“What does that have to do with anything?”
“Did you respond to any of the others? Were you tempted to give yourself to them?”
“Of course not!”
“Why is Zach different?”
Susan knew the answer to that question. But there was a time limit on paradise. That’s why she couldn’t succumb to the sweetness offered. “He’s generous.”
“He’s given you more than the agreement?”
“My diamond wedding band, the tennis bracelet, the new car, Paul’s clothes. But afterward I’m going to give everything but the clothes back to him.”
“So his generosity is limited.”
“He’s kind to Paul,” Susan hastily added.
“He didn’t marry Paul.”
“No, but he only married me for Gramp’s sake.”
Megan frowned. “He seems interested in you.”
“He’s a good actor. He pretends he’s in love with me for Gramp’s sake.” He’d done such a good job of pretending, sometimes she forgot he was faking it.
Megan put her arms around her sister. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.”
“Just don’t agree to change schools, giving up your scholarship money. We can’t afford that.” Susan squeezed her tightly before standing and wiping her cheeks. “We’ll be fine. At the end of this, we’re going to be a lot better off, and we’ll find a great place to have.”
“But Rosa and Pedro will be here. Will you be able to find someone else to take care of Paul?”
“Of course. If nothing else, I can leave him with Kate’s nanny. The biggest problem will be his missing Manuel and...and Zach.”
And Paul wouldn’t be the only one.
Zach tried to find some time alone with Susan that evening, but she kept Megan beside her. Or Paul. Or his grandfather. Or even Hester. Anyone but him.
He waited the standard half hour after she’d gone upstairs, but he ran up the stairs like a racer when the half hour was up.
Opening the door to the master bedroom, he stared into the half-lit room at the still form in the big bed.
Moving closer, he whispered, “Susan, are you awake?”
Her body jerked only slightly. If he hadn’t been close, staring intently, he would’ve missed it- “I want to talk to you. I know you aren’t asleep.”
She still didn’t move—unti! he sat down on the edge of the bed. Then she scurried to the other side and glared at him over her shoulder.
“You woke me upl”
“We both know that isn’t true,” he said calmly, offering a smile that didn’t seem to please her.
She gave up the pretense. Sliding to a sitting position against the bed, she tugged the cover breasthigh, leaving her shoulders, covered in a white T-shirt, exposed.
That damn white T-shirt, Zach thought.
“Is that what you always wear to bed?” he asked, forgetting his purpose for the visit.
“Yes, but why do you ask?”
He couldn’t confess how many times that T-shirt had appeared in his dreams, how often he’d wanted to touch it and what was beneath. “Just curious. Most women prefer silk.”
“I’m not most women,” she snapped, and looked away.
“Did you think I was criticizing?” he asked with a laugh. “Honey, I’ve had fantasies about your T-shirt.”
Her eyes widened in alarm and she shrank against the bed.
“Hey, I’ve kept my promise. You’re not frightened, are you?” The thought cut him to the quick.
“No, of course not,” she hurriedly said. “I just... Why did you want to talk to me?”
“I wanted to see if you were all right about Megan being here. And to tell you that I tried to keep Gramp from talking her into changing schools.” She said nothing, so he risked adding, “Though I think it’s a good idea. After all, I’m a KU alum.”
“No.”
She was staring straight ahead, not moving.
“Why?”
She turned to stare at him. “Zach, Megan changing schools won’t affect Gramp’s health. I’ve done everything you asked, but I can’t do this. Leave Megan alone.”
“Okay.” He switched gears. “I need to talk to you about Paul.”
“What’s wrong? Did he do something wrong? Is he hurt? Do I need—”
“Hey, calm down,” Zach said, raising one hand against her frantic questions. “Susan, Paul is family. We’re not going to throw him out even if he does do
something wrong. Gramp and I already love him. And Hester would beat anyone who laid a hand on him.”
