Admission of Love (28 page)

Sighing, he parked his truck next to her car and turned off the ignition. Deshawn had tried to talk him out of coming, telling him he should be more focused on trying to talk to Chloe. But Chloe left to be with another man, so he had no desire to talk to her. But he had to settle things with Al. Their friendship would never be the same of course, but he didn’t want them to be hostile toward each other like their last meeting. He just hoped he wasn’t making things worse instead of better.

∞

Alicia heard a vehicle turn into her yard and moved from where she was looking through the want ads in neighboring Charleston’s local newspaper to look out her living room window. She gasped in shock, surprise and pleasure.

Knowing she had but seconds to spare, Alicia raced to her bedroom. She decided to think positive about Devon coming to her house. To her that was a good sign. She was already well aware that Chloe had finally dragged herself back to New York.

This time she was going for it. For years she held back on expressing her love for him, and look where it got her. Nowhere. She just hoped he was as ready for her as she was for him!

∞

“Alicia?!!”

Devon’s eyes widened as he looked at the woman who stood in the doorway. It was Alicia, but just a new and better version of her.

“Devon? Hi,” she yawned. “You got me up out of bed. Come in.”

He stepped into the house behind her, immediately overwhelmed by the scent of peaches. “You’re in bed at two in the afternoon?” he asked as he took a seat on the living room couch.

Alicia nearly grimaced. “Uhm, I’m not feeling too well,” she lied easily as she eyed him.
God, he looks good!

She sat back and crossed her legs, purposefully causing the satiny robe she wore to fall open, exposing her legs from the thigh down. She nearly jumped with glee when she saw his eyes dip down to look.

Devon quickly averted his gaze, more than nervous. Was Alicia trying to seduce him? He moved down on the sofa, away from her, putting more space between them. She certainly looked prettier with her hair cut in that new shorter style and makeup on.

Wait a minute?

Makeup on and she just got out of bed? He instantly smelled trouble, with a capital “T,” especially as she began to swing the leg she had crossed, causing the robe to fan open and expose a thick smooth thigh and . . . !

He gulped nervously. She was naked beneath the robe! He was ready to say what he came to say and haul it out of there. Clearing his throat, he began, “Al, I came to talk about all the crap that went down last month. You and I were real good friends, and I just can’t believe the person I know you to be would be so vindictive.”

Alicia stiffened. She didn’t want to talk about that, especially if he was about to defend Chloe. Quickly she thought of the best way to deal with steering the conversation away from a road she didn’t want to travel. “Look Devon, let’s be friends again. We’ll both just apologize for whatever wrongs we’ve done to each other and move on from here, ’kay?”

He nodded slowly but was not satisfied. She still hadn’t admitted to the wrong she did against Chloe, and if she didn’t see fault in her actions how could he jump back into their old friendship again? “Al you called
The Star Gazer
—"

Before he could finish his sentence Alicia stood and untied the robe, letting it fall to a peach puddle of satiny material around her bare, newly manicured feet. Devon immediately turned his head. “Alicia, what the hell are you doing?”

She took a step forward as he moved to stand using her hands to push him back down on the couch and straddle his lap. She trembled in anticipation, nearly dying from wanting him.

Devon grabbed the hands that were rubbing his chest. “Stop this, Alicia! Damn!”

The desire and love this woman had for him was in her eyes clearly now. There was no mistaking her actions or her feelings. How could he have been so blind?

She whispered, “I love you Devon.”

Chloe had never told him those words. A vision of the slender temptress astride a faceless man filled his imagination. Jealousy ate him alive, anger at her leaving pained him, and her betrayal stung.

Alicia took his hands and guided them to her small, pert breasts. “Please Devon. I love you so.”

With all the emotions raging inside of him, Devon lost good sense. Why should he fret over Chloe, a woman who didn’t love him, who cheated on him and then left him for another man, when a very naked and willing woman sat astride him. Devon lowered his head, about to capture a breast in his mouth.

Alicia arched her back in anticipation and sighed with love, desire and victory.

Chapter Twenty-one

This is all so different from my last dinner party.

Chloe took a sip of champagne from her Waterford crystal flute, letting the chilled, expensive liquid fill her mouth to savor the taste, before she let it gently flow down her throat. Her eyes scanned the crowd of thirteen people mingling in her living room. The bartender was set up in the corner of the room by the wide bay windows, and her guests enjoyed any drink they desired.

Everyone was fashionably dressed in designer clothing varying from casual elegance, such as the Shaka King wardrobe some of the men preferred, to the traditional tailored suit look. The women were adorned with priceless jewelry. The air was heavy with “I’m rich, I’m famous and I know it.”

Chloe stood alone by the entrance, her arms draped across her chest, her hand gently holding the expensive crystal flute. She looked stunningly beautiful in a silver leather halter and matching leather pants that clung to her curvaceous frame.

She was surrounded by music industry heavyweights, fashion industry insiders, and entertainment moguls of the black elite, but all she thought of was Holtsville. She missed the tranquil nights, clear, star-filled skies, acres of land with emerald green grass and wildflowers, and her beautiful house which she loved dearly. She would much rather be around Nana Lil and her brash and blunt personality, or Cyrus’s nosy gossiping disposition, or Deshawn’s roguish charm. And Devon, well she missed
everything
about that man.

