“You’re not spoiling it, Alanna.” Brian released the tension in his hands and jaw. “I’m glad you came even if you’d rather be with someone else right now.”
“Brian, it’s not—”
“It’s okay.” His brows arched over those chilled blue eyes. “We’re not on a date here or anything. We’re on a mission. Two writers, working on our articles and going to any
height
to make them great articles.”
I relaxed my shoulders a bit and was assured Brian realized this trip was for business only. Still, I felt bad for not being better company.
“Let’s see.” I squinted at the view below us. “I’ll make it up to you by taking the best photos I’ve ever taken. How’s that?”
“Sounds like a deal. I’ll see what I can do to help you along.” Brian let the plane dive, and I let out a yelp. “Didn’t you say you’re a daredevil?”
“Yeah,” I began, catching my breath, “but usually I’m the one driving on my daredevil stunts so I know what to expect.” I put my hand over my heart, trying to calm it. Brian’s eyes followed my hand and locked onto my chest. His lips parted slightly, and he bit down on his lower lip.
“I see. So if I warn you we’re going to nosedive into the mountain first, you’d be okay with that?” Brian angled the plane down again as he looked at me.
“I don’t think I’d ever be okay with the word
nosedive
while I’m sitting in the front seat of this toy plane.” I tightened my grip on the edge of my seat as the mountain peaks below rushed up at us again. My heart—already pretty bruised—was up in my throat now along with most of my stomach.
“Cut that out.” I swatted at Brian’s hand on the yoke.
“Hey, don’t beat up the pilot. If I’m knocked unconscious, then what will you do?”
“Good point,” I said. “Just don’t careen toward those sharp, rocky tips. I like being in one piece.”
“It’s a nice looking piece too. Be a shame to ruin it.”
Okay, second compliment he’d snuck in. I didn’t like the sound of it coming from Brian. Creeped me out for some reason. When I looked at his cool blue eyes on me, I couldn’t stop the shiver that rippled through me. A shiver like the one you feel when you catch the gangly fellow at the supermarket register checking out your boobs while he overhandles your shampoo bottle. Brian didn’t seem like the greasy type, but something about those out-of-place compliments and the way he looked at me—into me—had my skin crawling.
“Can you get us over to the other side?” I asked, distracting myself from the uneasiness. “I’d like to get a 360 of McKinley.”
“Anything you want, Alanna.”
Now everything he said sounded like an innuendo. He had seemed pretty understanding about my situation with Dale, but now it was as if he were trying to pick me up. Suddenly the cockpit was crowded. I was too close to Brian. Nowhere to escape.
I pressed myself against the passenger side window, taking photos and hoping to gain some space. Hoping I was overreacting. When I felt Brian’s hand on my back, I looked over my shoulder, unsuccessfully masking my growing concern.
“Don’t be afraid.” Brian’s face was soft, except for the icy fire in his eyes. Even in the shadow of his baseball cap, the crystal blue was piercing.
“I’m not afraid, Brian.” My voice was strained. Did he notice?
“Good.” He patted my back and let his hand glide down my arm. He tugged me back into the middle of my seat, closer to him. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
Didn’t
want
to hurt me?
“Why does that sound as if you
would
hurt me, though?” My palms were clammy by this point, and my heart raced. I held my camera at my chest as if it were a weapon.
Brian tightened his grip on the yoke. “It’s usually the only way.”
I was definitely having trouble swallowing now. “The only way?”
He removed his baseball cap revealing his scar. “This doesn’t exactly get the women crawling all over me on their own, you know.” He fingered the slice and closed his eyes for a moment. The trees swelled up below us, and I clawed the seat.
“It’s hideous. I know that.” Brian opened his eyes and pulled up the plane. I exhaled a breath as my mind scrambled. Brian was losing it, and if he lost it, we were going to have a rough landing.
“Sent my wife running, you know. She couldn’t take it. I had to relearn to walk after the accident. It was too much for her.” He put his cap back on. “So much for ‘in sickness and in health’, I guess. People say the words, but they don’t mean them.”
His jaw tensed again as we swept over a grove of trees past McKinley. We were flying dangerously low and branches scraped along the belly of the Super Cub as we cleared the area. The screech of chafing metal jarred Brian out of his monologue.
