Authors: Keith Thomas Walker
“Mama, I’m going to call. I promise.”
“When?”
“Whenever you want me to. How often do you want me to call?”
“
Every day
, Candace. I worry about you
every single day
.”
“I can’t call every day,” Candace said. “But I can call once a week for sure. Maybe twice.”
“
Twice
. Twice would be better.”
“Where’s Dad?”
“He went to get his oil changed. He’s going to hate that he missed you. Can you call back later so he can talk to you? He’s sorry about what happened last time. He talks about it every day.”
“I’m sorry too,” Candace said. “I shouldn’t have hung up. He was right.”
“No, no, he didn’t have to talk to you like that.”
“Mama, it’s all right. I’m different now. He was right and I knew it. I just didn’t want to hear it.”
“So this boy you’re living with, is he out of jail, or what happened with that?”
“No, he’s not out of jail yet. I don’t think he’s getting out.”
“So you’re down there all by yourself? Baby, you should come home. You’re going to have that baby, and you’ll need help.”
“I don’t need help, Mama. I already had the baby. We’re fine.”
“
You had the baby
?”
“Yes.”
“When?”
“On the thirtieth.”
“
Candace!
That was two weeks ago! Why didn’t you call?”
“I wasn’t ready yet. I’m sorry.”
“Oh, my. Baby, we should have been there for you. Is the baby healthy? Are you all right? You need to come home, Candace. Cut out this foolishness.”
“Mama. I can’t. Come home. Right now. If you can’t respect that, I won’t be able to call you every week.” She hated putting this ultimatum on her mother, but could think of no other way to do it.
“No, Candace. It’s fine. However you want to do it. Just, don’t stop calling.”
“We’re all right, Mama. Don’t worry so much.”
“Are we never going to get to see the baby? Not that I’m asking you to come home, I’m just asking if we can see you guys. We miss you, Candace. Please don’t get mad.”
“I miss you, too,” Candace said. “And I’m not mad, I just, I just messed up pretty bad down here. I know I can run back home, but I don’t want to do that. I want to get myself straight. I want to see you guys, but I can’t. Probably not for a few months. Is it all right if I just call until then?”
“Are you in trouble, Candace? Tell me the truth.”
All right, Dad. I won’t go to Rilla’s concert. I promise.
“I’m fine, Mom. There’s nothing at all to worry about.”
“The baby,” Mrs. Hendricks said. “Tell me about my grandbaby. Is it a boy or a girl?”
“It’s a girl. And she’s beautiful.” Candace’s eyes glossed over. “She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”
She spoke with her mother for another ten minutes and made it back to her bus stop five minutes early.
* * *
Back at her apartments Candace found everything the same, but everything was still different. The first problem was the absence of her car. She always parked in the same spot, and there weren’t a lot of vehicles to sort through at twelve o’clock in the afternoon. There was only one car parked in front of Candace’s building, and it wasn’t her Nissan Sentra.
She marched up the stairs knowing what she would find, but was still not prepared for her landlord’s tactics. Her front door was fixed. Candace got closer and realized this one was brand new. The fresh paint had no scars or chips that she could see.
But there was something wrong with the new door. Rather than change the locks, the apartment manager affixed a device Candace had never seen before. It was like a metal doorknob
glove
. It fit perfectly and had a small keyhole Candace didn’t have access to. She wrestled with the fixture, but it turned loosely in her hand, providing no traction on the actual doorknob.
Great
, she thought and headed across the street. More than half of the residents at the neighboring apartments were at work this time of day, but Candace knew of at least one person who would be home. Trisha’s door was open, so she walked right in.
“Hey,” she called. Her friend’s apartment was eerily quiet. There wasn’t even a television on. Candace rounded the corner and found Trisha stretched out on her couch, fast asleep. Willie Jr. lay on top of her, nestled between her soft bosoms. Little Sammy dozed on the loveseat. Petey was nowhere to be found. Candace hoped he was napping in one of the back rooms and not exploring the apartment grounds.
She stood in the living room and grinned at the snoozing family. It felt good to be around normal people for a change.
“Must be nice,” she said.
Trisha stirred from her sleep only moderately. “What you talking about?” she asked, her eyes still closed.
“I say it must be nice to be able to chill at home all day.”
