Amy (Aces MC Series Book 3.5) (2 page)

"No she hasn't woken up yet Duke...I'll call you as
soon as she does."
Something was different this time, I wasn't in a dream like state and I could
feel the pain in my stomach and my head was throbbing.
"I need something for the pain Diesel." I hadn't yet opened my eyes
but I knew it was Diesel in my room from the conversation I'd heard.
"Fucking hell Amy you gave me a fright, you gave us all a fucking
fright." I heard the buzzing of the alarm beside the bed as Diesel alerted
the nurse's station. "How you feeling?"
"Like I've been stabbed!" I said dryly.
Diesel chuckled, "That's my Ames." He leaned over and placed a kiss
on my forehead as I heard the door to my room open.

"Good afternoon Miss Stokes, I'm Megan and I'll be
looking after you. Can you tell me if you're in any pain?"
I pointed to my stomach and then my head still unable to open my eyes.
"The brightness is hurting my eyes, are you able to shut the blinds or
turn off the lights?"
"Yeah sure." Diesel busied himself around the room doing what I'd
asked in order to make me more comfortable. This is how he coped with things,
he would now spend every waking hour trying to make sure that I was oaky by
fussing around me. He was a pleaser not in the same league as Spike but we'd
all been brought up with morals and looked after the people we cared for.

"I'll increase the morphine and then take your
temperature."
I smiled at the nurse as she busied herself around the room tending to me and
briefly caught Diesel's eye. He pursed his lips tightly and smiled but it
didn't meet his eyes, he had something on his mind and I knew I'd have to wait
until the nurse had left before he would open up.
Megan went about her business but I was slowly losing patience and needed her
out of here.
"Are you now comfortable Miss Stokes?" she asked pleasantly.
"I'm fine thank you Megan, I'll call should I need anything." I said
dismissing her. Megan looked between Diesel and I, and could obviously feel the
mounting tension by the way her eyes widened before scampering from the room
taking all of the equipment with her.

"What is it Diesel, you're worrying me?" I asked
concerned by the way he was staring at me.
He unfolded his arms and pushed from the wall to make his way beside me, to perch
himself on the leather chair. "Did you know that you were pregnant?"
His words quickened my heartbeat and I immediately placed my hand on my
bandaged stomach. My head swelled with information as I tried to process what
he'd just said. My period had been late, in fact I hadn't had one for two
months but I'd put that down to stress. I had also become unwell lately and had
struggled to eat certain foods, oh my god could I possibly be pregnant? I
looked between my heavily wrapped stomach and back at Diesel and saw the
sadness in his eyes.
Did that mean that I wasn't pregnant anymore?

The tears automatically trickled down my cheeks as I fanned
my fingers over my tummy holding it protectively. Diesel moved from the chair
and sat on the edge of the bed as he pulled me into his embrace, holding me
close to his chest as I mourned the loss that was my baby. I hadn't ever had
any real thoughts of becoming a mother but wasn't it every girls dream to have
a baby? I sobbed for what may have been. I didn't care that I hadn't known I
was pregnant, this was raw emotion I couldn't help how I was feeling.

"I'm sorry to be the one to tell you Amy, I really
am." Diesel loosened his hold on me and held me at arm's length so he
could look directly into my eyes.
I smiled slightly trying to let him know that I was feeling a little better. I
wasn't, I was fucking crushed inside but although Diesel was my brother, he was
a man and they didn't do crying women too well.
I let out a sigh, "Does Recon know?" I asked and remembered hearing a
conversation when I was semi conscious that took place between Spike and
Diesel.
"No, I didn't think it was my place to tell him Ames. I wanted to break
the news to you first and you can then do with the information as you see
fit."
"Thank you," I said placing my hand onto his lower arm.
He looked at me confused, "For what?"
"Family values."
Diesel scoffed, "You're my priority Amy over everyone. It's you, me and
Spike against the world remember?" I sniggered at his comment. When we
were younger we used to parade around like the three musketeers causing havoc
until they realised I had breasts and was different to them. "Recon's my club
brother but you're blood Ames and this situation needed to be handled correctly."
I squeezed his arm which made him smile, we'd had a difficult upbringing and
things hadn't been made easier with our dad dying of Cancer but we'd turned out
okay all considering and it was the club that had helped us.