“Whoops.” He pulled up on the yoke, and we ascended.
“Some people aren’t equipped to deal with the tough times,” I offered in a voice I struggled to keep steady.
“My fault, I guess.” Brain shook his head. “I probably should have died. It would have been easier. Then I wouldn’t have to do what I’ve done.”
“What have you done, Brian?” I braced myself for his answer, but he didn’t supply one. Instead, he looked at me again. His gaze was glossy and unfocused. He didn’t look like the laid-back guy I had talked to at Moose Point. Not at all like the fellow nature author I had shared writer’s block with, or the man who had let me cry on him over Dale.
This man beside me now was distant, not in the present. He was back in the days after his accident. Back to when his wife had not supported him. He must have felt so alone. Part of me felt sorry for him.
Another part was scared shitless.
We flew on in complete silence for a few minutes before Brian heaved in a huge breath. I jumped at the sound of it.
“This time it’s different, you know,” he said.
“What do you mean?” I didn’t care for the waver in my voice.
“I’ve been watching you since you arrived in Fairbanks.”
“Great. We’ll add stalking to your resume.”
Clearly not a time for sarcasm.
“I picked the others randomly. They were there, walking down the street, buying groceries, mailing a letter, having dinner. But you…you stole my attention as soon as I saw you in Ram’s Den. I was going to come over to talk, but then the musher slid in next to you. I knew I didn’t have a shot once you saw him. Everything in your body language told me you were attracted to him.”
It hadn’t seemed like Brian had seen me that night in Ram’s Den but then again, once Dale had come in, I hadn’t paid attention to anything else in the bar.
“And in the library,” Brian continued, “his stupid mutt got to you first.”
He’d seen me then too. How could I have been so oblivious? In New York, every stranger was suspicious. I’d always been ready. But here, in Alaska, I had let my guard down in more ways than one apparently. How damned stupid.
“But I’ve got you now, don’t I?” Brian said. His voice crawled throughout me, raising goose bumps on my skin.
I stared at Brian, trying my hardest to figure out a.) the best course of action and b.) how in the hell I had ended up in this predicament. I didn’t want to say anything to send him completely off his rocker, but I didn’t want him to think I was too afraid to defend myself either.
“How do you know I wouldn’t have been interested in you, Brian?” Placating him seemed like my best defense. “You didn’t give me the chance to decide, now did you?”
His dark brows furrowed as he contemplated what I’d said. “I saw you, Alanna. As soon as Ramsden walked into the tavern, he captivated you.”
“Only because he was bold enough to sit right next to me.” Keep him talking.
“Cocky, you mean.”
“Either way. He had the balls to spark up a conversation. Where were your balls?”
Okay, that may have been too much, but sometimes fear made me mouthy. I couldn’t help it. I expected my camera to burst into bits at any moment such was my grip on it.
“You’ll excuse me if my balls are a bit shy.” Brian adjusted his cap. “I’ve been cast aside more times than I can count. Sure, I get the initial interest going. Women like my eyes, my smile, but eventually the hat comes off and…” He choked a little on his words. “The look of revulsion is what gets me. To see a woman’s face go from interested to repulsed in less than ten seconds is a blow to the ego.”
“Again, you didn’t give me the chance. How do you know my reaction would have been the same as other women?”
“I saw the look on your face in your room last night when you got a better view of my head, my scar. You didn’t look at Ramsden that way. I know your kind, Alanna.”
“You don’t know me.” I had to get him to land, but how?
“I’m going to get to know you. That’s what this trip is about.” He leered. “I’ll know every inch of you. I’ll know you better than Ramsden did.”
His words iced the blood in my veins. He licked his bottom lip as he peered out the front window of the Super Cub.
“Dale didn’t get to know me that well. We only spent a few days together.” I had thought he knew me, but he accused me of being a game-player. Thought I’d lead him along and then just drop him.
“Don’t lie to me, Alanna. It’s not necessary. I saw how you cried last night. Ramsden knows you…intimately. So will I. I have plans for us.”
“What are your plans exactly?”
“Do you want to spoil the surprise?”
