“And what made you think of coming here?” Kitten asked as her curiosity momentarily got the better of her bad mood.
“Kara thought of it,” Ron admitted. “It seems she's smarter than both of us.”
Kara suddenly realized how they must look to Kitten, standing over top of her as they questioned her. She carefully stepped around Ron's sister so that she stood on the other side of her from Ron, and then sat down in the snow.
It was cold—even with the coat beneath her it was very cold.
She wondered how long Kitten had been sitting here like this.
“Let's get out of here,” Ron said. “We can go back to—”
“Sit down, Ron!” Kara told him.
“But it's—”
“Sit down!” she said again.
Ron did as she ordered.
Kara put a hand on Kitten's shoulder. For the first time she noticed that Kitten was holding a nearly empty bottle of scotch in her gloved hand. “Are you okay, Kitten?” she asked. “Christmas can be a really tough time of the year. What can we do to make this one better for you?”
Kitten turned to look at Kara. It was too dark for Kara to make out any real details of her face, but she met Ron's sister's gaze and stared into her eyes. The seconds stretched out between them until finally Kitten turned away. Her gloved hand—the one not holding the bottle of alcohol—began to play with the snow on her coat, brushing at it with increasing energy as if cleaning that piece of nylon was an incredibly important activity.
“Anne met her real family today,” she whispered.
Ron started to talk. “You're—”
“Be quiet, Ron!” Kara told him.
Blessedly, Ron listened to her.
Kitten glanced from Ron, to Kara and then back down at the patch of her coat she'd been cleaning. It was mostly covered in snow again after just those few seconds and she began to worry at it with her gloved hand again, striving to wipe it clean.
“Anne met her real family today, and they liked her.”
Ron took a breath again as if he needed to say something and Kara stared daggers at him over Kitten's head.
He didn't speak.
Kitten didn't notice Kara glaring at him.
“Now she's got two families who love her,” Ron's sister whispered.
She made a little sound then—something between a snuffle and a sob—and Kara tightened her grip on Kitten's shoulder to encourage her to keep talking.
“Anne gets everything,” Kitten told her.
Ron just couldn't keep his mouth closed. “You're going to find your biological parents too,” he predicted. “And they're going to love you just as much as Anne's love her.”
“No, they aren't,” Kitten insisted. “They've already rejected me again.”
“What?” Ron asked. “That doesn't—”
“Ron, shut up!” Kara hissed.
What was wrong with him?
Kitten didn't seem to notice. To get her talking again, Kara said. “Maybe they just haven't joined the registry yet,” she suggested.
Kitten shook her head. “That's not the way it works in Michigan anymore. In the old days, both the adopted child and the parent who gave them away had to join a registry if they wanted to find each other again and if there was a match, they were given contact information. But now, if the adopted child wants to find her parents, the state will track them down and contact them for them. I heard back a week before Anne. My mother doesn't want to see me. She said
no
.”
“Oh, Kitten,” Kara said. She impulsively hugged her and found Ron doing exactly the same thing. “I am so sorry!”
Kitten started crying, big wrenching sobs that shook both Kara and Ron as they held on to her.
“So Mom and Dad don't want me, my first parents don't want me, and Eric doesn't want me anymore either. When the twins go off to college this year, I'll be all alone again!”
“Oh, Kitten,” Kara whispered. She'd never felt particularly close to Ron's sister, or even comfortable with her, but her heart broke for the woman as she sobbed out her woes in the snow. “I don't know about your biological parents, but Howard and Hanna will always love you and Eric seems to adore you.”
“We never have sex anymore,” Kitten cried, giving entirely too much information about her private life for Kara's comfort. “You and Ron are making it like rabbits and my husband wouldn't touch me with a ten foot pole.”
“But you—” Kara began.
“I'm too fat!” Kitten interrupted.
“He said that?” Ron snapped. Righteous anger for his sister filled his voice and Kara remembered him darting forward at Ruth's house to throw open the front door and confront Bobby.
“He didn't have too,” Kitten cried. “I know what I look like.”
“But...” Ron's voice trailed off and Kara could guess what was troubling him. She'd seen the pictures of the kids in Howard and Hanna's house. Kitten's weight issues were nothing new. And Eric wasn't skinny either. But how could he diplomatically point that out.
“You know, Kitten,” she said. “Bedroom problems aren't uncommon in a lot of marriages. And the problem isn't always what you think it is. Have you talked about any of this with Eric?”
“I don't have to,” Kitten said. “He doesn't want any more kids.”
“Any more...” Kara let her voice trail off as she wondered where that statement had come from.
“So Anne gets everything again,” Kitten said. “She's got Mom and Dad, her new Mom, three great children who aren't about to leave home and—”
“You want more kids?” Ron asked.
“What?” Kitten asked. She sniffled and rubbed her nose against the snowy sleeve of her coat. “No! I mean, I don't know. Eric used to say that kids are expensive. And how could we afford them?”
“But you want some,” Ron repeated. It wasn't a question this time.
“I'm too old,” Kitten said, “and Eric doesn't want me anymore.”
