Authors: Jorie Saldanha
“Well, I don’t know if that’s true, but there are a lot of Bob’s in this place we call Earth.”
“Are you going philosophical on me, or something?” I asked.
“No. I’m just talking about my Uncle Bob in women’s lingerie, surfing the net for chicks.”
“That’s disgusting! You actually have family like that?” I stuck out my tongue in revulsion.
“Hey, doesn’t every family have a freak of nature in their family?” “Well…” I said.
“Admit it, every family has someone in it with a screw loose.”
“I guess that’s true,” I concurred.
“And besides, just because he’s a weird perve doesn’t mean what he’s doing is illegal. He never actually meets these girls…I don’t think.” Adam took another bite out his apple.
“Okay, let’s change the subjects fast!” I said. “So, are you saying that my plan is a bad idea?”
“No.” Adam looked at me sympathetically, putting his arm around my shoulders while I looked at him affectionately. “I’m saying it’s a horrible idea.”
“Hey!” I shoved his arm away from me.
“Come on,” He burst into laughter. “You’ve got to give me cool points for that. You have to admit it was quite the burn!”
“Cool points? Are we on Ghetto Feud now?” I joked.
“Come on admit it!” Adam continued as if he hadn’t heard me.”
“I don’t have to admit anything. Hey, do you have any single friends? I seem to be on the market again.” I sneered, teasingly.
“Now that…wasn’t funny.” Adam grabbed a box of Fruit Loops, and he started eating right out of the box with his bare hands. What a pig. He sleeps in and then he eats like a barbarian who has never seen food before in his life.
“Oh, I disagree, I think that mine was quite the burn,” I imitated his voice. “Anyway, you don’t think we can catch Lena doing something underhanded?”
“I just don’t think that it will get her kicked off of the squad. I think we need to do something where we get her to confess to all of it over the intercom at school. That way everyone hears her and decides to hate her.” Adam accidentally spit out a few Fruit Loops as he spoke.
“Oh, please! There’s a lot of things wrong with that plan.”
“Like what,” Adam said between chewing and swallowing.
“First, everyone already hates Lena.”
“Second?” Adam egged me on.
“Second, that’s so a scene from a teenie-bopper movie!”
“Is not!” He crossed his arms defiantly. “If anything it’s from a romantic comedy, or something.”
“No! You’re a closet chick-flick watcher! I knew it! I knew there was something different about you.” I pointed my finger at him.
“I never said that! I never ever said anything close to that at all!” Adam put his hands up in defense.
“Whatever. We both have pretty much the same idea. Let’s just deal with Tom then. You said Hank has recordings from every game?” I asked.
“That’s right. Oh, and he’s got a couple of shots where you can see clearly that Tom is cheating.”
“Perfect!” I gave him a kiss.
“I like this. Why don’t we do this more often?” Adam asked me.
“Because you always make such a huge deal out of it. If you left it alone for a little while, I might kiss you more,” I told him.
“Okay. Don’t ever kiss me then.” Adam winked.
“I’m not talking about reverse psychology you loser!” I smirked. “And that doesn’t work on me either!”
“Awwww man. A guy can always hope, right?” He hugged me.
“You’re such a geek!” I nudged him. “Well, let’s get to work on this DVD then, shall we?”
“Good idea, Captain.” Adam saluted me. “Operation Visual Embarrassment is about to commence.”
“You’ve been watching Charlie’s Angels again, haven’t you?” I giggled.
“I’m shocked and offended at these accusations!” Adam gasped.
“Fine, then what have you been watching?” I asked.
“Did I say you were wrong?” Adam gave me a sheepish grin.
“You’re such an idiot!” I told him.
“You know, all your insults…they hurt. They hurt me right here.” Adam gave me a mock serious face and put his hand on his heart.
“You’re such a liar!”
“Do you see what I mean? All this abuse? It stings me. It stings me real bad right here.”
“Cut it out!” I chuckled.
“No, that’s what you did to my heart, babe. You cut it out.”
“No, I’m serious. Stop it!” I laughed harder.
“I can’t stop the pain. It’s all your doing anyway.” Adam took his finger from his eye and ran it down his cheek like a tear. “You make me cry.”
“I do not. Now can we get down to business, please?”
“Oh, dirty!” Adam smiled flirtatiously.
“You have one sick mind, do you know that?” I smiled in reply.
“I’m a guy.”
“Is that all you have to say for yourself?” I asked.
“Well, I think it’s pretty self-explanatory. Don’t you?”
“That’s not what I asked. I asked if that’s all you had to say for yourself. And if that’s all you actually do have to say for yourself, well, then I’m dating a dork.”
“Did I ever say that I wasn’t a dork? I don’t believe that I ever said I was a non-dork.” Adam defended himself.
“Hey, now you’re making up words!” I said. “It looks like I’m rubbing off on you!”
“It seems that way, doesn’t it?”
“Can I ask you something, Adam?” I looked up at him intently.
“Whatever your heart desires!” Adam sat down on the only piece of furniture in his family room; it was a couch.
“Why are you and Hank having problems?” I sat down next to him.
“We’re not.” Adam looked at me, “Now let’s make this DVD.”
