I slipped into my seat in his classroom as the last period bell rang.
“Close call,” the girl sitting next to me whispered.
I shot her a quick smile. Gabrielle Stone was the only thing about American government that could remotely be called fun. She was the most stared-at student in our school, and not just because she’d started here her senior year. Gabrielle was a celebrity—an international movie star, living in Raleigh while she finished high school like an ordinary teen.
Not that Neuse Academy—the area’s most expensive private school—had all that many
ordinary
teens.
Gabrielle had been given a lot of freedoms the rest of us hadn’t, like right now, when she had her tablet out to “take notes.” I was probably the most aware of this privilege since, in addition to sitting beside her in government, I was also her lab partner in physics.
After school let out, I headed for the bike rack. As I was clipping on my helmet, Gabrielle strolled up, along with two of our physics classmates. An older guy, wearing aviator shades and an earpiece, followed a few paces behind them. He stopped when they stopped.
I looked from him to Gabrielle.
She smiled. “That’s Garrett. He’s my bodyguard.”
Interesting. I’d never seen him inside the school, which was oddly comforting. We must be pretty secure if she didn’t need him during the day.
She inclined her head toward the pair with her. “Do you know Jesse and Benita?”
“Hey, Jesse.” Of course I knew him. He would likely be the valedictorian this year.
Benita shook my hand with a strong grip and a big smile. We’d never been introduced before, but I definitely knew who she was. It was hard not to notice her. She walked around our preppy campus in hippie clothes, hauling a cello case, her hands covered by gloves with cut-off fingertips.
Jesse locked his arm around her waist. “Benita’s a sophomore.”
Message received. They were an actual couple. I didn’t bother to tell him I was already taken too. “A sophomore who takes physics?”
“I like science.” She smiled down at her boyfriend, who was a head shorter. “And I wanted to take a class with Jesse.”
Gabrielle laid a hand on my arm. “We’re heading to Olde Tyme Grill to study. Want to come? We could share our notes from what you missed in class yesterday.”
“Sorry. Not today.”
“How about next week?”
“Maybe.” I wasn’t sure if I ever would, but there was no point in blowing them off completely.
“Good. We’ll tell you after we decide for sure when we’re going.” Her gaze flicked to the parking lot and back again. “Do you ride your bike every day?”
“As long as the weather’s good.”
“So you live close by?”
“Yeah. Only six miles. Near Umstead Park.”
She laughed. “
Only
six miles?” A black Mercedes SUV pulled to the curb and idled. “Here’s my driver. If you ever want to join us, we can give you a ride.”
“Thanks.” Not going to happen anytime soon. Between needing to be with Susanna, mowing lawns for my lawn service, and wanting to squeeze in a training ride before sundown, I didn’t have much time to hang out.
C
HAPTER
F
IVE
S
PEAKING
S
HARPLY
Norah drove to a large shopping center called Cameron Village. Charlie told me not to worry that it only had stores. “It also has the best library in the county,” he said.
When we walked through the entrance to the library, I knew that he must be right. It was like a two-story mansion full of couches and books. Thousands of books. I was speechless with wonder.
Charlie patted me on the shoulder. “I’ll be browsing in the mystery section. Where will you go?”
Swallowing hard, I whispered, “History.”
He chuckled. “When will you ever tire of reading about history?”
“When I have caught up,” I said without thinking.
“What?”
I hurried to give him a reasonable explanation. “There will be history on my high school equivalency examination. I must study what I have missed.”
He cocked his head. “Didn’t you take history classes in that commune?”
“Girls did not receive the same education as boys.” That, at least, was quite true.
“Did you ever hear news from the outside?”
“Very little.” Perhaps I should leave before he pressed the issue. I could make up no suitable response besides the truth, and he would not believe that. “I shall see you later.”
I followed the signs to the history books, pausing with delight as I found shelf after shelf of true stories from the past.
It was the summer of 1796 when I escaped. Worthville, my hometown, had yet to be destroyed by a tornado. My sister was living and working in young Raleigh—a city of mud streets and a state government in its infancy. I wanted to know what life had been like for Phoebe after I left her behind.
