An Impossible Dilemma: A Psychological Thriller Novel (15 page)

 

Chapter 19

“Breakfast’s ready,” I called, and within seconds they all descended like a herd of starving animals.

Steph and Hector ran down the stairs, giggling like the young lovers they were.  Frank came out of the snug, Alex from the bathroom, and Emily from the garden.

“Wow! That’s a first,” I said. “It normally takes at least three yells before you respond. I’m not quite ready yet,” I laughed.

“We’re starving,” Stephanie laughed.

“Stavin,” Hector repeated. Steph had been trying to teach him English and we all joined in around the dinner table. This often confused the poor guy. Steph and I had Mancunian accents, Frank a broad Cumbrian one, and Alex an American one.

“St-aar-ving,” Emily said, breaking the word down for him.

“Starvig,” Hector said.

“That’s close enough, Hector.” I smiled and nodded. “We don’t want to know what you’ve been doing to create such an appetite, do we guys?”

There was a resounding “No!” from everyone, including Emily, which made us all laugh more.

“Right, how about I pile it onto the table and you can help yourselves?”

“Kkhelp yourselp,” Hector continued, obviously enjoying us all laughing at his expense.

“Help. Ha-ha-help,” Emily said, mimicking what she’d heard Steph say in the past.

“Khe-khe-khelp.”

“You’re funny, Hekker,” Emily laughed.

I placed a heaped plate of bacon and fried eggs into the middle of the table, and a stack of toast.

“Hegs.”

“Eggs!” Emily squealed.

“Okay, you two, enough. Get eating before its stone cold,” I said.

“Hegs,” Hector said again, looking at Emily for her response.

Stephanie said something to him in Spanish and nudged him in the ribs. Then Hector and Emily burst into fits of giggles again, in a joke of their own.

Frank filled Emily’s plate for her as I produced a pot of tea and sat down.

“You not eating, Vic?” Steph asked, her eyes squinting at me in an unspoken reprimand.

“I had a slice of toast earlier. I’m not that hungry,” I said, eyeballing her right back.

The morning sickness seemed to be settling down but I still couldn’t face a full breakfast, especially bacon. I could barely face cooking it.

We hadn’t told anybody else about the baby, especially after Doctor Wilson’s shocking revelations. However, I was almost seventeen weeks gone already and although it was possible to have a termination up to twenty-four weeks, the procedure was much more difficult. After the twenty-week mark it would mean I would have to deliver the baby as normal. Prior to twenty weeks meant they could perform a D&E, still horrible, but a much easier option.

But in truth, although I hated the thought of having Shane’s baby, how could I kill an innocent little child? The fluttering sensations I’d felt over the past few days made the situation even more real.

“So what do you have planned today, Alex?” I asked.

“I’m going on a trip with some friends to Gretna Green,” he said.

“Ooh, anything you want to tell us?” Steph pitched in.

“Sorry?” He shook his head, puzzled.

“Are you eloping?” she said, “You know, getting married.”

“Oh, no,” he shook his head.

“Just kidding,” Steph said. “You do know that’s where people used to run away to get married, don’t you?”

“I had heard about it. Not me though. I’d need a girlfriend first.”

“I thought you had a girlfriend,” I said. “You went to meet someone a few weeks ago.”

He shook his head, finishing what he was eating before wiping his mouth on a napkin. “I told you; she was just a friend.”

“You must have girls falling over themselves to be your girlfriend.”

“No chance of that I’m afraid. Besides, I’m too busy for girls right now. They just complicate things.”

“Very sensible, Alex. Girls
always
complicate things.” Frank laughed.

“Watch it you … or you’ll end up cooking your own dinner.”

“Present company excluded, of course,” Frank said, still laughing.

“Of course.” I gave him my most stern look.

“Grandad’s in trouble.” Emily laughed.

“Did you recognise that expression, Em?” Stephanie said, amused.

Emily nodded, frantically chewing.

“What should we do today, Emily? Any suggestions,” I asked.

“A picanic.”

“A picnic? Do you honestly think you’ll fit any more in after all that breakfast?”

She glanced down at her plate. “Oops.” She laughed.

“We can have a picnic next week if you like. Any other suggestions for today?”

The weather had been amazing. It was the height of the summer holidays and I’d been feeling a bit guilty that I hadn’t taken her away as we usually did. So I tried to make an effort on the weekends.

“How about fishing? We could go down to the river and have a paddle too,” I suggested.

“Nah.” Emily shook her head.

“Shopping?”

“Nah.” She laughed.

“You’re spoiled, miss.”

“I know.”

“Nah,” Hector mimicked, creating a whole new bout of giggles from Emily.

“There’s a summer fete at the pub. They’re having a bouncy castle and a bucking bronco. Hector’s working there but I’m going. I’ll be propping up the bar,” Steph said.

“I don’t know. I don’t like the thought of taking her to the pub.”

“Please, Mummy?”

“It’s a family day, and it’s mainly in the garden,” Steph continued. “There’ll be loads of kids there. Early on there will be anyway—it might get a bit messy afterwards.”

“I don’t know. What do you think, Frank?”

“Oh, don’t involve me, lass. I’m looking forward to a day in front of the box. Back-to-back football for me.”

“Please, Mummy?”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Yes!” Emily punched the air.

“Right you. If you’ve finished eating I want your bedroom tidied, or we won’t be going anywhere.”

“Okay, then can we go?”

“We’ll see. Now scoot.” I began clearing the table.

Alex handed me his plate. “Thanks, Vic. That was lovely. I’d best be off, my buddies will be here soon. Have a nice weekend.”

