A Scandalous Proposal (4 page)

“Ah, gentlemen,” she cooed, turning her head ever so slightly as Timmerly announced them, inwardly cursing the viscount for keeping good his promise to lend his help. She'd really rather he'd taken himself off somewhere, to amuse himself at somebody else's expense. “How good of you to come. Timmerly, refreshments if you please.”

“Yes, Miss Dany,” the butler scolded, bowing. “But if you were to leave off playing with the posies, the countess would be that pleased. It took her ladyship and Mrs. Timmerly a good hour to arrange them this morning.”

The viscount's bark of laughter accompanied the high-nosed butler's exit from the drawing room, leaving Dany with nothing to do but pick up the other blooms and jam them back into the vase. Butlers could be such
prunes
.

“I suppose I'm caught out,” she recovered swiftly, wiping her damp hands against each other as she returned to the couch. “I was hoping to look accomplished, but the truth is, I have very few skills welcomed in polite company. Please, gentlemen, be seated.”

And the maddening viscount was at it again: “Such as picking pockets?”

She turned to the baron, who was looking, or so she hoped, at least slightly amused. Therefore, she would be amused. “Yes, my lords, although I'd rather call it retrieving what's mine. I've now read it cover to cover, of course. How much is truth, sir, and how much could be termed a bag of moonshine? As for the signet ring, the tantalizing clue that just happened to be left behind to be found by your anonymous biographer? I would think both it and the veiled lady were only mentioned to encourage purchase of Volume Two. Do you by chance have a copy in your possession, or know where I might purchase one?”

The handsome, famous Cooper McGinley Townsend, who had been silent until now, his elbow propped on one arm of the chair, his chin in his hand, ignored the question to ask, “Where is the countess? I would have thought she'd had you bound and gagged and locked up in the nursery by now.”

“Oh, ouch,” the viscount said, wincing rather comically. “Did that hurt, Miss Foster? I rather think it didn't, not from the width of that smile. We can safely ignore him, you know. He's been
locked
in an unpleasant mood all day. Not that he's ever particularly jolly, being by nature a calm, sensible, nearly boring man. My friends and I tolerate him because of his good heart, you understand. Plus, he's managed to rescue us from most of our scrapes since our boyhoods with his good common sense. Haven't you, Coop?”

Dany held her smile, but her heart had never been in it, so that her cheeks were beginning to ache. “The trials and tribulations of being a hero must weigh heavily.” She looked almost boldly into those suddenly dark green eyes. She felt he could look straight through her, and it was unnerving, if also faintly delicious. “I feel absolutely terrible, an encroaching beast and any other vile thing you can think of, but I fear I must hold you to your word. My sister truly does need a hero. She's in a terrible pickle.”

Cooper got to his feet. “Yes, of course. I'm afraid the viscount is correct. My behavior, both now and on Bond Street, has been beyond reprehensible and far from anyone's fault save my own ill humor.” He then proceeded to bow from the waist, rather elegantly, and add, “How may I make it up to you, Miss Foster?”

Dany knew herself to be many things, but a lack of backbone (or a mouth) had never been a problem. “A drive in Hyde Park today at five wouldn't come amiss. Appearing with the hero would probably do my reputation no end of good, which should help placate my sister, who believes I'm nearly past saving even now. My lord Nailbourne? Laughing again? You are easily amused, aren't you? Have you ever considered trotting into Society with a monkey on a chain? You could wear matching hats.”

Now, for the first time, Dany heard the baron's laughter, clear and full and wonderfully charming. Even better, he laughed with his entire body—his smile wide, the tanned skin around his eyes crinkling, his shoulders shaking as he showed his pleasure.

“Miss Foster,” he said as he seated himself once more, this time with his legs slightly spread, and resting his elbows on his knees as he leaned toward her, “I would be delighted. But on the contrary, being seen with you will do my reputation no end of good, as I do believe you are going to take the Little Season by storm.”

