Abuse: The Complete Trilogy (15 page)

Chapter 11.

“I only have
sex with my friends, my clients and the people I love. This doesn’t limit me
much.”

— Renata
Koreman

~~~

Renata
Koreman

I’ve left the
bedroom door open, but Gustave knocks courteously anyway. “Renata,
Monsieur
Marks
has arrived.”


Merci,
Gustave. Please show him in.”

My eyes widen in
surprise when Joshua is ushered into my room, with Max his guide dog by his
side. Max is somber and well-behaved as he’s working, but I can see from the
light in his eyes, and his upright stance, he’s glad to see me.

Gustave nods, and
shuts the door.

“Wow,” I breathe
appreciatively. “You look amazing.”

The last time I
saw Joshua, he was wearing a yellow Polo shirt buttoned right to the top, and
beige trousers with a leather belt cinched in tight at his waist. A more nerdy
presentation would be hard to imagine.

Right now Joshua
is dressed to kill and oh Lord, what a difference it makes. Crisp white
button-down shirt, a modern, quiet tie, and a three-piece tailored silk suit.
The black sunglasses he’s wearing are a designer brand.

He stands up
straight, his shoulders squared—André must’ve taught him that. A tall, slim man
in his prime, the ensemble gives him a confident, mature air. He looks so
handsome. I’m blown away. André has definitely worked his magic.

Joshua gives me a
shy smile. “Do you… like it?”

“Very, very much.
It was worth every penny and it’s a real compliment to me.”

“That’s what André
said. He told me when visiting a lady it is important to look one’s best as a
sign of respect.”

“Thank you
Joshua. You’ve made me feel quite special.”

His open smile is
more self-assured. “He’s given me physical exercises to do every day, too. He
says this will make me fitter and more attractive to the opposite sex.”

“He’s right.” I
laugh while peering up at his face

I move toward him.
While I’m sorry he’s blind, I’m extraordinarily pleased he can’t see me. I can
study him all I want. It’s so liberating. Having someone’s eyes on me sometimes
freaks me out.

“Please, come
forward, about twelve steps ahead of you is a bed. Do you mind sitting there?
I’ve put the doggie bed out for Max, if you want to take him out of harness.”

“OK.”

We sit beside
each other and Joshua takes the harness off of Max. Max is eight years old, but
when taken out of his working gear he really lets go, snuffling and prancing
like a puppy. Joshua smiles and I laugh.

I show Max his cushion
and give him the leather chew toy I’ve brought, which immediately makes his
day. He turns a few circles, then settles down to gnaw on his toy.

I return to the
bed and sit down beside Joshua, my stomach alive with excitement. In chatting
with him via email I feel as if I know him. He’s such a dichotomy. Brilliant
yet socially inexperienced. Confident and mature in his area of expertise, yet
innocent as a child when it comes to women.

Somewhat rigid
and obsessive, Joshua’s disability is also his gift. A fanatically dedicated
rocket scientist has got to be a good thing, right?

In school, the
way he communicated to his peers was too direct and honest. Unable to fully
comprehend nuances and innuendos, he struggled with friendships. Once he lost
his sight it gave him an excuse to further isolate himself from others. The
success in his field of interest must have made his need for social interaction
seem even less important.

I want to teach
him it’s not that difficult to relate to the opposite sex. I’m also honored to
be the one to show him the wholesome fun and joy of lovemaking.

“Are you ready
for this?” I ask.

“Yes.”

“You don’t have
to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“I know.”

“Will you take off
your sunglasses?” I ask.

After a slight
hesitation, he frowns, but takes them off. There’s some minor scarring around
his eyes and his open, light blue eyes are cloudy. It’s obvious he’s blind. It
appears he’s also sensitive about the subject. Is he worried how he looks?

“Thank you.
There’s very little scarring. You’re a handsome man, Joshua.”

“I am?”

“Definitely,” I
assure him.

I take his
sunglasses and set them on the bedside table. It’s so easy working with this
guy. He can’t see anything, so I don’t have to concern myself with meeting his
gaze.

When I pick up
both of his hands, one in each of my hands, a small tremor runs through his
body. Other than when I gave him a gentle kiss on the lips at the coffee shop,
we’ve never touched each other.

“Would you like
to feel my face?”

He nods. “Please.”

I place his
palms, one on each side of my head with his fingers touching my temples. He’s
tentative at first, but soon his face strains with interest as he focuses all
of his attention on me.

“I thought you
were older,” he says, “but you’re young. How old are you?”

“Twenty-two.”

Brow drawn down
in concentration, he nods, not surprised. Warm, probing fingers intently
explore my eyebrows and forehead. They trail along my cheeks, nose, jaw and
