Read Angels of Humility: A Novel Online
Authors: Jackie Macgirvin
Tags: #Christian Books & Bibles, #Literature & Fiction, #United States, #Religion & Spirituality, #Fiction, #Christianity, #Christian Fiction
“Contrary to popular and false belief, it’s not ‘those who help themselves’ whom God helps; it’s those who humble themselves. This is the promise of humility. God is personally and providenally supportive of the humble. And the grace He extends to the humble is indescribably rich.”
C.J. Mahaney
1“You will choose between two teachers in life: Wisdom or consequences.”
Wayne Cordeiro
2
Pastor Paul had been shaken to his core by the word Sarah gave him. How could she know he’d had an abusive father? He hadn’t even told Kathy. His father had died when he was a freshman in college, and he hadn’t met Kathy until the following year. He’d been careful to always talk about his dad’s good side and then change the subject. He sure wasn’t going to tell Kathy what Sarah had said.
Deception immediately appeared and perched on his shoulder.
“Leave the church? Why should you leave the church? The Lord is obviously blessing everything. Every time you turn around, new members are joining.”
It was like a dream come true for any pastor, but especially one so fresh out of seminary and still wet behind the ears.
“Paul, use your discernment,” pleaded Saldu. At the word
discernment
, Deception let out a squeal, as if impaled.
“How,” continued Saldu, “could Sarah know about your dad being abusive? She could only know that if the Lord told her. And if she heard it from the Lord, then that gives credibility to the other part of the message about taking the jail’s director up on his job offer. You need to set aside your own earthly gratification, which, trust me on this, in eternity will only shame you, and love the Lord enough to be obedient to His plans for you. You felt the Lord drawing you to the land. That’s good, but you didn’t pray to find out why. When the opportunity to thwart the jail came, you inserted your own desires and called it God’s plan. You misinterpreted His will. People conceive of plans and label them as being directly from God all the time. Then when their plan fails, they’re mad at God and at everyone else for letting them down.”
“But,” screeched Deception, “that part-time job would eventually lead to you leaving your church. You don’t want that. Most pastors never experience the type of success you’re seeing now, and this is your first church. You’d be a fool to leave.”
Saldu stood with his arms folded across his chest and a somber look on his radiant face. He was steadfast in obedience to the Lord and knew that this was also what Paul needed. His voice was stern. He pointed his unseen sword at Paul’s heart. “Paul, you need to follow the Lord’s plan for your life, not your plan. This is not a game. There are eternal consequences at stake. There’s a way that seems right to a man, but the end is death.
3
Do you understand? Disobedience leads to death.”
Paul wrestled with the situation, flipping back and forth between Sarah hearing from the Lord or possibly knowing the information some other way. He finally dismissed it. The prospect that it was true was entirely too scary to entertain. What if the Lord really spoke to Sarah and she wasn’t nuts? Then he’d be the one on the outside looking in.
No, it absolutely couldn’t be
. He didn’t know where Sarah got her information; maybe it was just a good guess. But he wasn’t going to become a chaplain at
that
jail, especially if it meant ministering with Sarah. Deception rubbed up against Paul’s face like an affectionate cat then turned and sunk his jagged talons into Paul’s skull.
Saldu sighed, sheathed his sword, and interceded for Paul.
Barbara gave Sarah a book on healing. Sarah devoured it. She’d heard people at prayer meetings praying for God to heal, but she never knew the outcomes. Now she delved into the topic. Hope rose in her spirit, and she posted verses around the house. “He personally carried away my sins in His own body on the cross, so I can be dead to sin and live for what is right. I have been healed by His wounds,”
4
she would say over and over. She had already figured out that when she got healed she would donate her cane and walker to the Bradbury Manor. Every night before she went to bed she expected to wake up in the morning with full mobility, and every morning so far, she was disappointed.
The idea of being healed and the revelation that George had accepted the Lord elevated Sarah’s spirits, even though her body continued to be uncooperative. She was only going to the jail twice a week now. It was just too laborious to make the trip. On the days that she couldn’t go, she prayed for all the inmates and looked forward to the next trip.
