A Loving Family (33 page)

‘It's nice to dream.' Rosa pulled up a chair and sat down. ‘I wonder what Kit has to say to us that is so important?'

Stella's hand shook as she placed the bread on the table. ‘I don't know, but it sounded quite serious.'

‘It is.' Kit entered the room towelling his hair. His clean shirt clung to his damp chest, emphasising his broad shoulders and narrow waist. Stella averted her eyes. Sensations that she had never experienced before felt like flames consuming her body. She seized a knife and hacked thick slices off the hot loaf. ‘Are you hungry, Kit?'

He shook his head. ‘Not yet, Stella. Sit down. I have something to say that concerns both of you.'

She sank down on the nearest chair, hoping that he could not hear her heart pounding against her stays. ‘What is it? What's wrong?'

‘Yes, Kit,' Rosa said, taking a seat next to Stella. ‘Why the serious expression? Surely this is a day to celebrate?'

‘Not quite.' He pulled up a chair. ‘Uncle Gervase visited me in prison yesterday. Don't look so scared, Stella, he didn't threaten to kill me. Or not directly, I suppose.'

‘What are you talking about?' Rosa demanded. ‘Are you feverish? I've heard about jail fever,' she added, turning to Stella with an anxious frown. ‘It's a terrible affliction. We should send for a doctor.'

Kit held up his hand as Stella was about to leap to her feet. ‘I'm not feverish. He was almost reasonable; in fact I think your threats had a greater effect on him than you could have imagined. He knows how we're fixed financially and he assumed, quite rightly, that I've used up a great deal of my inheritance from Uncle Silas in my attempts to challenge Father's will.'

‘Get to the point, Kit,' Rosa said, unconsciously echoing Stella's thoughts.

‘To be brief, he's offered to buy me a commission in the Army if I'll give up my claim to the estate.'

‘But that's not right,' Stella said angrily. ‘It's your home, and Rosa's too.'

‘If I agree to accept his offer he's promised to make me his heir. He plans to divorce your mother, Stella, which would set her free to marry a man of her choosing.'

‘Do you trust him to keep his word?' Stella said slowly. ‘How do we know that he won't change his mind once you are committed to the military?'

‘He still believes that your mother remembers the names of all the dignitaries who attended his parties. I think you can trust him on that score.'

Rosa leaned across the table to lay her hand on his arm. ‘But the Army, Kit? You could be killed. There's talk of another war in Afghanistan if the Russian mission fails. Sir Percy was talking about it over dinner one evening.'

‘That's the risk that all military men have to take, but at least I'd be doing something for my country instead of wasting my time and money in gaming hells and drinking myself to oblivion. I'm not proud of what I've become in my effort to regain our old home, and this gives me a chance to atone for what I've put you through.'

‘And what about us?' Rosa demanded tearfully. ‘What happens to Stella and me while you're playing at soldiers?'

He curled his fingers around her hand. ‘You'll be safe here with Perry and Spike to look after you. I'll arrange for most of my pay to be allotted to you. You won't have to make paper flowers for any more undertakers, Rosa. You'll be able to live like a young lady again.'

She jumped up to fling her arms around him. ‘Do you have to do this, Kit? Isn't there an easier way?'

He eased her gently back onto her chair. ‘The war between us and Uncle Gervase had to stop sometime. This seems as good a solution as any and it will avoid a scandal that would disgrace the family name.' He turned to Stella with a smile. ‘I hope you'll stay here with Rosa. I don't know what she'd do without you.'

Her throat constricted and her eyes stung with unshed tears. ‘Of course,' she murmured. ‘I'll stay as long as she needs me.'

‘And you can bring your mother and sister here,' he added enthusiastically. ‘This old house has plenty of room for all, including Aunt Maud and her wretched cat.' He stood up, rubbing his chin. ‘Now I need a shave as I've got an appointment with the Army. Apparently Uncle Gervase was at Eton with Major-General Roberts, which should be a distinct advantage if all we read about him in the newspapers is accurate.' He sauntered out of the room, whistling a tune from
HMS Pinafore
.

