A Pack Family (3 page)

Chapter 3

Decker called Jake after arriving back to Pack house to let him in. He didn’t want to wake Tara or the kids if they were sleeping. He’d bought diapers, wipes, lanolin and some tea that the lady at the drugstore recommended for breastfeeding mothers. He also bought a small container of formula. He was surprised her babies were getting enough milk from the breast.

Jake
met Decker at the door and informed him that Tara had retired to her room with the twins shortly after he left. “Can you show me to their room?”

Jake
raised a brow. “Is there something I should know?”

“
If you need to know, I saw her today she looked beyond tired and malnourished. I thought you said she was being taken care of.” Decker could hear the anger in his voice but couldn’t hide it, didn’t want to.

Jake
narrowed his eyes at Decker. “Are you implying that I’m not taking care of someone under my protection?”

Decker stepped forward.
“Yes, have you seen Tara lately? She won’t be able to care for her babies if she’s not taking care of herself. She needs help and if you cannot, or will not, I will. Without question, I’ll be here if she needs me.” Why did he sound so protective and possessive? “That’s what friends do.” He added for clarification.

Jake
sighed, running a hand down his weary face. “Sorry man, you’re right. I’ve been dealing more with her protection than helping with her pups. Shana has been tired and nauseated or she would have helped more. I’m glad you’re here to help.”

“
What do you mean her protection? Why does she need protection?” Decker’s cop persona began to take over.

Jake
looked startled for a minute. “That’s her story to tell, when she is ready. I won’t break her confidence. As her Alpha I took an oath to protect her. In reality, I’m glad you’re here because it is tiring.”

Decker was perplexed.
Why would Tara need protection? Was she in trouble? He began to panic. “Take me to her.” It wasn’t a question but because he was dealing with an Alpha he reluctantly added. “Please.”

Jake
turned and led Decker down the hall and paused in front of a room halfway down a long hall. “This is Tara’s room. If you’d like, you can stay in any of the rooms down this hall to assist her.”

“
Thank you for letting me stay for a while. I really appreciate it.”

“
Anytime, you’re like pack to us, family. You’re welcome anytime.” Jake reached out to shake Decker’s hand.

Decker took his hand in a firm grip.
“Ditto.”

*****

Decker hoped Tara wasn’t going to get upset with him for simply walking into her room. He didn’t want to knock and risk waking her.

The room was lit by the sun setting outside and the lights were turned off in her room.
It smelled sweet in here. Like baby powder and Tara’s unique scent, peppermint. He looked around finding Tara in the rocking chair in the corner, feeding her babies. She had a pillow under each baby’s body and held their heads to her breast.

His jaw dropped and time stood still.
He had never seen something so profound. He wanted to be a part of this, a family. He wanted to see his wife feed their children while he rubbed her hair and whispered sweet words in her ear. He shook himself out of his momentary insanity.

“
Is it okay if I come closer? I’ve brought the stuff you needed.” He held up the bag and realized he must have looked stupid.

“
Sure, I’m not really shy while feeding them.” He noticed her blush and thought she looked adorable.

He slowly approached the rocking chair and saw crowns of dark hair.
He couldn’t resist running his finger over their silky short curls. “They really are amazing.” He bent down and placed a kiss to the tops of their heads. He didn’t notice how close he was to Tara’s breast until he heard a popping sound and looked down. A sweet baby girl with grey eyes was looking back at him. She appeared very alert as she watched him.

The baby began to root against
Tara’s breast obviously not done with her feeding. Tara was holding her small head and tried to direct her back to the breast but the girl began to cry without immediate gratification. He could tell both mother and daughter were getting frustrated. “Can I help?”

She looked up at him giving a slight nod and directing him to reach down and squeeze her nipple at the same time
Tara directed the girls head to her breast. Success. Decker smiled warmly at her thanks.

