A Friendly Engagement (18 page)

“What? Don’t tell me you regret what just happened?” She lifted herself onto her elbow and looked down on him.

His face gave nothing away. So she took a big breath before she grabbed the horns.

“Okay, maybe having sex added another iron to the fire in regards to how hard this week is going to be. But obviously we both felt something.”

“Something damn strong.”

She nodded. “I think what happened only reinforces our bond. We’re adults. We’re good friends. We know each other like the back of our hands—”

“After tonight I’d definitely agree with that.”

She punched him in the shoulder. “So what if we let nature take control? You’re not worried about what’s going to happen now?”

He rubbed the arm she’d punched, but his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. He had some reservations. She needed to ease his mind.

“I wasn’t worried until you walked out the bathroom door.”

She frowned. “Why?”

“I hoped I had another condom. Or a few more.”

She laughed. “I was thinking the same thing.”

“Great minds.”

“I’m concerned that come morning, after a few more silver packets have been used—”

“A few more, eh?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

She rolled her eyes. “Can you handle it?”

“Can you?”

She covered his mouth with her fingers. “Let me finish will you? In the light of day are you going to regret what we’ve done? Are you going to pull away? Get all weird?”

He shifted his position until he lay on his side, his head resting in the palm of his hand. “Are you? Aren’t you worried about next week? The week after? Our friendship and working relationship?”

She shook her head. “You know me, I live in the moment.”

“But this is different, Dev. You have to admit we crossed a line. There’s no going back. Our relationship will forever be different.”

“That doesn’t mean it has to be different in a bad way. We’re both adult enough to handle whatever life throws our way. Let’s just go with the flow. Truthfully, I think this week is going to do you some good, and what happened between us is a bonus. You’re always so…so by the book. Maybe the fact that we had sex will help you understand that it’s okay to color outside the lines.”

“I don’t want a relationship. And, more importantly, I don’t want to hurt you.” He caressed her cheek.

She touched his fingers and squeezed. “Neither do I. And you won’t.”

“Most women in my life start to get needy after—”

“So not me. Listen, O, I’m not in the market for a love match. We click. We always have. I get you, you get me. It only makes sense we click in the bedroom, too. I don’t want to turn this into something it isn’t. Just because we took a tumble between the sheets doesn’t mean I’m going to go all soft, giggly, and gooey-eyed. Any more than you will. Let’s just go with it, for however long we both want. No strings. Kind of like a friends with benefits type of deal. Wasn’t there a movie about this?”

He pressed his lips together in a slight grimace. “Yes, and it ended—”

“This is real life, we can write our own script. Steer our destiny.”

The tension left his body with a sigh, and his shoulders sagged. He sank against the pillows, pulling her with him. Devi nestled back into the curve of his arm, satisfied she quashed his fears about any type of neediness on her part.

Sex was sex. Even awesome sex was sex, just with awesome. No need for anything between them to change.

Well, maybe a little change. But only for the better.
She smiled to herself and turned on her side to absorb his body heat. He’d be the perfect furnace on a cold winter night.

“I’m glad we’re on the same page. I’m attracted to you, we have amazing chemistry, but my main focus has to be that contract. You understand that, right?”

Her belly flipped with regret as she nodded.
Don’t let the afterglow from the best sex ever affect your head. You don’t want anything more than Omar does.

Devi wiped any thoughts of something more like a future from her mind. The best sex might be playing a little havoc with her head and what she thought she wanted. But the last thing she’d ever be was a needy woman. Relationships looked good from a distance—you always had a Friday night date, or a plus one for a wedding, you didn’t ever sit home on Valentine’s, and sex could be a more regular event—but deep down she didn’t want the obligation. More importantly, she didn’t want to end up broken-hearted like her mom.

She’d live her life on her terms, with sprinkles of awesome sex, good food, an incredible job, and fun. Screw Valentine’s Day, and screw needing a date for a wedding. She’d gone stag before, she could do it again.

“And if you’re game for seeing where this goes, then I am, too. But I don’t want that to consume me this week. Let’s have fun like you suggested, but my main focus was and always will be work.”