What she wouldn’t give to be swinging on her porch as she lay back in his strong arms, her head on his chest just watching the stars scattered in the sky.

This dinner had been Liv’s idea, and Chloe had allowed her to plan the whole thing, from what to serve to whom to invite. The only people Chloe had insisted on attending were Anika, of course, and Jeffrey. It was just one night in Liv’s pre-planned week of events to get the buzz going about Chloe before the awards show tomorrow night.

Sighing, she took another leisurely sip of her champagne. Could Devon be here in her world of designer originals, expensive champagne, celebrity friends, glamour, wealth and fame? No, she couldn’t envision it and not because he wasn’t good enough, but because she knew he would not want to be around these people, some of whom she called friends. She smiled as she imagined Devon and Jeffrey in a conversation. Now
that
was hilarious!

The awards show was the next evening and originally her plans had been to return to Holtsville that Saturday. But within three simple weeks everything was different . . . everything had changed.

Needing to be alone, Chloe left the party and walked down the hall to her bedroom. Once inside she closed the door, the dark quiet of the room offering some comfort to her. Sighing, she crossed the plush carpet to sit on the bed, her flute of champagne still in her hand. This she sat on the nightstand next to the cordless phone.

Not once had Devon called, although she spoke to Nana Lil nearly every night. Chloe had honestly thought he would realize that he was wrong about her and call by now to say so. Obviously he still thought she was involved with Calvin. How could he think so little of her?

How could she still miss him and want him so?

At night, with all the lights off in the apartment and she alone in bed in this room, she remembered their passion and actually shivered from wanting him. A wave of homesickness filled her. Needing some connection to home, she turned on the lamp and picked up the phone, quickly dialing the long distance number.

The phone rang just two times before it was picked up.

“Hello.”

Chloe gasped, her heart hammering against her chest, her breathing shortened. She knew without a doubt that the deeply masculine and solemn sounding voice was Devon’s!

It had been nearly three weeks since she’d heard that voice ... his voice. She was instantly filled with a deep longing to be by his side again.

“Hello,” Devon said again, his tone now clearly agitated. “Who would you like to speak with?”

But Chloe said nothing, unsure if he would burst into another angry tirade at the sound of her voice on the phone.

“Chloe . . . what are you doing in here?”

She whirled around, frantically waving her hand to silence Anika, who had just walked into the room talking loudly. Quickly she pushed the button to disconnect the line.

Had Devon heard Anika call out her name? If he had, then he knew it was her sitting on the phone wordlessly, like a child playing a phone prank. Chloe flushed with embarrassment. She could only pray Anika’s voice had not carried across the large expanse of the room.

“Who were you on the phone with, Chloe?” Anika asked, closing the door behind her.

Chloe looked down at the cordless phone in her hand, still affected by the sound of Devon’s deep masculine voice. “No one,” she lied as she sat the phone back on its base.

Anika sat beside her on the bed. “Call him, Chloe,” she said softly as she nudged Chloe’s shoulder with her own.

There was no need to explain who “him” was. “No, Anika.”

“You miss him, so call him. You’re miserable without him and you love him to death.”

“I do not love him,” she said vehemently, refusing to admit to the feelings. She thought of Calvin’s betrayal and how she had been blind to his affairs because of “love.” Couldn’t two people be involved without losing themselves to each other completely?

Anika shook her head in amazement, reaching for Chloe’s discarded flute of champagne and taking a sip. “Chloe, I don’t understand you, and frankly you’re beginning to bug me.”

Chloe’s mouth dropped open in shock. “What—”

Anika held up her hand. “No, let me finish. I know that Calvin hurt you, honey, but that was four years ago now. And I know that you never really got over your father not being in your life. You’re a smart woman, so I know you understand that you cannot judge every man by either of them.”

“My sire has nothing to do with this.”

Anika held up her hand again. “It’s obvious that you feel the two men you gave your love to betrayed you, and you’re afraid to open up your heart again. I’m sorry that your father never wanted to know your love and that Calvin betrayed it, but that has nothing to do with Devon, your feelings for him, nor the type of man he is.”

She took Chloe’s hand in her own with a firm grasp. “Honey, you have got to get over Calvin, and yes, you have to come to grips with your father not being in your life.”

“You’re wrong because I’m completely over Calvin.”

“No you’re not. You’ve been dodging this man for years, afraid to confront him the way that you need to get him out of your life once and for all. If you would just stand up to him and stop running. Learn that it’s okay to be in the same room with him and not have to leave, like you nearly did at your own farewell party.” Anika looked her in her eyes, seriously. “Sometimes I think you’re worried that he’ll actually talk you out of your panties again. And the way you run from him, he probably thinks so too. And that gives him more of a reason to chase you. You have to show yourself and Calvin that you are
so
over him.”

