Authors: Eboni Snoe
nothing
else as she cradled Na’im’s face in her hands. Her entire being screamed for more.
“You’re not the only one who knows how to tease, aros al bher,'' he spoke against her lips as he encircled her in his arms.
Closing her eyes, Felicia didn’t care what happened next. All she knew was she wanted to be close to him, and she swayed with anticipation.
Na’im had also been waiting for just the right moment. As he felt Felicia’s body begin to give in to his, he yanked the two blankets from around her, sending her into a half spin. She would have landed on the ground, if he had not caught her.
“Like I said, there will be only one pallet in this tent tonight” Na’im turned his back and started toward the pallet he’d prepared.
“Why you dirty, conniving….” All of Felicia’s frustra
tions surfaced, as she launched an animal-like attack on Na’im’s expansive back. She took out on him all the anger, hurt and fear that had been mounting inside. She kicked him and gouged her fingernails into his skin, drawing blood in her rage. “You think I’m going to let you get away with this?” She said between tears and clenched teeth.
Na’im had no idea how Felicia would react to his ploy, but he certainly hadn’t expected such fury from one so small. There was simply no way of controlling her until he pinned her on her back, arms and legs outstretched.
“Azizi. Aros al bher, what would you have me do? Take advantage of you at a time when you are the most vulnerable?”
Na’im tried to penetrate her fury that he felt welled forth from wounds much deeper than the one he had inflicted. “I don’t want to do that I have used all the
restraint that I know of in respect of your situation, and you come back here tonight ready to taunt me.”
Felicia looked up into Na’im’s tortured eyes as he reasoned with her beneath him.
“Do you want me to say I want you? That I’d love to be where I'd hate to think any other man has been?”
The emotion and sincerity in Na’im’s reluctant con
fession vanquished the fight within her. Felicia knew she wanted Na’im, but life had taught her to hold back her heart even if her body longed to be taken.
“Don’t you understand? I need you to make love to me. We’ve been through a lot together during the past two days, and more than you can imagine. I’ve wanted you to hold me. I need the comfort of your touch. Ever since this trip started, the reality of my life has been bubbling up within me, not allowing me to forget the past. I want to forget, Na’im. You can make me forget”
“Habibi. Azizi.” Na’im leaned forward blazing a trail of kisses across Felicia’s face.
All kinds of questions flashed through his mind. How could there be so much torture and pain behind eyes so beautiful? The reasoning side of him yearned to know, but his physical need for her was unbearable.
Na’im did not stop kissing Felicia’s face until he reached her mouth, which was waiting for his. This time there was no hesitancy in Felicia’s response as she gave into the sensations he invoked in her. They kissed with fervor and longing, as if through it they could touch the depths of each other’s souls and all questions would be answered.
It was Na’im who reluctantly drew back from Felicia’s clinging lips. “Tonight, aros al bher, everything would feel right to us. We would justify our physical urges and
quench them with little thought. But I fear tomorrow you, more than I, would regret our actions. I cannot afford to think at any time you may look at me with disgust for taking advantage of you.”
Felicia began to shake her head, denying the words that he was saying.
“No, you must listen. Your need for me now is the result of the horrible experience you’ve just been through. I am not saying it is the only reason, but you said it yourself, what you truly need is a friend. I will be that for you now, Felicia. If the rest is in our future, it will happen.”
Silently he rose, offering Felicia his hand. Upon her acceptance, he led her back to the pallet he’d made, adding one of the blankets Felicia had coveted for herself.
As they lay together with Felicia’s body tucked snugly against Na’im’s back, Felicia was the first to give in to sleep, thereby assuring Na’im he had done the right thing.
It was not easy for him to do the same. His body was still tense with desire. But sleep finally came, his mind, at peace, clearing the way.
Chapter Seven
When Na’im, Felicia and Yusef (Yoosef) Shabazz first entered the oasis, they had to cross stretches of irrigated fields where dates and citrus trees were being grown. The contrast between the desert’s dryness and the greenery of the oasis was amazing.
Felicia discovered Na’im had not exaggerated a bit when he said A1 Kharijah was no small settlement. It was quite vast and the closer they got to the inner village, the more colorful it became.
There were carts filled with all kinds of goods, and salesmen peddling their wares, drawing attention to themselves by calling out to passersby or by waving samples in the air.
There were musicians playing flutes in brightly colored galabias and vendors selling street snacks throughout the crowd. All of
people, sounds and smells instinctively made Felicia know how different Egypt would be from America.
Felicia released a sigh of relief as they left the camels drinking at a water hole and preceded down one of the main thoroughfares, where a street sign that read “Ameri
can Consulate” hung from one of the buildings. It was at
this
point that Yusef Shabazz bid them *'As-Salam- Alaikoom."
Felicia was glad. Over the past day and a half, as he rode with them, she had never felt comfortable around him. Na’im never said it, but she knew he felt the same.
The American Consulate building was not that impressive from the outside, but it was comfortable enough once they entered its quiet surroundings. The room was bright with sunlight. It was also quite clean and had several posters of cities of die United States adorning its walls. Felicia found herself wandering from poster to poster. There was a nervous feeling inside of her; something she couldn’t explain, but she knew it had to do with Na’im.
They were greeted by a small Arab who said he was the receptionist ‘ ‘Mr. Johnston, the representative, is not here right now. I do expect him back at any time. Please feel free to wait for him if you like,” he said, pointing to the wooden chairs that lined one of the walls.
‘ ‘Thank you,’ ’ Felicia smiled in acknowledgement, as Na’im motioned for her to follow him back outside.
