Always Enough (18 page)

I looked over at Finn. “Hey, do you think you can go in and spend some time with Mom? I need to go take care of things and I don’t know how long I’ll be.”

“Yeah man, go ahead. I’ll play interference. You better find her though, and I suggest you crawl and beg for her forgiveness. Harper isn’t going to forgive so easily on this one.”

“Call me if you need anything.”

He was right. He got out of the car and walked into the house. I started the car again and made my way over to Michael’s office. This was going to be a load of fun.

Michael’s office was on the other side of town. When I got there, his car was the only one in the parking lot. It was almost midday so I assumed everyone must be out getting lunch. When I walked inside, I saw a desk off to my right with a door right behind it. The sign on the door read “
Michael Brandt
”. I barged in, not even bothering to knock. Michael sat behind a large desk, working on his computer.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” He leaned back in his chair with a surprised expression.

“We need to talk.” I ground out.

“If this is about Harper, you can turn around and get in your fucking car.”

“I want to know what in the hell is going on between the two of you. And I suggest you chose your words carefully, Brandt.”

His nostrils flared and he glared at me from across his desk. “There isn’t a fuckin’ thing going on between us, but that isn’t from my lack of trying. So if you’re here to gloat, I suggest you get out of my office, we have nothing to talk about. She chose you … for now.”

“What do you mean, she chose me? I want to know what in the hell I saw yesterday. You had your damn mouth on my girl. Start talking.”

He glared at me. “The only thing you need to know is that I love her, and that’s not going to stop. So help me, Kyler, if you break her heart, I
will
be there to pick the pieces. I don’t give a shit how you may or may not still feel about her.”

I took a menacing step towards him. “The only heart that’s going to be broken here is yours. She’s
my
girl, and I came here to make it perfectly clear to you that you are never to set foot near her again, understand me? You are not to be within one hundred yards of her, breathing her same air, or contacting her in any way, shape, or form. If it happens, I
will
be making a trip back here to rearrange your face.”

“Whatever, asshole. You’re the one that walked out on her yesterday. If you were dumb enough to believe that she doesn’t want you, then you don’t deserve her.”

My hands curled into fists at my sides. “Watch it, Michael. At this point, I couldn’t give two shits about any friendship we used to have.” I turned to walk out the door. “And you’re right about one thing. I don’t deserve her, but I’ll do everything I can to make her believe that I do.”

I turned and walked out, slamming the door behind me. Holy shit, I’d made a mistake. Harper never wanted Michael—I’d jumped to the wrong conclusion.

I rushed over to her house, but her car wasn’t in the driveway.
Of course she wouldn’t be there, you idiot, she works during the week.
I pulled out my cell phone and dialed her office. The receptionist answered on the first ring.

“Harper Graham Realty, how may I direct your call?”

“Hi, I need to speak with Ms. Graham.” I figured I should make myself sound like a client. What if she’d told them not to speak to me?

“Oh, I’m sorry, sir, she’s going to be out of the office for the next two weeks and can’t be reached. I can direct you to another salesperson if you’d like?”

My stomach dropped. She was gone? For the next two weeks? Where on earth was she?

“Do you have any idea where I can find her? It’s an emergency.”

She sounded skeptical when she said, “Sir, I’m not allowed to give you that information, but as it turns out, she didn’t tell us where she was going. Like I said, I can transfer you to someone else if this is a business related call.”

“Uh, no, that’s okay.” I hung up on her.

I looked at the front of the house and shook my head. She was gone, and nobody knew where she was. My dad was dead, and my girl was gone. Life just went from shit to having absolutely nothing to live for.

Years ago, when I was a kid, my mom took me to a very small town northwest of Mountain Home called Salmon, Idaho. I never forgot how magical it felt. It was a little place surrounded by mountains and natural hot springs. Even as a child, I could appreciate the beautiful pinks and purples that illuminated the mountains when the sun set. I’d never been anywhere that I loved more. As it turned out, my grandmother owned a small cabin on a private lake up there. When she died, instead of leaving it to my mom, she left the property to me. I was only ten years old when I inherited the cabin, but it was something that I treasured. It was also a place that I’d kept secret from everyone—including Emilyn. Nobody else knew about my private oasis except for the lawyer and my mother, and that was only because they’d signed the papers on my behalf.

As soon as I rolled into Salmon, I stopped at the grocery store and bought some essentials to help me make it through the week. When everything was packed up, I made the twenty minute drive up the mountain. When I rounded the corner and saw the cabin in front of the lake, I sighed with relief. I’d been driving for several hours and hadn’t slept since the night before so I was exhausted. First thing on the agenda, unpack groceries. Second thing, sleep.