Decker smiled back at her he got lost in her eyes.
He caught himself staring and, not wanting to make Tara feel uncomfortable, he took a step back. “I got a few extra things at the store. The lady working in the baby aisle said this tea would help you to produce more breast milk.” He reached back into the bag, “I hope you don’t mind but I got a bit of formula just in case you wanted it as backup.”

She nodded her approval as he began to take diapers, wipes and a small tube of cream from the bag.
“I got everything else you needed. I’ll stick around and burp them when you’re done.”

“
You’re amazing to be helping us so much. I can’t tell you how much it means.” She looked close to tears again.

“
I think little Mister has fallen asleep. I’ll burp and change him if it’s okay? I like babies. I grew up with a lot of cousins and I helped quite a bit.” He gave a tentative smile.

Tara
looked grimly up at him. “Uh, I can’t un-latch him because I’m using both my hands. Do you think you could, uh, help?”

He stepped closer.
“Just tell me what to do, I’m game.”

She directed him.
“You just have to stick a finger alongside the edge of his mouth and break the suction. I think that’s why I’m so sore; I end up just pulling them off.”

He reached over and stuck his finger alongside the edge of her son’s mouth and broke the suction.
The only problem was his finger was tingling from where it came into contact with her breast. He could feel himself getting aroused and felt like a slime ball. He quickly took her son and turned around, walking to the bed to sit. It hardly helped his libido because as soon as he sat he was immersed in her peppermint scent. It surrounded him.

Decker bolted upright.
“I think I’ll take him for a walk while we burp, if that’s okay with you?”

Tara
tried to hide her smile by looking down. “That’s fine, thanks for the help.”

“
Is there a bassinet around here somewhere? I’d like to keep them while you rest a while, at least until their next feeding.”

“
There is one in the room right next to this one. Shana would watch them when she was feeling up to it.”

“
Cool, I’ll be back when I’m done with little Mister to get little Miss. By the way, what are their names?” Decker felt a sudden burst of shame that he didn’t know the twin’s names.

She looked solemn.
“Meet Abby, and your holding Brady.” Why did she look insecure?

He waited until they made eye contact.
“Beautiful names for good looking kids.”

At his approval she smiled.
“Thank you for saying so.” Tara yawned.

“
Hold tight and I’ll be right back for little Abby.” He liked the way she looked at him; like a knight. His thoughts were anything but noble. He hoped she didn’t notice the bulge in the front of his jeans. Darn, he forgot to ask her why she needed Jake’s protection. Oh well, it could wait until after her nap.

He’d changed
Brady and was walking down the hall patting him on his back when Trevor walked up. “Hey Trevor, How’s it going? I’ve missed you buddy, how’s school?”

Trevor
smiled up at Decker. “I like school it’s fun. ‘Cept Suzie keeps hitting me, but dad says that’s because she likes me.” He made a gagging sound. “Barf, I don’t like her. She has cooties and one time, I saw her picking her nose.”

Decker laughed as
Brady burped, spiting up all over the back of Decker’s white button down shirt. Trevor laughed. Did that count as a burp? Decker decided it did count. “Have you held Brady?”

Trevor
shook his head. “Nope, but I gonna real soon. It’s awful nice to be a daddy to the babies. Like Jakie is my daddy now.”

Decker stilled in his pacing.
Is that what everyone thought? Is that what he wanted? Uh oh, Trevor just opened a can of worms. “I’m just helping Tara out.”

Trevor
smiled. “I know. She gonna be real happy when she claims you.”

“
What are you talking about kid? I just want to change some diapers, burp them and put them down for a nap. Help Tara.” That did seem like a lot, was he invading her space or intruding?

Trevor
looked nervous now. “Okay, whatsoever. Don’t tell mom I says anything, okay?”

“
You didn’t really say anything, did you? I have to admit, I’m confused.” 

“
It’s okay, Auntie Tara is a nice lady. I like her and the babies. See ya around.” Trevor walked away smiling and waving.

Okay, that was disturbing.
Decker went into the room next to Tara’s. He had planned on claiming it as his while he stayed here. He placed a sleeping little Brady in the bassinet.

