An Alpha's Thunder (Water Bear Shifters 3) (8 page)

Caroline sat back in her chair, her eyes looking wide and interested. Lance did his best to remain calm and let her process what he had just told her, but it was difficult. He wanted to scoop her up in his arms and tell her that they would make this work no matter what. He wanted to breathe in deeply, memorizing the heady scent that was her. He wanted to kiss those full, sultry lips, and run his fingers down the smooth skin of her face.

But he couldn’t do any of that right now. He had to sit patiently and wait. He had to let her process the information he had just given her, and watch her reaction. He had reason to believe she might have been softening her stance toward him. After all, she hadn’t pulled away when he kissed her outside the bar earlier. But she had been in a state of shock, too, so he wasn’t sure how much he could read into that. So now, he held his breath, waiting for her response and hoping that she might give him some indication that she wanted to continue to get to know him, even if he was going to be living far away in Alaska.

But when she finally spoke, his hopes were dashed. She looked up at him with that neutral, unreadable expression that she did so well, and she shrugged.

“Well, I hope you enjoy being up there, and are able to stop the scientists. It’s too bad you’re leaving right when we were becoming better friends, but I guess that’s how life goes.”

Caroline stood abruptly and started making her way toward the door. “I should get going,” she said, her voice sounding somewhat hollow. “I’ve taken up enough of your time, and I’ve got things to do at home. I wish you all the best in Alaska. Look me up if you’re ever back in San Diego.”

Lance’s heart dropped as he watched her moving toward the door. She hadn’t said anything to indicate she wanted to try to make a long distance relationship work. And why would he have expected her too, really? She hadn’t been interested in a relationship with him when they were living in the same city. Why would she have suddenly changed her mind when he added an additional complication to the mix?

He watched as she put her hand on the doorknob to leave. He felt like he was about to watch his whole world walk out of his front door and out of his life.

Caroline took a deep breath and bit back the hot tears threatening to spill over her eyelids as she reached for Lance’s front doorknob. She told herself to get it together—that she had already rejected him and this was just confirmation that she had made the right choice. But for some reason, she felt despair filling her heart at the idea of Lance moving so far away.

Something about today had changed everything.

She wasn’t exactly sure at what point she had realized how much she cared about Lance. Maybe it had been at the bar, when she first realized that his life was in danger. Maybe it had been when he rushed in and saved her from the awful men who had held her hostage. Maybe it had been when she kissed him. Maybe it had even been just a few minutes ago, while she listened to his husky, sexy voice explaining how he was able to change into a panda bear, and why this had put his life in such danger.

Or maybe, it had been a combination of all these events. Whatever the reason, Caroline couldn’t deny that she had suddenly had a complete change of heart about dating Lance. She wanted him. Watching his sexy human muscles morph into strong bear legs and back again hadn’t deterred her. In fact, it had only made her attraction grow stronger. He was special. Unique. He knew what it felt like to hide part of who he was for fear that others would not accept him, which was something Caroline could appreciate all too well.

But she was a chicken. She couldn’t bring herself to tell him that she had changed her mind. She needed time to sort through all of this. Time to figure out the perfect way to tell him that she thought they had a good chance together, after all. She was good with paintings, not words. She couldn’t just quickly come up with the perfect monologue.

But she didn’t have time. He had just told her that he was almost certainly moving to Alaska soon. She didn’t have the luxury of formulating the right words in the right order, and so she decided to do what she had always done when she seemed to be out of options: run. She would run from the room, and from his condo. She would go home, and try her best to forget about him. She would go back into hiding, and let the days, weeks, and then months pass by. Life would go on. Eventually, she would finish another series of paintings, and hold another art show. People would rave about it, and she would be a little bit richer when they bought up her new pieces.

But even as her bank account filled, her heart would remain empty. She had been searching for Lance all this time, and she hadn’t even known it. She hadn’t understood why the color seemed to be missing from so much of her life, but now she did. Lance was meant for her, but how would they ever make it work? She lived here, in southern California, and he was about to move as far north in the United States as you possibly could. Despite the fact that he had wanted to date her before, and that he had kissed her earlier today, he didn’t seem interested in inviting her along to Alaska.

He had probably given up on her. And why wouldn’t he have? She had pushed him away at every turn. He was probably glad to move away.

