A Missing Peace (14 page)

“Don't!” he yelled.

I gasped as I stepped back. I had never seen Caleb so out of control, and I worried he would hurt himself.

In no time, he had forced himself up. “I'm going to Gade's. You can wait here or go home.”

That guy was Caleb's friend, but he said the name like he could put an axe through it.

He leaned over and kissed me on the forehead. “I'll see you later,” he said, heading for the stairs.

“Caleb, wait! You can't take those by yourself, and why are you going to Gade's?”

Something was missing from this equation.

“To. Kill. Him.”

He had made it to the top of the stairwell. I darted out of his room and grabbed his waist, pulling him backwards. I hadn't stopped to think yet. I'd been too concerned with keeping Caleb from rolling down the stairs, but I realized his friend fired the shot. Gade—the guy who sat on Caleb's couch while I was behind it—fired the shot. A shot meant for me.

I knew it was possible. The same guys could've still been—were most likely—here, but I never expected to have to cross paths with
him
again.

Caleb was upset that his friend killed his father. I needed to calm him down, keep him from doing something stupid, but at the moment I couldn't think.

“Gade?” I shrieked. “The guy that was here?” My stomach churned. I'd been in the same room with the man that killed
Baba
, that had tried to kill
me
.

“Don't worry.” Caleb's voice was hard as stone. “I'm going to kill him.”

“You can't just attack him.”

“Why the hell not?”

“Because you promised me you would find another way to know about it. You can't show up and beat the shit out of him. He'll know.”

“I'll beat the truth out of Gade, and when I confront Collins, I'll tell him Gade told me.”

“Caleb, you cannot go attack him. He's as big as you, carries a gun, and hasn't recently been hit by a car.”

“My physical therapist says if I use my leg, it could help with recovery.”

“Yeah, I think he means walking across the street with most of your weight on a golf club. Not using it to kick the crap out of some guy who could power lift two people and carries a gun.”

“Mirriam. I'm. Going,” his voice was firm.

He headed toward the stairs again, and this time I couldn't pull hard enough to stop him. I slid around him, pulled his arm over my shoulder with one hand and put my other hand around his waist. I took as much of his weight as I could—as much as he would let me.

He groaned in pain with each step like he did on the way up. One thing was different, though. He moved with a kind of fierce determination I'd never seen before, not even in people moving away from bombs and bullets back home. This side of Caleb was new to me, and while it could have picked a better time to surface, I liked it. All the same, you didn't have to be a doctor to know he shouldn't have been moving around like this yet.

We were halfway down the stairs, and time was running out. I had to come up with a way to keep him from going to Gade's. Caleb at Gade's could only equal disaster.

“Caleb, don't do this. Please?” I'd never pleaded with anyone like this before.

“Mirriam, I'm going. Drop it.”

“If the situation were reversed, would you drop it?”

“If the situation were reversed, I wouldn't know about it until after it happened.”

Zmal.
He was probably right.

“I'm coming with you then.”

“What?”

“I'm coming with you.”

“No, you're not,” he shouted.

“You can't do this by yourself. You're already hurt.”

“I'll be fine.”

By now we had made it down the stairs, and I'd had enough. I couldn't bear the thought of Caleb facing this guy alone. He'd shot
Baba
and Caleb's father. He would have shot me. If he was lying about what happened, if they were all lying about what happened, the military didn't want the Millers to know. I didn't doubt for a second this guy would shoot Caleb, too. And get away with it.

I scooted away from him. If he fell, it was his problem. Maybe, then he'd understand why this was such a bad idea.

He stumbled forward a bit, grimacing as he caught his balance.

“Caleb Michael Miller, you are not doing this.”

He laughed.

I was seething now. “What?”

“You sounded like a Texan chick just then.”

“Oh my God, that is so not funny. Can you be serious for two seconds? You can't do this. If you piss him off, he's going to shoot you. He's lying about what happened. They've all lied about what happened. Don't you think there's a reason for that?”

“Then why did you tell me?”

