A Kauffman Amish Christmas Collection (11 page)

“But,
Mamm
,” Anna Mae began. “I came all this way to see you.”

“I know.” Mary Rose stood. “But you know your father.” She hugged Kathryn. “Supper was
wunderbaar. Danki
.” She then touched Anna Mae’s shoulder. “Come and visit me before you leave.”

Anna Mae stood with tears in her eyes. “You can’t let him do this to me,
Mamm
. Kellan and I were hoping that we could be a family again. You have to stand up to
Daed
.”

“He’s the bishop.” Mary Rose’s eyes filled with tears. “I have to go.
Ich liebe dich, mei dochder
.” She patted Anna Mae’s hand and then rushed out of the kitchen.

“Mamm! Mamm
!” Anna Mae started after her. “Please don’t go.”

“Anna Mae!” Kathryn grabbed Anna Mae’s arm and pulled her back to the table. “Stop. Just let her go.”

“What if I never see her again?” Anna Mae lowered herself into the chair.

“Shh.” Kathryn sat beside her and rubbed her arm. “Trust God to heal the family.”

Covering her face with her hands, Anna Mae dissolved into tears.

David leaned against the barn door and glanced up toward the sky. Large flurries twirled and danced to the ground, covering the pasture with a silver quilt. He glanced over at his English brother-in-law, who shivered and hugged his arms to his lanky body. “I hope you packed a warmer coat because I
heard we’re supposed to have a white Christmas this year,” David said.

The door opened and slammed, and Henry marched down the porch steps.

“Here’s
Daed
.” David sent an uneasy glance Kellan’s way as Henry moved toward them. “
Daed
, would you like to join —?”

“David, help me get my horse hitched up,” Henry said, pushing past him into the barn.

David glanced at Kellan, who shrugged.

“Daed
?” David followed him into the barn. “You’re leaving?”

“
Ya
, I am.” Henry led his horse from the stall. “I’d appreciate your help getting the horse readied.”

David placed his hand on his arm to stop him. “Why are you going?”

Henry narrowed his eyes. “I think you know why.” He pushed past David with the horse in tow.

David followed him out of the barn toward the buggy. “Why can’t you stay and visit?”

Henry glanced at Kellan on his way to the buggy. “You know why.” He hitched the horse to the buggy.

David glanced at Kellan and found him scowling.

“It’s all right,” David said. “I’ll talk to him.”

“There’s no need to talk to me,” Henry said. “I’ve already told your
mamm
to come out here so we can go home.”

“You can’t do that to
Mamm
,” David said. “Didn’t you see
Mamm’s
face when she saw Anna Mae was here? This means so much to her. Taking her away from Anna Mae is wrong.”

Henry faced him, shaking a finger in his face. “It’s not your place to tell me what’s right and what’s wrong.”

David threw his hands up in frustration. “Anna Mae made her decision to leave and was shunned. But you and I both know that shunning tradition dictates that we can’t eat at the same table as she does and we can’t conduct business with her. It says nothing about visiting with her, which is what we were doing in the house.” He gestured toward the house. “Leaving isn’t necessary, and it’s not right to do that to
Mamm
or Anna Mae.”

“You have no right to judge me, son.” Henry finished hitching the horse and glanced toward the house. “It’s written: ‘for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.’”

David narrowed his eyes, challenging him. “What about that verse in Colossians: ‘Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.’”

“Where’s your
mamm
?” Henry asked, keeping his eyes averted from David’s stare.

“You should go without her,” David said, resentment bubbling up inside him. “I’ll bring her home or she can stay here tonight.”

“You stay out of this.” Henry started toward the house. “I’ll go find her.”

David turned and found Kellan standing alone, his face rigid.

“I’m so sorry,” David apologized. “I don’t understand why he’s making more of this than it is.” David leaned against
the barn door and watched the snowflakes land on the fence posts. “Anna Mae made her choice and he’s not going to change that. It’s obvious that you and Anna Mae are happy.”

Kellan spoke slowly. “I know it was risky to come here, but Anna Mae really wanted to see her family again. I just hope this doesn’t break her heart.” He gave a slight nod toward the porch where Mary Rose and Henry were descending the steps. “I’ll stay here until they’ve left,” he said. “I don’t want to cause any more trouble.”