Caroline’s thoughts churned in this confused mess of reasoning as she told herself to just keep it together long enough to get back to her car. She didn’t want Lance to see her cry. He would probably think she was overwhelmed by seeing him shift into a bear. The last thing she wanted was for him to start worrying that she couldn’t handle the information. She could. She wouldn’t go to the police. She would bury his secret deep in her heart and keep it there, along with her other few memories of her short time knowing Lance.

She turned the doorknob and began to open the front door, taking a deep breath and bravely holding her back straight. She could do this. Just don’t look back. One step forward at a time until she reached her car.

But as the door creaked open, Lance’s deep, husky voice brought her escape plan to a screeching halt.

“Stop,” he said. “Wait.”

Caroline froze with her hand on the doorknob and the door opened just a crack. She stared straight ahead and took deep, calming breaths, willing the tears to go away.

“What?” she asked, still not turning around. Her heart was thumping wildly in her chest, screaming at her to just get over herself and run straight into his arms, telling him that she wanted to try to make things work, even if that meant moving to Alaska. Maybe
especially
if that meant moving to Alaska. Sure, it would be cold, but she’d deal with that. And she had been dreaming of going to a new place, anyway. A place where no one knew her name and she could go out anywhere without worrying about getting stuck in an hour long conversation about her art.

But she didn’t say anything. She didn’t turn around and run to him. She just stood there, frozen, silently praying that he would somehow understand that she needed him without her telling him. She silently prayed that he would take another chance on asking her to be his girl, ignoring all the times she had already shot him down.

She needed him to be the brave one right now. She needed him to be the strong one, the risk taker.

And somehow, despite all the chaos and confusion of the day, he seemed to sense that. He seemed to know exactly what she needed.

“Turn around, Caroline,” he said. His voice was tender, but firm.

She did as he said, willing her lip to stop trembling as she turned and forced herself to meet his gaze. She managed to keep her tears from spilling over, but she knew it was obvious that she was on the edge of crying.

“Why did you call me today?” he asked.

Caroline shrugged. “I know you, even if I don’t know you well. I knew the guys were talking about you, and I didn’t want you to get hurt.”

Lance stroked his chin thoughtfully. “Shut the door and come here,” he said. Again, Caroline did as she was told, not sure exactly where he was going with this. She came back to the living room and sat gingerly on the couch beside Lance. She put her hands under her legs to keep herself from fluttering them around nervously.

“We shifters believe that there is one person for everyone. That person is known as our lifemate—the person we are fated to be with forever. It’s like the concept of a soulmate, except deeper than that. Lifemates are bonded from the moment they are born, and they are drawn to each other constantly throughout their lives. When they finally meet, and mate, the bond is sealed. Their deep connection to each other means they can sense when the other person is in danger. They are driven to protect each other.”

Caroline held her breath as Lance spoke. Her heart began pounding faster as she realized where he was going with this, and realized that she might have another chance with him, after all.

“Caroline,” Lance said softly. “I feel drawn to you. The pull is strong, leaving me powerless to resist. I believe we are lifemates, and I believe that’s why you were in that bar today. It wasn’t an accident. You were drawn there because somewhere deep inside of you, you knew that I was in danger. You knew I needed help. And you did help me. You saved my life. I knew the moment I heard your voice on the phone today that you were calling me because you were my lifemate, and you needed to protect me.”

Caroline let out the breath she had been holding, and finally spoke. “I don’t disagree with you, Lance,” she said. “I felt something I’ve never felt before in that bar today. It was a strange mixture of concern, admiration, and a desire to protect. I don’t know how to explain it, but it must have been the lifemate bond you were talking about. And even now, sitting here and listening to you explain shifting, something feels different to me. I feel connected to you. But...but what does it matter? You’re moving far away. I’ll rarely see you, if ever, once you’re settled in Alaska. And I’m not a long distance relationship kind of girl. Lifemate bond or not, thousands of miles between a couple wears down the lines of communication over time. Surviving on occasional visits and phone conversations is no way to live.”

“I agree,” Lance said. “It’s no way to live.”

He was still stroking his chin, seemingly lost in thought, and Caroline felt bitterness and frustration rising up in her stomach. Why had he confessed his feelings for her, and explained the lifemate bond, if he was still planning to just leave and leave her behind? Caroline sighed and started to stand. The traitorous tears were welling up in her eyes again, and she wanted to get out of here before Lance saw her cry.