A title caught my eye.
Architecture in the Nineteenth-Century Carolinas
. I drew the volume from the shelf, rested it on a table, and flipped through its pages with reverence. Many photographs, in shades of white and brown, awaited me. Photo after photo of historical buildings.
One of the pages held several views of a large house in Raleigh. The property had a side garden and two smaller buildings on its rear lawn. Neither the trees nor the grounds looked familiar, but I recognized the main house. My heart pounded faster.
I’d been here before.
The book called it the Avery-Eton House, but I knew it by only one name. Senator Nathaniel Eton, a much-revered member of North Carolina’s first legislature, had built this house for his family. Mrs. Eton had offered my sister a position as a housemaid.
Charlie stopped beside me, a thick book in his hand. “Found something you like?”
“Indeed, I have.” I handed the volume to him. “Do you know where this house is located?”
He read the caption. “Yeah. It’s a couple of blocks away from the Governor’s Mansion.”
“Might we drive by it some time?”
“Sure.” He glanced at his watch. “We could swing by today. Are you ready to go?”
I nodded eagerly and followed him to the place for borrowing the books. He added mine to the top of his stack and handed a small plastic card to the lady at the counter. As she reached for our books, she smiled at me. “Would you like your own library card?”
“Indeed?” My head buzzed with the possibilities. “How might I acquire one?”
“All you need is proof that you live in the county and a photo ID.”
Disappointment stabbed me. “I do not have identification.” I turned to flee, tired of the reminders that I did not belong in my own country yet.
Outside the library’s front doors, a bench sat in the shade. I sank onto it to watch and wait.
The shopping center was quite busy. Cars pulled in and out. Women in tight garments and leather boots walked past, their hands gripping tiny children and phones. It was not long before Norah exited the grocery store at the corner, cloth sacks in each hand.
“Hello.” She plopped onto the bench beside me. “Did you enjoy your visit?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Where’s my husband? Checking out books?”
“Yes, ma’am.” I felt my cheeks warm.
“Susanna, forgive me if this is too bold, but I bought you something.” She reached into one of the sacks and drew out a scrap of cloth. She unfolded it to reveal a shirt with sleeves of a peculiar length.
I brushed my fingers over the fabric. It was wondrously soft and in a pretty shade of crimson.
She laid it in my lap. “Red would be gorgeous with your coloring.”
“Norah,” I said with great reluctance, “you’ve given me too much already. I cannot accept another gift.”
“It’s not a gift. I’ll make you work it off.”
Interest curled in my belly. “We shall barter?”
“Yes. Based on what I paid for it, I think three hours of chores are fair.”
“Three hours?” It didn’t seem like much. Was I an object of pity to her too?
“Three hours of my
least
favorite chores, like weeding the garden and shoveling ashes from the fireplace.”
I smiled. They were not favorites of mine either. It delighted me to receive them. “It’s a deal.”
She patted my knee. “Here comes Charlie.”
“All right, ladies,” he boomed, “I’m ready to go.”
He strode to their vehicle. As he was helping his wife into the driver’s seat, he said, “We need to run downtown by the Governor’s Mansion for Susanna. I’ll give you exact directions when we’re closer.”
I crawled into the back seat and buckled up. It took hardly any time to reach the government area and then the Avery-Eton House.
“Here we are.” He whistled. “Holy moly. Somebody has done some major renovations on this place.”
The house gleamed with burnished brick and new paint. It was nestled in a manicured garden, bordered by a low white fence, and framed by large oaks. The Etons’ home was as elegant as I remembered. Age had merely made it more lovely.
Norah pulled to the curb. “If you want to go in, it looks open.”
I did want to go in, but not without Mark. “I shall wait.”
Charlie pointed at a large banner hanging in the yard. “They’re about to have their grand opening celebration. Try to get down here Saturday.”
* * *
Norah and Charlie retired at nine. Too restless to sleep, I rocked on the deck in the warm air, listening to the night creatures come alive to their work.
The phone rang with Mark’s signal.
“Hello,” I said, happy that he’d called.