ears. This questing, impartial—yet absorbed exploration of my face is strangely
erotic.

His thumb
whispers along my lips, and my breath catches.

Blind people hear
everything.

At his
questioning head tilt of surprise, I say, “What you’re doing is very sensual,
Joshua. I imagined us having sex and the thought excited me.”

His surprise
turns to an innocent joy. “I see,” he says. “Wikipedia says there are many
erogenous zones. In addition to the nipples and the genital area, many are
aroused when their eyelids, eyebrows, temples, shoulders, hands, arms and hair
are subtly touched.”

I curb a laugh at
this no doubt direct recitation. “That’s very true, for me anyway. I also like
kisses,” I hint.

“You do?” he
says, and a rosy blush appears on his cheeks. Is that embarrassment or pleasure
I see on his face?

Doctor Marks is a
genius. He told me via email he was going to research the subject of sex, and I
suspect he went a little overboard. He’s such an interesting guy and so
different from anyone I’ve ever met before.

One hand curls
around my neck, and the other cups my cheek as he tentatively leans toward me
and presses his lips cautiously against mine. He’s warm, and sweet and
uncertain. Every bit of his awareness is concentrated on me.

It’s a sensual
delight to be the focus of his attention.

He smells so good
and I love the feel of his kiss. His breath is warm on my skin. I’m supposed to
be monitoring him, making sure he’s OK, but the man has me mindless already.

Initial moments
with someone for the first time are a huge turn on for me.

I didn’t ask for
a kiss—I asked for “kisses.” Joshua takes my suggestion literally, and presses
his sensuous lips in soft feathering kisses all over my face and neck.
Meanwhile, he continues to “see me” with his fingers, stroking my hair, the tips
of his fingers exploring every part of me, even my ear lobes.

I’ve never been
so thoroughly caressed. From my shoulders up, I don’t think there’s an inch of
flesh he’s missed.

He nuzzles along
my ear and the column of my neck, two places that make my panties instantly
wet. I throw my head back and give a deep groan of pleasure. Disturbed by this
unfamiliar sound and afraid of hurting me, he recoils, even taking his arms
away. His expression is questioning and anxious.

“No, no, that
feels so good. Don’t stop,” I encourage him, easily meeting his sightless gaze.
“You can lick, suck, and even bite, too.”

His face
brightens. After all his intense study, he hadn’t thought of this.

“Wait,” I say.
“Do you want to touch more of me?”

He nods.

I stand up, grab his
hands and pull him to his feet directly in front of me. Max stands up for a
moment, stares at us curiously but then lays back down.

“Want to find out
what I’m wearing?” I say playfully. “Or do you want to just take what I’m
wearing, off?”

My attempt at
light humor surprisingly sobers him. “Both,” he says quietly, and there’s that
sweet blush again. I watch his Adam’s apple move in his throat as he swallows.
I’ve seen this in clients before. Joshua’s nervous and turned on.

Once he gets past
this initial anxiety, he’ll be fine. Joshua needs me, and I adore being
needed.
I know I can help him.

My lips curve up
as a tendril of amusement adds to my growing arousal. His eager interest and
his innocence are making me hot as hell.

I place his hands
on my shoulders. “Can you figure out how to do it?”

“I think so,” he
says in a low voice.

His movements
become much less tentative as firm hands roam over my sheath dress. He skims
down from my shoulders, along the sides of my breasts and to mid-thigh where
the hem of the dress is.

Without
hesitation, he slowly raises the slinky material up and over my head, dropping
it casually on the floor.

I giggle. “Good
job.”

Joshua grins a
flash of white teeth. His hands reach out and grip my bare shoulders, while his
thumbs find my bra straps. He turns his head and tilts an ear toward me—as a
blind man, his ears are important. I guess it’s his equivalent of seeing.

God, I love the
concentration on his face. He spends time tracing my shoulders and collarbones
with intense interest, curiosity and lust.

His breathing
changes as his fingers follow my bra strap down to my breasts. A soft noise
comes out of his mouth, a kind of “
umm
” sound. Right about now I’m
thinking
ummm
, too.

“Go ahead,” I
encourage him, when he discovers the front opening clasp to my bra.

His clever
fingers know exactly what to do. The man releases my bra and drops it to the
carpet as if he’s been doing this all of his life. Both hands cup my breasts
and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

I wish I had a
camera to take a picture. The look of astonished delight and almost reverence
in his expression is priceless.

I know I’m
getting well paid for this, but I swear to God. Joshua Marks, I’d do for free.

Chapter 12.

“At the touch
of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.”

― Plato

