Amazon Challenge (15 page)

Authors: Robin Roseau

I didn't say another word. I stepped to my sister and asked, "Where are my clothes?"

She pointed. They were piled on one of the tables.

With continued laughter following me, I collected my clothes and walked slowly and proudly to my hut.

Music

I got dressed slowly, pulling on traveling clothes. I heard the Amazons set and light a bonfire, but I didn't hear any entertainment beginning. I fumed in the hut for a while, and everyone left me alone. I finally came to a decision and turned towards the exit, intending to head to the stables, saddle my horse, and head home.

I wasn't sure if "home" meant Queen's Town or Gallen's Cove. I wasn't sure how soon I would have made that decision.

But just then, Malora entered the hut. Seeing me, she couldn't help but grin.

"Laugh it up," I said. "Enjoy the view, because it's the last you're getting for a while."

"Don't be like that."

"I promised to be as gracious as you would be," I said. "I'm pretty sure right about now you would be trouncing her on the practice grounds. As I am incapable of that solution, what do you recommend I do instead?"

"Please keep your voice down. I know you want to scream right now, but it will be easier for you if you decide to calm down if you don't make a scene in here for everyone to hear."

"Did you enjoy the joke, Malora?"

"It's temporary, Maya. Any reaction you make has far greater duration than what she has done."

"She did this at the beginning of our trip, meaning every single Amazon is going to see me like this, unless it washes off faster than I believe it will. As if I needed help being the Amazon laughingstock. And it's not even a real punishment. It was a prank, one you ordered me to accept."

"You're the one who refused her judgment."

"Don't give me that! She was going to continue to push until I did something bad enough she could justify this. And you let her. I'm going home. Get out of my way."

She didn't move but stood there, leaning against the doorway, watching me.

"I mean it, Malora. Get out of my way."

"Maya," she said, "you have two basic choices. You can respond graciously or you can respond ungraciously. One of these choices has a far better outcome for everyone, including yourself, than the other."

"Meena was part of it," I replied. "From the beginning."

"I'm sure she was."

"Why?" I asked. "What did I do they hate me this much? Am I that horrible a person they need to humiliate me to put me in my place?"

"Oh Maya," she said, "No. They're your friends."

"Oh please. I think that has been clearly demonstrated to be false."

"Maya, listen to me. Please, just listen. What we do here, what the Amazons do here, is a drain on all of us. Surely you've seen that."

"So why would they make it worse for me?" I asked. "Don't I do enough? I am companion to everyone who needs one! What more do all of you expect from me?"

"Wait, just let me finish," she said. "We need laughter. We need levity. You're really good at teasing people-"

"But I never take it remotely this far, and if I think someone is getting upset, I stop."

"Let me finish!"

"Fine," I said, crossing my arms.

"This village is still short on companions. Meena is working hard to fill the gap, as are one or two other companions, but none of them are you. I don't know what it is, but you are more soothing when handling three or four
warriors than most companions are when focused entirely on a single warrior."

"Well, you're on the edge of losing that!"

"Just wait, Maya." She took a breath, blew it out. "We need laughter, we all need laughter. You gave everyone out there the best laugh they've had in months. Nerves here are ragged, and there have been fights. Loren would never have whipped you for a few plants, but she's had to whip a few of the warriors for fighting. That tends to put significant strain on a village, and the two warriors are probably about to ask me for permission to relocate. But I am going to have to tell them 'no' because this village can't afford to lose them. My only other choice is to relocate some of our warriors here. Whom do you want me to send?"

"Do not put this on me!"

"I'm not. I don't want to send anyone, either. They are our closest friends. I need Nori, Ralla and Balorie. I don't think we want to give up our cook, so that means I can't send Ping either. So that leaves warriors you call friends, or whose companions you call friends. And so I'm going to say 'no' when the warriors here ask to relocate, unless they can find someone to trade with them."

"Get to your point."

"You gave them a real good laugh, the entire village-"

"And you, Nori, Omie, and my sister."

"Yes, I admit. We laughed, but it was nervous laughter, unsure how you were going to respond."

"Not Beria's."

"She's young. If you want to discuss that later, we can. It's a side issue."

"Fine."

"They are still out there chuckling, and if you can go out there and be gracious, there will be more laughter, probably all night. And you, by being gracious, will do more good for this village than I could ever do. Or you can respond badly, and the village will probably fracture. I can't afford that, Maya."

"Did you know all this before we got here?"

"I knew they were struggling. I figured out Loren was setting you up, but not until I caught her watching you so carefully at the garden. She waited until you had done as much damage as you were going to, and I saw her disappointment when it wasn't worse."

"And the rest?"

"Not the specifics, but I figured it would be something funny. I only hoped you wouldn't be too upset. Why do you think I begged you to be gracious?"

"I am getting real tired of Amazons volunteering me to fix their problems for them," I told her. "Why can't anyone just ask me?"

"You made such a joke of your pink hair, I think she thought you'd find it funny."

"You gave me a chance to get used to the idea and didn't have me parading around naked in front of everyone, bright purple."

"It's not that bright."

"Do not make this into a joke!"

"Sorry," she said.

"You still haven't answered my question. Why do I keep getting forced to solve your problems instead of being asked?"

"My problems? They're not our problems? Maya?" Her voice was full of concern.

