Authors: June Francis
‘You’re too soft. You always have been with him,’ said Mick.
‘No way,’ said Teddy, glaring at his brother. ‘You’re just saying that because you’re bloody jealous!’
‘Bloody jealous of what? Not you, you little pipsqueak!’
‘That’s enough!’ Kitty turned on them both with a wrathful expression. ‘Mind your language. Do you want the guests to hear?’
‘Guests! I’m sick of guests,’ lashed out Mick. ‘Why can’t we live in an ordinary house?’
‘What’s that got to do with anything?’ said Teddy. ‘This isn’t about guests! You’re just in a mood because you are jealous of me and Jeannie, whatever you might say.’ Suddenly the colour drained from his face and he sank onto a chair and closed his eyes.
‘The lad’s bone weary,’ said Hannah in a surprisingly gentle voice. ‘He needs his bed. I’ll put a hottie in it.’
‘Look at his face,’ said Monica, who was growing more like her sister Annie in appearance every day. She had her bright red hair and sharp little chin. ‘It’s all cut and he’s got stitches in it.’ She carried the tray over to the sink. ‘How did yer do that, Teddy?’
‘You’re as thick as two short planks asking him questions like that,’ said Celia scornfully, wiping her hands as she moved away from the sink. ‘It’s obvious he did it in the accident.’
Teddy blinked at his mother and said, ‘I wish you’d get them to all stop talking about me as if I wasn’t here.’
‘Never mind them talking about you,’ said Kitty, worrying about him all over again. ‘Bed! That’s where you’re going, me lad!’ She seized hold of his arm and chivvied him towards the door.
Those left behind in the kitchen exchanged looks. ‘The missus is real upset,’ said Hannah. ‘And the big fella was in a right twist when he went out this morning.’
‘D’you blame him?’ said Mick, folding his arms across his chest. ‘I feel like hitting our Teddy.’
‘You’re hard,’ said Celia, staring at him. It was an accident. An enormous pig came round a bend and they crashed right into it. He’s your brother! You should be glad he’s OK.’
Mick reddened. ‘I am glad he’s OK. But he’s been seeing her on the sly and that really gets my goat.’
The door opened and Ben came in with a relieved expression on his face. ‘Our Teddy’s home. Aren’t I glad! I was worried in case he might have really hurt himself and died.’
‘No chance of that,’ muttered Mick, brushing past him and slamming the door on his way out.
He went outside and stood on the front step, looking up at the sky. The moon appeared to be covered by a veil and he wondered with a tiny part of his mind how far away it was and if men would ever get there. He was deeply hurt and angry, not only with his brother, but also with Jeannie, his mother
and
Celia for turning on him. He felt if it had not been for the need to know how Jeannie was he could have walked out the hotel there and then and never come back.
‘Mick Ryan?’ A figure in the uniform of an able seaman of the Royal Navy had stopped at the bottom of the step.
‘Pete Curry?’
‘That’s right.’ Pete grinned. ‘Haven’t seen you since way back.’
‘Infants.’ Mick shook hands politely.
Pete stepped back and looked up at the hotel’s frontage. ‘How’s yer ma doing? I heard she got married again.’
‘She’s fine.’
‘And your brothers?’
‘OK.’ Mick did not want to talk about them. He did not want to talk at all but he forced himself. ‘How are you? How’s life on the briny?’
‘Not bad. Yer gerrabout and see places. I’ve been to Singapore.’
‘You’ll have to tell us about it one day.’
Pete’s bony face lit up. ‘How about the present? If yer gorra minute how about cumin’ for a pint?’
Mick was lost for words a moment and then he glanced up at the hotel frontage just as Pete had done and hated it. ‘You’ve twisted me arm,’ he said, and followed him down the Mount.
Kitty watched them go from the attic window, having heard their voices as she drew the curtains. Her heart ached for both her sons and there was a core of anger deep inside her which was directed against Jeannie. How she wished the girl had never come but it was too late to do anything about it now.
She moved away from the window and over to the bed where Teddy lay with his eyes closed. She looked at the stitches in the gash on his face and her mouth tightened. It seemed to her that John had not spared a thought for how he had suffered but only cared about Jeannie. The girl had been trouble, just as Hannah had prophesied.
Kitty went downstairs, hoping that nothing else would go wrong that evening but now she was also worried about Mick.
