A Gathering of Memories (28 page)

“I need to check on the boys.” Mandy started away, but Ross caught her hand. She spoke without looking at him.

“I can’t take a chance, Ross, that I’m imagining what I see or that you’ll change your mind.”

“Amanda, you’re not—”

“Please let go, Ross,” she interrupted him. He did so, reluctantly. The pleading tone in her voice had been too much.

As Ross watched her walk away, it was his turn to plead. “Heavenly Father, show me, help me. She’s so precious and vulnerable, and I can’t get her out of my mind. But please, God, please don’t let me hurt her.”

43

 

“Thanks, sweetheart. Okay, Mandy, try this key from Amy’s diary.” Silas took the tiny key from his wife’s hand and handed it to his oldest adopted daughter. The whole family watched as she put the key into the lock and worked it gently.

“Let me try.” Silas took the diary and, after a few seconds of rattling and twisting, the small lock sprang open. Silas handed the book back to Mandy, and everyone crowded around to see her open it.

“I can’t see,” Becca complained and Silas swung her up into his arms.

“The first entry is in May, just after I was born!” Mandy exclaimed.

No one thought to get comfortable in the living room. They huddled in the space outside of Silas and Amy’s bedroom, looking over Mandy’s shoulder as she read several pages. Some entries were months apart and not every word was legible. But all were dated and the children were given a last glimpse, a last touch, from their mother.

When Mandy could no longer see the pages through her tears, she handed the book to Carrie. But Carrie was in the same state, and within the space of a few seconds all of the children were crying. Silas looked on helplessly, as even his wife’s tears fell, before going to the piano and playing very softly the song Amy had sung in church.

It took some time but eventually they were all gathered around the piano and Amy sang. Mandy and Carrie were still very emotional and their tears would not stop. Levi, Clovis, and Becca had stopped crying and were stationed as close to
Silas’ moving hands as they could be. When he stopped playing, Clovis spoke. “Can you teach me to do that?”

“To play the piano?”

“Yeah.”

“Anytime, son.”

“Am I really your son?” Silas sat frozen for an instant. The quiet, well-behaved, seemingly
need
less Clovis was looking as if his very life depended on Silas’ answer.

“I would never do anything to make you forget your mother and father, but Clovis, I think of you as my son. I think of all of you as my own children. It doesn’t matter that Amy and I are not your physical parents, you’re
ours
.”

Silas lifted Clovis into his lap and held him close. He reached for Levi next and cuddled the boy to his chest. Silas’ tears came when, for the first time, Levi hugged him back. His face was still wet as he put his arms around Becca. Mandy and Carrie, who had just stopped crying, were again sobbing when Silas came to embrace them.

There were no arguments about an early bedtime; everyone was drained. Amy lay dozing, comforted to feel the mattress beneath her back.

“I’m amazed, Silas, at how comfortable and responsive the children are and after such a short period of time.”

“It’s got to be the Lord.”

“I can understand why they go to you because their need for a father was so desperate, but
me
, Silas? I just can’t understand how loving they are to me.” After Silas had hugged them, the children had gone of their own accord to Amy and embraced her without a trace of reserve.

“I don’t think it’s hard to understand. A child couldn’t help but react in turn to the love and kindness you show.”

“Mandy’s not a child.” Silas said nothing in answer to Amy’s serious comment.

Both of them had been in the backyard when Mandy had come around the corner of the house, face flushed and looking miserable. Her very stance said she did not want to be questioned. Things became even more confusing when Ross, looking equally upset, followed her and watched her from a distance until it was time to go home.

“We’ve got to remember what Ross said to us the night he came to supper—that he wouldn’t hurt her.”

“That might not be as easy as he thinks. When one person’s feelings have gone deeper than another’s…” Amy did not go on. The words were too painfully close to the hard start she and Silas had shared.

“God loves Mandy and He knows very well how bruised she is right now. We’ve got to trust that He will take care of her, sweetheart. This isn’t like when Becca falls and needs a kiss—I wish it were. This is much more serious. We’ve prayed about spouses for the girls, and I have to believe that God loves them enough to give them the best.”

