“Just drink lots of salt water and call in sick tomorrow so you can rest.” I tiptoed behind them. The cool grass tickled my feet. “In fact, don’t worry about calling. I’ll tell Chase.”
“You really know how to party,” Wendy slurred behind me. “I haven’t danced that much in years.”
“Then we should do this every week.” I yawned and paused so she could catch up with me. “Once a week we’ll go out and party.”
“And we’ll make sure Lucy doesn’t drink too much.” Wendy stumbled and fell face-first onto the ground. “Or me either.”
I scrunched my face up in horror and sprinted her way.
Grass and dirt stuck to her forehead. She rolled over and cackled. The noise rose in the air and spread across the front of the estate. I was sure we’d woken up Chase and Dawn. As soon as the thought charged to my brain, an ache slammed against my stomach.
Chase and Dawn.
I’d been forcing myself to not think about them or what they were doing while we danced at the bar.
Was he cuddling with her and whispering how this night was so perfect, like he’d told me on the plane? Had they made love? Did he already forget about the nights we’d shared in Paris?
“What’s wrong?” Wendy stopped laughing. “Are you alright?”
I nodded and extended my hand to her. “This is just weird for me. Usually after a fun night I call my boyfriend and talk for a while about our day, but that’s not really an option in this situation.”
Wendy frowned. “No. We’re not supposed to contact or spend time with him on other women’s nights. It protects us all.”
“I can see that.”
“And to make sure no one’s feelings are hurt, Chase never spends the night.”
I wrinkled my forehead. “Oh really?”
“Yes. Even when Chase and I travel, he’ll get his own room so at the end of the night we’ve respected the rules.”
“Of course. That’s what we did.” I turned away so she couldn’t see the lie on my face.
Would our trips be different? No cuddling ever? That might be a deal breaker.
I laughed.
Of all the things for me to put my foot down on, cuddling seemed a bit trivial.
Wendy gave me an odd look. “What?”
“Nothing.”
A black woman with long brown hair ran out from the front door. “Ms. Wendy, are you okay?”
“Oh Zola, I need you.” Wendy spread her arms so Zola could help her up.
Again, the unsettling agitation that all of Chase’s maids were black hit me.
It shouldn’t even matter. What is wrong with me tonight? Maybe they remind me of Grandma.
My grandma had worked as a maid all of her life, until her back’s throbbing wouldn’t disappear from pain killers and her employer forced her to retire. She’d spent her days on her knees scrubbing and cleaning a rich family’s house, just to come home to an alcoholic jobless husband who beat her and five hungry kids who needed to eat, do homework, and prepare for the next day. My drunken grandfather died long before I was born. Now, Grandma lived in a small retirement home with her boyfriend, a cook for the family she used to work for.
And every time I visited her, we strolled around the retirement community, hand in hand, greeting all her friends, “Here’s my granddaughter. She went to Harvard, you know. Won’t be any toilet cleaning in her future. She’ll pay someone to do that.”
She might be right, but I don’t think being a rich man’s fourth girlfriend is what she meant.
Wendy leaned on Zola as they headed up the pathway. I trailed behind them. White light bathed the staircase. Two other black maids walked by me while they walked down the stairs. They smiled at me, and I cringed a little inside, somewhat embarrassed for them to see me here.
What would Grandma say if she was a maid here? Would she feel bad for the black girl or think the arrangement was not at all unusual?
We reached the stairs with no further vomiting or stumbling.
“Goodnight, Wendy.” I watched her amble toward her apartment. The door with the huge number one opened. Dawn stepped out in a pink robe and ostrich-feathered heel slippers. An old episode of
Desperate Housewives
flashed in my head.
Whoa. I didn’t know people actually wore slippers with heels.
“Jasmine, I’m thrilled you spent time with Wendy and Lucy.” Dawn displayed a warm grin. Make-up coated her face. Even her blonde hair maintained a stylish curl. She exuded a flawless beauty. I was dropping lower into a crater of insecurity with each second that I glanced at her.
“Yeah. We had fun.” I fingered the diamond-studded number four on my key.
