America's Bravest (62 page)

“Oh, that’s nice.”

“What?”

“Your smile. It’s reassuring. I’m nervous.”
She was wringing her hands. “It’s been…it’s been…” Turning her
head, she looked away.

Something dawned on him. Oh, dear Lord, could
that possibly be true? Stepping close, he placed his hands on her
shoulders. He needed to know. “It’s been a long time for me,
Parker.”

Her eyes were dark amethysts tonight and
stared up at him.

“You, too?”

She nodded.

“How long?”

She drew in a heavy breath. Let it out.
“Since October third, two-thousand-one.”

“Oh, honey.” He brushed her cheek with his
knuckles. “I’m so sorry. And pleased you want to do this with
me.”

“Can we go slow?”

“Of course. We can do anything you want.”

A relieved sigh.

Lifting her chin, he brushed his lips over
hers with exquisite care, promising himself he’d do this right, no
matter what his body screamed at him.

She fell into the kiss in stages. At first,
she kept a space between them. Then she sidled in closer. He let
his arms go loosely around her. Still the kiss went on, and she put
more oomph into it. He responded but kept control. Need rampaged
through him, but it didn’t matter. When she looped her arms around
his neck and totally gave herself to the embrace, he knew she’d
stopped thinking about another time and another place and was only
with him.

Drawing back, he smiled again, kissed her
forehead and led her to the bed. She stopped next to it, peering up
at him again.

“How do you want to do this, love?”

“Can we undress ourselves?”

“Like I said, we can do anything you want.”
He raised his hands to the nape of his shirt to pull it off.

“Can I watch you first?”

“Oh, darlin’.”

Slowly, he slipped the tee over his head. He
felt totally self-conscious: he was a forty-five-year-old
grandfather, for God’s sake, and a well-respected firefighter
playing a Chippendale in her bedroom. But he did it anyway. She
smiled when he lost his shirt. She stared at his hand when it went
to his middle. Undid his belt. Might as well get this over with. He
dropped both his navy blue briefs and shorts, kicked off his shoes
and stood before her. Totally exposed, with a granite-hard
erection, he said, “So, what do you think?”

“I think you’re beautiful.”

“Thank you.”

Standing there, she sighed.

“Need some help?”

“No, not this time.” Slowly, she eased off
her flowery pajama bottoms. He couldn’t look at what they revealed,
yet. Then she bit her lip. “Can I leave my top on?”

“Of course. Though I’ve seen the scars and
they don’t turn me off.”

“They turn
me
off.”

“Do whatever you like, but know this Parker
Allen, you are one gorgeous hunk of woman.”

She grinned this time, as he meant her to.
“With a feminist objection to the phrase, thanks for the
compliment.”

He moved closer to her. Sliding his arms
around her, he cupped her bare bottom and inhaled the scent of
lotion and shampoo he’d forever associate with this moment.

Dear God in heaven,
he prayed,
please let me last, let me make this good for her.

oOo

His hands felt good on her. She laid next to
him, facing him, touching his chest while he ran his calloused
palms over her arms, his knuckles down her cheek, his fingers into
her hair. She shivered at his light touch. Tipping her chin, she
asked for a kiss and got it. Man, he was a good kisser. He made her
belly tighten and her thighs ache with the insistent brush of his
lips against hers. Already she felt herself go moist and it
was…wonderful. His arm slid around her—she didn’t realize how much
bigger he was than her until now—and drew her closer. Her legs
entangled with his. The feel of them, and his chest sprinkled with
hair, were so male her insides went liquid. Even when his hand went
under her shirt, to her back, she didn’t startle.

“I need to touch you more.” His voice was
gravelly, hoarse with desire.

“Please, do it.”

His hand traveled lower. Brushed her mound in
slow lazy circles. Gently he parted her thighs. Wonderful fingers
massaged her, opened her and slipped into her.

She came like a burst of summer rain, slowly
falling and warming every fiber of her. The pleasure was so
intense, she lost consciousness for a moment.

When she came to, she saw him next to her:
his elbow crooked, his head resting on his hand, staring down at
her. “That was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my
life.”

“It was wonderful. Gentle. Sweet. Just what I
needed.”