"I knew you were shagging Recon but I didn't realise it
was serious enough for babies." I rolled my eyes, "Uh, I see!"
I let out a sigh, "I don't want this conversation with you yet Diesel, I
need to process what's gone on. I'm still coming to terms with being stabbed
and losing a baby I didn't even know I was having."
"I understand, I'm sorry for pushing."
"No you're fine, I just have so much going on up here," I stated
tapping the side of my head. "But if you look at the flip side of things
it was probably for the best."
Diesel looked at me confused, "What do you mean?"
"Come on Diesel, we've been shagging for well over six months now and he
hasn't once mentioned commitment. Can you imagine bringing a baby into all of
that mess?" I gave him a small smile but the words were ripping me apart
as they came from my mouth. I was right but it didn't lessen the blow and help
with the loss I was feeling inside. My thoughts went quickly to Shaun, Diesel
and Amber hadn't planned for him to be conceived but he'd been a welcome
addition to the family. Maybe this was god's way of just telling me that I
wasn't ready yet but I would be in the future.

"There'll be plenty of time for me to have a family and
with someone who loves me the way that I love them." I said quietly as I glanced
toward Diesel but immediately saw the horror on his face. "What is
it?" I asked concerned.
"Nothing Amy, I just think you should get some rest. You've had a rough
twenty-two hours and one hell of a shock, I just think you need to take it
easy."
Diesel didn't make eye contact and busied himself retrieving his jacket from
the back of the chair, "Don't fucking fob me off, what is it Diesel?"
I shouted as I sat forward in the bed feeling a shooting pain in my stomach.
"Amy, let's do this later babe, please let's just do this later."
Diesel walked towards the door fastening his jacket.
"NO! Let's do this now. You either tell me or I'll get Spike in here and
you know that he can't keep secrets."
Diesel stopped in his tracks and slowly turned on his heels so that he was
facing me. He sniffed and wiped a tear that had trickled down his cheek with
the back of his hand before stepping closer towards the bed.
"You're scaring me Diesel, what's going on?"
He took a deep breath and placed his hands in his pockets, still unable to make
eye contact. "There were complications when they operated on you."
"Go on!" I said trying to get him to open up and put me out of my
misery.
"This is difficult Ames."
"I don't care, go on!"
Diesel let out a long sigh, "You won't be able to have children Ames,
there was nothing they could do."
"What do you mean...nothing as in nothing?" Diesel simply nodded his
head and raised his hand to touch me but I pulled away abruptly. "Don't
fucking touch me. I don't want you or any other club member near me," I
spat angrily. I knew it wasn't Diesel's fault or any other club member for that
matter but I was angry and I needed to blame someone, and it was better for me
to take that hatred out on the club rather than hating myself for agreeing to
help them with their latest operation. Diesel had warned me against helping the
club as he didn't want me to put myself in danger but I thought I knew best and
because of that I had paid the ultimate price.

I registered the hurt on Diesel's face but I didn't care, I
wanted to be alone and needed him out of this room so I could become consumed
with my own grief. "Didn't you hear me? I want you to leave now!" I
screamed grabbing the pillow from behind me and launching it in his direction. The
pain ripped through my stomach at the sudden movement and I let out an almighty
scream. Diesel surged forward catching the pillow and coming to my aid but I
swatted him away before laying down. "Just go Diesel, just fucking go and
leave me alone." He was hurt and I could see him battling with what to do
but he knew I'd be stubborn and he wouldn't win.
Diesel nodded his head understanding what I'd just said and turned slowly
before walking out of the room. Letting out a loud sigh I tried to contemplate
the chain of events and the information Diesel had just given me. I obviously
wouldn't be taking what he'd just said as gospel, I'd need to talk to a
professional but if his words were true and I had no reason to disbelieve him,
then my whole world had just crumbled around me.

