Always (Family Justice Book 1) (55 page)

More tears threatened. “Don’t be upset with me. I love you so much and I love this baby so much. It’s just that…” She had to stop and pull it together. After a couple of quick breaths, she gave up and let the tears fall. “I’m just so damn tired.”

Drae was tap dancing on the head of a pin. Was she all right or wasn’t she? Was this just another hormonal blow-out? It was hard to tell. She did, however, look exhausted. Plus, it was getting awfully close to their due date. But maybe all this was normal. He had no fucking idea.

“You know what? Desi has already left—Sawyer scheduled an early flight so she could have time with the kids. How about we just lay around today, hm
mmm
? Maybe all the excitement yesterday was just too much. That’s a possibility, right?”

She nodded and slumped against him. Good. That was settled. Picking her up, he marched right back into their bedroom, sat her gently on the side of the bed, and quickly constructed a pillow chair that she could lounge on. It just took a few minutes to get her situated and comfortable, the remote control in her hand, and the entertainment armoire open and fired up. Music, TV, movies—whatever she wanted. It was all available.

Trying to keep things light so he had a better chance of really assessing what was going on, he asked, “Tea, toast, and what else for breakfast?

“HELL’S BELLS, MOM! YOU LOOK amazing,” Tori exclaimed with a wide smile lighting up her face.

Stephanie had stopped by the master bedroom on her way to dinner with Calder because she was nervous as shit and wanted some feedback from her daughter.

The thought made her smile.
Imagine
. Asking for dating advice from one’s grown child.

“Uh,” Drae mumbled. “Yeah. Um…maybe I’ll just go and maybe make some dinner? You know. So you two can talk.”

She’d never heard the normally cool and confident man sound so weirded out. Yeah, she knew. It
was
weird. Mother-in-law dating boss’ uncle. Like that happened every day. He looked like he wanted to jump and couldn’t get out of the room fast enough.

Tori started snorting with laughter once he was out of earshot. “Mom!” she cried happily. “This is so awesome. Like, if you marry Calder,” Stephanie went wide eyed as Tori positively vibrated with glee, “then that would make Draegyn somehow related to Alex. I mean come on! What could be better than that?”

Oh, my dear, sweet baby Jesus
, she thought. It was just a date. Not a commitment ceremony. Should be no big deal, as in N-B-D.

But truth was, she’d felt like a nervous teen getting ready for a big date, trying on and discarding half a dozen outfits before finding one she liked. And now Tori was all but making the seating arrangements for a family wedding. Anxiety began churning in her gut.

Maybe she should cancel. After all, what were they actually doing? Was a relationship with Calder even a possibility? Lord, she was frustrated. Out of her emotional comfort zone. Afraid of making a mistake. Worried she’d regret it if she walked away.

Tori must have picked up on her inner turmoil ‘cause she reached out, snagged her by the hand, and tugged. “Mom, come on. You don’t have to be nervous. Calder is a great guy. Do you really think the Major would let him anywhere near you if he wasn’t the real deal?”

Whoooooa.
Stephanie hadn’t thought of it that way. Not really. She agreed with Calder that Alex and Meghan were matchmaking, but until just now, all of that seemed like a silly, benign one-off. But it was deeper than that. Tori was right. The honorable man she knew and trusted would never do anything questionable where she was concerned.

“Why does everyone just automatically assume that Calder and I should be together? What is that all about?”

Well, that pithy comment certainly earned her the raised eyebrow and scowl she got.

“Really?” Tori drawled sarcastically. “You can’t think of
any
reason why?” Throwing up her hands, she made a sound of exasperation, reached for something on the nightstand, and then handed a small object. A mirror.

“Need a reason why? One of them is in that mirror. Take a look, Mom. You’re a grown-up, yes—but you’re young, beautiful, stylish, easy to be around. It probably mystifies people why there isn’t a flock of drooling men chasing after you.”

She snatched the mirror back and tossed it aside. “And then there’s Calder.” Tori shrugged. “To me, he’s a lot like Alex. May not look it but I suppose because I’ve worked with both of them, I see the similarities. I think he’s genuine, and I think you can trust him. He isn’t blind, Mom. He sees who you are
and
he knows Draegyn from way back, who I might add would also be butting in if he thought Calder was a dick.”

Well, damn. She was right about that, too. Any reservations she kept finding to shut Calder down were being picked off one by one.

“So, do I look alright,
shugah
? Not too much?”

“Oh God, Mom. No.
Seriously.
You look amazing.” Tori slumped against the bed pillows as if all the energy in her drained away.

“Sweetie. What’s the matter?”

“Oh, it’s nothing. Tired. Hungry. The usual,” she muttered. “Need to nibble on something and maybe have a TV nap. You know how I love to sleep through
Entertainment Tonight
.”

Stephanie’s phone chirped. It was Calder. He’d be out front in five minutes.

She stepped up to the bed and gave Tori a big kiss and as much of a side hug as their positions would allow. “Five-minute warning,” she said drily.