She rubbed her hands along her arms and ducked her head, hoping, he suspected, to hide the tears that filled her eyes. “I know,” she whispered. “What—what did you want to say?”
“Paul and Manuel did some chores today, and they did a damn fine job.” He took a deep breath, knowing he was about to cause an eruption. “I paid them.”
“What? You paid them? For doing chores? That’s ridiculous!”
“No, it’s not. On the ranch, everyone is paid for their work. And the boys worked hard.”
“But—I can’t—no! Absolutely not!” She crossed her arms over her chest.
He sighed, his gaze lingering there. “Honey, it’s a learning experience. The boys need practice handling money. I don’t think Paul will be wasteful, but he needs to understand the relationship between sweat and hard work and money.”
She bowed her head and covered her face with her hands. “You’re changing everything, Zach. Everything!”
And he wanted to change even more.
Chapter Eleven
M
egan returned to the University of Nebraska the next morning, driven by Zach’s oldest cowboy, the one he hoped would be least affected by her youthful beauty.
In spite of Susan’s resistance, Zach promised to send someone for Megan whenever she wanted so visit, and assured her he himself would come fetch her for Thanksgiving vacation.
He also gave her money. In a whispered exchange, he explained that he wanted her to have an emergency fund in case something went wrong. And he ordered her to call if she needed anything.
“But Crap already gave me money,” she whispered in return. “Really, I shouldn’t take any.”
He closed his hand around hers. “It’s so we won’t worry. You wouldn’t want Gramp to have a setback, worrying about you, would you?” He was beginning
to feel guilty using his grandfather’s illness the way he was. But the women in his life were so caring, it worked like a charm.
“No, of course not,” Megan said, her eyes widening in alarm.
“Good.”
She reminded him so much of Susan, but she wasn’t Susan. Megan’s sister was special. And the one woman in the world who drove him crazy. Last night, he’d gathered her in his arms to comfort her. But he’d kept his promise. He hadn’t made love to her. He hadn’t even kissed her, because he knew he’d lose control if he did.
And that damned cold shower hadn’t helped much.
After Megan was sent on her way, Paul touched Zach’s arm.
“Yeah, buddy?”
“Do you have any more work for us today?” He ducked his head, then looked up at Zach. “I don’t mean for money. Me and Manuel liked working.”
“Did you talk to your sister?”
Paul smiled even more. “She said I could keep the money as long as I promised to save some of it.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I’m going to save
all
of it. Then when Susan is sad and crying ’cause she can’t pay the bills, I’ll be able to help.”
Zach couldn’t stop himself. He swung the little boy into his arms for a bear hug. “You are one special guy, Paul. But I’ll tell you what. I’ll take care of Susan and her bills. You save your money for your own woman one day.”
“Yuck! I don’t want a girl!”
“Then maybe on Saturday we can go to town and spend part of it. I heard there’s a new Disney movie showing at the theater.”
“Go to a movie? Really? Wow, that’d be neat! And Manuel could come?”
“Of course. Hester might want to go with you, too, and include Josefina.”
“Josie? She’s a girl!”
“Yeah,” Zach agreed with a grin.
Zach got back to the house early that afternoon and hit the shower. While dressing, he thought about taking Susan to town on Saturday while the boys were in the movies and buying her some boots.
After all, she was a rancher’s wife.
That thought put a big grin on his face. He stepped over to her closet, wanting to be sure she didn’t already have a pair.
The two closets in the master suite were huge. A . waste of space in Susan’s case. Zach was shocked to discover the cavernous emptiness. Six hangers were in use, and there were two pairs of shoes.
He frowned as he ran through his memories of Susan’s wardrobe. She had worn that light blue knit several times already, and he’d only known her a week and a half. That navy suit he’d seen a couple of times, too. Her clothes were of good quality, but there weren’t a lot of them.
“What are you doing?” she demanded from behind him.