"They weren't my problems when I was kidnapped from Gallen's Cove, and right now I'm not in a mood to claim them. Do you want to play semantics on that or answer my question?"

"I think because Loren is probably on the edge as much as anyone here, Maya. But I am asking you now. We-" and she stressed that word, "have a significant morale problem, and I could really, really use your help alleviating it."

"You're right we have a mora
le problem," I admitted. "Mine. I suppose you're going to tell me I have to continue on this tour with you, too, that this 'morale issue' is spread throughout the entire forest."

"Yes."

I turned my back on her. "I think you're making this shit up so I don't go out there and do something that can't be undone. Like, I don't know, challenge Loren to a death match for leadership of this village."

"At least you can joke."

I turned around. "I'm not joking."

"Please, Maya. I need your help."

"Why is it always me? Why not go find someone who enjoys playing the clown? Or pick on someone else for a while."

"Why you? All right," she said. "You're the queen's companion. That makes you a target. I'm sorry, but it does. Why not ask you first?
Because it wouldn't have been half as funny. It wouldn't have done half as much good if you had played a willing part. It's funny because it's a prank, and because it's about the most extreme prank someone could play that doesn't make everyone think it was cruel. Why not someone else? Who?"

"You."

"Two reasons. First this is as much a joke on me as it is on you."

"Oh, I don't think so."

"All right, but Loren was watching my reaction, and I could see her grinning. At me, not you."

"So I'm the horse Nori once dyed?"

"Don't carry that analogy too far," Malora said, "but yes."

"Second reason?"

"Because we both know I wouldn't respond at all well."

"So I am supposed to be far more gracious than you would be."

"Yes."

"Fine. Nori. Loren herself.
Loren's own companion. I don't care. Why is it always me?"

"It's not always you. Nori takes her share of jokes-"

"The worst I've seen are stories."

"I admit
, most of the attention has shifted to you. Do you want to volunteer some of the companions? Maybe Beria?"

"Damn it, Malora!"

"I'm fighting with words, Maya," she said.

I turned around, still fuming. Malora let me think about it for a minute then I heard her approaching. I didn't flinch when she set her arms on my shoulders.

"I need your help, Maya," she said softly.

"I think you're making all that crap up."

"I'm not. Count the companions out there. And they're down to nine warriors."

I thought about it. "Th
ey can't be." I turned around. "There were... Um. Sixteen of us for dinner. With four on patrol-"

"No one on patrol. Black Oak and Deep Circle are covering their patrol tonight. Loren will send out a patrol in the morning." Black Oak was the village we'd passed through around lunchtime, and Deep Circle was one village further north. "I really should be sending them one or two of our warriors."

"Damn it, Malora-"

"Consider this. Let's say that I'm lying to you just to calm you down. You go out there, you're gracious,
you take some more laughter, plus additional laughter in the other villages. What happens?"

I didn't have an answer.

"Now, if you go out there and make a scene, or if you just return to Queen's Town, what happens?"

I sighed. "I hate you."

"No you don't."

"Fine. I'm going to go play nice, but as far as I'm concerned, this village and everyone in it lost a friend, and I am not returning here.
I will pretend I don't feel deeply betrayed and humiliated, but you and I know the truth."

Then I pulled away and walked to the door, took a deep breath, and then plastered a fake smile on my face. Malora tried to catch up to me, but I pulled away from her again, stepping out of the hut.

I hurried towards the fire, making sure everyone heard me. They grew still, and I slowed as I approached, allowing Malora to catch up to me. As soon as she touched me, I said loudly, "Wow, Malora! If I had known how horny you get from a little purple skin, I'd have asked Loren to do this to me years ago."

Everyone laughed, of course, although I saw Nori watching me, and I thought she knew me well enough to know I was putting on an act.

I pulled away from Malora and added, "You should be satiated for at least a few minutes, Malora. Go sit over there." I pointed to one side of the fire while I headed for the other, taking a seat on the ground.

There was more laughter, and Malora took some ribbing.

I looked around and found Beria sitting next to Omie, Omie's arm around my sister's shoulder. I pointed at her. "You. Sister. Beer."

I could tell she was about to tell me to get it myself, but Omie whispered something to Beria, and my sister got up, heading for the kitchens.

From around me, I continued to hear laughter. It was meant to be good-natured, but I was still angry, and I did what I could to ignore it.

Beria returned with my beer. I thanked her for it. She sat down next to me.

"Are you okay?" she asked quietly.

"Of course," I said. "Why do you ask?"

"I'm sorry I laughed."

"Don't lie to me, Beria," I told her. I pulled her head to mine and kissed the top. "I love you, Sister." And then I buried my face in her head and took several deep breaths, trying very hard not to cry. I pushed her away and said, "Go on, your warrior looks like she misses you."

"I want to talk to you about something," she said instead.

"Birds and the bees?"

"Yeah."

"She's older than you."

"Malora is a LOT older than you."

"I know. It doesn't seem as much to me at my age than the difference between you and Omie does right now."

"I love her."

"I know. Have you-"

"No. She won't."

"I was going to ask if you've kissed."

"Not the way you mean. Does it hurt? I heard that it hurts, the first time."

"Mine didn't," I replied. "Malora was very gentle and very, very good to me."