David stepped over toward his parents, and the hurt and sadness in his mother’s eyes nearly broke his heart.

Before speaking in
Dietsch
, David took a deep breath, hoping to calm his frayed nerves. “You don’t have to leave,
Daed
. No one will think less of you as a bishop if you visit with Anna Mae.”

Mary Rose gave Henry a hopeful look, while Henry kept his eyes trained on the horse.

“I cannot stay here,” Henry declared before climbing into the buggy.

David frowned, but he knew from his father’s tone of voice that arguing would do no good. Bending down, he hugged Mary Rose. “I’m sorry the evening had to end this way,” he whispered to her. “Kathryn had hoped that
Daed
would see the visit as an opportunity to mend the family.”

“It’s not your fault,” she whispered. “Your
daed
is a stubborn old mule.
Gut nacht
.” She then climbed into the buggy.

David stood alone as they rode off through the swirling flurries.

Anna Mae wiped her cheeks with a napkin. “I guess I was wrong to think my coming here would be a joyous reunion with my parents.”

“No, you weren’t wrong.” Kathryn’s eyes were full of concern. “I thought your
daed
would be so overwhelmed with happiness to see you that he would welcome you with a hug and a prayer of thanksgiving.”

Anna Mae shook her head. “It’s no use. He won’t ever accept me.”

“Don’t say that.” Kathryn rubbed Anna Mae’s shoulder. “God will change his mind. I can feel it.”

Kellan burst into the room, rushed to the table, and crouched beside Anna Mae. “Are you okay?” He took her hand in his.

Anna Mae nodded. “I’m fine. Just disappointed.” The worry in his eyes caused hers to tear up again.

“I don’t know what your father was saying in that Pennsylvania Dutch, but I could tell he was angry that we were here.” He shook his head. “It doesn’t make sense to me. You came to visit him, and he left in a huff.”

“He’s hurt that she left the faith,” Kathryn said. “It’s painful for a parent when the child leaves the community.”

Kellan shook his head. “She was a grown woman and it was her choice. I didn’t want to steal her away. I left it up to her, and she chose me.”

“Let’s not go through this all again,” Anna Mae said. “What’s done is done, and I let him and the rest of my family and the community down. I thought that by coming here we could work things out, but he couldn’t stand to stay in the same house with me. He didn’t want my mother to stay
either. I couldn’t convince her to stay and visit with me. She followed him outside.”

“We should go home.” Kellan stood. “We’ll go back to the bed and breakfast and pack up our things.”

“No,” Anna Mae said with more force than she’d planned. “I can’t give up now. I’m already here.”

Kellan placed a hand on her abdomen. “But the baby. The stress your father is causing could hurt the baby.”

“I’m feeling fine. I’ve been resting, so there’s nothing to worry about.” Anna Mae averted her eyes by staring at the wood grain of the table.

Kellan put a hand on her shoulder. “We should go home and plan to visit later, after the baby is here. Maybe next spring. The weather will be better and you and the baby will be ready to travel.” He took her hand and lifted her to her feet. “Let’s go say goodbye to everyone and head home.”

Kathryn touched Kellan’s shoulder. “Don’t give up on Henry yet. He’s a stubborn man, but he has a deep faith in God. Give him a chance to adjust to seeing you and Anna Mae together.”

Kellan raked his hand through his brown hair and turned to Anna Mae.

She studied his eyes and silently prayed he’d agree with Kathryn. “We’ve come all this way,” she whispered, taking his hands in hers. “Won’t you give him another chance?”

“Give him another day,” Kathryn said. “If it doesn’t work out, then David and I will come and visit you this spring.”

“You will?” Anna Mae smiled as joy filled her heart. “You’ll come see us?”

“
Ya
, we will,” she said. “David had suggested that we visit you this spring instead of you coming here for Christmas.”

“Oh, that would be lovely!” Anna Mae hugged her. “We’d love to have you visit, right, Kellan?”

Kellan nodded. “Anytime you want to come, you’re welcome in our home.”

“I hope I didn’t get you in too much trouble with David by coming out for Christmas,” Anna Mae said. “I hate that you went against his wishes.”

Kathryn shrugged. “It wasn’t the first time that I followed my heart instead of David’s suggestions.”

Anna Mae laughed. “No, it certainly wasn’t.”