“Are you back tonight, Alex?”

“No, tomorrow night. We’re going clubbing tonight and staying with a friend of a friend.”

“Oh, to be young and carefree,” Frank said, folding his newspaper.

Emily got to the door and stopped. “Hekker?”

Hector stopped his conversation with Steph and said, “Eh?”

“Hegs!” she said, and giggling, ran up the stairs.

“So, we may see you later?” Steph said.

“If we do come, it’ll be early and then we’ll go on somewhere else. I don’t want Emily around a load of drunks.”

“Fair enough. See you there, if you make it.” She left with Hector in tow.

“Okay, Frank. Are you going to be okay alone?”

“Are you kidding? I’m looking forward to the peace and quiet.”

“I’ll have my phone if you need me for anything.”

“I won’t. But thanks.”

I went upstairs to check on Emily and helped her finish the last of the tidying. “I’ll make a deal with you.” I said. “We’ll go to the pub and have an hour there, and then we’ll go on to somewhere else. Is there anything else you fancy doing?”

“Dunno.” She shrugged.

 

***

 

I had to park ten minutes down the road and walk back. From the door the inside of the pub looked like wall-to-wall people.  

I really didn’t want to go in.

This had been the first crowded place I’d been to since Jonathan’s funeral, and I seemed to be having some kind of panic attack. My legs were shaking and I wiped my sweaty hands on my jeans. I had to concentrate on my breathing, and it took several deep breaths to get my lungs working properly.

I gripped Emily’s hand, and bent to talk to her over the loud hum pulsing through the door.

“It’s busy, Em. Maybe we should come back later?”

“Aw. I just saw Kaylie. Can we go in, please?”

As we reached the door my head started swimming. I had to steady myself on the doorjamb before entering.

The small pub was filled with kids. The back doors and windows were opened up, showing the beer garden was also chock-a-block with families.

We passed the bar and noticed Hector busily loading the dishwasher.

“Hector, hi,” I called. Emily waved frantically.

“Khello.” Hector’s face lit up and he waved as though he hadn’t seen us in weeks. Then pointed to Steph, who was propping up the bar, as she told us she would be.

“Vic, come over here,” she called.

I shook my head and pointed to the beer garden and then to Emily.

She nodded and hopped off her stool and joined us. “Mayhem, isn’t it?” she shouted.

I nodded, needing to get outside to stop the panic rising in my chest. We shoved our way through the crowds.

Emily soon met up with several of her friends and they were having a wild old time on the bouncy castle.

Stephanie and I watched them for a while but then the bucking bronco soon distracted us, and we laughed hysterically at some of the sights we saw.

One guy confidently climbed on, dressed to kill in his skintight black jeans and fitted shirt. Gelled-back hair and cool dude shades told us he imagined himself God’s gift to women.

He started out well, but the operator must have had a mean streak as one minute he was giving a good old show, and the next he’d been unceremoniously splattered onto the mat. His glasses were skew-whiff on his face. He jumped up too quickly to look cool and vanished into the toilet.

Next, a large girl sat astride the mechanical bull who had the crowd in hysterics before it got started. She wore a denim miniskirt and a short gypsy-style top, both at least two sizes too small. When she tipped forward, her bottom raised in the air, giving all and sundry a look at tomorrow’s laundry. She landed moments later, flat on her back, legs akimbo, in a very unflattering position.

“Why would anybody do this?” I laughed.

Steph shook her head. “I have no idea.”

It amazed me that the queue of people prepared to make fools of themselves hadn’t diminished at all. In fact, it kept getting longer.

“Can I have a drink, Mummy?” Emily had come up behind us, her little face bright red from chasing her friends around the bouncy castle.

“Course you can, baby. Hold on.”

“I’ll come too,” Steph said.

“You stay here with Kaylie’s mum till I come back.”

I followed Steph to the bar. We waited for at least ten minutes before we were served. I ordered two glasses of orange juice and a vodka and coke for Steph.”

Two men sidled up to us. One was a short and dumpy, square-shaped bloke, the other lanky and thin. “Can we get you pretty ladies a drink?” the taller of the two asked, winking at me.

“No thanks,” I smiled lifting my glass up.

“Vodka and Coke, please.”

“Steph!” I said, eyeballing her.

“What? There’s no harm in buying me a drink.”

“Oh well, see you outside.” I made my way back to the beer garden.

Emily was sitting next to Kaylie’s mum and looked a little peaky. “Here you go, baby. Are you not feeling well?”

She shook her head, sipped at the juice and handed it back to me.

“Is she okay?” Kaylie’s mum asked. “I’d heard she wasn’t’ well, but she seemed fine running around earlier.”

“She has been fine, but she must have overdone it.” I smiled.

Emily leaned her head onto her arms.

“I’d better get her home.” I placed the glasses down on the table and lifted Emily into my arms. As I fought my way through the bar, I noticed Stephanie still engrossed in conversation with the two guys.

I hiked back to the car, Emily a dead weight in my arms, and my legs threatened to collapse.  My body shook with the sheer effort, and a strange twinge pulled in my lower stomach. Probably just a stitch, but I didn’t want to push it.

“Shall we get you home, my baby?”

Emily nodded. “I think I’m not better anymore.”

My stomach hit the floor. “You’ve just tired yourself out that’s all. You’ll see.”

 

***

 

As I carried her in to the house, Frank met us in the hallway. “I didn’t expect you back this soon,” he said, his head cocked to one side.

“Emily’s not feeling too well,” I said. Our eyes held, and I shook my head, before carrying her up to her room.

I began reading her a story but she fell asleep before I finished the first page.

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