“I expected you to come up with another way of finding the truth like I told you, because now all you have to do is confirm it and make them pay.”

“They're going to pay all right.”

“Think about your mother.”

“Don't do that.”

“You're all she has.”

“M, stop this.”

“What about me? I
need
you.” A simple truth I preferred to stay unsaid, but I was terrified of what would happen to Caleb if he showed up at Gade's ready for a fight.

He let out a breath. A moment passed between us in silence. Finally, Caleb closed the distance I'd put between us, cupped my face, and kissed me. “I'll be back soon. I promise, and I'll call you.”

“You'll lead them to me—to my family, you know.” I played the guilt card.

“I'll make sure nothing happens to you or your family. I'll protect you, Mirriam. Trust me, please?”

I sighed. “Well, you can't go alone anyhow.”

“I have to do this alone.”

I crossed my arms in front of my chest. “You can't drive.”

“Fine. Drive, but stay in the car. I mean it, Mirriam.” Urgency rang in his voice. Caleb was worried, so he knew there was something to worry about, and he still planned to do this—alone.

Caleb

Thankfully, it was dark. She didn't lay her seat down like she did before. For not knowing where she was going and having driven in the U.S. exactly once before, she did well. She zigged and zagged, and we were there before I knew it, but not soon enough. “Stay in the car,” I said as she pulled into the parking lot. “Keep it locked, and if things get bad, get down.”

I had the passenger door open before the jeep stopped, and I was ready to get out. Mirriam parked the car, and I moved quickly for a guy with broken ribs, a strained back, and a bad leg. It was adrenaline. I knew. Which meant I had to do this soon, before the adrenaline faded and the pain returned. “Stay in the car,” I shouted over my shoulder as I moved toward his door. “Keep it locked, and if things get bad, get on the floorboard.”

There was no point in telling her this. The girl had lived in a war zone. She'd survived a bombing and a shooting within five minutes of each other. She knew what to do. Whether she would do it was another question.

I pounded on Gade's door so hard my fist hurt.

“What the hell?” I heard his voice but not steps coming to the door.

“Damn it, Gade, let me in, or I swear I'll break it down. Car wreck or not, I can tear this piece of shit off.”

“Caleb, have you been drinking?” Something told me I would regret this, but I took a few steps until I stood sideways in front of the door. I got ready to put my shoulder through it, when it swung open.

The murderer stood right in front of me. I pounded my fist into his face before he knew what was coming. Blood gushed from his nose, but he hadn't struck back yet. He was shocked. He had no idea that I knew. I pounded him a second time and a third.

He was about to hit the floor, and I'd be able to kick his good-for-nothing ass. But at the last minute, he steadied himself and grabbed my arm. “Miller, I know you have broken bones. I don't want to hurt you, but I will.”

“Go for it.” With my free arm, I swung at him again.

He maneuvered to miss my punch. “What the hell is this about?”

I kept swinging. “If you think hard enough, I bet you know.” Shithead. He really thought he would get away with it. That I would never find out.

“Miller, what the hell is goin' on?”

“You killed him.”

If I'd doubted M for a second, I knew the truth now, because Gade dropped my arm and dodged my fist. Through the blood covering his face, I could see his mouth drop open.

“Who told you?”

Oh shit. I can't lead him back to Mirriam.
“You did. You drunk dialed me.” I didn't say when and it was a fair bet he'd been drunk recently, but I really hoped it was in the last day or so. Gade knew me well enough to know that when I heard that, I'd be here to break his door down in minutes.

“Come on, man. I was drunk. How could you believe that?”

Busted.
“You didn't deny it. You didn't even have to ask what I'm talking about.” The anger boiled inside of me. He didn't even care. I lunged at him with both arms extended, hoping—trying with everything I had—to catch his neck. “You were gonna shoot a kid? A girl?” My girl.

Silence.

“How did you know that?”

Shit, Caleb, quit talking.
“Part of your drunk confession.”