~~~

Renata
Koreman

My breasts grow
heavy and swollen; they ache. Joshua’s inexperienced touch eases them. Finding
my erect nipples with each thumb, he inhales sharply and traces them and my
areola with fascination.

“Your nipples are
hard but your breasts are so soft,” he marvels.

“You can lick,
suck, kiss and bite there, too,” I whisper.

Joshua doesn’t
hesitate. He steps in closer and his suit brushes against me as he
instinctively wraps one arm around my back. He bends his blond head down to my
breast.

“Mm,” I sigh. I
swear I could come just from watching him.

As the heat of
his mouth encompasses my nipple, a lightning bolt of arousal tenses my core. My
breath catches. I squirm and rub my thighs together in an attempt to ease my
throbbing clit.

“That feels
good,” I murmur, and melt against him.

Encouraged by
this display of arousal, he swirls his tongue, nibbling and kissing while his
now confident, needy fingers trail over my flesh, continuing their determined
exploration.

A single-minded
male animal has taken over. Joshua’s doing just as he likes; what comes
naturally. He’s making his own noises now, soft tortured sounds of male arousal
and sexy, raw need.

There’s a fine
tremor in his body. Joshua’s shaking with desire. I am too. My legs feel weak;
I need to hold on to something.

“Please don’t
stop,” I gasp. My hands search purposefully under the jacket of his suit, gripping
his waist. Aching, needing, wanting; I pull myself against him, His body is
tense and hard. Mine feels soft and liquid.

“Mm,” he mumbles.
His mouth is too full of breast to reply.

“God, yes… yes,”
I say, as I slip out of my drenched panties.

With tacit
agreement, moving in unison, we urgently begin to undress him. He takes off his
jacket, while I reach for his tie, pulling it loose then starting to work on
the buttons of his shirt.

His skin is hot
and pale, but when his erection springs free, it’s engorged, thick and so damn
red. The swollen crown is almost purple. A bead of milky fluid sits at the tip.
Yum.

My eyes move to
his face. His features are harsh and fierce with lust. In part, this is the
ecstasy of arousal. It’s also the pain of gathering sexual tension, building
powerfully—right to the edge without release. The man needs to come… badly.

I reach down to
hold him, curling my fingers around his long, thick length and his cock jerks.
He gasps and his hands tighten in a convulsive grip on my shoulders, while his
hips instinctively thrust towards me at my touch.

The musky male
scent of him makes my mouth water. I want a taste, but he’s not ready for that.
Not yet.

“I dreamed of
this,” he murmurs in a deep, husky voice.

“Me too,” I
admit.

His body knows
exactly what to do. I swear—Joshua didn’t need to study a thing about sex. I’m
already so horny, but I restrain my yearning to jump on top of him and ride him
to completion. Damn, I want to fuck him silly.

If he seems
hesitant, that’s what I’ll do—but I think he’s already figured things out. He’s
had a week to think about this.

His cock is
incredibly hard and dripping. He won’t last long. That’s fine, because I won’t
either.

Breathing
raggedly, desperate and naked, we both fall onto the bed together.

Joshua lays on
top of me, his thick shaft pressing hard against my mound. I pull him to my
face for a real kiss. This time, he understands what I want and doesn’t hold
back. Warm and soft, his full lips slide deliciously over my own.

This
kiss goes
deep. His tongue sweeps inside and explores my mouth in a sexy, erotic dance.

The man not only
wants me, he
needs
me.

Nothing turns me
on more.

My breathing is
loud and harsh, my pulse speeds. I can hear blood roaring in my ears. My clit
feels so distended, pulsing wildly, right along with my racing heartbeat. We
each long to somehow get closer, both writhing and pressing frantically
together, savage and primal in our lustful abandon.