How come he sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than her?

“I know why we’re here, O.” She grinned.

“And if our relationship is convincing enough to put us in the running for that contract, then all the better.”

She wouldn’t let his words take away from what they’d experienced. Sometimes men had no clue. She might not want a relationship, but she didn’t want what they’d shared to be thought of as a business enhancement, either. And a few sweet words to wrap it up while they basked in the afterglow might be nice, too.

Geesh!

Any thoughts about jumping Omar’s bones a second time dialed down a few notches. Her libido had been hit and sunk.

They laid in each other’s arms in silence. She could hear the pounding of his heart in her ear as she rested against his chest. Her fingers drew lazy circles around his belly button as she tried to figure out why his words had taken the wind out of her sails.

She didn’t want more. Did she?

“Can I ask you a question?”

She tensed at his words. “Sure.”

“Do your feelings about relationships have anything to do with your mother?”

Devi blew out her breath. “Gawd, sometimes you know me too well. That in itself is scarier than your fear of needy women,” she teased. Part of her feared putting her thoughts into words. As if once she said them aloud she couldn’t ever go back.
Back to what?
Only Cass had heard this deep confession aloud—and that’d been after a few bottles of wine during a late-night heart to heart.

“Well?”

His words broke through her thoughts, and she levered herself back up on her elbow to look him in the eye.

“I don’t ever want to love someone as much as my mom loved my dad. His rejection ruined her life. Even if she had lived, I don’t know if she’d have ever recovered. That’s the gist of things I got from Grams. I want to live my life. Have fun. No worries about anyone but myself. I know that sounds selfish.” She jerked her shoulder, pressing her lips together.

“Then I guess I’m selfish, too. I have no desire to tie myself down to anyone, either. I have enough satisfaction with my job. I don’t mind having a woman in my life from time to time, as long as she understands I don’t want anything more.” His brow lifted, as if challenging her.

The stiffness in her neck spread down to her shoulders, and she sat upright, resting her back against the headboard. Omar propped his head up with his fist, still on his side.

“Geesh, O. You don’t have to walk a tightrope.” She gave him a half-hearted laugh. “I understand, and I won’t be expecting anything more down the road.”

“I had to reiterate.”

“For what it’s worth, our little escapade between the sheets might have more benefit than even you’re thinking. Sure, we might appear more natural around each other when we kiss, or hold hands, or whatever. And that might help seal the deal with Bartow. You might get the contract, and I might have more great sex—”

“You’re not the only one.” He laughed and sat up, crossing his legs, his knees rubbing against her thigh. He cupped her cheek, lifting her mouth to his for a quick kiss. “Damn, you still taste amazing, woman.”

“Mmm, quit distracting me. I was trying to tell you that all of this will only help in the lesson I’ve been trying to show you since we met.”

He studied her face intently as he rubbed her chin with his thumb. “What lesson?”

“I’ve always told you that you work too hard. You need to learn to loosen up, live in the moment. Quit worrying about everything and have some fun. Life goes by too quickly, and you never know what’s going to happen, when it’ll be cut short. Look at my mom. Do you think she imagined for a second she wouldn’t live to see me grow up?” Devi gulped a breath of air as tears filled her throat. She hadn’t meant for her emotions to gain control of her words. Even though she never knew her mom, she missed her every day.

Omar took her in his arms and gave her another one of his amazing bear hugs.

“Your hugs get better each time, you know?”

“Practice makes perfect. Plus, I don’t like seeing you hurting.”

Heat stung her face, the back of her neck. Sometimes he could say the nicest things. And that’s all she wanted out of their relationship besides friendship, and a good hug once in a while.
Well, that and some more awesome sex.

“O, I only want you to understand that all the money and success in the world won’t mean a thing the day you take your last breath.”

“They’ll mean pride. Accomplishment. I’ll be remembered.”