Now Dany leaned forward, feeling more comfortable with each passing moment. “Now you see, that's just what I said,” she told him earnestly. “Mari isn't quite so sure, and I know my mother is sitting in her private parlor at home even now, making rash promises to our Lord if He will only keep me mute until some poor fool decides he can't live without red-haired children.”

“Miss Foster, you are too candid by half. I think I adore you,” Lord Nailbourne interjected.

“Stifle yourself, Darby,” the baron warned quietly. “Ignore him, Miss Foster. He's much more used to being the one whose every word should be considered a masterpiece of dry humor.”

“Wry humor,” the viscount corrected. “I am an observer, Miss Foster, and do occasionally delight in sharing those observations.”

“I see. And what are your observations of the situation as it stands at this time, my lord? With the three of us here, that is.”

Darby looked at his friend for a long moment, and then shook his head. “No, not today. I think I'll wait. It might be safer.” He then got to his feet just as Timmerly entered the room with the teapot and some cakes. “I believe I now should recall that I have an appointment with my tailor. Or perhaps with my vintner. In any case, Miss Foster, I'm going to toddle off and leave the two of you to discuss her ladyship's dilemma without me in the way. Coop, you can fill me in later if it turns out my earlier offer of assistance remains necessary.”

“Coward,” Coop murmured as the viscount preceded Timmerly out of the room. Then he turned back to Dany, who was hopefully striking her most innocent pose. One, sadly, she had never quite mastered.

“I know you're young, and at least marginally innocent in the ways of the world, but I feel compelled to ask—did you set out deliberately to roust my good friend from the premises?”

Dany sat back against the cushions, one hand to her bosom. “Me? Do something as horridly underhanded as to all but point out that he wasn't necessary at the moment?” She laid her hands in her lap. “Yes, of course. My sister made me promise not to share her humiliation with the viscount.”

“You could have asked him to leave.”

She rolled her eyes. “Now
that
,
my lord, would have been impolite. Shall I pour?”

“Not for me, thank you, as I won't be lingering much longer. You know what you are, Miss Foster? You're the sister I'm so delighted my mother never birthed.”

Dany had been reaching for the silver teapot, but withdrew her hand, as she'd never played hostess before and she was more than a tad worried her hand might shake, giving away her true feelings now that she was all but alone with the baron (Emmaline's snores were soft, but audible). She would have felt insulted, if not for the smile on the baron's face. “My sister's feelings, at least very nearly so. She has said she'd often wished I were the sister my parents didn't have, or words to that effect. Of course, she says much the same about Dexter, our brother. But she doesn't mean it.”

“Then I suppose I don't, either. In fact, I'm going to convince myself you're no more than a younger sister brimming over with good intentions. Can I safely do that, Miss Foster?”

“Oh, yes, yes. That's exactly what I am. Not that I'm not madder than a hatter that she managed to get herself into such a predicament. Really. It sounds much more like something
I
would have done—at least our mother would say so. Except that I know I'm possibly outrageous at times, even a sad trial, but I'm not a complete looby.”

“My friend Oliver married a looby? You must understand that, as much as I wish to be of assistance to his wife, I refuse to do anything that would harm him.”

“Your friend Oliver married a smile as sweet as sugar, a pair of soulful blue eyes and a slim soft body he was attracted to as bees are to honey, and then found himself bracketed to a romantic ninny who believes she should continue to be courted day in and day out for the rest of their lives. I've told her, that sort of thing...wears off after a few years, and you become
comfortable
with each other, as our parents have done. But she doesn't believe that. Mari...well, Mari needs
attention
. And...and
drama
.”

“Which the earl is no longer supplying? You're putting me to the blush, Miss Foster.”

Dany shrugged her slim shoulders. This
explaining
business was more difficult than she had imagined. “As I'm not privy to their private lives, I cannot answer that, and you, my lord, should never have asked the question. I can only tell you that he forgot her birthday before heading north with his chums to hook salmon or shoot winged things, which apparently can only be considered a declaration of his disenchantment with his wife.”

