Absolute Truths (61 page)

There was a deep, deep silence. When I looked at both men
again I saw that Nigel now appeared almost as perturbed as Malcolm, and I realised I had to back-pedal in order to emphasise my
episcopal stability.

‘
I assure you I’ve prayed a good deal about this,’ I said in my
most businesslike voice. ‘I’ve also talked extensively to Hall, seen
Desmond and tried to approach the scheme with the necessary
hard-headed common sense. When I said: "I feel it’s the will of
God," I wasn’t just making an off-the-cuff remark. I spoke out of
a sincere and earnest conviction that over the past few days God
has made his will very clear to
me.’

‘
Yes, of course, Charles,’ said Nigel. ‘Of course we recognise
your earnestness and your sincerity and of course we wouldn’t
dream of disputing your conviction; if you feel it’s God’s will that there should be a healing centre in the diocese, that’s fine. But it
may just possibly be the case that St Paul’s isn’t the best place for
it – and indeed that Lewis Hall would be less riskily employed in
some job where he wouldn’t be constantly dealing with vulnerable women. Perhaps a chaplaincy in a prison – or in a public school –’

‘
Not in my archdeaconry!’ declared Malcolm with the air of a
m
an prepared to fight to the last ditch. ‘Charles, I feel bound to
say – and you’ll realise that I speak
as
one of your most loyal and
devoted friends –’

‘
Malcolm,’ said Nigel, ‘this may not be quite the moment to
take the matter further.’ But unfortunately Malcolm was too out
raged to listen.

‘
I feel bound to say,’
he repeated, furious at being interrupted and
now quite carried away by his emotion, ‘that in my opinion,
Charles, you’re still suffering from the effects of your bereavement
and it’s clear you need to get right away from the diocese in order to recuperate. Of course I accept that you feel you’re responding
to the will of God, but –’

‘
Then accept it,’ I said, ‘Mr Archdeacon.’

I was reminded of the
Titanic at
the moment when it hit the
iceberg. I never raised my voice; I merely drained it of warmth as
I underlined his subordinate rank, and the next moment Malcolm
was very pale and still, no longer calling to mind images of an
over-confident liner or even of a militant despot, but of a
little
boy
who had just been caned by a favourite teacher. He managed to
say stiff-lipped: ‘Yes, Bishop,’ and out of his sight behind my desk
I wiped my sweating palms upon my trousers.

Another deep silence ensued.

‘
Well!’ said Nigel brightly at last, in the manner of a hostess at a vicarage tea-party where two guests had been so ill-bred as to quarrel over the last cucumber sandwich. ‘Now that we’ve estab
lished the line we’re taking on St Paul’s, should we go on to discuss
the Cathedral?’

I longed to postpone the discussion but I knew I had to use the
advantage I possessed now that Malcolm had been reduced to
submission. Loathing my job more than ever, I leant forward in
my chair and said with the calm authority of the chairman who
was finally in control of his board: ‘Yes, let’s go on.’

‘
The question is whether I should make a visitation,’ I said. ‘I’m
still not convinced this is the best way forward, but I’m open to
persuasion. Nigel, let’s hear from you again.’

‘
I think there’s an increasingly strong case for a visitation,’ said
Nigel. ‘Malcolm rang me on Saturday, Charles, to tell me about
your interview with Paul Dalton and his disclosure that Aysgarth
has well and truly hijacked the Appeal. I was appalled – and cer
tainly I believe it’s quite wrong in principle that the Dean should
be in sole control of the Appeal fund while those Canons abdicate
their responsibilities out of sheer spinelessness. If you
make a visita
tion
you’ll at least be able to recommend that in future all major appeals are run in a professional
manner
by a team of qualified
laymen. Also, Aysgarth’s shady flirtation with Christie’s really was
beyond the limit of behaviour acceptable for a senior churchman,
and in your visitation report you’d have the chance to deliver a
reprimand which would make it very clear to the public that the Church doesn’t condone such antics. I do think it’s unlikely that
Aysgarth’s in a financial mess and I can’t believe he’s done anything
c
riminal, but he definitely deserves to have the Riot Act read to
him.’

I turned to my chastened Archdeacon. ‘Malcolm, would you
please be good enough to state the case as you see it?’