He spun around. “You’re home earlyl”
“A good thing. I didn’t expect you to paw through my belongings.” Her righteous anger brought bright color to her cheeks.
“I didn’t mean to intrude, honey. I was thinking that you needed cowboy boots, so I wanted to check and see if you already had some.”
She reached past him and shut the door to her closet. “No, I don’t need any.”
“Of course you do. You’re a rancher’s wife,” he said, repeating the justification he’d already used to himself.
He would’ve turned into a Popsicle if her look had the power to transmit its chill.
“No.”
“Susan, I want to teach you to ride. It isn’t safe to ride without the proper equipment.” And he wanted to see her in jeans. That was next on his list.
“I don’t have time to ride.”
Why was she so uptight today? Last night, as she’d cried in his arms, he’d felt closer to her than ever. “Did you have a bad day?”
“No.”
“Something’s the matter,” he protested in frustration. “Last night—”
“I don’t want to talk about last night. I—I was weak. It won’t happen again.”
She turned away, but he couldn’t let her go. Catching her arm, he pulled her back to face him. “Whatever has put a burr under your saddle needs to be
talked out, honey. If you go downstairs angry, everyone is going to be upset.”
“I won’t let it show. After all,” she snapped, “I’ve proved what a good actress I am. Almost as good as you.”
“Okay,” he said in even tones, as if everything were normal. “Then plan on a shopping trip Saturday. You can show me how good an actress you are then.”
“I’m not going shopping with you.”
“You have to have more clothes than what’s in that closet, Susan. You barely have enough for a week. Everyone has more than—”
“But I’m not everyone. I’m Susan Greenwood. You’ll just have to deal with that, Zach, because I’m not going to allow you to buy my soul!” Her voice had risen as she protested until she was almost shouting when she finished.
He didn’t know what was going on. But he knew what to do. Without another word, he wrapped his arms around her and held her against him.
She struggled, protesting.
But he held on, not putting any moves on her, just holding her. Comforting her.
Finally, she realized she wasn’t going to get away. Her body slumped against his and the room grew still.
When her breathing had returned to normal, he whispered, “I know things have changed quickly, honey, but it’s all for a good cause. Gramp is thriving, happier than I’ve ever seen him. You’ve given an old man a lot of happiness in the past few days.”
He stopped, but she said nothing. Her face was
buried against his neck and he inhaled her scent, loving the sweet, spicy perfume she always wore.
“You’ve also made me happy. I didn’t believe a woman like you existed. You’re the best mother I’ve ever seen, honey, and they’re not even your children.”
She pushed against him, and he reluctantly let her out of his embrace. Turning away from him and wiping her hands across her cheeks, Susan mumbled, “Thank you, Zach. But, please, don’t buy me anything else. I can’t...it’s too overwhelming. I feel like I’m losing myself.”
So she was rejecting the only thing he had to give her, since she didn’t want him. Darkness filled him. If he lost her, life wouldn’t be worth living.
She sniffed, and his eyes narrowed. Maybe there was still hope. Maybe she just needed time to adjust. He had until next May. Was he pushing too hard?
Probably. He’d never been known for his patience. After taking a deep breath to restore his optimism, he moved to her side and cupped one wet cheek in his hand. “Okay, sunshine, I won’t force my riches on you. But remember, I’m in your debt, not the other way around. Okay?”
She gave him a wavery smile, nodding slightly, and he had to fight hard to keep from taking her lips with his.
Patience.
That was the ticket.
“You’re being too patient!” Gramp roared.
“Look, Gramp, I know you’re feeling better, but
you’re not supposed to get upset.”
“Lord have mercy, the little girl ignored you at dinner. ”
Zach sighed. “Gramp, she had a hard day. Give her some time. There have been a lot of changes in her life, not of her making, the past few days.”
“Paul’s had a lot of changes, too. He’s okay.”
“Paul’s a little boy. As long as Susan is with him and his tummy is full, he’s not going to complain.”
