some elected official at the capital. Also, for the first time in her life, Jane's mother had nothing to criticize her for. After a fancy formal dinner with Wyatt and his family, Jane could do no wrong. Her father was less impressed but was, if not strong, at least silent on the matter.

Jane could agree that Wyatt was a bit bossy, but she could pardon that in him because he was on a clear life path and needed a supportive partner. He knew more about life than she did, and she appreciated the encouragement he gave her to be a person ideal enough to be with him. She began watching her weight and traded her normal jeans and t-shirt look for a reflection of her childhood wardrobe of knee length skirts with the addition of heels.

That was the tricky part. There was a fine line between looking polished and looking sexy. Wyatt wanted her to be or look sexy only for him and behind closed doors. Otherwise, he almost wanted her to look dowdy in public. One time, when they were out with some of his friends, she was wearing a skirt a bit shorter than normal. It was very pretty and she hoped Wyatt would be happy with how nice she looked.

Instead while his friends were preoccupied with something, he hissed in her ear, “I take you out with my friends, and you dress like a cheap whore."

She must have look so visibly stunned because one of his friends asked if she was all right. Seeing Wyatt glare at them, she excused herself, saying she was feeling ill. She could not see how Wyatt had thought her skirt was trashy but threw it away anyway as soon as she got home.

When Lacey saw it in the trash, she asked Jane about it.

“I just don’t like it anymore,” she said.

Unable to bite her tongue in time, Lacey returned, “Or somebody else didn’t like it."

Jane looked down and retreated to her side of the room. Lacey kicked herself for saying anything. She missed her best friend. The distance between them grew quickly at that point.

After that Jane began spending more of her time at Wyatt’s apartment. His posh two-bedroom apartment was just off campus. When she first began spending the night, they would just stay in all the time with the exception of classes and his family events. She still had her dorm room with Lacey and would run there from time to time to pick up more clothes.

When Lacey ran into her at school a few weeks later, she did a double take. Jane had always been slim, but now she looked skinny to a level that had to be unhealthy.

“Jane!” Lacey called out.

Jane saw her and turned and walked in another direction.

Lacey ran her down. “Avoiding me now?” she asked furious.

“I’m not avoiding you,” Jane lied.

But she was, and that was something she was not even able to accept herself. She knew Wyatt was not crazy about Lacey and thought she was a bad influence. If she didn’t see Lacey, she could talk herself into the idea that she was not doing it on purpose, that they were both just busy. She missed her friend, but it was almost as if a line had been drawn in her mind. On one side, she had Lacey and on the other Wyatt. She had to do everything in her power to keep Wyatt, so there was nothing else she could do.

“Darling,” Wyatt said, walking up to Jane and putting his arm around her shoulders with her back to him.

“Is she bothering you, dear?” He asked, eyes locked on Lacey’s.

“No, Wyatt. Lacey was just saying hello."

“Fine. Well, say goodbye, Jane. We have somewhere to be."

Jane raised her eyes to Lacey and did her best to say how she felt through her eyes. “Sorry Lace, I have to run."

She turned in Wyatt’s grasp so that now she was beside him instead of in front, and they made their way. A few yards away, Jane turned her head back to look at Lacey and smile. Wyatt, with his arm still around her shoulders, noticed the direction of her glance and said something in her ear. She instantly turned forward and did not look back again.

Lacey walked to a bench nearby and sat trying to wrap her brain around what had just happened. She got an email later that week from Jane letting her know she would officially be moving out of the dorm they shared and into Wyatt’s apartment. Jane sent an email instead of calling or talking to Lacey in person because she wasn’t sure if she could actually go through with it.

Wyatt’s place did not feel like home as her dorm with Lacey had. With the exception of her clothes in the closet and the dresser and stuff in the bathroom, there was nothing there that was hers. She felt as though she were a guest, and Wyatt was very picky about his things. A maid did come weekly to change the sheets and do his laundry, in addition to cleaning the apartment. Between her visits, Jane did her best to keep everything just so. Wyatt would get annoyed if he turned on the TV, and it was tuned to one of her channels. He also railed at her if she shed anywhere. She could understand why a random strand of hair would bother him so much. She considered cutting her hair but knew he preferred it long.

Her clothes hung on her. She could see she had lost weight. She was just under so much stress with school and trying to keep Wyatt happy. When he mentioned to her, off hand, that they would be spending the summer with his parents at their beach house she felt even more stressed. She wished she had time to sketch or paint, but Wyatt did not like her supplies at his place. She could only work at the studio on campus, but he didn’t like her working there because it was a communal space. So unless she was at her parent’s house, she basically didn't pursue it.