‘Dinner is served,’ he said, appearing with the first five plates balanced on his arms. He served the ladies first, something Kenny’s idiot waiters never did, however much Guy
had bollocked them for it. He took his place at the end of the table, next to Floz, because that’s where Juliet had directed her to sit. She was going to make sure they became friends.
The fish was beautifully cooked – a triumph. Everyone was making noises of approval.
‘How nice was that?’ sighed Juliet, blotting her lips with her serviette. ‘Aren’t you a catch for some lucky single woman?’
Steve raised his eyes heavenward. He hoped Juliet wasn’t going to try and do some match-making.
‘Isn’t he, Floz? Isn’t he a catch?’ Juliet nudged Floz hard.
Steve kicked Juliet under the table and when she swung her eyes around to him, he gave her a warning look.
‘Yes, of course,’ said Floz, staring bashfully at her empty plate.
‘Let me help you clear the plates,’ said Steve, quickly standing and gathering them up, following Guy into the kitchen, where his friend immediately turned on him.
‘Tell me you haven’t said anything to Juliet?’
‘No, I haven’t,’ Steve protested in a strained whisper. ‘Do you honestly think I’d tell her that you fancy the arse off Floz?’
‘What’s she playing at then?’ said Guy.
‘Fuck knows,’ said Steve. ‘Just dish up the main course and fill her gob so she can’t talk.’
Conversation in the dining room turned to weddings as Guy began to carve up the crown of turkey and Steve the tender leg of lamb.
‘I don’t want a big frock,’ said Juliet.
‘You have to have the full meringue!’ screamed Coco in disgust. ‘You can’t have a crappy plain one. And what are you doing about bridesmaids?’
‘Floz, of course,’ said Juliet. ‘And you as the male equivalent. I want you to walk down the aisle behind me, though I wouldn’t expect you to wear a dress,
obviously.’
‘Thank goodness,’ snorted Coco. ‘I’m not a tranny!’
‘Oh how lovely,’ said Floz. ‘I’ve never been a bridesmaid before.’
‘Me neither,’ chirped Coco. ‘What colour will we be in?’
‘I’m thinking autumn colours,’ mused Juliet, harking back to that conversation with Daphne about her own autumn wedding.
‘Ooh, plush.’ Coco gave a shriek of glee.
‘You’ll have to get started on the arrangements, Juliet.’ Grainne took a sip of wine. ‘By my reckoning you’ve only got about thirty-five days until November the
fifth.’
‘Chuffing hell,’ said Juliet.
‘Well, if you can’t pull this off, no one can,’ smiled Floz. ‘You’re a true tour de force.’
Steve and Guy started to ferry in bowls of vegetables and perfectly puffed-up Yorkshire puddings.
‘Oh, by the way, we booked the Oak Leaf for the reception this morning,’ announced Juliet, expecting rightly that everyone would look at her aghast. ‘I know what you’re
going to say, but I didn’t want you cooking on my big day, Guy. Plus Burgerov is a shit-hole.’
‘I agree,’ said Guy. ‘It’s a shame but it won’t be refurbished in time for your wedding otherwise I wouldn’t have taken no for an answer. I could do the
catering for you somewhere else if you—’
‘No way do I want you doing anything on that day but joining in the festivities and being best man. It’s decided. So don’t give me any grief about it.’
Grief loses its hard edge after a time
. . .
‘So, what are you going to do with the flat?’ asked Perry, spearing a large crunchy roast potato.
‘What do you mean?’ Juliet replied, through a mouthful of caramelized carrot.
‘Well, I presume you’ll be moving in with Steve. You can’t get a pram up and down those stairs in Blackberry Court. There’s no lift, is there?’
Juliet dropped her fork. Things had happened so fast she hadn’t thought about any practicalities like that. Her dad was right, although Steve’s place would be too tiny really for
long-term plans – just having the one bedroom.
And if she did sell, where would Floz go?
She looked up at Floz and saw that she had just been hit by the same thunderbolt. And if she
had looked to the side, she would have noticed that the thunderbolt had managed to floor Guy too.
‘Floz,’ said Juliet. ‘I hadn’t even thought about the flat.’
‘Well, it’s certainly something you
need
to think about,’ said Floz in a calm voice that masked the inner turmoil that had just been unleashed in her. She had been
living with Juliet for less than two months now, but it felt so much like a home. What were the chances of her finding a flat and flat-mate like this again? She had been too lucky living in lovely
Blackberry Court with Juliet and being absorbed into this wonderful family. The prospect of leaving their warm world was a shivery cold one.