“I think I’ve endured enough surprise for one morning,” I said. Still had room for more sarcasm next to my mounting fear. Go figure.
“Oh, there’s still more to come.” Brian’s tone was lilting as if he were truly enjoying this deranged little flight.
This was so one of those days when I should never have gotten up. I mean, yeah, weird shit like this happens all the time in New York. But here? And to me? Who would have thought it possible?
I peered out my window again and noticed an open field surrounded by pines ahead.
“Why don’t you land this sucker, and we’ll get on with your plans below.” I inched over toward Brian despite every instinct to stay far away from him. I reached over to pull his hat off, but he shirked away from me. He wasn’t as calm as his exterior suggested. Good to know. “Are you afraid of me, Brian?”
He snickered, but held his hat on his head. “No. Why would I be afraid of you?”
I tugged on his hat again. “Then don’t hide from me.” A book of sayings Meg would employ to make a guy putty in her hands would be extremely useful at this point. I wasn’t as good at that particular skill as she was.
Reluctantly, Brian slid his hand off his hat, allowing me to ease it off and toss it behind us. The scar was horrendous. No denying that. But any woman with half a heart wouldn’t use it to disqualify Brian. The psychotic tendencies, perhaps, but not the scar.
Concentrating on not letting my hand tremble, I ran my fingers through Brian’s short hair, skimming across the scar. He shuddered under my touch.
“Something like this shows how strong you were. You know, to be able to survive,” I whispered. He closed his eyes, and the plane angled downward toward the field. “Land, Brian. Please.”
He turned his head toward me, his eyes still closed. When he opened them, he was so close his breath warmed my cheeks. He surged forward, crushing his lips against mine, and I let out a screech.
“That’s what I thought.” His jaw tensed as he turned his attention back to piloting the plane.
“I…you surprised me. I wasn’t ready.” Major mistake, but he had moved so quickly. His rough kiss was a painful reminder of what I was losing in not being with Dale.
Shit, would I ever see Dale again? Would I ever see anyone again? Would I get the chance to explain to Dale that he was so much more than a game to me?
Struggling to swallow quietly and wondering if Brian could hear my pulse having a full-blown rock concert inside of me, I leaned in and pressed my lips to his neck. His muscles tightened, and I cupped his face. His chin was smooth shaven, not at all like Dale’s scruffy, whiskered one.
“Give me a chance, Brian.” I kissed a trail along his jaw though it caused my insides to flop. This whole thing might have been easier if Dale hadn’t stirred genuine feelings in me. Hadn’t I been faking my emotions every day before meeting him?
Now that I knew real love, pretending to be interested in Brian was downright painful. Death by crashing into a mountaintop would probably be even more so, therefore I forged a path with my lips along Brian’s cheek.
“If I land in Denali, you’ll run,” Brian said, though his voice had an encouraging note of pleasure in it. “They’ve all run, but I’ve been quicker.”
“Where will I run to? Denali is crawling with bears and such. Do you think I want to wander around down there alone?” I tried to make the idea seem ridiculous, but a face-to-face with a bear might not be so bad considering my current situation.
Brian chewed on his bottom lip as he thought about my reply. He didn’t trust me, but he wanted to.
“You can’t fly around forever. The gas tank on this toy has to be tiny. You have to land sometime.” I settled back into my seat. My retreat to my side of the cockpit bothered him, and Brian kept looking back to me, at the distance I had put between us.
He let out a low growl and coasted over the trees toward the open field. Landing a plane probably wasn’t regularly allowed in Denali, and I hoped that would bring out the authorities. Authorities with weapons preferably.
The Super Cub rolled to a stop as Brian powered down the single engine. We both removed our headphones. Now I had to think of a plan. Getting him to land had worked. Getting away was another matter.
“You hungry?” Brian asked.
Sure, a good abduction always builds up my appetite.
“Not yet.”
“You’re too busy thinking of a way to hurt me, aren’t you? So you can get away.” Brian reached behind us and grabbed his cap. Putting it back on, he stared at me.
“I’m not going to hurt you.” I even managed a chuckle with that one. Hollywood would be knocking down my door in no time. Assuming I made it home and could be behind my apartment door to hear them knocking.