‘Well I never did,' Rosa said, throwing up her hands. ‘Who would have thought it?'

Stella wiped her eyes on her apron. ‘My grandparents died in the Crimean War. If only there was another way.'

‘But you can get your family back together again, Stella. Think of that.'

‘Let's wait and see. Maybe Kit won't be able to buy a commission, or he might not be sent abroad.'

Rosa gave her a steady look. ‘You're very fond of my brother, aren't you, Stella?'

She forced her lips into a smile. ‘Of course I am. I love you both.'

Kit succeeded in procuring a commission in the 4th Hussars and soon after the final fitting for his uniform he received instructions to attend the cavalry depot in Canterbury, where he would receive training under the direction of the riding master.

The evening before he was due to leave for Kent he took them all to a chophouse for a celebratory meal. Spike was allowed to drink beer, becoming so tipsy that Rosa and Perry decided to take him home, leaving Kit to escort Stella back to Fleur-de-Lis Street. It was a fine September evening but there was a hint of autumn chill in the air as dusk gobbled up the city streets and noisy flocks of starlings congregated on the roofs of buildings, seeking places to roost for the night.

‘You will be all right, won't you?' Kit said, tucking her hand into the crook of his arm. ‘I want you to bring your mother and sister to London. You can stay in the house indefinitely.'

‘Thank you.'

‘You've been very quiet all evening, Stella. Are you all right?'

She looked straight ahead, not daring to meet his gaze even though she could feel him staring at her. ‘I'm sorry to see you go.' The words tumbled from her lips before she could stop them. She had intended to remain slightly aloof and detached from the pain she felt in her heart. She was losing him to the Army and the people he might meet socially, who would be of a very different class from herself. He would have the pick of officers' daughters and he would forget he ever knew the servant girl from Limehouse Hole.

He came to a halt, turning her to face him. ‘You haven't seemed to care one way or the other. All these weeks I've been hoping you might give a sign that you would miss me.'

‘Miss you?' Her voice broke on a suppressed sob. ‘I feel as though my life's blood is draining away with each day that brings our parting closer.'

‘My God.' He gazed into her eyes, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of her shoulders. ‘Why did you never tell me?'

‘How could I? You don't care that you're leaving me – I mean us – it's been obvious that you can't wait to join the Army and live the life you've chosen. I – I mean we – don't count.'

He gave her a gentle shake, his eyes glowing with surprise and delight as if he had just witnessed a miracle. ‘You couldn't be more wrong. I've never said anything to you because I didn't want to take advantage of your situation. I'm not like my uncles. I don't grab things because I think it's my right to take. I wanted you to give some sign that you cared for me, just a little, before I spoke.'

‘I do care,' she whispered. ‘I care more than a little.'

He drew her into his arms and crushed her lips in a kiss that answered all her questions and told her more than mere words. When he finally allowed her to draw breath he still held her close. ‘I thought you were in love with that farmer fellow you told us about. You always spoke so fondly of the whole family, and you trusted them to care for your mother and sister.'

‘Don't forget Aunt Maud and Timmy,' Stella said, smiling up at him. ‘I was never in love with anyone until I met you, and then I thought it was hopeless.'

‘You couldn't have been more mistaken. It seems we've been at cross purposes all these months, Stella my love.'

‘Am I really your love?'

He answered her with a kiss, receiving a roar of approval from a group of men who staggered out of the pub on the corner. ‘Go to it, mate.'

Kit raised his hand in a brief salute. ‘Come on, Stella. This is no place to loiter. I must get you home.'

They walked on arm in arm. She shot him a covert look. ‘You won't leave now, will you, Kit?'

He tightened his grasp. ‘I'm afraid there's no going back, and I wouldn't want to. I've been a dreamer and a bit of a waster all these years and now I want to make something of myself, if only for you. I want you to be proud of me, my love. I don't want to slip back into my old ways and break your lovely heart.'

‘Don't be silly,' she said sharply, a finger of fear running down her spine. ‘I'd never think ill of you. I want us to be together.'