Juliet burst into tears.
‘Hormones!’ was Grainne’s verdict as she quickly stood to put her arm around her daughter.
‘Oh Floz, I’m so sorry,’ sobbed Juliet. ‘I honestly never thought about having to move out of the flat.’
‘Don’t be daft,’ said Floz, her smile brave.
‘I love my flat,’ wept Juliet. ‘I hate Steve’s house.’
‘I hate it myself,’ said Steve. ‘We’ll have to get rid of both and buy something else. It’s hardly big enough for me, never mind you and a baby as well.’
‘Or
babies
,’ Grainne threw into the mix.
‘Oh my GOD I could be carrying twins!’ Juliet couldn’t bear any more thunderbolts. Her family was a twin factory. She and Guy were fifth-generation twins. ‘How long will
it take to sell up and move?’ The enormity of having to sell two properties as well as have a baby and arrange a marriage fell on Juliet like a ton of rubble and made her tears flow
faster.
‘Oh God, what have I done?’ said Perry, unable to remember the last time he’d ever seen his daughter cry. ‘Me and my big mouth.’
‘Well, at least Floz could move into Guy’s flat,’ suggested Steve, trying to be helpful so the lovely meal wasn’t spoiled.
‘What?’
said Guy.
‘When you move out and buy Hallow’s Cottage, I meant,’ Steve said, seizing his moment to spill the beans for Guy and hopefully get him the help from his family which he refused
to ask for.
‘Hallow’s Cottage?’ asked Perry. ‘That’s never come up for sale, has it? After all these years?’
‘You can forget Hallow’s Cottage,’ said Guy gruffly.
‘I know, I know, you can’t afford it, you already told me,’ said Steve, planting a well-meaning seed quickly in the heart of the gathering.
Juliet had dried her eyes and Grainne returned to her seat, but the atmosphere around the table had changed just as surely as a stormcloud drifts across the face of the sun. Neither Juliet nor
Grainne felt like eating any more food. Juliet was worrying about Floz. Grainne was worrying about Juliet worrying about Floz. Steve was worrying that he shouldn’t have said anything about
Hallow’s Cottage. Perry was worrying that he had spoiled the atmosphere. Guy was annoyed that Steve had stirred up thoughts of Hallow’s Cottage, which he would never own and never share
with a woman like Floz. And if she had to leave the flat, bang went his chances of ever being able to call on his sister and see her by default. What if she moved away? Only Stripies, who rubbed
against Guy’s leg under the table hoping for some meat scraps, seemed carefree.
Hardly anyone ate the desserts. Guy cleared the plates and tipped the waste into the bin. His beautiful meal hadn’t seduced Floz, after all; it had just been the backdrop to a much bigger
story being played out with all the house-swapping news. Juliet felt tired and a bit headachey and so Steve drove her and Floz home in his new family car. Guy loaded the dishwasher, crashing the
plates into the slots.
‘Son, can I have a word?’ Perry appeared in the kitchen door, puffing on his pipe.
Guy straightened up. ‘Course, Dad, what’s up?’
‘Steve said you couldn’t afford to buy Hallow’s Cottage.’
‘Steve’s got a big mouth,’ said Guy.
‘I’ve just been looking at it on the internet.’
‘Then you’ll see why I wouldn’t consider buying it. It’s a dump.’ Guy closed the dishwasher door and tried not to use the force that was stored up in his arm.
‘Your mother and I have been talking.’
Guy held up his hand to stop his father. ‘No. I know what you’re going to say and the answer is no.’
‘The answer is yes,’ said Perry calmly. ‘We are going to be giving Juliet a lump sum for her wedding and the baby, and we’ll be giving the same amount to you. It’s
the right time to do this, son. The money is there for you both and there’s no point in waiting until we die. Your mother and I would rather see you enjoy it and have it when you need
it.’
He stretched out his hand in which he held a cheque.
Guy looked at the cheque. It was made out to him for
£
180,000.
‘Dad, that’s a hell of a lot of money!’ said Guy, keeping his hands by his side.
‘When your Uncle Stan and I sold the factory we made a big profit on the land at the side of it because we secured planning permission for it. Your mother and I are more than all right
money-wise, and we’ll enjoy seeing you buy that house rather than us having to die first so you can inherit what we want you to have, like with Stan and his son. God knows we’ve tried
to make the pair of you have something from us for long enough – it’s time for you to see sense now. Take the money, son, and buy the house. You’ve coveted it since you were a wee
boy.’