“Okay.” I grinned.
Adam and I spent the entire afternoon making the best DVD that we could. There was no way that he wouldn’t get kicked off of the team. He had done some very bad things, and it was about time that he dealt with the consequences. It took Adam and me forever because half of the time we were either talking or kissing. By the time we were finished with the final copy of the DVD, it was time for me to go home.
“Well, I think we made a great DVD.” I told him.
“We made a DVD? I just remember having a good time with my sexy girlfriend.” Adam gave me a lopsided grin.
“That’s all you ever think about.” I laughed, and then said, “Well, I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Alright.” Adam gave me a good-bye kiss. Then I left. Halfway home, I realized that I had forgotten the DVD. I headed back to Hank’s to pick it up. Somewhere in that time, Adam must have taken the DVD and gone upstairs. Then Hank must have asked him to go into the den and talk with him. When I got there no one was answering the door, so I let myself in. I yelled hello, but no one heard me. I listened for a reply, but all I heard was a loud bickering between Adam and Hank. I looked on the couch and in the family room for the DVD, but it was nowhere to be found.
“Adam must have taken it upstairs with him.” I said to myself. I headed up the stairs.
“Hello?” I walked into the doorway where I saw Adam and Hank. They were too busy yelling at each other to notice me though.
“Don’t you get it? We have to go this Saturday,” Hank yelled.
“They said that I had until the end of this year.”
“Yeah, as long as you were with me. My job won’t let me work for them if I don’t get there by next Monday.”
“Then go there on Monday and come get me later,” Adam said to me.
“You know I can’t do that. We talked about this last week. You were supposed to get everything straightened out, say good-bye to everyone, and then we’d go without any problems,” Hank replied, angered.
“You act as if this is just some little solution that can be solved without any problems.”
“Well, it should. You told me yourself that you didn’t have any special ties. You said that it wouldn’t be that hard to leave. You said that you didn’t want a guardian because you liked keeping your options open.” Hank prodded.
“I know. It’s just, well, I don’t think… I can’t do that now!” Adam yelled.
“Would you just break up with her? I can’t take it anymore. I’ve had to make sacrifices too, you know! You’re not the only one who’s getting the raw deal here. If this is about Ashley, then you need to stop worrying. She’s just a girl. There are plenty of them where we’re going. Don’t you get that? She’s totally replaceable!”
“What makes you say that?” Adam stormed.
“Why are you in this mess anyway? Because you turned yourself in! Who talked you into turning yourself in? Ashley! That’s who! Do you want to keep a connection with the very person who got you into this?” Hank retorted.
“So what, are you asking me to sever all relations that I ever had with Ashley?” Adam asked incredulously.
“That’s exactly what I’m asking you to do. If I have to change my entire life for you, I think that’s the least you can do for me,” Hank finished.
“Fine,” Adam said without any feeling. How could he just agree to stop seeing me as if he were giving up meat or something?
“Is that really how the two of you see me?” I asked, feeling numb from head to toe.
“Ashley!” Hank and Adam spoke together.
“What are you doing back here?” Adam asked, walking towards me.
“I came here for the DVD. I left it here. Can I have it?” I tried to stay calm.
“It’s on the coffee table by the door.” Adam moved towards me.
“I hope you both have a great trip,” I spat out with venom, running down the stairs. I grabbed the DVD and opened the door with fierce speed, trying to escape as quickly as I could. I could hear Adam calling my name.
“Ashley! Ash! Wait!”
“No!” I screamed, about to slam the door shut, but a force stopped me from closing the door. Adam had reached the door in time.
“Ash, don’t leave. Let me explain.”
“Oh, like I haven’t heard that line before. How many times am I supposed to let you hurt me?” I asked.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you. You weren’t supposed to hear that,” Adam admitted.
“Weren’t supposed to hear that? Who cares if I wasn’t
supposed
to hear it; I did. And you know what? You should never have said any of those things! That conversation up there should never have taken place!”
“I completely agree! It shouldn’t have. I shouldn’t be moving. I can understand that you don’t want me to go,” Adam replied, reaching for my hand.
“What do think I’m mad about? The fact that you’re leaving?” I yanked my hand away.
“What else?” Adam inquired.
“I’ll tell you! You didn’t even stand up for me when that jerk was talking about me. You let Hank blame everything you’ve been going through on me! He talked about how I was replaceable. And you let him go on and on about how I wasn’t necessary. You didn’t take any of the heat. You just let him talk and talk!” I shouted.
“What was I supposed to do? Tell him off? Tell him that you didn’t talk me into going to the police station?”
“Do you mean to tell me that you don’t take any responsibility for the predicament that you’re in? Was I there when you stole the money?”
“Well no, but…”
“Was I there when you took it and tried to return it? Was I there? Did I help you steal the money? No! You did all that on your own. You didn’t have me to tell you that you needed to steal that money. What gives you any right to put any of the blame on me? If you didn’t want to turn yourself in, you didn’t have to!” I screamed.
“You said you wouldn’t go out with me unless I did,” Adam yelled back.
“You didn’t have to do anything that you didn’t want to. Just because I asked you to didn’t mean that you had to. I didn’t make you go in!” My eyes were ablaze.