A Duke of Her Own (22 page)

Louisa could no longer imagine it: Jenny and Hawkhurst.

“Do not pin your hopes on our getting our annulment.”

Mrs. Rose arched a brow. “Even if it meant Jeremy would marry you?”

“You would have him marry me, with all that has happened?”

“He told me of the letter you wrote him, of your offer to find him a wife. I see no reason why that wife cannot be you. The scandal created here would not follow you to America.”

“Does he know you’re proposing this?”

“Of course not. But he is fond of you, and it would be no hardship for him to marry you.”

Louisa thought she’d never met a more socially ambitious woman.

“What of Kate?” Louisa asked.

“My plan will leave Pemburton for her. Do you not see how everyone will benefit?”

“You are manipulating lives.”

“Are you denying that you manipulated Hawkhurst when you allowed him to seduce you?”

Louisa came to her feet. “Mrs. Rose, I believe it is time for you to take your leave.”

“At least think on what I’m proposing.”

“I see no point in wasting my time considering it for even a moment.”

“Well, as my husband always says, there is never any harm in asking. Good day to you, Louisa.”

“Your Grace.”

The woman jerked her head back. “Pardon?”

“You will address me as Your Grace or Duchess. Marriage to my husband has earned me that respect.”

To Louisa’s immense surprise, Mrs. Rose tipped her head slightly. “Of course, Your Grace. Have a pleasant afternoon.”

Louisa was still shaking long after the woman left. The audacity of her to come here and propose such a thing. She wouldn’t dare tell Hawk about the woman’s visit. She could only imagine how angry he would get.

Or perhaps she didn’t want to tell him because she feared that he would welcome the annulment and the opportunity to marry Jenny. Marriage to Jenny would offer financial security. And how many times had he cursed her walking into the library?

Their Cinderella ball would be held in less than a week, a thousand things remained to be done in order for all to be readied, and Louisa suddenly had no energy to see to any of them. Instead she sat curled in the chair in her sitting
area, staring at the bed where only last night her husband had made passionate love to her. For a man who claimed to lose interest after the thrill of the hunt had passed, he still displayed an inordinate amount of enthusiasm when he took her in his arms.

But that enthusiasm was certain to wane from that day forward. For their marriage had done little more than preserve her reputation. There was no child to protect.

The evidence of that truth had arrived only an hour earlier and it seemed to have sapped all her strength. The knowledge made her brother’s betrayal somehow seem so much worse. If he’d kept the incident to himself, she’d have known in a little over a fortnight that marriage was not required.

Instead, his betrayal had not only been to her and Hawk, but now she knew it was also a betrayal to Caroline because it left Hawk without the means adequately to protect her. Money was indeed a great equalizer. The small Cinderella ball that Louisa had planned for Caroline’s coming out paled in comparison to the one that Hawk would have been able to give her if he’d been married to Jenny. It could have been so grand, so elaborate it would have been the talk of London, eclipsing any gossip about Caroline herself.

It was not often that Louisa was plagued with doubts regarding her plans, but she was plagued now, and it seemed more important than ever
that she ensure Caroline not have a moment’s heartache the night of her first ball.

A brisk knock sounded on the door a second before Hawk opened it and stepped into her room. Her heart tightened. She’d come to care for him so terribly much, wanted nothing more than she wanted him to be happy.

“Your list of things that needed to be accomplished today included arranging the ballroom. I thought you were going to come tell us”—he stepped farther into the room, his brow furrowing deeply—“Louisa, are you all right?”

She forced herself to smile, to nod. “We shall arrange the ballroom tomorrow. I just realized I must go to London to see to some things.”

He came farther into the room and sat in the chair opposite her. Reaching out, he took her hand. “Darling, what’s wrong?”

She was struck by two things. The endearments that he used without seeming to think about them and the fact that he was becoming adept at reading her moods. It was simply the familiarity of their being together so much of the time, not because of any great feelings he held for her.

She sighed, swallowed, squeezed his hand. “I just discovered I’m not…carrying your heir. I’m sorry.”

He gave her a tender smile. “That is a condition that we can easily rectify.”

She released a small laugh. “You are attempting to make me feel better, but do you not see? We had no reason to marry.”

“We had every reason to marry. This does not change the damage I did to your reputation.”

“Still, I’m more aware now of the sacrifice you made in marrying me.” She thought of his mother’s words about marrying for duty. Had they not done exactly that?

“Marriage to you is no great hardship,” he said brusquely.