The next day, armed with her cookies and her walker, Sarah went out visiting prisoners. When the most responsive inmates heard her walker squeaking from around the corner, they began crying out, “Momma Sarah, Momma Sarah. Did you bring me cookies?” It always lifted her spirit no matter how tired her body was from the increased effort it took to get there.
As she made her cookie rounds this day, one of the inmates, an older prisoner nicknamed Skinner, wanted to speak to her. He let down his macho demeanor and confided that he was having recurrent nightmares that terrified him. “I even stayed awake last night ‘cause I couldn’t face ‘em again. When I sleep, this black, snake-like, evil thing comes to me and flashes all the bad stuff I ever done in front of me, startin’ when I was a little kid. It’s like a movie. It goes really fast in front of my eyes. While it’s playing, this thing is laughin’ this sick laugh. When it’s done it makes fun of me by sayin’ stuff like, ‘See all the evil in your life? You belong to me. I’m waitin’ for you. You can’t escape. Why don’t you kill yourself and we’ll go easy on you?’ Then I wake up and I’m sweatin’ and my heart is poundin’. I need help, bad.”
Sarah knew it was demonic and that the first step was salvation. “You might not believe this, Skinner, but I think you have a demon that torments you. And that demon is right about one thing. At this point the devil owns
your soul for eternity because of all the bad things you’ve done.” Skinner dropped his eyes in shame. “But the great news is that God loves you so much that He provided a way to save you from the enemy.” Joel and Malta watched Sarah, both of them beaming like proud parents. “You see, the Bible says that all have sinned and fallen short of God’s requirements.
5
We all belonged to Satan’s kingdom. But God sent Jesus to pay for our sins. If we believe that He died for us, our sins are all forgiven. Then He even gives us His goodness as a gift. When we die and we stand before God, our sin is forgiven and all He sees is righteousness, so He lets us into Heaven. It’s like God looks at us through “Jesus-colored glasses” from here on out. And it’s all a gift; you can’t earn it, and you can’t undo it. Have you heard the verse John 3:16?”
“Yeah, everyone knows that. Learned it as a kid.”
“Can you say it?”
“Sure.
‘For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son that whosoever believes on Him will not perish but have everlasting life.’
Hey, that’s exactly what you just told me.”
“Right. Would you like to pray now to accept Jesus?” Sarah was trying not to let her voice quaver, but she was gripped with equal parts of anticipation that Skinner would say yes and apprehension that he would say no. After a moment’s hesitation, he nodded yes.
Sarah realized she’d been holding her breath and slowly exhaled. “OK, repeat after me. ‘Dear Jesus, thank You for dying on the cross for my sins. I ask You to come into my heart and be my savior and forgive me of my sins. I give my life to you to do with what You will. Amen.’”
Skinner finished praying, and Sarah was the one crying. “Now Skinner, God isn’t keeping track of your wrongs any more. He’s keeping track of Jesus’ rights. Do you understand?” Skinner nodded his head.
“Cast out the spirit, Sarah,” said Malta. “Your faith cripples the enemy’s power.” A spirit of Boldness, which she had never felt before, came over Sarah. “By the power of the blood of Jesus, I command you evil spirit to leave, now.”
Joel and Malta watched as a large warrior angel appeared behind Skinner. Stunned by Sarah’s prayers, the demon Suicide that was coiled around Skinner’s torso and neck, fell to the floor. The angel brought his sandaled foot down on the serpent’s throat, pulled a silver knife from his sheath and sliced off its head. It howled mournfully and disappeared, leaving a black puff of putrid smoke.
The three angels rejoiced together. “Remember the first time we saw Sarah?” asked Joel. That same foul spirit was about to take her life. She was totally in its clutches. Now she’s in authority over it. She sent it fleeing!”
“Hallelujah,” shouted Malta.
“Now I don’t think you’ll have problems anymore with that dream, Skinner,” said Sarah. “But if you do, you just tell your little tormentor that those are no longer
your
sins. God is not holding them against you.
6
They’ve all been forgiven, and you are owned by no one but Jesus,” said Sarah as she leaned forward to give Skinner a big hug through the bars. “You may be incarcerated, but for the first time in your life, you are truly free.”