Chloe’s throat constricted in pain. She knew that all her friend’s words of advice were true. Tears welled in her eyes and she swallowed them hack with anguish. All of it, the pain, the betrayal, the rejection, the jealousy, and the mistrust was fresh, as if it all happened just moments ago. Calvin and her faceless father had shaped her into a woman afraid to love a good man.

Chloe wrapped her arms around her body. She let the tears fall freely down her cheeks. Anika hugged her friend, aching with the same pain she knew she felt. “Baby, I can’t force you to do anything. But you, my compadre, are so deep in love with Devon that it’s just too late to try to fight it now. So you better accept it and swim with the current, or keep denying it and drown.”

∞

“Good night and thanks for coming.”

Chloe waved to the last of her guests and closed the front door behind them. Even Anika had left due to an early morning appointment she had. But of course, before she left she squeezed Chloe tightly and whispered, “Prove to yourself that Calvin is nothing to you and then realize that Devon is everything to you.”

Anika had a way of making everything seem so easy. Chloe sighed stepping out of her clothes just as her phone rang. On the second ring she picked it up. “Hello.”

She stiffened at the sound of his voice before forcing herself to relax. “You’re just the man I need to speak with.”

∞

The half hour it took for him to reach her apartment gave Chloe the chance to change into a bulky sweatsuit and compose her words. When the knock sounded on her front door she took a deep breath before opening it. “Hello, Calvin.”

He smiled as he walked past her into the foyer. He obviously thought he had succeeded in his campaign to win her back. Chloe nearly choked at the idea.

“Needless to say, I was surprised by your sudden offer for me to come over, Cat.” He removed his lambskin leather jacket of a buttery caramel. It perfectly offset the ivory mock neck sweater he wore with stone-washed loose-fitting jeans. Even the leather boots were the exact same color as the coat.

He always did have style,
she thought, as she hung the jacket up in the small closet off the hall. She wasn’t surprised at all to see Gucci on the label inside the coat.

“Calvin, I—”

When she turned to face him he pulled her into a tight embrace. Her lips were pressed down upon with soft, once-familiar lips, her senses overwhelmed by the scent of his Joop! cologne.

She felt absolutely nothing. How could she when she instantly remembered the sight of him in bed with another woman naked and writhing beneath him? Chloe struggled to be free of his hold and his kiss. At least now she knew that his effect on her was far below what she had imagined all these years. Anika was right, she had been afraid that Calvin had the power to smooth-talk her into bed, but no more!

“This is not what I called you over here for, Calvin.” With a hard shove of her hands on his chest, she pushed him away finally.

Just as quickly he took a step toward her again and grabbed her hand, pressing it to his erection. “Don’t you see what you do to me?”

Chloe grabbed the fleshy sack beneath it instead, and he immediately jumped back as she started to tug hard. “Anyone with a skirt does that to you.”

“Okay, okay. Truce?” he asked as he eyed the frozen, hostile stare on her face.

“Whatever,” she answered flippantly.

Calvin threw his best smile on his handsome face. At one time she would have given the world to see him smile at her like that, and he knew it. But she just grimaced in return.
This isn’t working out like I planned.

“I need to talk to you about you calling my house in Holtsville. How did you get my number, and once you did get it, why did you use it? I want you to stop harassing me,” she finished firmly, walking past him to enter the living room where she took a seat on the sofa.

He followed, taking a seat beside her. “What’s this crap about harassment? Surely that’s too harsh a term for a man willing to fight to have the woman he loves back in his life.”

Chloe shook her head in amazement. “It is when the woman doesn’t want to be back in your life. How did you get my number, Calvin?” she asked again, staring at him hard.

“I hired a P.I.”

“You what?” she exclaimed, her voice near a shriek.

“Hey, I was getting desperate,” he explained with a shrug. “I love you, Chloe. A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.”

She shook her head in amazement. “You don’t cheat on someone you love. You don’t screw another woman in the bed you have shared with the woman you love. You don’t lie. You don’t disrespect her.” She paused before continuing. “You know what, Calvin?”

“What?” he said in a silky charming voice, expecting more from her and about to get less.

“You are so stupid.”

Chloe looked at the handsome man sitting in front of her. This man had once been her world, his kisses had moved mountains for her, but his betrayal had nearly destroyed her. He had delivered a crushing blow to her ability to love again. She might not be able to confront the other man in her life who had betrayed her more deeply than any man ever could, but she could finally face this one.

She knew for sure that she did not need or want him in her life in any way. And she was going to make sure he understood that.

“Calvin, I hope you realize that what I am about to say to you, I mean from the bottom of my heart. There is a better chance for a snowball staying frozen in hell than you and I getting back together. I don’t want you, I don’t need you. No, Calvin, seeing you does not make me want to run from you anymore. You have no effect on me. I do not love you and I do not care if you still love me. That’s your personal problem that you need to deal with. Leave me alone. Do not call my house, do not come by any of my homes, and if I ever find out you have hired a P.I. to investigate my private affairs again, I will make your life a living hell.”

She stood. His purpose in being here was served. He jumped to his feet and she knew without turning that he was about to touch her. “Don’t, Calvin,” she said with a firm voice that brooked no argument.