Authors: Lourdes Bernabe
“Ok. Let’s chat.”
“I’m gunna have to take you down to the station for questioning. Sorry. It’s just the way it has to be done.”
“Am I under arrest Detective?” I tried to go through my mental rolodex of people who might have been lawyers. I was always forgetting both faces and names of people I’d met. Strangely enough, I’d never forget the names of people I killed. Those names I felt the need to remember.
“No. You are not under arrest. However, this is still a very important investigation and I need to take you down to the station. If you refuse, then I’ll find a reason to arrest you and take you down anyway. Do you understand?”
Whoa
. Detective Velez was now Detective No Bullshit. She wanted what she wanted and she wanted it now. She was my kind of woman. I took a seat in the back seat of Detective No Bullshit’s car and didn’t say another word. It wouldn’t have been so bad knowing I was going to prison for the rest of my life had I not met my mother’s eyes as we drove away.
I didn’t think it would ever be like that but in a way,
I’d always known this day would come. It was an occupational hazzard in my line of work. I wondered how they caught me. Which kill was I finally going down for? There were so many. Their faces marched through my memory but faded just as quickly. I couldn’t understand how this could happen when I’d always been so careful. As I tried to fight off the heavy dose of nervous energy ripping through my body, I wondered if I should even bother with a lawyer. How could I possibly get out of this mess I’d created?
My mother’s eyes looking at me in disgust and disappointment ripped deeper through my heart than anything they would do to me at the station.
Most likely, she’d meet me there with my father, and I would have to explain how I could have lived like this for so long.
They would ask question after question but still I’d never have the answers they sought. How could someone
so evil like me explain killing to people so pleasant like them? All they would really want to know is why? Why had I done this? And no answer would ever be good enough. They were happy people who lived happy lives without the burden of twisted motivations and sickly dark impulses. How could I have come from them? They would cry and grieve and eventually try to go on as if I had never existed at all.
Their hearts would harden at the mention of my name. My name would become something not to be mentioned over polite dinner conversation. I imagined
them altering photo albums and Christmas pictures to pluck me from their every lasting memory.
I dropped my head into my hands and prepared myself for the long road ahead. Perhaps I shouldn’t have killed Olivia today.
I guess that could have waited.
------
The temperature in the interrogation room must have been just above freezing. I was sure it was a tactic of some sort but I wasn’t a cop so I wouldn’t know what their tactics were. I also guessed that keeping me isolated in this room for two hours was also a tactic to wear me down.
If only there was a way to just get it over with and confess.
Hey, time out. No need to bring out the big guns. You caught me. Take me away.
If only the transaction could be that easy. But no. They’re cops and they’re going to want to drag this out as long as possible until every single stone had been turned, every T crossed, and every I titled.
My thoughts crossed over to which time I screwed up. It couldn’t have been Olivia, I’d just left her apartment. They weren’t that fast. I seriously doubted I could get busted for killing Paul. Actually, I had a hard time thinking back to any such time where I had
n’t been careful. I wasn’t one to take risks with my life. I’d always been thorough and I was sure that this was a mistake.
But perhaps it was all those murders I hadn’t committed that resembled my own. I’d questioned the police’s ability to separate the different killers. More often than not, a murder resembles some other murder somewhere else nearby. I shook my head at the thought. I wasn’t going down for someone else’s kill. I had more than enough of my own to go down for.
The windowless door swung open and Detective Velez took a seat across from me with a stack of papers and paper cup full steaming coffee.
I could use a cup of coffee too.
But it would probably be rude of me to ask. I wasn’t sure either way so I didn’t.
“Ms. Hedon, I don’t see any reason to beat around the bush. I assume you know why you’re here,” she couldn’t even look up to me as she spoke. She was lost in the world inside the pages of a thick manilla folder.
“Umm, I’m sorry. I don’t actually know why I’m here,” I replied. I decided to let them show me their cards first. I wasn’t giving in without at least a little resistance.
Detective Velez finally found herself capable of
finally looking up at me. But when she did, she looked confused. “Jolene, you really don’t know why you’re in this room talking to me right now?”
“I haven’t a clue,” I said. She didn’t think I’d budge that easily, did she?
“Haven’t you seen the news this morning? Spoken to your parents today? Anything?” she pressed.
“No. I was out running errands,” I lied. “I don’t watch the news often. Why? What is all this about Detective? Am I under arrest?”
“Under arrest Ms. Hedon?” the detective paused confused. “Greg Hedon? That
is
your brother isn’t it?” she asked.
“Yeah, so?” I didn’t get it. I hadn’t seen my brot
her in months. Oh no. He went and got arrested again. What an idiot.
“What did he do n
ow?” I asked waiting to hear about another one of Greg’s adventures.
“My apologies, Ms. Hedon. We brought you in assuming you already knew.”
But I still wasn’t getting it.
“What the fuck is going on?” I slammed my hand on t
he metal desk in frustration. My patience was running low until finally, the detective let it out.
“Ms. Hedon, we found your brother Greg’s remains in a dumpster behind a motel in Atlantic City last night.
“Excuse me?” I said. I must have somehow misunderstood her somehow. I knew what she said but it didn’t quite make sense.
The detective proceeded with caution, assessing my agitation, making sure I didn’t go ape shit on her. “
Aparently, he went unnoticed for a relatively long time. We’re still trying to determine a more accurate time of death. We brought you in today to ask you some routine questions. Maybe you could provide some insight into your brother’s life. We want to make sure whoever did this to your brother gets what they deserve.” But I stopped listening after that.
I stared at Detective Velez without listening to her words. My ears felt muted. Once again my head felt full of pressure and I couldn’t see, hear, or even think.
Someone murdered my brother. I didn’t know who but I’d find out. I knew exactly where to start my search.
Red. I saw only red with vague blackness. My hands began to shake. It was only a slight tremble. But it was enough. M
y head fell back and I blacked out.
To be continued….