“I’m excited you’re giving us a chance.” She moved in closer. Her perfume swirled around me. It was something intoxicating and flowery—the scent of fresh roses mingled with violets. Like Chase, no blemishes or imperfections marked her skin.
I’m so out of his league. Why the hell would he even need other women when he has her?
“We started off rocky.” Dawn tossed her blonde curls over her slim shoulders. “And I blame Chase for that. He disrespected our nights and it just made me so frustrated I sent that mean message to you without a second thought. I’m sorry about that.”
“It’s forgiven.”
She extended her hand to me. “So let’s start over.”
We shook.
“Are you okay with the new schedule?” She squeezed my hand a little. “It may seem unfair at first, but I’m trying to give everyone their date nights back that were lost during Chase’s pursuit of you.”
“Um...what do you mean? What about the schedule?” I tugged my hand back.
“Your date night doesn’t start until two weeks. Didn’t you see the schedule? I had Mable place it in your apartment.”
Are you kidding me?
“Oh. So I don’t spend time with him at all?”
“Well, you’ll see him at work. Perhaps you can go to lunch or do breakfast during that time.” She pulled out a tiny phone and handed it to me. It was white with a black four on it.
Oh God. Will this number always follow me around? Do we get freaking t-shirts and hats too?
“This is your new phone. It has an app for our schedule.” She pressed the screen and an image of her smiling face materialized with the words
Calendar
under her face.
Shoot me in the head now, please.
“All of our websites and contacts are on the phone, too.”
“Websites?”
“Wendy and Lucy didn’t tell you?”
“No. I guess not.”
“I run an alternative lifestyle blog. It’s a way for us to connect with others in our situation.” She smiled with pride. “It’s really fun exchanging stories and learning from other women all around the globe. Feel free to post something whenever you want. Just send it to me first for approval.”
“Umm...I’ll think about it.”
“Now, you need to remember that your therapist appointment is the last Thursday of every month. And please feel free to tell her anything.” She held her hand up to stop me as I began to talk. “Lucy said you wanted to use your own, but that’s just not possible. I mean, heavens, this situation can’t be made public to anyone. It would destroy Chase and me.”
I tensed. “You mean all of us, right? It’s not just you and Chase in this situation and surely you two aren’t the most significant. I’m not excited about any of my family or friends discovering this, either.”
“Oh gracious, of course you’re important.” She seemed far too cheery. “But, Chase and I have huge public reputations—”
“I’ll use my own therapist and gynecologist.” I stepped around her. “I’ll see them every month like you want, but I won’t have you or Chase telling me who I seek counsel from or choose to have examine my own body.”
“Jasmine, you have to understand that Chase and I are providing you with a great life.”
Now I really understand when people say, “My pimp hand is getting itchy.”
I turned to stare at her for a minute. Rage rose in me to the point where I had to run out of the hallway or I might consider slapping her. In the end, it wasn’t her who pissed me off. It was the constant
Chase and I
that kept escaping those full and perfect lips.
“I’m done discussing the therapist and gynecologist,” I said.
“Excuse me?” she hissed.
“I’ll follow your schedule and rules, but there will be some limits.”
“Well, then we need to talk to Chase because it’s intolerable for you to think you can just waltz in here establishing your own limits.”
I pointed to her. “You’re insane if you think I’ll just do whatever you say! I’m a grown woman—”
“I didn’t say you—”
“I’m not some glorified mistress that you order around!” My voice rose higher than I intended.
Oh my god. I have to get it together.
I twisted around. “And you can tell Chase! I don’t give a fuck!”
“Jasmine, wait.” Dawn hurried my way as I stopped. “Maybe you need some time before we discuss this any further. And...I can always have your therapist and doctor checked out.”
I formed my hands into fists and dug my fingernails into my skin. “Okay.”
She placed her hand on my shoulder. “If we all want to survive this...whatever this is, we have to treat each other with respect and dignity as well as follow the rules. I am willing to meet you halfway with certain things.”