Decker went back into
Tara’s room to get Abby. He found them cuddled in the rocking chair together. Mother and daughter were obviously tired from their big meals. He slid a finger down Tara’s cheek and she turned her face towards him, sighing. He picked up Abby and laid her in her crib for a moment. He returned to the chair, picked Tara up, and placed her in her bed.

Tara
felt good in his arms, better than good, amazing and right. He was certainly becoming attached to her. He’d thought of her often after he helped deliver her babies. He wanted to get to know her, keep in contact, but was uncertain of how to talk to her. She made him crazy by trying to refuse his help earlier, and neglecting to take care of herself. He was stunned to realize he wanted to care for her, and her twins.

He picked up little Abby and went into his room to change and burp her.
This time he didn’t get puked on, thank heavens. When he laid Abby next to her brother they rolled towards each other. He was startled to feel how protective he was of them, and their mother.

Chapter 4

A short two hours later little Abby began to fuss. He picked her up and began to walk her around the room. A couple minutes later she was in a full blown hissy fit. He tried to calm her by patting her back but it wasn’t working so he began to sing to her. She calmed immediately. He sang several Toby Keith songs but forgot some words so he switched to the itsy bitsy spider. Abby loved the song. He sat in a rocking chair with her lying on his upper legs, head at his knees, as he made all the hand gestures that went with the song.

Tara
heard her baby cry and was unable to stop herself from checking them. She walked into the room next door and found Decker singing to an obviously enchanted Abby. Tara was pretty enchanted herself. Decker was young and deserved to live his life, not be strapped down by her and her kids.

Decker felt a prickle of awareness.
Turning he found Tara watching him. He immediately stopped his singing and went to her. “Why the frown? Did you get any sleep?”

She pasted on a fake smile.
“I slept. Thanks for watching thing one and thing two. Were they good?”

“
They slept like angels until a few moments ago. I think she must be hungry again. Has your doctor talked to you about supplementing with formula? My cousin had twins and eventually couldn’t keep up. She gave a couple of ounces of formula a day.”

She looked taken aback.
“No, I’ve been talking to the midwife and she thinks we’ll be fine.” She couldn’t help the anger in her voice. Who was this man to come into her life, leave, and then act like he knew best?”

“
I don’t mean to upset you Tara. I told you, I only want to help. Put your hackles down and just listen. You don’t have to take my advice but I once read that you can breast feed and supplement a formula bottle in the afternoon and at night. I have the article if you’d like to read it. I did the research because my cousin was too tired and she needed help.” He couldn’t believe he was admitting to not only buying the magazine, but to reading it.

She wanted to be nice, but she had to keep her distance.
“I’ll think about it. Bring me the article and I’ll go over it. I’ll do what’s best for Abby and Brady.” She gently took Abby from his arms and went to the bassinet to collect a sleeping Brady.

Tara
had dismissed him again. He kept trying to help her and she literally ran from the room. Did he stink? Was he so unappealing? Maybe she just didn’t want to be in the same room as him because she realized her family was missing a daddy. Whatever it was, he planned on finding out.

Decker marched into
Tara’s room without knocking and found her struggling to get the babies to feed. With tears in her eyes she looked up at him. “I don’t know why they won’t eat. I know they’re hungry.”

Decker softened but swore to himself he’d talk to her soon.
“I’ll help.” He approached slowly and assisted her with getting the pups to latch and then lingered to place a kiss to her temple.
What the hell am I doing?
When they were both feeding he questioned, “What am I doing wrong?”

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
How to answer?
“I’m sorry, Decker. I really want to accept your help but I’m afraid I’ll get attached to you. Or the pups will, and I don’t want them to suffer because their father isn’t like you.” He obviously felt their strong connection.

“
Are you saying you don’t want my help and I shouldn’t be around the twins?” Why did it feel like his heart was breaking? He barely knew Tara, and he certainly didn’t know about her past. Which reminded him, “Why do you need Jake’s protection?”