His words were hardly a declaration of love. The sad reality was that they never would be. He’d told her they’d make the best of it, and the best was viewing it as no great hardship. If they were ever in a position to give each other gifts, would they hold no sentimental value?

“Yes, well.” She cleared her throat. “As I said, I need to take care of some matters in London regarding the ball. I’d like to go today.”

“We can leave as soon as the coach is readied.”

“No,” she said hastily. “I have a lot of small errands to run that will simply test the limits of your patience.”

“I don’t want you going alone.”

“I’ll be fine. I’m a married woman. I don’t require an escort. Don’t argue with me over this, and I’ll bring you back some brandy balls.”

“Why do I have a sense that you’re not being forthright?”

“I’m a bit melancholy. I’d not realized how much I’d hoped to be with child. Now I simply need some time alone, and the journey to London will provide me with that.”

He studied her for a moment, and she wondered if her lie was written across her face.

“I’ll return before nightfall,” she promised.

Releasing her hand, he came to his feet. “If it is your wish to journey alone…” He shook his head. “It does not feel right.”

“Please, Hawk, I so enjoyed being a woman of independent means, able to shop when and where I wished. I don’t wish to feel the shackles of marriage.”

He stiffened, and she could see her words had hurt him. She wanted to take them back, to apologize, but she needed to go to London alone, with no encumbrances to the plan that had begun forming in her mind as soon as she’d realized she wasn’t with child, a plan of which she was certain he wouldn’t approve, but she was determined to set it into motion. Hawk and Caroline would benefit immensely if she were successful.

“Very well. I will see you this evening for dinner.”

With that, he spun on his heel and walked from the room, leaving her bereft and knowing that during the next few days, for her, matters would only worsen.

As she journeyed in the coach to London, she mentally checked off all the things that remained to be done: the arranging of the arrival of the orchestra, the ordering of special meats and pastries.

A little over two hours later, she stood in the
Rose drawing room, having given her card to the butler, surprised she was not trembling as she had been that first morning when she’d awaited an audience with Mr. and Mrs. Rose.

Hearing the loud footsteps, she slowly took a deep breath as Mrs. Rose entered the room and did little more than arch a brow.

Louisa swallowed hard. “I’ve come to discuss your proposition.”

“W
hat if no one comes?” Caroline asked, fidgeting on the chair as Louisa sought to arrange her hair.

“Oh, they’ll come,” Louisa assured her, “for curiosity’s sake if nothing else.”

“Curiosity about me?”

“They don’t know about you, darling,” her mother said, as she stood off to the side watching the preparations. “I suspect they are interested in knowing how the old duchess is faring and the new duchess is weathering her sudden marriage.”

“I’m so glad you decided to attend, Mama,” Caroline said.

Louisa caught the duchess’s gaze in the mirror. She could see the worry in her eyes, knew she
was tempted to say she’d not let her daughter walk into the lions’ den alone. Instead, she smiled brightly. “I have not attended a ball in years. I would be a silly woman indeed to miss one held within my own home.” She cleared her throat. “Or my son’s home, as it were.”

“I don’t take offense at you referring to it as your home,” Louisa said. “The flower arrangements in the ballroom are absolutely beautiful.”

“Denby had great success at forcing some of the flowers to bloom early. He is a miracle worker, that one.”

Louisa stepped back. “I think that’s it for the hair.”

Caroline twisted her head one way, then the other. “It’s so lovely.”

“Come, I’ll help you get into your gown.”

Sometime later, Caroline was staring at her reflection, with tears in her eyes. “I think I look like a faerie princess.” She spun around. “What do you think, Mother?”

Louisa was disappointed, watching as the duchess gave her daughter a disapproving look.
Please don’t ruin this night for her,
she thought.
Please don’t.

The duchess shook her head. “I think something is missing. Turn back around. Perhaps I can determine what it is.”

Caroline looked so incredibly worried, Louisa’s heart went out to her.

“I can see nothing amiss,” Caroline said.

“I see the problem,” the duchess said. She slipped her hands around in front of Caroline’s
throat and when she drew them back, she clasped a pearl necklace into place. “There. Every lady of quality should have pearls. Those were my mother’s, and now they are yours.”

Louisa did not even bother to hold back her tears as she watched the mother and daughter embrace. All she could do was hope that tonight would be as wonderful as she’d envisioned, because in the end it was going to cost her everything she held dear.

Standing by the window in the library, Hawk downed the brandy in one swallow. It was only a damned ball, and his nervousness was unprecedented. He didn’t know whether to pray no one arrived or to pray everyone came. Why had he agreed to this madness? His sister was still so young, so innocent.