“You lazy, too. You don’t do nothing but take a couple classes,” Trisha mumbled, and then lifted her head from the cushions. She squinted at Candace and sat up quickly, almost sending Willie Jr. crashing to the floor.
“
Girl, where the hell you been?
I heard they took you to jail!”
“I have been in jail,” Candace said. “Two weeks and three days. I just got out.”
“No shit?
Damn, girl
. I can’t believe they arrested you. That’s messed up. You never did nothing to nobody.” Trisha stood and bounced anxiously. “Gimme a hug, Candace. You all right? Nobody hurt you?”
“No. Nobody hurt me.” Candace stepped between the big woman’s arms and felt good in the embrace. She couldn’t remember the last time a female wanted to hug her.
Trisha backed away with her nose twisted. “You need to take a shower.”
“I know. I don’t need you to tell me how bad I smell.”
“Why they arrest you?” Trisha asked.
“Somebody said I was a drug dealer.”
Trisha’s face went slack. “Who said that?”
“I don’t know. They never told me. But whoever it was said they bought drugs from me and everything.”
“That’s crazy.”
“Who are you telling? I think I know who it was.” Trisha stepped in closer. “Who?”
“I can’t tell you, Trish. You’ll tell everybody.”
Trisha stomped her foot. “C’mon, Candace, I won’t tell nobody!”
“I’ll tell you later.”
“Uhn-uhn. Tell me now.”
Candace hated herself for bringing it up. “CC.” Trisha threw a hand over her mouth. Her eyes were as big as silver dollars.
“That’s just what I
think
,” Candace said. “Don’t tell anybody. If he finds out he’ll start tripping.”
“Why would he do that?”
“There’s something up with him. For real.”
“They said it was drugs up there,” Trisha said. “Yeah. Rilla had a duffle bag in the closet.”
“The cops found it?”
“I told them where it was. I thought they’d leave me alone once they got it. I was so scared. I’d never been that scared in my whole life.”
“Why would they believe CC over you?”
“I got an idea.”
“Like what—” Trisha stepped back and stared at Candace again. Her jaw dropped. “Bitch, where’s your baby?”
“I had her already.” Candace giggled. “She’s beautiful. You should see her.”
“When did you have her? Not in jail.”
“Right before. My water broke when I was up there with the cops.”
“Where is she?” Trisha asked, but Candace’s whole demeanor changed with that question.
“I don’t know,” she said. “The police said I have to call CPS to get her back.”
Trisha looked like a doleful grandmother. “You’ll get her back. You a good girl.”
“I know.”
“For real. Once they find out what kind of person—”
“I know,” Candace said. She looked her friend in the eyes. “I’m getting my baby back.”
Trisha wisely changed the subject. “Girl, they tore your apartment
up.
The manager was mad as hell. It was—
ooh
, you really do stink, Candace!”
“Uh,
yeah
. I’ve been wearing the same thing for two weeks.”
“Why you didn’t take a shower before you came over here?” Trisha asked with a hand over her face.
“I can’t get in my apartment,” Candace said. “They’ve got this thing on the doorknob.”
“A metal cover?”
“Yeah.”
“The manager put that on.”
“They can’t do that. The rent’s not due yet.”
“She must wanna talk to you before she let you back in.”
“I don’t want to talk to her.”
“Well, if you want your stuff, you’re going to have to. Girl, you look
bad
.”
“Thanks,” Candace said. “Listen, I don’t want to trouble you too much, but do you think I could take a shower over here? And I don’t have any clean clothes to put on, either. They’re all in my apartment.”
“Candace, you know you can take a shower here. I don’t know about the clothes, though. You can’t fit nothing I wear.”
“I can wear the same pants till I get in my apartment if you have another shirt.”
“No, Candace. You cannot wear those pants till
anything
. I’m surprised they not making you itch. I think I have some warm-ups in there. They big, but you can tie the string.”
“That’s perfect,” Candace said. “You’re a lifesaver, Trisha. I really appreciate it.”
“Girl, I’d do anything to get you out of those clothes. You’re going to have to throw them away, you know. That smell never comes out.”
* * *
Candace’s shower was like an Herbal Essences commercial; she actually moaned aloud a couple of times. The water was hot, the steam was soothing, and no one at all could see her. It was funny, the things you appreciate after a couple weeks in jail.
A DOLLAR AND A DREAM