Coop scratched at a spot just behind his left ear. “I should probably add this to the list I've been keeping on the perils of matrimony.”

“You keep a list? Do you have another on the benefits of the wedded state?”

“No, but if I ever think of anything I'll be sure to write it down. Miss Foster, can we please get to the point? Your sister revenged herself on Oliver, didn't she? What did she do? And please don't tell me she took a lover, because I don't have the faintest idea how to rescue her from anything like that, unless you expect me to kill somebody for her. Which I won't.”

“Ah, such a sad disappointment you are, my lord. So it would be asking too much to have you insult the man's ancestors or some such thing, then demand pistols at dawn? As a hero, I'll assume you're a fairly good shot, so it wouldn't present too much of a problem for you.”

“And then I'd escape to the continent for the remainder of my days because duels are outlawed and I'd be hanged if I stayed?”

“Yes, I suppose that is too much to ask. What
are
you prepared to do?”

“Since I don't know the precise nature of the problem, nothing. Again, I remind you, Oliver is a friend.”

“I was avoiding the details,” Dany told him, feeling fairly certain telling him the truth—that she was thoroughly enjoying their nonsense exchanges—would only encourage more, and she was having enough difficulty not melting each time she looked in his amused green eyes.

“Avoid them no longer, Miss Foster. Has the countess taken a lover she now wishes would disappear, preferably without a trace?”

Dany shook her head. “Nearly as bad, but not so dire as to contemplate a
permanent
solution meted out on the man. She began a correspondence with—and I say this with as much disgust as the words engender—a
secret admirer
.”

Now it seemed to be the baron's turn to shrug his shoulders. “Is that all? I agree with you. If we were to line up the married ladies of the ton who have exchanged silly correspondence with supposed secret admirers, they'd probably stretch from Land's End to John O'Groats. Twice. Simply tell the countess to stop fretting. I'm certain Oliver will understand, although why she'd tell him I have no idea.”

“If only it were that easy, my lord, we would not be having this conversation. My sister penned her innermost thoughts to the man, her complaints and misgivings about the beastly, horridly unromantic, probably philandering Oliver, who of course broke her heart into tiny pieces before going off with his male friends to do Lord only knows what. She bared her heart, my lord, her overwrought, melodramatic soul. And everything you can think of she should never have written.”

The baron slightly adjusted his posture. His lean cheeks colored slightly, which was so adorable, especially in a hero. “Hmm. Would this confession expand to include, um, matters of...of marital intimacy? Please say no,” he added quickly.

Even Dany knew she also should be blushing at this point. But perhaps because this all was rather old news to her, or in the light of her never experiencing “marital intimacy” and therefore not approaching the subject with the amount of gravitas she otherwise might, she answered in her usual amused way. “Or the sad lack thereof, my lord?”

“Not good, not good,” he said nearly under his breath.

“Why?”

“Why?” He looked at her directly now. “Because no man would ever wish his manhood questioned, that's
why
. Who's this secret admirer?”

Dany busied herself with a lemon square, shoving a bite in her mouth and mumbling around it, hoping not to be heard, but knowing she had to tell him the truth. “And therein, my lord, lies the rub. She's never so much as met the man, or if she did, she didn't know he and her admirer are one and the same. It's beyond silly, actually, although she's convinced Oliver won't see the humor I see in the thing. To put it briefly, my lord—we don't know.”

“She—
she doesn't know?
For the love of heaven, Miss Foster, how could she not know the name of her secret admir— No, don't answer that. Because then he wouldn't be
secret
, would he? Women, you're all to let in the attic, aren't you?”

Dany felt it necessary to defend her gender, and perhaps even her sister in particular. “Now I may call
you
out. Women, by and large, are ten times more sensible than men. We wouldn't have stupid wars, for one thing. Even my sister isn't usually so empty-headed, if that's what ‘to let in the attic' means. She's simply
emotional
at the moment. My God! I wonder if Mrs. Yothers was right, and she is— No, she'd know that, wouldn't she? She'd have to know that, for pity's sake.”