All That the Heart Desires (29 page)

“How many cups of coffee have you had already?”

“Don’t ask if you don’t want to know the answer,” was my response and a man and woman who were standing close smiled politely. Daniel looked from Harry to me and back to Harry.

“You taught her well,” he said and we started to laugh. Hearing ‘our’ phrase said by someone else was funny.

“I did, didn’t I,” Harry answered. Daniel turned to me as I put my cup down on the table.

“Will you join me in the garden?” I saw Harry raise his eyebrows but, having a full mouth, he had to stay silent, at least for the time being.

I followed Crest out of the dining room, expecting that we would go out into the garden, but instead of that, Crest opened the front door. I hid my surprise and stepped out. He followed and closed the big door behind us.

He descended the stairs in silence. There were fewer cars parked there than the day before but that was understandable. Some of the guests who lived close by had returned home. Only the team members had slept in the mansion.

I felt awkward but followed him. I didn’t want to be first to continue with the conversation. I wanted to know where it would lead us.

When he realised I was not beside him, he slowed down and waited until I matched his step. I started to feel like I was having my first conversation with my possible ‘father-in-law’ and I’d never had one in my life before. Juan had never introduced me to his family.

Thinking about my past changed the expression on my face to a more serious one.

“Everything alright?” I finally heard him.

“Yes, of course,” I answered. “Why do you ask?”

His expression was unreadable.

“Your face changed,” he explained. “You became…” He didn’t finish his thought.

We walked past the maze, and continued our walk between the trees. Willow branches were gently swaying in the light breeze. I started to catch at them, letting them slip through my hands.

“Where are we going?”

“To the stables.”

I decided to grab the bull by the horns.

“You wanted to talk to me.”

He nodded.

“Yes I did.”

“So?”

“Do you love him?”

Hell, now is everyone going to ask me the same question?

I stopped walking. He carried on walking before noticing that I was no longer beside him; for him, it was a natural question to ask.

“I won’t answer that,” I said.

He nodded.

“You don’t have to. It’s written on your face.” I was relieved to see the stables through the branches. The conversation would hopefully end soon.

“The paparazzi will tear you apart. Are you prepared?” He was direct and harsh. “Are you hiding anything from the world?” He looked me straight in the eyes.

“From the world? No. Just…”

“Good morning!” I was saved by a cheerful Lorcan, who was standing between the open stable doors. I smiled with relief.

“So you’ve come to see Hell’s Feet?”

After Lorcan’s interruption, Crest returned alone to the house with the excuse that he needed to check on the other guests.

The horse Lorcan showed me was a magnificent black thoroughbred, standing at about sixteen and half hands high.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked me, when we were on our way back to the house.

I nodded.

“And you?”

He shook his head.

“No! Knowing how close you are and not having you in my arms made my night a living hell.”

“Are you making fun of me?”

“Why should I be?”

“You had no problems with sleeping on Monday night,” I walked a few steps in front of him.

Suddenly I found myself lifted from behind.

“I wasn’t sleeping alone. I had you in my arms,” he laughed.

He’d known all along. When he put me back down I turned around and faced him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

He shrugged his shoulders.

“Why should I? Seeing you coming into my room was like a dream. I like dreams and by waking up they just end. I didn’t want them to end … Although I knew it wasn’t a dream.”

“I hate you.”

He laughed.

“Just keep on saying that, if you think I’ll believe you.”

As we passed the maze, he increased his pace. I did the same and in the end we were both running. I didn’t run in a straight line, so that made it difficult to catch me right away. We were both laughing.

Only when we heard voices did we turn and realise we had given quite a show to the people standing on the terrace.

When I saw Harry there too, standing with Ursula Crest, a serious look on his face, I knew I couldn’t afford to be too relaxed.

“Let me go,” I whispered to Lorcan. He let me down slowly, but took my hand and walked by my side to the terrace.

“It’s been a long time since we saw you this way,” I heard someone say. Joining the group on the terrace, I slipped my hand out of Lorcan’s and went to join Harry and Ursula. Although my brother looked somewhat annoyed, Ursula smiled at us.

“I must leave for London,” said Harry. “I need to check what’s going on there. Will you…”

“I’ll stay here,” I interrupted him. I’d broken my word and returned to England before I’d found my son. I was not yet ready to go to London. He looked relieved. I think he’d expected that I would want to accompany him.

“Right. I’ll go immediately. I’ll be back here in time for dinner, otherwise I’ll call you.” He kissed me on the cheek. Before he apologised to Ursula, he surprised us both with a question.

“Will your ghost storytellers be available today?”

