Read A Voice in the Wind Online
Authors: Francine Rivers
Atretes stood with the torch as the guard came and unbolted the cell door. As he opened it, Hadassah turned and looked up at Atretes, and her eyes shone with warmth. “May the Lord bless you and keep you, the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you. May the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace,” she said with a gentle smile. Turning away, she entered the cell. A soft murmuring of voices greeted her, and the door was closed with a hard
thud
of finality.
37
Hadassah picked her way carefully among the other prisoners and sat again beside the little girl and her mother. Raising her knees, she rested her forehead upon them. She thought of Atretes, a prisoner of bitterness and hatred, and prayed for him. She prayed that Julia would turn away from the path of destruction she had chosen. She thanked God for Decimus, for his entry into God’s kingdom, and she prayed that Phoebe would find her way to the Lord, too. She prayed that God would open a way for Prometheus’ escape. She prayed that God would show mercy upon Primus and Calabah. Through the rest of that night, she prayed.
And, finally, Hadassah allowed herself to think of Marcus. Her heart cried out in pain as hot tears came. “Oh, Lord, you know the desires of my heart. You know what I want for him. I humbly beseech you, Lord, open his eyes. Open his eyes that he might see the truth. Call his name out loud, Lord, and let it be written in the Book of Life.”
The torch sputtered and someone cried out. “I’m afraid,” a woman said, and a man answered, “The Lord has forsaken us.”
“No,” Hadassah said gently. “The Lord has not forsaken us. Never doubt in the darkness what God has given us in the light. The Lord is with us. He is here now. He will never leave us.”
She began to sing softly and others joined in. After a moment, she bowed her head again, using what little time she had left to pray for those she loved. Marcus. Phoebe. And Julia.
When morning came, the door opened and the young guard who had come with Atretes entered.
“Listen to me,” he commanded, staring straight at her. “You will die today. Listen to what I tell you that it may go quickly. Lions that have been starved aren’t necessarily vicious. They’re weak and easily frightened, especially when the crowd starts yelling. You’ll be strange prey to them. Now, do this. Stand quiet. Spread out. Move your hands and bodies slowly so the lions will know you’re alive and no threat to them. If you do this, they’ll charge. The end will come swiftly that way.”
He fell silent for a moment, still looking at Hadassah. “They’re coming for you.”
She rose. “May the Lord bless you for your kindness.”
He turned away. Everyone rose and began to sing praises to the Lord until the cell filled with the sound. Other guards came. They shouted and shoved the prisoners along the darkened corridor and up the narrow stairway and finally to the gates. Hadassah could hear a heavy sound like rolling thunder from outside. Sunlight reflected off the raked sand, blinding her.
Metal screeched against metal as the gates were opened. “Move out into the middle!” the guards shouted again, pushing at them. “Hurry up! Get moving!” A whip cracked, and someone gave a cry of pain and stumbled against Hadassah.
She took hold of the man’s arm and helped him walk to the gate. Then she smiled at him, let him go, and walked out onto the sand. The others followed.
After days of darkness, the sunlight made her gasp. She put her hand up to shield her eyes. Jeers and insults rained down on her and the others. “Call on your god to save you!” someone shouted, and mocking laughter resounded.
“They look too thin to tempt a lion!” another called out, and rotten fruit and vegetables and picked bones were flung down at them. “Send in the lions! Send in the lions!”
Hadassah looked up at the mass of people, drunk on cruelty, screaming for blood,
her
blood. “God have mercy on them,” she whispered, her eyes welling with tears.
At the roar of lions, a familiar coldness coiled in Hadassah’s stomach. Her throat closed and her mouth went dry. Her old enemy closed in on her, but she knew how to fight now. Standing firm, she called upon the Lord.
“Oh, Jesus, be with me now. Stand by me and give me your strength that I might glorify you,” she prayed. The calmness came upon her again, washing away the fear and filling her with joy that she would suffer for the Lord.
More gates were opened and the crowd cheered wildly as a dozen lions were driven into the arena. Terrified by the screaming mob, the beasts hugged the walls, paying no attention to the group of ragged prisoners standing in the middle of the arena.
“Mama, I’m afraid,” a child whimpered.
“Remember the Lord,” her mother answered.