He grinned. Leaned over. “There’s more where
that came from, love.”

oOo

She wanted him and he was pulsing with need.
“Come inside me, Cal.”

Thank God. “Condoms.” He reached over to the
floor, grabbed his shorts, extricated them. “Fuck, I only have
two.”

She laughed out loud.

He slid one on, then whispered, “Look at me,
Parker.”

Her gaze was so wide, so innocent, it gave
him strength. He entered her slowly. Man, she was so tight, he was
afraid he might come right away. He counted, he thought of world
peace, of everything but her, until finally he was fully inside
her.

Impishly, she whispered, “You, um, could
move.”

Taking in a breath, he pushed. Once, twice,
and then he felt her spasms. His body reacted with harder pushes,
thrusts, and when he heard her call out “Oh, God, yes,” he let go.
His last conscious thought was he couldn’t control his body any
longer, and he prayed he didn’t hurt her.

She was watching him when he opened his eyes.
They were lying on their sides, their bodies still joined. Her
violet eyes shining like gems, she looked wanton with her hair in
tangles from his hands, a blush on her cheeks and a big fat smile
on her face.
Thank you, God.

“That was wonderful,” she said, caressing his
jaw. It was scratchy. He hadn’t shaved because he never expected
something like this to happen. He’d kept the condoms in his wallet
for a long time.

He leaned into her touch. “I’m glad. For me,
too.”

“You spent much of it holding back.”

“Some. And certainly not at the end. I didn’t
hurt you, did I?”

“No, not at all.”

He noticed the tank top she’d left on to hide
her scars. “Everything okay?”

“I never felt better in my life.” But she
yawned.

“Sleepy?”

“Yeah, I can’t believe it.” She nestled into
his chest.

Smiling at a memory of that night she spent
at the firehouse, of him thinking that he knew how he could get her
to sleep, he pulled her to his chest, next to his heart, reached
over her to turn off the light and drew up the sheet.

“Before she dozed off, she said, “Cal, will
you tell me about what happened to you on 9/11 soon?”

“All right, sweetheart. I will. Soon.”

His eyes closed as soon as he felt her even
breathing.

As she drove to the firehouse in the bright
sunshine, joy bubbled out of Parker; she was happier than she ever
thought she’d be again after the devastating events of her past.
Making love with Cal had been a real turning point in her life and
she was looking forward to the future. He’d left her bed at dawn so
he could get to the station on time, and now she’d see him again.
She herself was later than usual, but she’d fussed with her
appearance, fluffing her hair, putting on a peach sundress and
flirty sandals.

As she walked through the once-again ajar
door of the building and headed down the corridor, the familiar
sights and scents of a firehouse surrounded her: the pervasive odor
of smoke, the aroma of coffee and the picture of the homey kitchen
as she reached it.

“Snyder was suspended?” Sydney asked.

Snyder
, she thought.

“Yeah.” This from Gabe, his tone glacial.
“Apparently Callahan’s been keeping a file on him. They’ve got him
on sexual harassment, insubordination and a few other things.”

Felicia snorted. “Couldn’t happen to a nicer
guy.”

O’Malley noticed Parker first and frowned.
“Hi, Ms. Allen.”

Everybody shut up.

She realized she was the still an interloper,
though she didn’t feel like one anymore. Maybe that could change.
She’d sent today’s blog to Cal last night, but she didn’t put it up
this morning, so perhaps this was a new beginning. “Before you go
any further, I won’t write about what I overheard.”

Coming in close to the table, she stood
before the five men and women she’d begun to care about. “In fact,
I’m retiring my blog.”

“Why?” Felicia asked suspiciously.

“Let’s just say this experiment worked in
your favor.” She waved to encompass the house. “In any case, my
visit today will be my last.” She couldn’t wait to tell Cal and get
this obstacle out of their way.

Sydney smiled generously at her. “Thank you,
Parker. We, um, didn’t expect you today, though. The chief told us
you wouldn’t be in until tomorrow.”

“Oh.” Geez, she was completely distracted to
have forgotten when the next visit would be. “Then I won’t stay. Is
Cal in?”

“I don’t know,” Gabe told her. “He has a
meeting with the mayor. Want me to check his office?”