Tara
’s eyes went wide. “I don’t want your help and neither do my children. Please leave us.” She definitely didn’t need Decker knowing her business. She had a feeling things would only get worse.

“
That didn’t answer my question. I want to know what Jake is protecting you from. Pretty soon I’ll be a part of the police force and I’ll need to know what’s going on. Plus, I thought we were friends.”

Her eyes narrowed and he knew he had just pissed her off.
“Decker, thank you for all you’ve done for me. Somewhere along the line I mistakenly led you to believe I needed help. Let me clear the air, I don’t need your help.”

Now he was getting angry.
“I understand, and I apologize for upsetting you. I’ll keep my distance as you’ve asked.” He bent and kissed the crown of the twin’s heads.

As he walked stiffly out of the room
Tara felt the sudden panic try to engulf her, but she would not be upset. She’d made her bed and now she had to sleep in it.

*****

Decker was in the kitchen preparing a meal for himself. He smiled at the fact he’d made extra for Tara. He found Tupperware and placed the food in it with a note that stated simply, ‘Tara’. He was tired from the drive, the move, caring for the pups and his life in general. He wanted to settle down and find a steady place to work and live. He was ashamed to say that he wanted to do that with Tara. He couldn’t stop thinking about her. Dreaming of how her kiss had brightened his world when he was in a very lonely place.

Decker had assisted in delivering many children into this world so he didn’t think it was that which kept him thinking of
Tara. He didn’t care that she’d already started a family, he loved kids. He’d proven he was reliable and knowledgeable. He was working up to being gloomy when he heard the doorbell.

Decker went to the front door, waiting for someone else to show up and answer it.
No one came and when the bell rang for a third time, he opened the door. “Can I help you?”

Decker felt like he had been punched in the gut.
There on the doorstep was a man who had to be the twin’s father. He didn’t know how, but he knew. The man stood about Five feet ten inches and had black hair and eyes so dark they appeared black. Looking up at Decker the stranger said, “I’ve come to collect Tara.”

Who the hell did this guy think he was?
He was going to collect Tara, my ass.
“She’s unavailable,” was all that came out.

The man smiled and then sniffed the air around Decker.
Damn another Shifter. “I would like to see how the future mother of my children is doing. You must know where she is because you smell of her.”

Wait a minute.
He didn’t even know his children were born. What an asshole. “I’ll see if she’s available to see you.” Decker slammed the door in his face and called Jake on his cell phone.
Freakin’ house was too big to go searching.

“
Hey Jake, someone’s here and he wants to see Tara. He claims he’s the father of the twins.”

Jake
cursed long and loud before saying. “Don’t let him in, and for God’s sake don’t let Tara know he’s here. I’m in the backyard but I’m on my way.”

Decker figured the guy could wait on the porch, it wasn’t that cold.
Why had he shown up anyway? Did he want to take Tara and the twins back? Not happening! They didn’t have to wait long before Jake came in and made a beeline to the front door, not even acknowledging Decker.

Jake
pulled the door open and with outrage he demanded, “Why are you here? I told you to stay off my lands.”

The other man stated coolly.
“Good evening Alpha Calhoun, I’ve come to see Tara, is she close to her time?”

“
You are not welcome on my land, and if you don’t leave I’ll be well within my rights to punish you, according to pack law.” Jake sounded enraged and it made Decker wonder what had happened.

The man bowed.
“I apologize for upsetting you, but I would like to be here when my pups enter the world.”

Jake
’s livid voice carried. “I know that in your pack a rape victim has little to no rights, but in my pack we protect to the death. Do you understand?”

The man winced and bowed his head again while whispering.
“It wasn’t like that and you know it.”

“
Get off my land! If I see you back here I will personally take you before council. Tell your Alpha I will consider it an act of war if you encroach on my land again without express permission.”

“
I understand Alpha and my apologies. Please tell Tara that I have my phone if she wishes to inform me of when her time is near. I await her word. Let her know I’m here if she needs anything.”