Malcolm gave a small cough and said with care: ‘I wouldn’t
disagree with anything Nigel’s said except for that last sentence
about the likelihood of a financial mess. The truth is we can’t turn
a blind eye to the possibility that something’s gone very wrong
with the Appeal. Aysgarth may be the most gifted fund-raiser in the Church of England, but that doesn’t mean he’s incapable of
making a mistake.’

‘
I’m afraid that’s true,’ said Nigel with reluctance. ‘He could
easily have got over-confident, made a bad error, tried to redeem
it and ended up making the mess worse.’

‘
I agree it’s hard to believe he’d embark on any criminal activity,’
said Malcolm, becoming more confident, ‘but law-abiding people
do get sucked into the downward spiral of embezzlement if they
make one crucial financial mistake: it’s not unknown. And think
of Aysgarth’s character. He’s a clever man, he’s an able man, but he does have a habit of taking dangerous risks when he’s under
pressure, and I don’t think we can ignore this trait when assessing the present situation. We need a visitation not just to recommend
rules about future fund-raising and deliver a reprimand about the
Christie’s flirtation but to expose the truth about what’s going on
in the accounts.’

‘
But if there really is a financial disaster being concealed,’
objected Nigel, ‘surely it would be better for the Church if we
mopped up the mess as discreetly as possible?’

‘
We’ve now reached the point where we should consider the
arguments against a visitation,’ I said. Nigel’s just outlined one of
them: the worse the mess, the less appropriate a visitation becomes.
We also can’t avoid the unfortunate fact that Aysgarth and I have
a difficult relationship, and a visitation would make that embarrass
ingly public. Maybe I’m being too influenced by my guilt about
this state of affairs, but I think there’s a serious risk we could make
a visitation for the best of motives and yet achieve nothing but
the washing of a lot of dirty Church linen in public.’

‘
What we need,’ said Nigel after we had all paused to view the
horns of the dilemma on which we were impaled, ‘is hard evidence
of financial mismanagement. Our difficulties arise because of insuf
ficient information.’

Malcolm said reasonably enough: ‘But how can we get hard
evidence without making a visitation?’

This indeed
was
the problem. None of us could imagine Ays
garth showing us the accounts in a burst of friendly generosity.
‘Eureka!’ exclaimed Nigel suddenly. ‘I’ve got it — the truth is we
can make all the deductions we need just by putting Aysgarth
under pressure and seeing how he reacts.’

‘
Wonderful!’ said Malcolm, now displaying marked signs of a
full recovery. ‘Can you recommend a shop which would supply us
with a thumbscrew and a rack?’

‘
Never mind the thumbscrew and the rack!’ declared Nigel, so aglow with triumph that he was prepared to meet Malcolm’s sar
casm with good humour. ‘All we need is our bishop!’

I said with increasing foreboding: ‘I confess I’ve never quite
seen myself as an instrument of torture.’

‘
No, listen, Charles, it’s all very simple. You ask Aysgarth if you can take a quick look at the accounts in order to quash a rumour
about the Appeal which has been circulating at the diocesan office
since the Christie’s fiasco. If he’s innocent, there’s no reason why
he shouldn’t let you have a look — he’ll be keen to quash the
rumour. But if he’s guilty, he’ll either refuse or procrastinate, and
then we’ll know where we stand.’

I was too appalled by the thought of such a scene to reply, and
it was left to Malcolm to make the obvious response.

‘
It won’t work, Nigel,’ he said. ‘You don’t know our Mr Dean
as we do. He’s quite capable of refusing to show us the accounts
even if he’s innocent — he’d see it as a chance to underline his
autonomy at the Cathedral.’

‘
Yes, but supposing Charles threatens him with a visitation. If
Aysgarth’s innocent I bet he’d then backtrack quickly and cough
up the accounts – he wouldn’t go on being bolshie once he’d
realised that bolshiness was provoking the one procedure which
strips away that cherished autonomy of his. But if he’s guilty he’ll
play for time and try any desperate manoeuvre to put off the evil
day when the accounts have to be disclosed. He might even call
Charles’s bluff and invite a visitation in the knowledge that a visita
tion takes some time to set up.’

I found myself at a loss for words.

‘
You could be right,’ said Malcolm slowly to Nigel. ‘In fact that’s
a line of thinking which seems to crack the entire problem.’
My feelings of foreboding immediately quadrupled.