He would dance with her. Falconridge would dance with her. Then who? He did not expect Ravensley to show his treacherous face. He could probably entice someone with a lesser title to dance with her. A second son. A fifth son.

But even the thought of someone dancing with her brought him unease. What if the man sought to seduce her, to get her alone, to take advantage?

Dear God in heaven, what if a man such as he asked her to dance?

He prayed he’d have no daughters of his own to watch over. It was not an easy thing to give a young, innocent girl into another’s keeping. Much better to have sons who could stand up for
themselves. Although he suspected Louisa’s daughters would not do too shabbily in that regard. She could stand up to him. If only she’d not come to the library at Pemburton’s to do so.

“Hawk?”

He glanced over his shoulder and felt as though the breath had been knocked out of him.

Caroline took a step toward him. She smiled shyly. “What do you think?”

She was a vision of loveliness, dressed in white, her shoulders bared, her throat exposed.

“The ball is canceled,” he snapped. “You are to return to your room straightaway. Louisa!”

She appeared immediately, from where he knew not, and she, too, was a vision of loveliness, but he had no time to fully appreciate her beauty.

“We are not having a ball,” he said. “You and I shall stand on the steps and inform anyone who arrives there is a contagion in the house, and they must leave immediately.”

“Have you gone stark, raving mad?” Louisa asked.

“I thought there would be nothing worse than her being ignored, but now I see it will be far worse if she catches a young man’s fancy, and I have no doubt she shall successfully do that. And what if he is a blackguard such as I?”

“He shan’t be, because there is no one such as you.”

“You seek to appease me.”

“I seek to calm you down. I shall watch her closely all night. No one will take advantage.”

“She is too lovely by half. Gentlemen cannot be trusted.”

Caroline laughed. “Louisa has already explained that to me.” She held up a gloved finger. “I am never to go anywhere without a chaperone.” She extended another finger. “I am to dance no more than two dances with the same man.” Another finger. “I am to view all men as after only one thing.”

His gut clenched as he glared at his wife. “And what thing would that be?”

“A kiss,” Caroline said, in all her innocence. “And I’m not to allow any gentleman to bestow a kiss upon my person this evening.” She held up another finger. “I’m never to leave the ballroom.” Her pinky finger popped up. “And I’m to stay within view of you at all times.”

“And you think that will protect her?” he asked Louisa.

“No, I suspect your scowl will accomplish that. I thought you wanted her to have attention.”

“I want her to be happy.”

Caroline skipped across the room and took his gloved hands in hers. “I will be. I promise.”

He gazed into her dark eyes. “If at any time, you wish the ball to cease, you have but to ask. I’ll send everyone away without qualm.”

She rose up on her toes and kissed his cheek. “I could not ask for a better brother.”

She might not ask for a better brother, but he felt certain she deserved one. Just as his wife deserved a better husband. There had been moments in his
life when he’d felt unworthy of the dukedom. Glancing past his sister to his wife, who seemed so confident the evening would have a successful outcome, he could not help but be impressed.

He considered telling her she was lovely beyond measure, but he held the words in check because tonight belonged to Caroline.

He shifted his gaze over to his mother, who did not possess Louisa’s confidence. She appeared terrified, and he wanted nothing more than to spare her whatever discomforts she was feeling. “Mother, truly, Louisa and I can handle the greeting if you are not feeling well.”

“I brought this upon us. I shall not shirk my duties.”

He saw the pain flash across Caroline’s face. He took her gloved hand, brought it to his lips. “She does not consider you a duty, Moppet. None of us do. You are a treasured gift.”

Tears welled in her eyes, his words not having the expected outcome of bringing her joy. “I shall bring you no shame this evening.”

“You never have, Caroline.”

Caroline pressed a hand to her chest. “I’m having such a difficult time breathing, I fear I shall swoon.”

“You must wait to swoon until you have a gentleman to catch you,” her mother said.

“That’s the first time you’ve indicated that perhaps there will be a gentleman for me.”

“There will be, my darling, I’m sure of it,” his mother said.

Louisa clapped her hands. “Come, come, I hear the carriages arriving. I daresay tonight will be one that none of us shall ever forget.”

Hawk stood beside his wife in the ballroom, dread tightening his stomach. He’d not been this nervous when he’d attended his first ball. Come to think of it, he hadn’t been nervous at all that night. Nor any other.

But that was before he knew what it was to lift his trembling sister into his arms, to cradle her as he trudged across the moor, to know her death would be upon his shoulders.