“Yes,” Hadassah said, smiling. “Remember the Lord.” She separated herself from the group, walked calmly toward the center of the arena, and began to sing praises to God.
The mad screaming of the crowd rose. Slaves jabbed dull spears at the beasts who still hugged the rim of the arena, driving them away from the walls. They turned toward the center nervously. One lioness turned toward Hadassah and crouched low, advancing cautiously. Still singing, Hadassah lifted her arms from her sides and spread them slowly. Seeing she was alive and no threat, the beast charged, and the mob screamed wildly. The animal covered the distance with astonishing speed and leapt, claws spread, jaws open.
Julia laughed and tossed grapes at Marcus. “You’re a terrible tease, Marcus,” she said, reclining comfortably as he laughed.
“Would I turn down such a heart-wrenching plea from my beloved little sister?” he said, leaning back comfortably, his foot resting on a small stool. “You sounded desperate for my company.”
“Who else ever made me laugh as you do?” she said and snapped her fingers. “Pay attention, girl,” she said, and her new maid moved the large fan again. Marcus smiled faintly, his gaze flickering briefly over the girl’s lithe body. “A new acquisition?”
“I’m glad to see you’re your old self again,” Julia said, amused. “She’s pretty, isn’t she? Much prettier than Hadassah,” she said, watching him surreptitiously.
Marcus gave a cool laugh and turned his attention to the gladiators as they paraded before the spectators. He didn’t want to think about Hadassah today. He had come to the games to forget. The bloodletting would be a cathartic release for his pent-up frustration. “Capito and Secundus fight today,” he said, aware Julia was watching him. She was pensive and he wondered why.
“So I read. Who will win, do you think?”
“Secundus.”
“Oh, but he’s so boring. He plods around the arena like a tired old bull.”
“His plodding is what keeps him alive,” Marcus said. “He waits for his opportunity and strikes.” The pompa completed, the chariots sped from the arena. The trumpets blared loudly, announcing the beginning of the games. The noise of the crowd rolled and swelled, restless and hungry. Marcus stood.
Julia sat up. “Where are you going?”
“To buy some wine.” He glanced up at the cloudless sky. “It’s getting hot already. The awnings aren’t going to do much good.”
“I have wine, plenty of it, the best quality. Don’t leave. The games are beginning.”
“There’s nothing of interest at the beginning. Just some criminals being fed to the lions. There’s plenty of time before the real blood matches begin.”
Julia reached out. “Sit down, Marcus. We’ve hardly talked at all. Primus can go for whatever we need, can’t you, Primus?”
“Of course, my dear. Whatever your heart desires.”
“Sit here, Marcus,” Julia said, patting the seat closest to her. “Please. It’s been so long since we attended the games together. It was never as much fun as when I attended with you. You’ve always had an eye for what was coming. You always pointed things out to me that escaped my attention.”
Marcus sat down beside her. He felt her tension. “What’s wrong, Julia?”
“Nothing’s wrong, except that I want things to be the way they used to be between us. I want to go back to the way things were in Rome, before I married Claudius, before anyone came between us. Do you remember the first time you brought me to the games, Marcus? I was so excited. I was such a child. You laughed at me because I was squeamish.” She smiled at the memory.
“You got over it quickly enough,” he said with a rueful grin.
“Yes, and you were proud of me. You said I was a true Roman. Do you remember?”
“I remember.”
“Things will be the way they were, Marcus. I promise you. After today, we’ll forget everything that’s happened between then and now. We’ll forget everyone who’s hurt us.”
Frowning slightly, Marcus touched her cheek. He thought of Caius and Atretes. She never spoke of either, but he knew both had left scars, deep scars that she kept hidden even from him.
“Do you love me, Marcus?” she asked, her eyes intent.
“Of course, I love you.”
But not the way he once had, she knew. His expression became guarded, pained. All that would change soon. Today would wipe away the past and avenge his wounds—and hers. “You were always the one person I could count on, Marcus,” she said and took his hand. “You were the one person I knew would always love me no matter what I did. And then others got in the way and made things change. We let them get in the way. We shouldn’t have done that.“
“I never stopped loving you, Julia.”