“No, I will. If he’s not there, I’ll leave a
message and go out the side door.” Again she smiled.

After good-byes, and “Hope to see you” from
most of them, Parker headed down the hall to find Cal. She wanted
to whistle, to tap dance at the thought of being with him again,
watching his green eyes sparkle, his face soften and his sculpted
mouth turn up at the sight of her.

From the end of the corridor, she saw a man
enter the side door and go right into Cal’s office—Mayor Bob
Johnson. She hadn’t voted for the guy, and after she’d started the
blog, she’d had some testy calls from him. Deciding to wait outside
for Cal, she walked forward and, as she neared the door, still open
a crack, she heard, “Congratulations, my man. You’ve done a good
job controlling the prickly Ms. Allen.”

Parker froze.

Cal said, “You misunderstand the situation,
Mayor.”

“What’s to misunderstand? She called Noah
this morning and told him she wasn’t going to be blogging about the
fire department anymore. That she learned how wrong she’d been from
hanging out with the squad.”

“I didn’t know that.” His voice was gruff,
like it had been last night. “Still, I didn’t have anything to do
with the decision.”

Oh, God, if only that were true.
Parker had to lean against the wall to keep herself upright.

“All
I
know is I asked you to
sweet-talk her into getting off our backs and she did. I gotta say
that’ll go a long way in snagging you the promotion to deputy
chief.”

He was up for deputy chief? Was all this
why…?

Her stomach roiled.

Her head began to swim.

Suddenly, she couldn’t breathe.

Forcing herself to move, she inched forward a
few steps and then she began running. She made it out the side door
and to her car. Where behind it, she lost the contents of her
stomach. Afterward came the horrific realization: she’d been had,
in more ways than one.

Taking a deep breath, she tried to steady
herself like she had that awful day ten years ago. Because right
now, Parker felt equally beaten up.

oOo

“Listen, Mayor, you have this all wrong. I
haven’t sweet-talked Parker Allen. But obviously, she’s convinced
we do a good job and deserve our pay and benefits. Can’t we leave
it at that?”

The man’s face held a knowing,
male
grin. “We can leave it any way you want, Erikson. But you’re
getting credit.”

He didn’t want credit. He wanted
her
. Everything was happening so fast, his mind reeled.
Last night. The news that she was giving up the blog. She must have
called Noah after Cal left her this morning.

Finally Johnson said good-bye and Cal dropped
down at his desk. His first impulse was to tell Parker what the
mayor thought. But their relationship was so fragile, he was afraid
she might bolt. Yet if he didn’t and she found out, the result
would be disastrous. There was a knock on the door, then Gabe
entered.

“Hey, Chief. I saw the big guy leave.”

“Yeah.”

“Did Parker tell you her news?”

“Parker? No, but the mayor filled me in about
the blog.”

Gabe was smiling. “She came in the side
entrance and down to the kitchen. She was on her way in here to
talk to you. She thought she was supposed to ride along with us
today.”

Oh, God, no. “I didn’t see her.” But what did
she see? Hear? His hands began to shake, his stomach got queasy
like he’d gulped in smoke.

“Anyway, she’s out of our hair. Although she
seems like a good person underneath all the bravado.”

“Yeah, she is.”

“Cal, are you okay?”

He shook his head as the pieces of the
picture fell into place. “No, Gabe, I’m not. Look, I’ve got to go
out. It’s an emergency. Can you handle Incident Command if we get a
call?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Great.” He stood. “See you later.”

Cal left the firehouse with undiluted dread
accompanying him. Jesus Christ, if Parker had overheard the mayor,
how was Cal going to explain himself?

oOo

Parker was numb, but not too numb to make a
phone call. One she thought she’d never make again. Now, she waited
at her house for him and thought of Cal—and his betrayal.

Congratulations, my man. You’ve done a
good job controlling Allen.

I asked you to sweet-talk her into
getting off our backs.

This’ll go a long way in snagging you the
promotion to deputy chief.

How could she possibly have been so stupid?
She’d thought that Cal cared about her. He’d made love to her like
a tender suitor. Looked like he took the
sweet talk
a
little too far. How could he have done that to her?