Tori pushed her away with a comical grunt and hooted, “Mom! Stop messing around. Go bag the hot surfer guy.”

“See you later,
shugah
,” Stephanie drawled, grabbing her bag off the chair and heading for the door.

“We won’t wait up!” Tori hollered. The next thing she heard was more laughter.

The evening certainly was starting out well.

“NO. PEEPAW IS NOT A word. Nice try.”

“Sure it is,” Drae assured his wife with a sincere headshake. “
You
know. Peepaw?”

When she blank stared him, he bit back a grin. “What? No?”

The hair curling around her shoulders fluttered back and forth as she shook her head with a flat, deadpanned expression.

They were playing Scrabble spread out in the center of the giant playpen they’d constructed for their day in bed. Victoria was leaning against the headboard, a fluffy pillow or two at her back, and he was half-reclining on his side with his head down near her feet. The game sat on its box so the spinning board moved easily.

He rearranged his letters and studied the board. Not for the first time he thought about the advantage his wife had in these sorts of games.

Shuffling some of his tiles, he absently murmured,” Not fair you know. Making me play this game with you. Sucks being married to a woman with a PhD. in Smarty-Pants.”

She smacked his arm with her foot. “Sucks does it? Fuck you!”

He laughed and grabbed it before she could draw the foot back, which got her instantly squealing. She hated being tickled. It drove her bat-shit crazy.

“No! No!” she screamed, giggling between squeals.

Without warning, Drae raised her foot and started kissing and tonguing her toes.

“Suck and Fuck,” he laughed when he saw her eyes light up. “I’ll add that to the honeymoon bucket list.”

She smiled at him, as she had done all day. But that smile was vacant and practiced. Also as it had been all day. She was working overtime trying to manage his anxiety, and he was dancing on the head of a pin trying to read her condition, minute-by-minute.

“I’m bored,” she said sullenly. “Maybe I should get up and move around. I think lying around starts to make me crazy.”

Why the fuck couldn’t he do more to help her with this burden? She was making a baby with her body and all he could do was stand by. A feeling of useless, helplessness was battering his nerves. This little woman, who loved so fiercely and who seemed like she’d been pregnant for a year, was a hundred times stronger than he would be in her situation.

They walked slowly, his arm securely around her bumped out waist, and made their way to the nursery. It was after all, her favorite destination. Plus, spending time in the room seemed to always make her feel better.

“Oh look, honey,” she said pointing at a new lamp that had the pale greens and purples as the rest of the room. “Betty gave us that at the shower. Isn’t it sweet?”

Before Drae could answer, he felt her shift heavily against him and stiffen. She mumbled, “Oh my,” then reached out a hand and just like that slithered to the floor in a sort of mind-numbing slow motion.

Somewhere inside him, the screaming started…

“HEY—GOOD NEWS,” ALEX ANNOUNCED when Meghan shifted again.

They were relaxing in the family room, sitting side by side on the enormous sofa, and he’d been noting for the past twenty minutes or so how restless and antsy she seemed.

Trying to take her mind off whatever was causing the edginess, he launched into a detailed account of what was happening with the yoga studio.

“Now that the slab for the adobe modular has been poured, we’re good to go. If they keep to their schedule, you’ll have a brand new yoga dojo to set up real soon.”

“Oh. Great.”

Click, click, click…she was scrolling through the TV channels in about an absent a fashion as that mumbled answer was.

Alex sighed and tossed his iPad onto the coffee table. Made him crazy when she was like this. Distracted. Vague. Wasn’t like her at all.

“Come here,” he gestured, patting his thigh. “Come tell Daddy what’s wrong.”

He knew she’d groan at his use of the term
Daddy
so he was prepared to bite back the grin he felt aiming for his face. She threw the remote control down and quickly scooted onto his lap.

With an arm draped about his neck, she leaned into him for a gentle hug. “I’ve got Daddy issues enough as it is,” she pointed out, chuckling. “So there is no way I’m calling you that.
Fuhgeddaboudit
!”

Good. He got her laughing immediately.

“Tell me what’s up, beautiful. I’ve been watching you,” he said.

Wrapping some of her long curls around his fingers, he gave a teasing yank. “You’ve been through the entire channel guide half a dozen times, clicked past the History Channel twice without stopping, even though there was one of those documentaries on that you like so much. All signs of your head not being in the game. Time to share, baby.”

“I’m distracted, I know,” she admitted with a slight shrug.

“And?”

Meghan laid her forehead against his. When she spoke he inhaled her words. “Ever just have that gnawing feeling that something isn’t quite right?”

Fuck.
Who didn’t? “Yeah. All the time during the war. Not so much now.”

Alex rubbed his hand reassuringly up and down her back, offering comfort. “Maybe it’s just a letdown after the weeks of activity leading up to the holiday.”

“I hope that’s all it is.
Really
,” she snorted humorously. “Don’t need any more on my plate right now.”

The phone chose that moment to go off with a ringtone easily identifying for him that it was one of his brothers. “Better get that,” he mumbled while fishing under her legs and into his pocket.