“Perhaps you didn’t stop, but things changed between us. People made them change. I’d see the way you looked at me sometimes, as though you didn’t know me anymore. But you do know me, Marcus. You know me as well as you know yourself. We’re so much alike, peas from the same pod. Only you’ve forgotten.”
Her hand was cold and strong. “What’s wrong, Julia?” he asked again, concerned.
“Nothing’s wrong,” she said. “Everything is right. Or will be. I’ve made sure.”
“Of what?”
“I have a surprise for you, Marcus.”
“What surprise?”
She laughed. “Oh, no. I’m not going to tell you. You’ll just have to wait and see. Won’t he, Calabah?”
Calabah smiled faintly, her eyes cold and black. “The games have begun, Julia.”
“Oh, yes,” she said eagerly, her hand tightening on his even more. “Oh, yes, they have. Let’s watch, Marcus. You’ll see what I’ve done for you.”
A chill of premonition swept through him. “What have you done?” he asked, willing his voice to be calm and steady.
“Look!” she said, extending her right arm, pointing. “The gates are opening. Do you see them? Foul stinking wretches. They deserve death. Everyone of them. Look! Do you see?
Christians
!”
Heart pounding, Marcus saw the prisoners stumble out into the sunlight.
Oh, gods…
Even at this distance, he recognized Hadassah. His heart stopped. “No!” he said, his voice a hoarse whisper, trying to deny what his eyes could see.
“Yes! Hadassah,” Julia said and saw how white his face was. “She’s getting what she deserves.”
He stared as Hadassah led the group out, walking calmly. “What have you done, Julia?”
“I heard what she said to you! I heard her throw your love back in your face. She preferred her god over you, and you said her god could have her. Well, now he shall.”
“You arranged this?” His voice was filled with desperation and loathing. He tore his hand from her, wanting to strike her. “You did this to her?”
“She did it to herself. I took her to Vitellius’ feast.”
“You know Vitellius hates Jews!”
“Yes, he hates them, and with good reason. They’re the most miserable race on the face of the earth! Full of pride. Guilty of rebellion from the womb. She wouldn’t recant. I knew she wouldn’t. I knew it! She just stood there, looking at me with those pathetic, soulful eyes, as though she pitied
me
.”
“She saved your life once! Or have you forgotten Caius almost killed you? And yet you sent her to her death?”
“She’s a slave, Marcus. When she protected me, she only did what she was supposed to do. Should I be grateful for that? Her life means nothing.”
Marcus felt desperation rise within him, making it almost impossible to breathe. “Her life means everything to me!
I love her
!” he cried.
Suddenly the crowd screamed wildly, and Marcus turned to see that the lions had entered the arena. He surged to his feet. “
No
! She’s innocent! She’s done nothing wrong!”
“Nothing?” Julia rose with him, clutching at his arm. “She put her god above you. She put her god above Rome! She’s a foul stench in my nostrils. She’s a thorn in my side, and I want her plucked out, destroyed.
I hate her
! Do you hear me?” She looked back at the arena. “Yes! Drive the lions from the wall!”
“No!” He shook Julia off. “Go back, Hadassah! Go back!”
“Drive the lions out!” Julia screamed again, more wildly.
“
No
!” Marcus tore his sister’s hands from him. “Go back, Hadassah!”
The sound of the screaming mob rose as Hadassah walked calmly toward the center of the arena. The lioness crouched. Hadassah lifted her hands slowly, spreading her arms as though to welcome the beast as it charged.
“
No
!” Marcus cried out again, his face convulsing as the lion hit her. He turned his face away as she went down—and something inside of him died.
“There,” Julia said triumphantly. “It’s finished.”
The sound of ecstatic pleasure rose as spectators cheered wildly. More lions roared. Screams of fear and pain rang out, and someone laughed near Marcus. “Look at them scatter now!”
Another hooted. “Look at those lions fighting over the carcass of that first girl!”
And in that instant, God answered Hadassah’s prayer.
Marcus looked back, and his eyes were suddenly opened as he stared down at Hadassah, lying crumpled on the sand, her tunic shredded and bloodstained. Two lionesses were fighting over her body, ripping at one another. One bit into Hadassah’s leg and tried to drag her away. The other attacked again.
“I paid her back for what she did to us,” Julia said, clutching at Marcus. “We can forget her now.”