Another beat of silence passed before Gade said, “She was a doctor's kid. Collins ordered her dad shot thinkin' he was a terrorist and then the girl, because she went crazy.”

“Yeah, go figure. You killed her dad right in front of her.”

“The point is when he found out he was wrong, Collins freaked. He briefed us on what to say, and we did. All the reports confirmed Michael was shot by enemy fire in a routine encounter. I don't know what you're planning to do with this information, but no one will believe you. I wouldn't push it too far. Collins
is
the base commander now.”

Right.
He got promoted for his efforts overseas. Killing my dad.

“I could just kill your sorry ass and make it look like a suicide.”

“Don't you think I feel bad?”

“Don't
you
think
I
feel bad? Do you know how many times he told me you were nothing but trouble, and I ignored it? Then when you realized you were such a screw job there was nothing you could do with your life,
I'm
the one that begged him to get you in the army. The only way he could do it was to agree to keep you out of trouble.” As the words came out, I realized they were true. I'd killed my dad.

“I'm sorry, man,” Gade said.

“Not as sorry as I am. God, if I'd listened, he'd still be here.”

“I'm sorry, Caleb.”

“Quit saying that. I tried to help you, and you killed my dad. If you were sorry, you would have never pulled the trigger.”

“You know what happens in a war zone, when you don't follow orders?”

I didn't answer. I didn't know. My dad always tried to keep those details from me, but more than that, I didn't care.

“It's kill or be killed. Be glad you got hit by a car. You don't want this life.”

I shrugged. “I don't feel sorry for you. It's better than the one my dad has. I know you don't want Collins to find out about your drunk confession, but I'm payin' him a visit. Get ready,” I said as I walked through the door.

“Caleb, don't. They'll throw me in the brigs.” Gade grabbed my arm. I snapped my arm, hitting him in the stomach with my elbow, but the motion hurt me as badly as it did him. I didn't let it show, though. I gritted my teeth and bit through the pain. “You think it doesn't matter, because it didn't happen here? What happens in Iraq stays in Iraq.” Gade didn't answer. “Touch me again and I will kill you.”

Silence.

“I'm going to bring your whole company down. If Collins has a problem with that, I'll bring the whole base down.”

“Don't be stupid.”

I limped out of the door unbothered by my pathetic wobble. Handicapped or not, I scared Gade.

As I headed toward the car, I found Mirriam crouching across the parking lot, a tire iron clutched in front of her. It was dark enough that Gade shouldn't have been able to see her from his door, but I looked over my shoulder to make sure he hadn't followed me.

“Are you crazy? What are you doing?” I snapped.

“You were getting loud in there. I was coming to help.”

“Do you ever listen?” I knew the answer to that. “Get back in the car before someone recognizes you.”

Mirriam

The sound of Caleb's ragged breath filled an otherwise silent car as we pulled out of the parking lot in front of Gade's apartment. I allowed my eyes to dart from the street to Caleb. He would never admit it, but he already regretted this. Not so much attacking Gade, but he'd used his muscles way too much today. He was in pain.

“Are you okay?”

“I'm cool.” His tone was anything but cool.

The drive home was short, so I gave up on trying to make conversation. But Caleb took me by surprise. Partly because
he
made conversation, but also because of what he asked. “That night at the library, you said it was safer for everyone that no one know where you are. Why? Gade is here. Why would it be safer for people in Iraq not to know where you are?”

Oh, that.
I swallowed past a lump in my throat. “The bomb at the hospital
was
planted by a terrorist. We don't know if that was the man on the steps or not, but there were terrorists there. One of them saw your dad trying to protect me and thought I was aiding the American military. He labeled me a traitor and followed me back to my village.
Ommy
wouldn't let anyone but family in and none of us out after what happened. But the guy started asking around about my schedule, and Abrahem's. He picked another high school girl thinking she would tell him. She lied and then told her mom as soon as she could. It's a small village, so word traveled fast. I had an uncle on the interim government, so he complained to someone and got us emergency refugee visas and plane tickets to Baltimore one day later.”