Pete grinned. “Yeah. He’s a fine boy, isn’t he?”
“The best. Did I tell you what he’s saving his money for?” He repeated his conversation with Paul, knowing it would touch his grandfather’s heart.
“Damn fine boy!”
“Yeah.”
“Heard from Megan since she went back to school?” Pete asked eagerly.
“She just left yesterday,” Zach reminded him drily.
“I think we need to get her a car, a good one, so she can come home whenever she wants. I don’t like her being that far away without transportation.”
Zach smiled. He was beginning to see where he got his impatience from. And he was looking at his grandfather’s suggestions from Susan’s point of view.
“No. We can’t interfere with the way Susan wants to raise her family.”
“Damn it, we’re family, too!”
Zach shook his head. “Not yet. If Susan and I—when Susan and I come to terms with what’s happened,
then we’ll talk about making some changes. But I think we’ll have to let Susan initiate them. We’ve acted like steamrollers, Gramp.”
Pete grumbled. “She unhappy?”
Zach’s throat tightened. “Yeah. It’s all been a little overwhelming for her.”
Pete stared at him, his eyes narrowing in speculation that made Zach uneasy. His grandfather was a master manipulator.
“How long?”
“Gramp, I don’t know. Maybe a month or two.”
“A month? You got to get started on those babies sooner than that!”
For the first time in ages, Zach felt anger toward his grandfather. He’d been a rebellious teen, but in recent years, mindful of his grandfather’s health, he’d seldom crossed the old man.
He stood. “Gramp, whether we have babies or not, Susan’s happiness is important to me. I won’t force her into anything...and you’d better not, either.” He stomped from the room, hoping he had put a stop to the old man’s push for a next generation.
Even if he agreed with him.
Because making babies with Susan was something he dreamed about every night.
Susan was reluctant to leave work.
It had become her refuge.
She went into the serving area of the diner and got herself a cup of coffee. Fortunately, Brenda wasn’t busy, because Susan wasn’t sure she could refill coffee
cups today. It reminded her too much of the day she had met Zach.
“Susan! You’re still here,” Maggie called as she stepped into the diner.
“Yeah. What are you doing here so late?”
“Just wrapping up the end-of-the-month statement. We’re getting better all the time,” Maggie told her with a smile. The profits had been small after all the salaries were paid, but Kate’s expertise was becoming known. The catering business was taking over the diner’s return.
“Great”
Maggie’s eyes narrowed. Then she said, “Mind if I join you in a cup? Do you have time?”
“Yes.” She poured a cup for Maggie and automatically turned to the family booth. She almost asked Maggie if they could sit somewhere else, but she knew she couldn’t. Maggie would know at once something was wrong.
“How are Ginny and James?” she asked as they sat down. Anything to keep from talking about her situation.
“Fine. Ginny is as bossy as ever,” Maggie said with a smile. “I swear she was a drill sergeant in another life.”
Susan chuckled. “I’m sure she’ll outgrow it.”
“Hopefully. How are you?”
“Me?” Susan asked, hoping she sounded cheerful. “Just fine.”
“Are you? You seem a little edgy to me.”
“Oh, I’m worried about the brochure. I finished it and Kate said she’d let me know.”
“Didn’t she call you? She brought it by the house this morning. We both love it. She was so excited, she was taking it to the printer at once.”
“Oh, great I wanted it to be...special. To say thank you for all you two have done for me.”
Maggie gave her a disgusted look. “You are so stubborn! We’re
family.
We do things for one another. I might never have gotten Josh to notice me without your makeover. I still say you could set up a business with that skill and get rich at it.”
Susan gave a genuine smile this time. “Not hardly. I had terrific material to work with. And we both know Josh was already in love with you.”
“And is Zach already in love with you?”
Maggie had slipped that question in when Susan thought she was safe. She lost her breath and her eyes teared. “No! No, he’s not! It’s all a game. I told you.”