“Fine. As long as you understand that I do have limits and my own personal needs.”
“You’re not a glorified mistress.” Dawn’s cheeks tinted red.
I sure do feel that way.
“Thank you.”
She removed her hand and put them both into her robe’s pockets. “However, I am worried that Chase is allowing you to date and have sex with other men. He informed me of this tonight.”
I crossed my arms around my chest. “Did he explain that the men will be investigated and tested before I begin a sexual relationship with them?”
“Yes, but that doesn’t stop me from thinking your dating will complicate things.”
“I’m not going to sit in my damn apartment like a good little girl waiting as Chase tramps around with you all.”
“Jasmine?”
“I’m drunk and annoyed.” I stormed off. “Let’s just talk about this tomorrow.”
“Maybe we can do lunch?”
Maybe after you go do yourself with a broomstick.
“Fine.” I rushed with unlocking my apartment door, opened it, and hurried in without hearing her reply.
I’ve lost my mind. I’m here less than twenty-four hours and not one moment have I felt like this is a great idea.
I leaned on the door and rubbed my face, as if that would help me discover some hidden answer to what I should do next. I’d promised Chase three months, but was now thinking I would only do a week.
Maybe once I’m back in my own apartment it will be better? Then I don’t have to see his women all the time.
Just like that time in India, I drowned in a sensation of being alone. I scanned my empty apartment. Although huge and crowded with expensive furniture, it didn’t embody me. It only represented what Chase thought I was. My phone buzzed. I checked the screen.
Vivian:
Did you arrive home safely?
Me:
Yes. I’ve returned to my pimp’s castle.
Vivian:
Stop that. Maybe I was too hard on you. I’m sorry.
Me:
Am I being stupid for trying this?
Several seconds passed before she replied. I tapped my foot. My nerves flared on edge as if her answer would decide the next days of my life.
It probably would.
I craved an opinion from someone who knew me and my limits better than I knew myself.
Vivian:
You’re being stupid only if you think so.
Me:
Wtf? That’s not an answer!
Vivian:
Just try it, I guess, until you don’t like it anymore.
Me:
And if I get hurt?
Vivian:
Then I get to shank him!
Suddenly, I didn’t feel by myself anymore.
Vivian:
Goodnight. Your brother’s big cock is calling.
Me:
I’ve now written you out of my will!
Chapter 25
A
fter the altercation
with Dawn in the hallway and the moment of doubt inside my new place, I needed to relax and lighten my mood. I took a long hot shower, brushed my teeth, lit all of the sea breeze candles I could find, placed them around my bed, and filled the air with Sapphire’s song “Make Believe Lover.” I collapsed onto the bed and climbed under the covers in new silk pajamas I assumed Chase had bought me. They’d been folded on my bed. My name was embroidered on the pockets and since it didn’t have a big four on it, I figured Dawn had no control over the purchase.
Sapphire’s soulful voice mingled with the smooth notes of the guitar and piano.
Who needs Chase when I have my own imaginary man?
Immediately, I journeyed to that beach with my daydreamed lover, breathing in the fresh air of the sea—so sweet, but utterly calming. I imagined his strong arms covering my body instead of the blankets, that it was soft sand under my body instead of the bed, his succulent taste on my tongue instead of stale rum.
“Make believe lover, lounging on the beach, drinking in my love,
” Sapphire sang.
“He comes when you need him the most and showers down his love.”
“Are you asleep?” Chase asked behind me.
I screamed and jumped out of bed, dragging blankets to the other side of the room with me.
“Baby? It’s me.” Chase waved his hands.
“How the hell did you get in? I locked the door, right?” My heart raced. I held my hand to my chest and waited for my heartbeat to calm down. “I put the bar up on the door, too. I know I did. I always—”
“You probably did lock the front door. I got in here another way. The original house owner was a bit paranoid so there are secret escape routes all over the property. I came here from a crooked stairwell that links my closet to yours.” Chase’s eyes traveled around the room and gazed at the lit candles. “This is magical. You must have twenty candles in here. But you can’t go to sleep like this. A fire could start.”