The cabin was exactly as I’d remembered it. I grabbed all of my bags and went inside. The windows were closed up, and it smelled musty—not to mention it was freezing. Winter was fast approaching, and up here in the mountains I would likely see some snow before I went back home. I put the groceries down and found the bag that held the firelogs and matches. Getting the fire started turned out to be pretty simple. I hadn’t really spent too much time up here during the winter months and I had been slightly nervous that I wouldn’t be able to get the fire going. But I managed fine and mentally patted myself on the back.

After the groceries were unpacked, and new bedding put on the bed, I slid in between the freezing cold sheets and quickly fell asleep, but not before my mind replayed Kyler’s harsh words …
You’re nothing to me.

I was on my way home from my Dad’s funeral. I honestly didn’t know how I’d made it through. I had to hold my mom up several times during the service. During the eulogy she’d wailed so loud that we’d had to escort her into another room so she could calm down. Then, at the gravesite, she started to collapse when they lowered my Dad’s casket into the ground. I’d stayed strong up until that very moment too, but when I threw a clump of dirt on top of the shiny wood, the tears started to stream silently down my face. His death was so final for me in that moment.

Two days had passed since I’d found out that Harper had left. Two days, and nobody knew where she was or where I could find her. I’d visited her office yesterday and practically went postal on her poor office assistant. Ignoring her protests, I went into Harper’s office and searched every desk drawer and file for anything that might tell me where she was, but I came up empty handed.

I left there broken and beaten down. It didn’t help that right after I left, I had to meet Finn and my mom at the funeral home to finish making arrangements. This was officially the lowest point of my life thus far.

People came pouring into the house carrying flower arrangements and food. Why anybody felt it necessary to bring flowers when they’d
die
in a few days anyway always confused me. I made note to throw them away as soon as they all left. Same went for the food. Why bring food, when most people are usually too depressed after the death of their loved one to even think about eating?

All of the guys from the band came to support me and my mom today. Anders, Sonny, and Levi shook my hand and told me how sorry they were. It was Lincoln that shocked me. The normally quiet and broody guy took one look at me and then gave me a bear hug. I stood there, unsure of what to do or how to react, but the guys walked away and gave me some space.

Finn looked over at me. “That was fucking weird, dude.”

I chuckled. “It was, wasn’t it?”

We were both laughing but slowly stopped. We sat in the kitchen watching the people come in and out, each offering their condolences to me and my mom. I was thankful that my mom had her friends to comfort her. I supposed it made me feel good having them around her, when they’d known her and my Dad since high school.

Finn’s phone started to ring. Paris Hilton’s “Turn You On” played and he looked at me. I shrugged my shoulders and he laughed.

“Your Dad just died and yet you still felt the need to change my ringtone?”

“Why fix what isn’t broken, dude?”

He was chuckling when he answered the phone. “Hey, Tiny Girl, how are my girls doing?”

Hearing him talk to Em like that made my heart ache. I really missed Harper, and I couldn’t help but feel like all of this wouldn’t feel so hard if I’d had her hand to hold through the day. She would have given me the strength to deal with all these people, my mom, my own feelings. As Finn spoke, I heard him say something about Harper. I watched him while he listened. He nodded his head, and said a lot of ‘uh-huhs’ and ‘yeahs.’ Eventually, he hung up the phone and looked over at me.

“Spill it, man. I’m already worn thin today.”

He said, “Em told me that Harper has a hidden key under a rock in her flower bed in the backyard. I guess it’s one of those fake rocks. She’s really worried about her and doesn’t like that Harper didn’t tell her where she was going. Em wants you to go to Harper’s and see if you can find anything that might suggest where she’s gone.”

I stood up and started moving for the door. Finn grabbed me by the arm and I stopped to look at him.

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“No, but maybe let Em know that I’m on my way over there, and tell her I’ll give her a call the moment I find something.”

“Alright, man. But … what about your mom?”

I looked over at her as she sat in the living room, surrounded by her friends.

“I think she’ll be okay for right now. Just go hang with the guys and I’ll let you know what’s up.”

What would normally have been a ten-minute drive took me half the time. When I got to Harper’s place, I went around back and found the rock that the key was under.
How did I not know that she had a hidden key?

When I unlocked her front door, I walked in and went straight to her bedroom. The smell almost brought me to my knees—it smelled just like her. Being surround by her things and her space, my chest ached. I didn’t know where to start.

There were clothes strewn across the made bed. I walked into the bathroom and noticed a few things missing. Her toothbrush was gone, the perfume she normally wore wasn’t in its usual place, and her bathrobe was missing from the back of the door. I didn’t think I’d find anything in there so I went to the nightstand by the bed. Not surprisingly, there was a vibrator—at least she hadn’t taken that, I thought. There were little things like a pen, notepaper, a romance novel, and an old watch.