The sensation of
my stiff nipples brushing against the hairs of his chest, the weight of his
body upon mine, his ragged breathing and my own—it’s all building rapidly
toward something amazing.

“My God, you’re a
fast learner,” I rasp against his mouth, as I curl my arms around his neck. My
fingers rake through his tight, blond curls. I push my hips up toward his firm
body, moving to direct the hard heat of his erection. I moan when it presses
exactly where I need it.

There’s no way
Joshua could stop now. This inexperienced young man, without any real finesse,
has made me hotter than hell. I feel as though I might burst into flames.

“Can I be inside
of you?” he asks eagerly, in a hoarse voice.

“God, yes! Please.”

I’m drenched, hot
and throbbing. I spread my legs further and he reaches down between them, his
fingers at my entrance. He gasps in astonishment at the feel of my arousal. I
adjust myself and reach down to help guide him inside. His cock jerks when I
touch it.

When the rigid
length of his shaft enters me, Joshua exhales with a heavy grunt of pleasure.

I see stars as he
pushes inside. We just had maybe thirty minutes of foreplay and that’s more
than enough for me. The feel of his thickness stretching my sensitive tissues sends
me right to the edge of release. My back arches and my whole body stiffens.
Even my toes curl.

Joshua doesn’t
move.

I remain still
too, except for the tightening of my internal channel, throbbing with
pre-orgasmic pulses. Overwhelmed, I shut my eyes in an effort to absorb these
erotic sensations. Holding my breath, I also struggle to postpone what I know
is going to be a powerful climax.

“Oh God,” I
whisper, and it sounds like a prayer. I don’t think I can hold back.

“Can I…” he
gasps, his whole body trembling. “Renata, I want to… is it OK… if I move?”

“Yes! Move,
Joshua, please!” I beg. “Don’t stop. Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me now!”

“Yes,”
he
growls with fierce pleasure.

Aware of my
impending climax or not, Joshua reacts instantly. He begins to pound himself
inside of me in rapid stokes, pushing in to me, pulling out, in, out, faster
and faster, in, further in, in, in! Panting heavily, he drives himself inside
of me—balls deep, over and over again.

My roiling sexual
tension unexpectedly explodes.

“Yes, yes, God
yes!” I give a full-throated scream.

I’m coming. I
can’t stop myself, my internal muscles clench around him. He doesn’t slow.
Urgent, fast thrusts demonstrate how close he is. His balls slap hard against
my buttocks as I writhe and convulse uncontrollably.

He finally
attains his own release with a sexy, guttural groan. My body continues to shudder
with pleasure. When his hot seed fills me, I think I climax again—unless it was
one of the longest orgasms of my life.

I almost snicker
out loud, as I guess I can’t rule that out.

When we both
begin to come down from our intense brush with nirvana, Joshua rolls off of me
and lays on his back. We didn’t use a condom, but that’s no big deal. He was a
virgin and I’ve been tested and am on birth control. We’ll do condoms later
today, as it’s something he needs to learn.

I curl up against
his warm chest. My head rests upon him, his arm around me, draped across my
back. His heartbeat thunders in my ear. We both breathe heavily, slowly
catching our breath.

“Is it…” he says
quietly, “… is it always like that?” Joshua asks, while his pulse and breathing
return to normal.

“No,” I murmur
with one hand resting over his slowing heartbeat. “It’s different every time.
Sometimes it’s even better. Since this was your first time, it probably feels
extra special because you have nothing to compare it to.”

Triumphant, he
laughs and his broad boyish grin captivates me. “I can’t believe I thought I
didn’t need this in my life.”

I smile. “Now you
know.”

His body is
relaxed, his expression serene. Playing with my hair, he lifts one long blonde
lock and inhales deeply. “I love the smell of your hair,” he says, running his
fingers over my head, stroking along my scalp. “Thank you, Renata. I’m so
grateful.”

I could tease him
and joke about thanking
him
for such an excellent climax, but something
in his countenance makes me hold back. Sharing sexual pleasure is nothing new
to me, but I suspect our time together has completely changed his life.

“You’re welcome.”

He shakes his
head. “To have you here with me, touching me and breathing the same air—it’s a
miracle. It feels like I’m living inside of a perfect dream.”

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