Kathryn’s expression became serious. “Join us for lunch at your parents’ house tomorrow at noon, and we’ll try one more time. If it doesn’t work out, then we’ll take it from there. You’ve come too far to give up this easily.”

“Lunch at my parents’ house?” Anna Mae asked. “Who will be there?”

“Just David and our immediate family,” Kathryn explained. “It’s our turn with them since the rest of David’s siblings planned to see them on other days to have their Christmas celebrations. You know how hectic it gets this time of year. We put our word in for Christmas Eve first.”

Anna Mae nodded and let the words process. Christmas Eve with her parents. She could be strong; she could do this. She turned to Kellan. “Does that sound okay to you? We’ll try lunch tomorrow.”

Kellan sighed. “I’ll go along with it on one condition.”

Anna Mae nodded. “What’s your condition?”

He put a fingertip under her chin and angled her face so
that she was staring directly into his warm eyes. “I won’t stay here if the stress is too much for you and our baby. If things take a turn for the worse, then we will leave. Do you agree with me?”

Overwhelmed by the love in his eyes, Anna Mae nodded as more tears filled her eyes. “Yes,” she whispered.

“Then we have a deal.” He kissed the top of her head. “I’ll let you ladies talk a few minutes while I go say goodbye to your brother. We shouldn’t stay too late. You and the baby need your rest.” He then headed out of the kitchen.

“He really loves you,” Kathryn said.

Anna Mae sighed. “I just wish my father would see that.”

David hung up his coat and blew out a sigh. Turning, he spotted Kellan coming from the kitchen. “How is Anna Mae?” he asked.

“As well as can be expected,” Kellan said. “May I talk to you a minute?”

David waved his hand toward the quiet family room. The children had gone upstairs to get ready for bed. Sinking into a rocker, David patted the chair next to him. “Have a seat.”

“Don’t mind if I do.” Kellan lowered himself onto the chair and jammed his hands in his pockets. “What a night, huh?”

David kept his eyes fixed on the flames crackling in the fireplace. “
Ya
, I reckon it has been.”

“There’s something I need to ask you,” Kellan said.

David faced him. “What is it?”

“I didn’t understand much of what your dad said out by
the barn earlier since he was speaking Pennsylvania Dutch. But, at the same time, I’m not stupid. From what I deduced, he wants Annie and me to leave, right?” Kellan’s expression was serious but also sad.

Suddenly David felt as if he’d been transported back in time. Once again, he was trapped in the middle between his father’s strict Amish ways and Anna Mae’s choice to leave the community.

“You don’t have to sugarcoat it, David,” Kellan continued. “I’ll take it like a man.”

“My father wasn’t happy you and Anna Mae were here,” David began, facing him. “He didn’t say that he wanted you to leave, but he did say he couldn’t stay here.”

“I told Annie that we should go home, but she’s insisting on staying through tomorrow to see if she can smooth it over.” Kellan shook his head, frowning. “I’m concerned the visit is going to be too stressful if it keeps going the way it is. While the doctor said that it was safe for us to make this trip, I’m worried the stress of all of this might hurt her or the baby.”

David absently rubbed his beard as worry filled him. “I hadn’t thought about that.”

Kellan leaned back on the chair. “I just don’t understand it. How can a father treat his child that way? It doesn’t make sense to me. Annie made her choice when she married me and it was
her
choice. I didn’t force her to leave your community. In fact, I asked her several times if she was certain she wanted to give up this life for me, and every time I asked, she insisted she was.”

“I knew that
Daed
would have trouble welcoming Anna
Mae,” David said. “I warned Kathryn, but she insisted on arranging this visit.”

Kellan shook his head and held his hands palms up. “I don’t understand it. Annie and I have been married almost three years. We’re expecting our first child and we’re happy. She’s everything to me and she tells me I’m everything to her. She’s not coming back here or going to join your church again, but she wants to be a part of the Beiler family. Why can’t Henry accept that?”

David shook his head. “I don’t think you understand my father’s point of view. He was deeply hurt when Anna Mae left. We know that once a member of the community has left, it’s rare that she comes back, and it’s devastating for the parents. On top of that, it’s more complicated than that for my father. He’s the bishop, and I’m certain he feels like he failed as a father and leader of the church because she chose to leave.”