“I should go,” she said, taking quick steps toward the doorway. Moments later, Lance was on his feet, too. He caught her hand and spun her around to face him. When he did, his chest was so close that it brushed against her own chest, sending tingles of desire shooting through her body as her breasts responded to his body’s making contact with them. His face was inches from her face, and she was overcome by the warmth of his breath against her skin. No matter how much she told herself to remain calm, she couldn’t stop the heat of passion that was beginning to burn between her legs.

“Not so fast,” Lance said. “You’re right that a long distance relationship is no way to live, and that’s why I want you to come with me to Alaska.”

Caroline felt her heart leap. He was asking her to move with him! He was really asking! Her eyes widened, and a powerful flood of happiness overtook her.

Lance mistook her wide eyes for hesitation, and quickly continued speaking. “I know you have a life here. And I know you’ve already rejected me. But I’m asking you to reconsider everything and come to Alaska. I’m sure it must sound like a crazy request, but you can’t deny that there’s chemistry between us. There’s a bond. We’re meant for each other. You can continue painting up there, and you can come down here for art shows. I know it won’t be easy, but I promise you it will be worth it. I’ll do whatever I can to make it work. I just can’t bear the thought of life without you. I don’t have a choice but to follow my rescue crew up there. Believe me, if I could, I would stay here with you. But it’s a matter of life and death for us. We have to stop the scientists. Please, don’t make me go to the cold wilderness of Alaska alone. Come with me. Say you’ll be my girl. Please.”

Lance paused, seeming unable to say anything else. He had said his piece, and he waited with anxious eyes for Caroline’s response. She smiled, her grin stretching from ear to ear as she threw her arms around him and held him close.

“Yes,” she said. “Yes, yes, yes! If you aren’t here, there’s nothing here for me, anyway. And I’ve been thinking about needing a new place to move to. Things have started to feel stale here to me. I need a fresh place where no one knows who I am, and I can create art just for the sake of creating art. I want to be with you, and to go to Alaska with you. I need you in my life, and I feel bonded to you. I’ve never heard of the concept of lifemates before today, but it makes perfect sense to me, because I feel that kind of connection to you. You and I are destined for each other.”

Lance’s eyes began burning with an intense heat, and Caroline felt the warmth of his gaze shooting through her entire body. Her breathing became even more rapid, and moisture began building between her legs as her body ached for his touch. Emboldened by the passion of the moment, she tilted her head forward and brought her lips to Lance’s. She might not be the best with words, but she could
show
him how she felt.

Lance let out a low growl as their mouths met. Electric energy shot through both of their bodies, and Caroline could feel the energy of their kiss radiating through every inch of her body. It seemed impossible to believe that only hours earlier she had insisted to herself that she was better off without this man. The way he was making her feel right now was nothing short of incredible, and she found herself craving more of him. She could feel his rock hard erection through the fabric of their clothes, and she pressed her hips against his to get a better feel of what he had to offer.

Damn. He was huge. She already knew that from seeing him naked in the bar earlier, but she was still surprised by how big his erection was. Even through her jeans she could feel the solidness and largeness of his dick. Any thoughts she might have had about taking it slow flew out the window. She wanted him, and she wanted him now. She reached for his t-shirt and pulled it up and over his head, tossing it aside as she admired his sculpted chest and abs. Now that she knew he was a bear shifter, she could clearly see what a bear of a man he was. He was so huge, and so strong. She’d never met anyone like him before.

Her heart beat wildly as he reached for her t-shirt and pulled it off as well, leaving her wearing a simple, beige bra. She cursed herself for not putting on fancier underwear, although, to be fair, she’d had absolutely no thoughts about this meeting actually ending up with her naked in front of Lance. If he noticed the plainness of her bra, though, he did a good job of hiding it. He seemed much more interested in what was underneath her clothes than what the clothes themselves looked like. She shivered as he used his fingers to trace a line from her chin, down her neck, between her breasts, and across her belly-button. He paused right above the button on her jeans, and looked at her with searching, concerned eyes.

“Are you sure you want this?” he asked. “If I’m right, and we’re lifemates, then sleeping together will cement the bond. You’ll be unable to completely tear yourself away from me, no matter how far away we are. Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

Caroline breathed in deeply, then exhaled slowly. She was trying unsuccessfully to steady her voice, but the passion burning within her being was too strong. She was trembling with anticipation, and she didn’t want to talk about what they were doing anymore. She just wanted to do it.