“No, unfortunately not,” said Ursula. “The boys went on a field trip; actually they went to see their new school.”

Harry looked at me cautiously.

“I see,” he said. “I was looking forward to hearing some ghost stories.” Ursula opened her hands in disappointment.

“I know I promised. I’m sorry.”

I turned around as Harry finally made his apologies, and then he was gone. I watched him walk quickly through the parlour and the entrance hall. As the front door closed behind him, I started to think about the real reason for his leaving. The realisation why he was leaving for London came just as I heard his car drive away. I was too late.

“Bas…” almost slipped out of my mouth, but I sealed my lips before I said something I would regret. After all, I was not alone. Ursula Crest was standing next to me.

“He loves you very much,” I heard her saying. I was angry, as I’d let him play me for a fool. Despite this, I smiled through gritted teeth.

“He’s my rock.”

She took me under my arm and led me back to the house.

“It must have been hard for you, losing your parents at such a young age,” she said when we were alone. I had a hard time not to roll my eyes.

Not you too!
It looked as if she’d decided to interrogate me. She led me through the main parlour across the hallway to the library. The only thing besides shelves full of books in the room was an armchair, a matching sofa and a window seat.

“You should ask Harry. He’s the one who’s done all the work.”

Ursula sat on the sofa.

“Please sit,” she invited me. “No one will interrupt us here.”

I stepped to the window seat and looked out at the oak trees.

“I’ll be direct,” she started.

I turned to face her.

“What are your intentions?”

“I don’t understand you.”

She sighed.

“The boys…”

A knock on the door disturbed us. Lorcan looked in. He’d saved me again. But this time I wasn’t sure I wanted to be saved. Ursula Crest had started the conversation with a subject that was interesting to me, but after Lorcan explained to her that he ‘urgently’ needed me, she let me go.

When I reached the door, I turned around to look at her. She was still sitting there, watching me leave. I didn’t know what to think. Everything was so strange. When she smiled I simply nodded and closed the door behind me.

I’d had enough of people. There were too many of them. For the last three years I’d lived alone with the exception of Anne-Marie, Michelle and Lucille. Now in one weekend I had been thrown together with at least twenty people. I didn’t have a minute for myself; no chance to be alone.

I managed to make my excuses after lunch and escaped to my room. I locked the door behind me. Lorcan was having a short briefing with the rest of the team. I didn’t want to stay alone with Ursula again.as I didn’t know what to think of her.

When the house fell silent and the terrace was empty, I crept through the parlour. After closing the French doors behind me, I ran onto the grass and followed my route to the maze. It was obvious that I was worse than the boys in the sense that I didn’t know how to follow orders either.

Finding the entrance again, I didn’t hesitate and entered the maze. There were two possibilities and I went left. The paths were wide, at least four feet, and the inner walls of the maze were cut with the same precision as the outer ones. Coming around the corner I continued on the path towards the mansion but, as the walls were still the same height, I couldn’t see anything but the upper floor and the roof.

Just before I reached the next corner, a new entrance appeared. I decided to go further. I wondered if I would be able to find the centre of the maze.

The next row was the same width as the one before. Again I had two choices as to what to do and I decided this time to go right. Well, that decision was not quite right as I didn’t get far—I soon found a dead end. I turned back and continued, but it was no use: another dead end.

I sighed as I realised that this walk was going to occupy me for some time. I still knew which direction I’d come from, so I returned to the beginning and tried the other way.

At the beginning it looked like I’d finally found the right route and I wondered why this one was called a maze and not a labyrinth. Until now I hadn’t found anything that was even close to the traps that should have been there.

Walking around the fifth square, I quickly changed my mind. I almost came back to the entrance from the fourth and, instead of a new entrance to the sixth square, all I found were several entrances on the other three walls. I started to feel a little bit lost.

I checked my pocket for my phone to see what the time was and realised I had left it in my room. I hadn’t only lost track of where I was, but also track of time. I tried to find an exit, but it was too late. I couldn’t get out.

At one point I almost crashed into a mirror that suddenly blocked the path, yet was not immediately visible as it reflected the sidewall. Only when I was a few feet away did I see my reflection.

I knew then I had no choice but to go back and find the right path into the next level.

Suddenly I saw it: a small stone bench. I wondered how I hadn’t seen it before. The bench was made of white stone and was big enough for two people at most. My legs were hurting. I didn’t know what the time was. I couldn’t call anyone.

I sat down and leaned on the green wall. The whole time I’d walked around the walls they had looked solid. I was mistaken. Instead of resting my back on the wall, I found myself on the other side, lying on my back on the grass. The part of the green wall I’d fallen through closed shut, leaving no evidence of where it had opened.