These were comforting words on which to fall asleep, words that Mandy could have used as she slowly turned the pages of the diary and read in bed by lamplight.

She could almost see the change in her mother as she turned the pages. Carefree and in love, raising a little girl. Then maturing into a woman who wonders where her husband is and how she’ll ever get over having to bury one of her babies. As the picture on the dresser faded into the woman Mandy grew up with, she knew she had to put the book down.

She tried to pray in the darkness then, wanting to thank God that He’d saved her and to praise Him for His love. Other nights she would have gone on to ask God to save Levi, Clovis, and Becca. She would also have asked for wisdom and a daily thirst for the Word, but tonight her mind could only conjure up one image and that was the face of Ross Beckett.

“I love you, Ross.” The words were said into her pillow as sleep came over her. She wished it were Ross’ ears hearing them.

 

“Your deal, Aaron.”

“Aaron, are you in the game?”

Aaron Marks took up the cards without comment and began to deal. The hope that a card game would divert his thoughts hadn’t worked. He was losing money hand over fist and his mood was growing blacker by the second.

Something was not quite right, he was sure. There was some loose end that was going to trip him up, and until he found out what it was he would not rest.

A sudden memory of Mandy Jackson standing in front of the shack came to mind. She was holding a small book. He’d bet plenty it was something she’d taken from inside. He played around with the idea of having the sheriff go after it but quickly ruled it out. The man was a bleeding heart and could not be bought. In Marks’ estimation that made him worthless.

No, he’d have to get his hands on the book himself. He could use another look at those papers too. Last time he’d been in too much of a hurry and only took the letter. His attention suddenly turned back to the game, and he won the hand.

He had a course of action now, he thought with a smile, and everything would be fine.

44

 

“When do you expect the girls?” Preston asked as he took another sip of coffee.

“This evening. Si and Amy are taking a late train for Neillsville. Amy said they would spend tomorrow with her dad before heading off on their own.”

“Will Carrie go to school tomorrow?”

“She’ll walk with Mark’s girls. Then Mandy and I will go to work. I know Carrie will want to stay away from school since it’s the end of the week, but I don’t feel right about that.”

“When will Silas and Amy be back?”

“Monday night, or maybe afternoon. Cora spoils you, Preston. This lunch was wonderful.” The words were deliberately spoken as Preston’s ancient-looking housekeeper and cook came in to serve dessert. In exchange for her compliment, Emily was given a toothless grin before the old woman shuffled out of the room.

“She’s one of a kind—I’ll give her that. I can’t think what would happen to her if I didn’t need her anymore.” The words lay between them, feeling like a rushing river, frightening to cross.

“I’m an old woman, Preston, set in my ways.” Emily spoke quietly, honestly.

“And I wouldn’t change a thing about you.” The expression on his face made the words a promise.

“I believe you wouldn’t. What I can’t believe is that you don’t want someone young, someone who could give you years of companionship.”

“I believe we would have years together, but if it was only six months Emily, it would be worth every second.”

She slid her hand along the table top then, and Preston’s fingers closed over hers. “Will you join the girls and me for supper on Saturday night?”

“I’d love to,” he said with a smile.

“Why don’t you bring Peter and Ross.”

“Peter plans to go to Reedsburg for the weekend to see his folks, but I’ll ask Ross.”

“Something tells me he’ll jump at the chance.”

 

“How’s my little Robyn bird?” Silas swung his niece up into his arms and nuzzled her neck. She giggled, looking down at Levi and Clovis.

“You’re sleepin’ in my room and I’m sleepin’ in with Mama.”

“Hi, boys,” Mac came out of the house toward the wagon. He lifted a small traveling bag from the back, and told the boys they had about half an hour before supper.

Levi and Clovis started off with Charlie. Silas put Robyn down and grabbed them to him.

“Have fun, and I’ll see you sometime Monday.”

“Do we walk home with Charlie or go to our house?”

“Come here to Mac’s.” He hugged and kissed each one and then sent them off with a gentle tap to their backsides.

Mac and Silas watched as the three boys disappeared around the corner of the house with Robyn in hot pursuit.

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