‘
One big advantage of the scheme,’ added Malcolm with increas
ing enthusiasm,
‘is
that it would be certain to increase our knowl
edge in some way or another. We’re still unlikely to get concrete
proof of financial misconduct, but if Charles conducts the interview
on the lines you suggest, I do agree that he’s most unlikely to
emerge none the wiser.’

‘
And that in turn will help us make the correct decision about
a visitation and move out of our current impasse.’

‘Exactly!’

They turned to me to present the spectacle I had dreaded most:
a united front.

Privately cursing myself for the lack of incisiveness which had
fostered it, I said in despair: ‘I just have this terrible feeling that
we’re barking up the wrong tree. After all, if it hadn’t been for
the Christie’s fiasco we wouldn’t have thought of questioning the
state of the Appeal, and the fact is that the Christie’s episode could
be exactly what Aysgarth says it was: not evidence of financial mismanagement but of a publicity spree which misfired. I dis
covered last night that he’s arranging an auction of work donated
by leading artists. Bearing that in mind, doesn’t it
seem
entirely
plausible that he was using the St Anselm manuscript to grab the
headlines so that he could gain maximum
press
coverage later for
the art auction? In short, what we’re witnessing could be none
other than the triumphant conclusion of a brilliantly successful
fund-raising campaign.’

‘
Fine,’ said Nigel. ‘In that
case
he’ll be delighted to show you
the accounts and we can all relax.’

I saw that defeat was staring me in the face. I also saw that a
horrific scene with Aysgarth was to be the price I had to pay for
getting my own way on La
ngley Bottom – if I were sensible
. I
fear one of the hallmarks of a successful corporate manager is
knowing exactly when and how to appease his subordinates after
an unappetising display of power.

‘So be it,’ I said. ‘I’ll see Aysgarth.’

‘
I’m sure that’s the right decision, Charles,’ said Nigel, realising
I needed strong support.

‘
I agree,’ said Malcolm firmly, but added with uncharacteristic
meekness: ‘Charles, please could you explain why you’re now so reluctant to tackle Aysgarth? At the time we uncovered the Chris-
tie’s fiasco you were screaming for his head on a platter.’

‘
It’s one thing to scream for a head,’ said Nigel dryly, ‘but quite
another to hack it off. No bishop in his right mind would welcome
a bloodthirsty scene with that particular dean.’

‘
If only he’d retire! Incidentally, I’ve heard yet another report
that he’s become very cosy with Harriet March. Tommy Fitzgerald says she went to lunch at the Deanery yesterday, stayed to tea and
arrived with the Dean for evensong. Tommy says Aysgarth reeked
of claret.’

‘
I must say,’ I commented with a strength which surprised
me,
‘I’m getting very, very tired of Tommy Fitzgerald telling tales to
the Archdeacon whenever he sees Aysgarth enjoying the company
of an attractive woman.’

‘
But Charles, surely Tommy has reason to be alarmed when
he sees Aysgarth cavorting with La March? Tommy says that
according to the newspapers she sleeps with everything in
sight.’

In that case Aysgarth must be a welcome holiday for her.’

‘
I’d love to know which newspapers Tommy reads,’ murmured
Nigel. ‘I can’t wait to switch from
The Times.’

‘
If there was anything improper going on between Aysgarth and
Mrs March,’ I said to Malcolm, ‘Dido wouldn’t have allowed the
two of them to drink tea privately together yesterday – as I’m told
they did. And Aysgarth didn’t reek of claret. There was just the
faintest of aromas.’

‘
There you go, taking a soft line again!’ said Malcolm, baffled.

‘
I think it’s called Christian charity, Malcolm,’ said Nigel, closing
the discussion on a truly ferocious note.

‘
Is there any other urgent matter,’ I said rapidly, ‘which we
should discuss before we end this meeting?’

Nigel said he thought not. ‘But if you’re really determined to
pick up the reins again without taking further time off,’ he added,
‘perhaps you’d like me to look out the most important of the
current files and dictate some explanatory notes on them to Miss
Peabody.’

I thanked him and said that would be very helpful. The meeting
then broke up, but although Nigel departed to the office Malcolm appeared to be glued to the seat of his chair. He had also become very pink and had embarked on a series of nervous little coughs. With a sinking heart I realised that my ordeal at the hands of my
colleagues was not yet over.

I steeled myself for a tidal wave of archidiaconal remorse.