“Hey.” A neutral word said in a neutral tone. “How was your day?”
“Most enjoyable. I have a new book from the library.” He made no response, his silence heavy. I wouldn’t permit him to spoil my lovely day. “Are you working on homework?”
“Just finished. Why are you at the lake house?”
“Your grandparents invited me.” I understood the usefulness of a phone, but not seeing his face made it more difficult to gauge his mood. “They drove me to the Eton house. It still stands, and I should like to see it more closely. Will you take me?”
“When?”
“Perhaps Saturday?”
“Yeah, I can do that.” He cleared his throat. “Did Mom chase you away?”
“She would not do such a thing.”
He mumbled an expletive. “Susanna, don’t let her get to you.”
“It is your mother’s household. I must honor her wishes.” At least, I would try to honor them. I didn’t always understand what she wanted, and she seemed reluctant to tell me.
“I didn’t like coming home without you here. I miss you, Susanna.”
His words left me feeling warm and deliciously light-headed. “I miss you too. Will you pick me up tomorrow? I could make supper for you.” Already my mind sorted through the options. It was grand to plan a menu without worrying about its colors. Mrs. Lewis insisted that we fill our plates with food of green, red, and yellow. I much preferred white: fried chicken, cornbread, mashed potatoes. And butter.
“I love it when you cook. Susanna?”
“Yes?”
“I love you.”
My cheeks heated. “Indeed.” I could say those words too, but he said them much more often and much more readily. Was it a unique part of Mark or was it common to the young men of his century? I desperately wanted to believe that Mark’s words were especially meant for me, but perhaps it was the way of this world, like exposed skin. Or speaking sharply to one’s elders. “I shall see you tomorrow.”
“You will.”
C
HAPTER
S
IX
O
PPOSITE
OF
S
YMPATHETIC
Benita stopped at the bike rack as I was putting on my safety gear. “Jesse and I are going with Gabrielle to the football game tonight. Want to come?”
My gut reaction was
hell yeah
. I loved football, it was my senior year, and our team had a seriously good chance at the league championship.
But I also wanted to be with Susanna. I would offer to take her with me, except crowds still freaked her out. She would have a horrible time in a dark, noisy stadium watching a sport she didn’t understand. Which was why I’d missed every game they’d played this season.
So there it was. The same battle I’d been fighting for three weeks in a row.
“Mark?”
“Thanks, Benita. Not sure if I can make it.”
“Okay. Let us know if you change your mind, or just show up. We’ll save you a seat.”
Benita was way friendlier than I’d expected from seeing her around campus. It was nice that she hadn’t let my vagueness deter her. “Maybe I’ll see you there.”
“Cool.” She tossed me a smile as she loped away.
I called Susanna the minute I got home. “Hey.”
“Hello. How was your day?”
“Great.” I could hear the smile in her voice. She’d had a good day too. “When will supper be ready?”
She hesitated. “Why do you ask?”
Okay, I was just going to tell her, and I was
not
going to feel guilty—’cause she’d chosen to spend last night away from me. “Some kids from school asked me to hang out with them tonight, but it would mean I’d have to drive to the lake house now, eat, and get us back here by six-thirty.” It would take forty-five minutes on three majorly clogged highways across two counties to reach my grandparents’ house, but I would do it if she wanted me to.
“I think that is too much effort.” Her voice lost its smile. “You should go with your friends.”
“Okay.” It was hard to tell with Susanna whether she was really upset or mildly disappointed. “Why don’t you come with me?”
There was a long pause. “Where will you hang out?”
The way she repeated “hang out” almost made me laugh. She enunciated each consonant so clearly that it gave the expression a foreign sound. “We’re going to a football game.”
It was spooky how completely Susanna could fill silence with emotion, and this time, it wasn’t positive emotion. “Perhaps I should remain at the lake house for another night.”
Of course she would. Why had I even tried? I’d known the answer before I asked the question. “Sure. Whatever.”
“Why does this make you angry?”
I bit off a sigh. “I’m not.”
“You are. I do not know what to say, except that I am not ready.”