“I have several things I need to look into while I’m here. I don’t know how long it’s going to take, but here are several piasters for you to buy something to eat in case you get hungry.”
Felicia looked at the coins Na’im held in his outstretched hand. She was reluctant to take them, and it wasn’t just because she didn’t want to take money from him. Common sense told her to take them anyway.
Anxious feelings arose in her as she watched him disappear in a sea of galabias, western-styled clothes and melayas. She decided to get something to eat before she returned to the building.
During their last two days together, Felicia and Na’im had shared his pallet, but that was all. With Yusef Shabazz accompanying them all the way to A1 Kharijah, they had kept up the pretense of man and wife for Felicia’s sake.
Na’im was different after their night of confrontation. He treated her kindly, but he kept her at arms length. Felicia felt her open invitation for him to make love to her was the reason why. Na’im now saw her as a loose woman, unworthy of his affection. Today, there was no doubt in her mind that he had made the right decision in not accepting her offer. She was thankful that he had.
Na’im had made it clear on the second day of their journey that Felicia would have to take on the duties of a nomad’s wife, preparing the food and fetching kindle for the campfires. She had fulfilled her end of the bargain without protest.
It had taken them exactly two days to reach the outskirts of A1 Kharijah, where they camped until sunrise the following day.
Felicia couldn’t fathom how long she had been sitting in the small office waiting for the representative to return. Her head began to ache in a fashion to which she’d become accustomed since the accident.
She threw away the empty sack that had held the street snacks she’d bought not far from the building, while the receptionist offered another apology for the delay. Her nerves were on edge as she studied the yellowing posters of cities in different countries, including the United States.
Constantly, Felicia’s eyes strayed to the bare window that looked out onto the street. Her thoughts were not on the representative, but on Na’im.
The mail clerk was surprised and pleased to see Na’im as he entered the sun baked building. Through the years Na’im’s face had become quite familiar, and of course he had known of Na’im’s visit to the United States through the steady flow of letters written between he and his father.
“As-Salam-Alaikoom, Halil (Ha-leel). It is good to see you.”
“Alaikoom Salam, and you as well, Na’im. You could not have arrived at a better time. I have a letter addressed to you from the sheik that I was about to send out. Evidently your arrival will be a surprise for him.”
“Yes, and that is ho w I have planned it,’ ’ Na’im replied as he opened the sealed envelope and read:
“Naim,
Your mother and I are well. This letter is a request for you to return home as soon as possible. Several changes have taken place in the area and your help would be of great value at this time.
Your father,
Sheik Ahmed Salim Rahman ’ ’
It was not like his father to be evasive, so Na’im knew there was some kind of trouble going on. He had to get to Karib without delay.
Na’im thought of Felicia, and he knew she was at the best place for her, the American Consulate. There she could get the help she needed. Once he got things in order in Karib, he would check back with the consulate and find out exactly where she had gone.
With this resolution in mind, he jotted down a message and asked that it be delivered to Felicia at the consulate.
Felicia’s heart lurched as the phone rang. She had just finished reading the note she’d received from Na’im. The representative’s low-toned, hesitant conversation on the phone gave her the feeling her troubles were just beginning.
‘ ‘Ms. Sanders, I am so sorry. An emergency has come up. Mr. Johnston has been sent to Cairo and will not be back for a couple of days.”
“This is really awful...! don’t have anyone I can contact. I know that sounds a little crazy, but you see, everyone I know are at the research site, miles away from here. They can’t be reached by phone and I only have a little bit of money. I lost everything I had in an accident. I have some money that was given to me by the gentleman who brought me here, but I’m sure it’s not enough to provide for several days’ stay,” Felicia concluded in utter frustration.
“I’m sorry this has happened. I would help you if I could but it is not my job to communicate with the main office in Cairo, and I simply would not know what to do. I will tell you what I will do. I will send a message to my Majidah (Ma-jee-duh) and see if you can stay with our family for a couple of nights. I am sure she will not mind. We run a small motel here in A1 Kharijah. It is not in the inner city, but it is not far. I will check with her; I am sure it will be fine.”
Felicia looked at the small man with the large, dark, kind eyes and decided once again there was nothing she could do but accept his help. ‘ ‘If you really think it will be all right...,” she replied with her heart pounding, so much aware of her vulnerable situation.
‘ ‘Sure, it will be all right My Majidah is a good woman. She will be glad to help a young woman as you. By
the way, my name is Najid Mu’adin (Na-jeed Moo-ah- deen).”
“I am pleased to meet you, Mr. Mu’adin.”
Najid returned to his desk and scribbled a note on a small piece of paper. Stepping outside the building, he walked to one of the nearby peddler’s carts where a Berber was selling many beautiful rolls of cloth. Najid spoke to him in rapid Arabic, and the Berber nodded his head in understanding, taking the paper from him.
“Raoul, Raoul, take this note to the house of Najid Mu’adin,” the Berber called out to the young boy who appeared.
It looked as if the child wanted to put up a protest, but before he could, the Berber inspired him in a somewhat more ominous tone.
“Now! You lazy child! What else have you to do but ask me for money all day so that you can eat everything that is sold in the marketplace,” and he placed his hand menacingly on a braided belt made from camel’s hair.
With this, the young fellow took to his heels, followed closely by a scraggly brown and black dog.
Chapter Eight
Her dark, shoulder-length hair swayed like a flag in the wind, as the small, brown-skinned girl jumped up and down, waving her arms in a welcoming gesture as Felicia and Najid approached the inn.