Her eldest son returned a couple of hours later and by then everyone else was in bed but Kitty. She sat in reception, making out a couple of bills. She eyed his unsteady figure as he came towards her up the lobby. He said with extreme care, ‘I’m not drunk.’
She put down her pen and came out from behind the reception desk and took his arm. ‘Let’s go upstairs.’
‘I’m not drunk,’ he repeated.
She smiled. ‘No. But I’d like your arm. I’m feeling tired out with everything that’s being going on and I don’t know if I can make it upstairs.’
‘You’re having me on,’ he articulated carefully.
‘Not in a thousand years,’ she said sadly and accompanied him upstairs and put him to bed.
The next morning Mick obviously had a head like nobody’s business, thought Kitty, having decided that she was not going to be soft with either of them. She mixed them both a glass of Andrew’s liver salts and handed it to them. ‘You’re both looking liverish,’ she said. ‘Drink this, have some toast when you come down and then get out to work.’
They groaned but she gave them a steely look and hissed, ‘Are you men or mice? Get working and think twice before you go behaving like idiots again.’
‘I haven’t done anything,’ moaned Mick. ‘Not compared to what he’s done.’
Kitty gave him another of her looks. ‘Don’t argue with me.’ She went over to Ben and Jack and shook them.
Teddy gulped down the fizzing drink before getting out of bed. ‘I don’t know what you were doing getting kaylied,’ he said to Mick. ‘It’s me that should have been getting drunk.’
‘Me heart bleeds for you,’ said Mick, holding his head up with one hand as he drank. ‘You’re a two-faced sod. Kidding us all that you didn’t have a motorbike anymore.’
‘I had to. The big fella would have put his oar in. He hates me.’
‘I don’t blame him,’ said Mick, shuddering as the liver salts reached his gut.
‘It’s a waste of time talking to you. For tuppence I’d leave home.’
‘Do that! The sooner the better,’ said Mick, pouring cold water from the jug on the washstand over his head into the basin and effectively bringing the conversation to an end.
All that morning Kitty expected to hear from John that he and Jeannie were coming home but just after lunch she received a telephone call from John saying that they were not discharging Jeannie yet and he would stay around until they did. Kitty told him to give Jeannie her best wishes and left it at that.
It was to be a week before John and Jeannie arrived back in Liverpool and she was taken straight to the Royal Infirmary.
‘She’s got septicaemia,’ said John, looking drawn and tired as he sat in front of the fire in the basement. ‘So much for your son’s reassurances that she was all right.’
‘I’m sorry, John.’ Kitty put an arm around his shoulders and rested her cheek against his hair. ‘It was an accident, though. He wasn’t to know that pig—’
‘Don’t mention that pig to me again,’ interrupted John. ‘For months they’ve been meeting behind my back. She told me so!’
‘I’m glad she’s taking part of the blame,’ murmured Kitty, moving away from him. ‘She deceived you as much as he did.’
‘I knew you’d stick up for him!’ said John, firing up. ‘Well, it’s not your daughter who’s lying in the Royal with blood poisoning. You might feel different if it was.’
‘I’m glad she’s not my daughter,’ retorted Kitty. ‘But it’s my son who’s moping around worrying himself to pieces because he loves her! Anyone would think you’ve led a spotless life instead of the one you have!’
He paled. ‘You don’t have to rub it in. I know I was to blame for Margaret’s death.’
‘Rubbish!’ exclaimed Kitty. ‘I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about young people being young and going their own way. About having fun!’
There was a silence and they stared at one another. Kitty’s heart softened. ‘Anyway, surely there’s something the doctors can do for Jeannie?’ she said in gentler tones. ‘Otherwise they wouldn’t have sent her to the Royal.’
‘They’re going to X-ray her leg. They can’t understand where the blood poisoning is coming from. What if she loses her leg, Kit? Or she dies? I’ll never forgive Teddy. Never!’ he said in a choking voice.
‘That’s unfair,’ she cried. ‘I know you’re upset but think how he’ll suffer if that were to happen.’
‘He probably won’t die of it, though, will he?’ said John bitterly, and getting up he walked out.
Kitty slumped down into an armchair and hoped that Jeannie would not die. What hope would there be of their family being united then?
When Teddy arrived home from work Kitty told him that Jeannie was back. Without waiting to eat, he went immediately to the hospital, hoping they would allow him to see Jeannie. ‘You’re too early for visiting,’ said a nurse. ‘Come back in half an hour.’