“I pray it does not rain this evening,” he murmured.

“It shan’t,” Louisa said, as though she oversaw the weather with the ease she did their ball. “It’s going to be a lovely evening.”

“You are quite the continual optimist.”

She jerked her head around at his tartly delivered words. “Would you rather I be sour? I can manage that quite well if you prefer.”

He offered her a small smile. “Forgive me. I…”

“You’re nervous,” she said, and he heard the disbelief in her voice.

“I’m concerned.” He leaned near, inhaling her familiar fragrance, wanting to nuzzle his nose against her neck and breathe more deeply. In a low voice so as not to be heard by the sister standing beside him, he said, “As you are well aware, Caroline does not handle disappointment well.”

“She won’t be disappointed. Trust me.”

“How can you be so sure?”

He saw guilt flicker across her face, thought she was on the verge of explaining how she could possess such confidence, but the first of their guests walked in through doors leading from the tea room. Arranging for the ball had not been as costly as he’d feared, but neither had it been cheap. Still, he prayed that it would cost them only coins and not hearts.

He’d instructed Louisa to spare no expense, and she’d apparently taken him at his word. He didn’t know where she’d managed to find the servants who were escorting their guests to the rooms she’d designated to be used as cloakrooms, so their guests could shed their coats and shawls and see to straightening themselves before entering the tea room, where light refreshments awaited them. Only then, once they were refreshed from their journey, did they dare enter the ballroom, where their host and hostess were waiting to greet them. Along with Caroline and his mother.

It broke his heart to see the anticipation clearly etched on Caroline’s face, the worry visible in his mother’s eyes. If only he’d not been distracted from his purpose in marrying Jenny Rose then this evening would be ensured of success. As it was, he feared it was doomed to failure, for Caroline came with no dowry, no father…and as guests continued to parade in, no dance partner.

“Please cease your scowling,” Louisa whispered after a time.

“This is not going well.”

“Be patient. I assure you all will be well,” she said with her eyes fixed on the doorway. Then she smiled, a jubilant smile of welcome.

He looked to the doorway and felt as though he’d taken a punch to the gut. The very last people he’d expected to see this evening were approaching: Jenny and Jeremy Rose.

“I believe you are as beautiful as my brother claimed,” Caroline said to Jenny after introductions were made.

“Caroline,” Hawk muttered.

“Oh, I’m sorry, that was probably the wrong thing to say. I’ve never met an American.”

“We’re not that different,” Jenny said.

“You’re fabulously wealthy.”

“Caroline,” Hawk murmured.

“Oh, that was wrong to say, too. I’m so sorry. I’m terribly nervous.”

“I think you’re delightful,” Jeremy Rose said. “May I have the pleasure of the first waltz?”

Hawk wasn’t certain who stared harder: himself or Caroline.

“Oh, yes, yes, Mr. Rose. I would be honored.”

“If I may have your dance card so you don’t forget…”

“Oh, I shan’t forget, but it would be nice to have your name upon my card.” She slipped it off her wrist and watched, enthralled, as he penned his
name on her dance card, then his engagement card before handing her card back to her. He slipped his card and the dance list into his jacket pocket.

“I’ll have a word with you before the dance,” Hawk said quietly.

Jeremy smiled at him, the smile of a gentleman accustomed to having his way. “I don’t believe so.”

“If you so much—”

“Hawk.” He heard the chastisement in his wife’s voice, felt her small hand biting into his arm. “Don’t ruin everything.”

He glanced back at her.

“Trust me,” she’d said.

Nodding, he turned back to the new arrivals. “Thank you for coming,” he forced himself to say.

“I’m sorry Kate’s not here this evening,” Jenny said, her voice low. “She began reading a new novel and simply couldn’t tear herself away from it.”

“She so loves her books,” Louisa said.

“A bit too much I’m beginning to think.”

He did not see Louisa signal, but she must have because the strains of the music indicating the first dance, a quadrille, began to play.

“You should honor your sister with the first dance,” Louisa said. “I can see to greeting our guests.”

He was more than ready to leave this obligation behind. He turned to his sister. “Miss Caroline, may I have the pleasure of this dance?”

Her face lit up as though by a thousand electric lights, and while he had yet to have electricity installed in his homes, he’d seen the electric lights becoming more and more accessible throughout London, but their brilliance paled when compared with the glow in Caroline’s eyes.

“I would be honored, Your Grace.”

He offered her his arm and thought perhaps, for a moment at least, all would be well.