I knew one thing for sure though, I couldn't let Recon know
of the situation. Diesel and Spike were family so I knew that they'd keep it
quiet if I asked them to and to be fair, they had up until now. If I alerted
Recon to the situation, then he would only go all out to try to catch the guy
responsible for stabbing me if the club hadn't already but I knew that it
wouldn't end there, if they got their man then the Dyers would take something of
ours and so the friction would continue. If I put a stop to it tonight
hopefully everything would become a little better, although the Aces would
probably want retribution for the hurt and pain I'd suffered even though they
weren't informed about the baby.

I lay on the bed deep in my thoughts when a light knock on
the door startled me. I wasn't ready for visitors and was hoping that it was only
one of the duty nurses asking if everything was okay. I slowly sat up, still
processing everything that had gone on recently and was surprised when Spike
put his head around the door.
"Are you up for visitors?" he asked hopefully.
"No I'm not Connor, I've got a lot of things going on at the moment."
He raised his brows and stared at me confused by my address towards him. I'd
always referred to him and the rest of the guys by their road names but I had
just this minute decided to call him by his Christian name trying my best to distance
myself as much as possible from the club and its members. Connor nodded his
head slowly before retreating from the room making sure he closed the door
behind him.

I took a deep breath and rested my hand on my tummy rubbing
it comfortingly. I knew there wasn't a baby inside but I felt empty knowing
that I would never be able to have children. The tears fell without me even
realising I was crying for my loss, staining my nightgown with the water
dripping from my cheeks.
How the hell was I going to get over this?

Recon

"What do you mean she doesn't want to see me?" I
asked trying to make my way past Diesel.
"As I said, it's not just you it's everyone. The doctor said she needed to
rest and that means no visitors." Diesel grabbed my forearms tightly
making it clear that I wasn't getting past, no matter how hard I tried.
I was tense from this standoff and how long it was taking for me to be able to
see her. I'd gotten the call from Bear earlier, informing me that Amy had been
injured in an altercation with the Dyers but at this stage, I was still none
the wiser as to how serious it was as no one was talking. I knew that she'd had
an operation and that she was now in recovery but I needed to see her for my
own peace of mind. I stepped back and Diesel's hands fell from my arms as I
regained my composure.
"Do you mind if I sit and wait?" I asked pointing towards the chairs
in the waiting area not far from Amy's room.
Diesel shrugged, "I can't guarantee how long it'll be before she's allowed
visitors but it's a free country." Diesel stated a little standoffish
before he turned on his heels and walked towards Spike. I suppose he was still
concerned about Amy's welfare although he must've known that I'd never hurt
her. I placed my hand in my pocket and wrapped my fingers firmly around the box
containing the ring that I was going to use to propose to Amy. I'd bought it
six weeks ago and had been looking for the perfect opportunity to ask the woman
I loved to marry me but things had been a little hectic of late. It wasn't the
norm to propose, you could simply claim a woman by making her your old lady but
Amy was special, one in a million and she deserved better.
I sat on the blue plastic chairs that were positioned around the waiting room,
and stretched out my legs trying to get comfortable as I knew I could be
sitting here for a while. Diesel was protective of Amy and rightly so but if he
was stating no one was to visit her, even I wasn't that fucking stupid to try
and defy him.

Sitting alone gave me time to reflect. I'd pursued Amy about
six months ago, I knew that I shouldn't have but she was fucking gorgeous and I
couldn't help myself. At first, it was my cock doing all the talking and she
seemed to enjoy being my booty call as much as I did hers but as time went on,
I developed feelings for her. I'd told myself when it first started that I
wasn't to fall for her, she was Diesel's little sister, Spike's cousin and the
clubs sweetheart but there was this pull between us that I just couldn't
resist.
I took the small black box from my pocket and flipped the lid open to see the
classic white gold band set with a single diamond. I removed the ring gently
and placed it onto my little finger as I went through the wording in my head
that I'd been practising for the past six weeks. It wasn't everyday that a man
proposed and I wanted to make sure I asked her correctly. I smiled to myself
knowing that the setting could've been a little better than a hospital but this
incident had given me the kick up the arse I needed and I wasn't too bothered
about details I just wanted to make Amy my wife.