Teddy decided not to go home but walked as far as the Wesley chapel in Moss Street. He was so depressed the only thing he could think of doing was to pray, but when he got to the chapel he did not have the nerve to go in. He went back to the hospital only to be informed that Miss McLeod’s father was with her.
Teddy waited, watching other people going in and out of the ward. Twice he went and looked round the door and caught sight of the big fella sitting beside a bed but he blocked off any view Teddy might have had of Jeannie. Teddy felt angry and resentful but he did not want to make a fuss or cause Jeannie any distress by having a confrontation with her father. After another five minutes he tired of waiting and opened the door and walked swiftly up the ward.
Fortunately the big fella had his back to him and Teddy could see Jeannie in bed, propped up by several pillows. Her eyes were closed and there was a flush on her cheeks. Teddy was scared out of his wits. She couldn’t really be dying, could she? ‘Jeannie!’ he said loudly.
Her eyes opened and she pushed herself up on her elbows.
‘Out you!’ said John, getting to his feet and blocking them off from each other’s vision. ‘Haven’t you caused her enough pain?’
‘I love her!’ said Teddy desperately. ‘Didn’t you ever do anything you regretted? I didn’t want her hurt!’
‘But you have hurt her! She’s got blood poisoning and you know what that means.’
‘Let me see her,’ said Teddy, trying to dodge round him, but John grabbed him by the back of his collar and forced him the other way about.
‘What’s going on?’ The ward sister came rustling up.
‘Nothing for you to worry about, Sister. I’ll deal with this.’ John frogmarched a resisting-all-the-way Teddy out of the ward.
‘I’ve never known such behaviour!’ said the sister in a horrified voice. ‘Now if you don’t mind leaving—’
‘I’m leaving,’ said Teddy, finally managing to wrench himself out of John’s hold. ‘But I’ll be back.’
‘No, you won’t,’ said John, his expression uncompromising. ‘I’ll see to that.’
‘Neither of you will be allowed in,’ said the sister, quivering with rage. ‘Upsetting my patients. Now out!’ She waved her arms in the direction of the exit.
‘But, Sister—’ began John.
Teddy did not wait to see the outcome of John’s war of words with the sister and left.
He went back the next day but the same sister was there and he was not allowed in. He was down in the dumps, not knowing what was happening to Jeannie but too scared to ask. It was Kitty who told him that she had had an operation.
He collapsed on the sofa, pale and shivering. ‘They haven’t taken her leg off, have they?’ he stuttered.
‘Of course not!’ Kitty sat beside him and covered his hand with hers. ‘Calm down, son. The X-ray found what was causing the infection trapped between two bones in her leg.’
‘What was it?’
‘A scrap of fabric. Wasn’t she wearing leggings?’
Teddy nodded, imagining the foot rest going into Jeannie’s calf and his fingernails dug into the palms of his hands. ‘They removed it?’ he said.
Kitty nodded. ‘She’ll get better now, you’ll see. Everything’s going to be all right.’
Teddy made no answer, convinced his mother was being over-optimistic.
A week later Jeannie came out of hospital, leaning heavily on a stick. When Teddy saw her his instinct was to rush over and carry her anywhere she wanted to go but John was there watching over her like a bulldog and would not let him get near. She looked tired and her face was drawn with pain.
I’ve done this to her
, thought Teddy, and his heart felt as if it was being squeezed in a nutcracker.
How can she go on loving me?
Perhaps she no longer did because she had not looked his way once. If that was so, he wasn’t going to be able to go on living here anymore, so close to her yet so far away.
Over the next few days Teddy toyed with the idea of leaving home. He saw little of Jeannie and when he did the big fella always seemed to be hanging around, making it impossible for them to have a conversation.
It was the advertisement in the enlisting office in Lime Street that finally decided Teddy and, not giving himself time to have second thoughts, he went in and signed on the dotted line.
When the day came for him to leave he went out at his normal time as if he was going to work, but it took all his willpower not to keep glancing over his shoulder as he wheeled his motorbike out of the yard for the last time.
It was Mick who found the note when he came home from work. It was tucked under the box containing Teddy’s fishing reel on the chest of drawers by their bed. He read it with mixed feelings before going downstairs. Jeannie was sitting behind the reception desk reading a book. She looked up and gave him a faint smile. For a moment he hesitated, considering showing it to her but then he changed his mind.