“
Don’t hold your breath.” Jake slammed the door in his face.

*****

“What the hell was that?” Decker was clearly enraged. “Did that low life rape Tara? I swear to God this secretive shit has got to stop. Motherfucker! Tell me he didn’t rape her.”

Jake
pinched the bridge of his nose. “There is a tradition that older packs tend to follow. It’s to promote future shifter birth so that our race doesn’t die out. It’s called a moon run. All of the single members of a pack, that are of age, will run under the full moon and wait to be claimed by another member for one night. Not all of the people are willing. Tara was trying to get out of the pack but had been refused several times. In the end, the Alpha forced several women to participate. After the moon run she became pregnant and ran, without looking back. She didn’t want to raise her children in a pack that cared so little about its females. She had heard about my pack which allows for each pack member to find their true mate. I would never force a mating.”

Decker cursed loud.
“How could that have happened? If she didn’t want to participate she shouldn’t have been forced. That asshole-” pointing to the door “-should never have taken her.”

Jake
winced. “To be fair, Dante is a good guy, he didn’t know she was unwilling. His pack Alpha Allen is the one that carries on this tradition.”

“
How is it that he could have gotten her pregnant and assumed she was willing? I’m sure she struggled.” Decker felt bile rise to the back of his throat and he thought he might heave.

Jake
was looking more and more uncomfortable. “Maybe you should talk to Tara about this.”

“
Fuck that! Tara won’t talk to me. I don’t know what her problem is. I feel connected to her in some way but when I try to get close to her she shoves me away. She didn’t even want me to buy the pups diapers, for crying out loud.”

Jake
’s eyes widened. “What do you mean you feel connected? You feel responsible for her?”

Decker didn’t know how to describe it.
“I think about her…a lot. I want to be close to her. Oh God, I know I sound like some kind of freak but I just want…I want to help her, be with her. I want her to come to me for everything. Good Lord, when I was back home I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I bought breastfeeding books, books on twins, and even signed up for parenting magazine.”

Jake
smiled. “Wow, I never would have thought.”
Was Decker her mate?
“Did she say why she doesn’t want to be helped?”

“
What’s going on here Jake? Why all the questions? I don’t understand. Can that guy take Tara back?” He was hit with a burst of anxiety. It felt like a knife to his chest.

Jake’s grin seemed out of place.
“I’ll attempt to keep them away for as long as possible. The only way Tara can leave her old pack is if she finds her true mate, and claims him. A true mate bond supersedes every other bond including the oath she took to her previous Alpha, who she despises. Plus, I know you may not agree, but Dante should have the chance to be with his kids.”

“
But you said some shifters never find their true mate. What are the chances she’ll find hers?” Even thinking about Tara bonding with someone else made him sick. He wanted her happiness though, so he’d just have to suck it up. “I’ll help you protect her while I’m here. It’s clear they don’t know she had the babies”

“
Tara is afraid they’ll try and force her back, or worse take the pups and leave her here. She knows if she goes back she’ll be treated…bad. Maybe even thrown out.” Jake needed to talk to Tara. “Excuse me Decker but I have to talk to Tara and see how she wants to proceed.”

Jake
walked down the hall and Decker found himself following. Jake knocked, and at Tara’s softly spoken, “come in” he entered her room. Jake was startled to hear Decker enter right behind him. Man, Decker had it bad. Jake hoped he was right about Decker being Tara’s mate. But why wouldn’t she claim him?

“
Hey, Tara, how are the pups?” Jake was trying to be cool but he could see the stress on Tara’s face.

“
What’s up, Jake? Decker.”

Ouch, cold.
Tara was being uncharacteristically harsh to poor Decker.

Tara
sat in the rocking chair looking refreshed after her nap and full meal. She was burping the babies like a pro, balancing their weight on her shoulders while patting their backs. Decker was proud of her, but he had no right to be. Which pissed him off.