‘And we will, eventually.' He stopped beneath a gas lamp, his eyes searching her face with an expression of wonderment as if each second he found something new and infinitely precious to love and admire. ‘You must understand, Stella. I have to do this, and I couldn't get out of it even if I wanted to. I've bought into the British Army and I'd probably have to buy myself out if I left before my time was up.'

She was suddenly cold. The harvest moon overhead might have been shining down on snow instead of the dew-glossed cobblestones. The chill seemed to consume her whole being. ‘You choose the Army over me.'

‘No, of course not. I have no choice, please try to understand. But I will return.'

She turned away. Her heart was too full to allow reason to overcome emotion. ‘You say that, but it's just words. You might fall in love with the colonel's daughter or you might die in battle. Either way you'll be lost to me. If you leave tomorrow that will be the end of everything. I'm sorry, but I can't do this.' She broke free from him and ran home, ignoring his pleas for her to stop.

Kit left early next morning before the rest of the household had risen. Stella went about her daily routine trying hard to keep her feelings to herself, but Rosa was quick to note her distress. Perry and Spike had left for Lincoln's Inn Fields, where the archangel had been hired to investigate a client by one of his contacts, and Rosa was finishing her breakfast of tea and toast. She put down her cup with a clatter. ‘For heaven's sake cheer up, Stella. He's only gone to Canterbury. We'll see him again soon.'

Stella continued kneading bread dough. ‘I don't know what you mean.'

‘Yes, you do. It's obvious you have feelings for my brother and that he loves you.'

‘How did you know?'

Rosa's cheeks dimpled and she chuckled. ‘Any fool could see that you care for each other and it's just what Kit needed. He's pulled himself together and he's trying to make something of himself, instead of dabbling in the law and drinking himself to death. He's done it for you, Stella.'

‘And if he gets killed in battle I suppose you'll say he's done that for me.'

‘You mustn't think that way. All right, soldiers suffer fatalities, but we're not at war yet and it might never happen. In the meantime Kit is trying to make you proud of him. Can't you see that?'

‘Maybe, but it doesn't alter the fact that we're from different worlds, Rosa. For all that you and I are friends, as far as society is concerned I'm still a servant and you're a lady. It makes no difference that you find yourself in straitened circumstances: the gap between us will always be there.'

‘No,' Rosa said, rising to her feet. ‘I won't have that. You're my dear friend and we're in this together. I want you to travel into Essex, today if possible, and you're to bring your mother, Belinda and Aunt Maud back with you. As Kit said, we've plenty of room, and you've only to find your brother and your family will be complete.'

‘But we can't live off your charity, Rosa. I must find work first so that I can support them.'

‘The funeral parlour is still empty. I walked past there yesterday.'

‘What are you suggesting?'

‘Did Ronald have a wife and children? It's just possible that the premises might belong to your aunt.'

‘What would she do with it? She couldn't run an undertaking business, and neither could I.'

‘It's a shop for all that, Stella. It could change purpose and sell anything, even paper flowers. Think about it.'

Stella set the dough to prove, covering it with a damp cloth. ‘I suppose it wouldn't hurt to walk along the street and see if the owner has put a notice in the window. Maybe the widow, if there is one, is looking for someone to take over the lease.'

‘There you are,' Rosa said triumphantly. ‘Let's go for a walk. It's a fine day and I feel like doing something that will take my mind off Kit. I miss him too.'

The shop window was empty apart from a few dusty paper petals strewn on the floor. The purple curtains that shielded the interior of the funeral parlour from prying eyes hung limply and were lacy with moth holes. The paintwork outside was peeling and Clifford's name on the fascia was almost obliterated by grime. Stella was about to walk on when she realised that the door was slightly ajar. She gave it a gentle push and it swung open. ‘Is anyone there?' She stepped inside and found herself face to face with a tall, angular woman dressed in widow's weeds. ‘Who are you?' They both spoke at the same time.

The woman glared at her. ‘Have you no respect for the dead? Can't you see that the funeral parlour is closed?'

Rosa gazed at the chaotic scene with trestle tables upturned and a half-finished coffin lying on its side. Papers were strewn about the floor and cupboard doors left hanging by broken hinges. ‘What a mess,' she said in a low voice.