Skinner’s angel began to sing a hymn he had heard as a youngster in church. Without even realizing it, Skinner hummed along.
Sarah left the jail that day feeling great. It was the first time that she’d ever led someone to the Lord. She and her angels sang and praised all the way home, allowing her to temporarily forget her physical infirmities.
Later that night while she was sitting on the couch, Malta played the flute and led Sarah into a time of intercession for the inmates and Pastor Paul.
Oh God I’m so grieved that there’s no chaplain at the jail to disciple the inmates, no one to hold services or a Bible study. How will they grow and mature? Lord, please touch Pastor Paul’s heart. Have mercy on him in his disobedience. Please don’t hold his sin against him, but put his feet on the right path. Lord, deal with whatever attitudes prevent him from doing Your will. How will Will get saved if Pastor Paul’s not there ministering? Lord, unless You heal me, I won’t be able to go there much longer
. She travailed in prayer for an hour and a half. She was too drained to make the slow journey to her bed so she spent the night curled under the alpaca blanket on the couch.
The ringing phone woke her the next morning. Her back was stiff from sleeping on the couch, which slowed her movement even more. She picked up the phone on what was going to be the last ring. It was Barbara’s cheery voice on the other end. “How are you doing today?”
The Lord had spoken to Barbara, telling her to help Sarah more. Barbara was glad to oblige. She could feel the Lord’s pleasure over these acts of kindness.
The Lord is jealous for the well-being of the widows and orphans,
7
Barbara thought. She enjoyed tending her garden and her flowers, but there was never anything pressing on her schedule. Barbara’s time was totally her own, and she was happy to lavish it on Sarah.
Later in the week Barbara drove Sarah to the neurologist in Mt. Pielor. After the exam Dr. Schumacher floored Sarah by suggesting it might be time to think of leaving her home. “We don’t want you to fall and hurt yourself. It’s not good for you to live alone. Have you considered the Manor?”
When the conversation ended, Sarah was staying in her home by herself, but would compromise. She agreed to wear a special necklace; if she needed assistance she would merely press the button on the necklace to summon immediate help. At the end of the visit, Dr. Schumacher looked sternly at Barbara, “Sometime in the next few weeks, I want you to take her by the Manor just to look around. Do you understand”? Barbara nodded.
The ride home was somber. “Why isn’t the Lord healing me?”
“I don’t know. I just know that He has His own perfect timing. Don’t give up and lose faith. Remember, faith precedes everything God does for us. Without faith it’s impossible to please Him. And you must believe that He rewards those who diligently seek Him.”
8
“I was sure I’d be healed by now. The book I read says it’s God’s will to heal everyone—that’s in the Bible. He healed them all.”
9
After a long pause, Barbara said sadly, “I don’t have any easy answers, but I promise to keep praying for the Lord to touch you.”
I must not have enough faith
, Sarah thought.
How do I increase my faith?
She remembered the Bible says that faith comes from what is heard through God’s Word.
10
Maybe I’ll read my Bible more and increase my faith that way
.
Sarah was a woman with a mission, spending all her spare time in the Word. However, her health didn’t improve.
What can I do to show the Lord that I have faith? I just need a mustard seed’s worth
. Sarah decided that she would stop taking her medicine.
That will prove that I have faith. If I didn’t believe I would be healed, I certainly wouldn’t do that
. She skipped her bedtime dose of her Parkinson’s medicines. In the middle of the night, she woke up and tried to turn over in bed. She couldn’t roll over! A wave of panic and adrenalin swept through her as she struggled.
It feels like my legs are made of cement!
She didn’t know what to do except pray. After praying for 30 minutes with no results, she reluctantly admitted she needed help. She was too embarrassed to press the button on her necklace. They would send the police or firemen or an ambulance, and the sirens would wake up the whole neighborhood.
They’d probably cart me off to the hospital and tell me to go to the nursing home
. She finally decided that she would call Barbara. She reached for the nightstand. It was 3:30
a.m
. when Barbara groped for her phone.