“And that’s a blip on the screen. Who will remember you for your business dealings? And truthfully, do any of those people really matter? Good friends and your family are the heart of life. I wish you’d make up with your brothers. And stop working so hard. Take your mom out for lunch when she stops into the office. Go on a fun trip. Start a hobby like sky-diving, water skiing, basketball—I don’t care. Get out there and live.”

“I think you’re too close to the big picture, Dev.”

Gawd, she loved when he called her that. “How so?”

“What do you think I’ve been doing the last week?”

“Trying to secure a contract.”

He grimaced. “More than that. I might not have a hobby all picked out, but I was damn relaxed at work when we announced our engagement.”

“All in the name of getting that contract.” She lifted her brow in a challenge.

“I’m sure half the staff thought I was an imposter.”

“I think they enjoyed getting to know another side of you.”

“And I’ve been nothing but social since we arrived here.” He pressed his fingers to her lips when she opened her mouth. “I admit I wouldn’t have loosened up as much if you hadn’t been by my side, so I thank you for that. But the point is I’m making an effort.”

And he was. He really was. “But you’re doing it all for the purpose of the contract. I want you to live it. Own it. Make it your new way of life.”

He shrugged. “Baby steps.”

“And what about your brothers?”

He stiffened. “I’ll think on it. There’s a lot of history there to fix. Not sure any of us care to even try at this point.”

“A good talk could clear the air. At least you’ll have tried. And your mom? She really wants a relationship with you.”

“She didn’t when I was growing up. She only had time for my brothers. They traveled and spent time together.”

Pain laced his words. Her belly sank. “I’m sorry to bring up bad memories. And I’m sorry you were hurt. But did you ever think that she didn’t really abandon you? Maybe your dad was the one who wouldn’t let you go?”

His face set in stone, and he shrugged. Like a little boy disguising his pain with indifference. But she knew better.

“Think about it. Talk to her. Hear her side of things before you totally write her off. There has to be a reason she’s trying to be involved in your life now. Don’t shut her out because when she’s gone, it’ll be too late.”

Omar nodded but remained silent. He flopped onto his back and raked his fingers through his hair. “Do we really need to talk about this when you’re sitting next to me in nothing but a smile? All I want to do is take you in my arms, kiss you, and let nature take its course.”

She rubbed her hand down his jaw, relishing the feel of his rough stubble. He didn’t want to talk about it, and that was fine. At least she’d planted the seed.

“You know what I have hidden under my pillow?” he asked. Mischief filled his eyes as he turned toward her, thrusting his hand beneath his pillow.

“A tooth?”

“Nope.”

“One of Mack’s hot dogs slathered in mustard?”

His laughter warmed her flesh. He pulled out a silver packet and grinned.

“You really were a Boy Scout.”

He pulled her into his arms. When his mouth found hers, she sank against him. Her body hummed as he ran his hands down her back, then cupped her rear.

“The best part is that we’re already naked, so we can get to the good stuff a lot sooner.” She grabbed the packet and tore it open with her teeth.

“God, I love when you do that.”

She bit the air. “Shark bite for you, you kink monster.” Devi nipped the side of his lip, sliding her hand down his taut stomach until she met the velvet skin of his erection. “Ooh, what have we here? No foreplay required.” She ran her hand down his length, enjoying the thrill of his thickness reacting to her touch as she slid on the condom.

“You want to play?” he asked.

“Hmm. Always.”

Before she could blink, he pulled her down flat onto the bed, grabbing her wrists and holding them over her head. Her chest expanded and held when she sucked in a surprised gasp of air. He lowered his head to lick, suck, nip, and tease one nipple.

Something about the way his mouth moved across her skin told her of his urgency. He seemed rough, more sure, in total control. Or maybe it was the sensation of the growth on his chin that had her thinking rough and urgent.

Whatever. It didn’t matter. She liked it. She wanted it.

“Want to shake things up a bit?” His mouth devoured her flesh. The muscles along his back bunched as he tried to rein himself in and not rush. He laved attention on her breasts one at a time, then slid his tongue along her sternum, blazing a trail of tiny kisses along her collarbone and working his way up the column of her throat with tender love bites.