Perry flapped the cheque at Guy and when he still didn’t take it, he put it into his son’s hand and closed his fingers around it.
‘There, that wasn’t so hard, now was it?’
‘Dad, I don’t know what to say.’
‘Say, “Thank you, Daddy.” That’ll do.’
‘Thanks, Dad.’
Guy threw his giant arms around his father and crushed him to his chest. He loved this man so much. And he felt love from him every day of his life.
When they finally drew apart, Perry lifted up his pipe again and puffed on it. Then he turned to go and tell Grainne the good news that Guy had taken the money. ‘Go buy the house,
son,’ he said over his shoulder.
Floz pulled up pictures of Osoyoos on the internet. It looked as stunning as he had described it in past emails. She wanted to see it soon – in Nick’s favourite
season. Only then could she say a true goodbye. Although being anchored to grief seemed more desirable than cutting adrift and going in an uncertain direction.
Grief loses its hard edge after a time
. . .
Juliet was uncharacteristically down in the dumps. She’d spent hours over the weekend looking on the net for suitable houses for a family. Her mother and father were
giving her and Steve a huge lump sum of money towards the wedding and a new home, which was exciting – but she was still feeling guilty about Floz.
At lunchtime on Monday she rang Steve almost in tears.
‘Look, if the worst comes to the worst,’ he said kindly, ‘we can rent somewhere big enough so that Floz can stay with us until she gets a suitable place. How’s
that?’
Juliet smiled for the first time all morning. ‘You don’t mind?’
‘No, course not,’ said Steve. ‘We’ll have to put my place and yours up for a reasonable price so we’ve got a good chance of shifting them quickly. Then we’ll
buy somewhere. It’s a bit messy but I’m sure it’ll all sort itself out in the end.’
‘I love you, Steve Feast.’
Steve smiled sloppily. He just hoped that the magic of their own fairytale ending would spread in Floz and Guy’s direction.
That morning Guy was walking around Hallow’s Cottage with Jeff Leppard, whose real name was Bob Sedgewick: Bob the builder extraordinaire.
‘Well, Crusher,’ mused Jeff, ‘it’s not as big a job for you as it might at first appear.’ All the wrestlers tended to refer to each other by their aliases both in
and out of the ring.
‘Or for you. If you want the job.’
‘Can we do it? Yes, we can,’ laughed Jeff. ‘It’s quiet this winter, so I can set a gang on as soon as you complete the sale, if you give me a bit of notice when that will
be.’
‘I’ll set things in motion straight away,’ said Guy.
‘Roof’s sound as a pound,’ Jeff went on, ‘so you’ve not got that to worry about at least. Walls need a damp-proof course, obviously, and total replastering, but I
presume you’ll be getting Angel to do that bit for you. Floors all need sanding, but my God they’ll be lovely. Look at the quality of those oak boards. Fucking smashing, they
are.’
Jeff was smitten with the same vision as Guy as he imagined the cottage after his lads had gotten their hands on it. Except his vision didn’t involve Floz in knickers, high heels and an
apron frying bacon on the jewel of an old Aga that was in the kitchen.
When Juliet got in that night, there was a note waiting for her to say that Floz had gone shopping to Meadowhall and the answering machine was flashing.
‘Message for Miss Cherrydale. I’ve emailed you the flight costs to Canada and accommodation choices as you requested. I’m just checking that you received them as you seemed
in a bit of a hurry to organize it.’
Canada? Why the hell was Floz going to Canada – and quickly? And, more to the point, was it anything to do with that so-called mysterious ‘old flame’?
The answering-machine message had just finished playing when the entryphone sounded.
‘It’s me. Let me in. I have a surprise for you,’ trilled Coco. Juliet buzzed him up and in he walked – and not alone.
The man with him was tall and well-built, had thick curly brown hair and trendy black glasses, and was everything that Coco’s past partners had not been. There were no piercings or tattoos
or pink streaks or weird trousers. Gideon was in a
geek-chic
suit. He was very handsome, Juliet decided, in a sexy businessman sort of way.
‘This is Gideon,’ said Coco, his face all smiles. ‘We were just passing and Gideon said “Come on, let’s call in and see your girlfriends.” Where’s
lovely Floz?’
‘Meadowhall, shopping,’ explained Juliet, giving Gideon a nice friendly hello kiss. Fabulous aftershave.