“Kara's older than you are,” Ron said, “and I'm going to have kids with her.”
Kara's eyes widened and she wondered how it was that Ron had developed the habit of sharing important decisions like that with his family before he discussed them with her.
“You are?” Kitten asked him.
“Sure!” Ron said. “We've just got to make sure she can handle living with me first. What are you now, thirty-five? That's not too old to have children.”
Kara wanted to get up and go put her arms around Ron. They'd fought hard yesterday and this morning and she'd just realized it didn't mean anything to him. He still wanted to spend his life with her. He was actively planning their future. And he realized how difficult he made things for her. She wanted to get up and hug him, but she didn't move. She kept her hand on Kitten's shoulder and tried to offer the distraught woman her support.
“And I'll bet Eric isn't the problem you think he is. I don't think there's a delicate way to put this, so I'm not going to even try. You've always been heavy, Kitten, even back in high school when Eric and you first started dating. I don't know why the two of you stopped having sex, but I'll bet you it has nothing to do with weight.”
“But, but, but I want a family!” Kitten wailed. The last words came out as a scream against the snowy night.
Ron hugged her again. “You do have a family, Sis,” he whispered. “I'm your family, and so is Kara, and Mom and Dad and Anne and her brood. And you've got another family, too. You've got Eric, Marcie and Brett as well. We all love you! Who cares about some bitch who gave you up when you were a child? Her loss is everyone else's gain. You wouldn't have Marcie and Brett if she'd kept you and Anne and I wouldn't be who we grew up to be either.”
Kitten tried to explain. “I just, it just drives me crazy wanting to know. Who am I? Where do I come from? I don't understand why this isn't bothering you, too. You're not Dad's child! Mom knows who your real dad is and she won't tell you!”
“I haven't asked her,” Ron reminded her.
“I know!” Kitten shouted. “It's driving me crazy! Why don't you want to know?”
“Because I've already got a great family!” he said. Then he reached out past Kitten to grasp Kara by the arm. “And one of these days we're going to make it larger in the second best way possible.”
Kitten looked up, pulling out of her own misery for the first time since Kara and Ron had climbed up on the hill beside her and really trying to understand what Ron was talking about. “Second best way?” she asked.
“The best way,” Ron said, “will be after we get married when Kara and I make those babies we were just talking about and start a new family all our own.”
Kara's heart melted.
Kitten's face scrunched up and she began to cry again. “They just grow up and leave you!” she warned.
Nothing Kitten could say could spoil Kara's mood right now. “And then they fall in love, and get married, and give you grandchildren,” she told Kitten. She knew she was smiling like an idiot and she didn't care at all. Ron wanted to marry her! Ron wanted to have
babies
with her! He was looking ahead to the time they would make their own family. He really didn't care about their arguments.
“I want,” Kitten started, then snuffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve again. “I want more babies
now!"
“Then why don't you go home tonight,” Kara suggested, “and tell Eric you've thought of the present you really want for Christmas this year.”
Kitten looked at her as if she thought Kara had gone crazy. “But he—”
Kara touched her gloved fingertips to Kitten's mouth. “He can't say
yes
if you don't ask,” she told Kitten.
She got to her feet and with Ron's help, pulled Kitten to hers. “Let's get you out of the cold,” she said.
“But what if he doesn't want—”
Kara touched Kitten's mouth again. “Hush,” she whispered. “Stop worrying so much and give Eric a chance.”
Kitten stopped talking and let Kara and Ron lead her down the hill to the cars.
Chapter Twenty Two
“Do you think Kitten will be all right?” Kara asked Ron as she slipped out of her winter coat and draped it over a kitchen chair to dry.
Ron pulled his own coat off. “Not if she doesn't get some help,” he said. “What you said to her up on that hill was beautiful, and it convinced her to go home. But without some psychotherapy, a baby is not going to solve Kitten's problems.”
Kara pulled her scarf off and draped it over her coat. Her hair was wet with melting snow, but there wasn't a lot she could do about that now. “That's what I think, too,” she said. “It's so sad. I wonder how she got so messed up.”
Ron shrugged. “It's got to be more than my parents’ problems. Anne had to deal with those, too, and she's pretty normal.”
“I guess,” Kara agreed. She wasn't actually certain that Kitten wasn't the more typical of Ron's sisters. There were an awful lot of messed up people in the world.
She shivered from the wet and the cold. Ron crossed the space between them and took her in his arms. “We still haven't enjoyed our Christmas together,” he said. “What do you want to do? I could start a fire in the hearth while you warm up in the shower, then we could snuggle downstairs and open our presents.”
“Oh, yes,” Kara teased. “I've heard that one before. I'm sure you'll be patiently waiting for me down here while I get naked beneath the spray.”
Ron frowned. “I get it, Kara,” he said. “You think I want too much sex from you and you want me to back off. It's not what I want, but if you think it will make you happy, then I'll agree.”
Kara felt the smile slip away from her lips. “I'm sorry if I hurt you yesterday,” she said. “I don't want you to want me any less...” She wanted to say something more, but expressing these sorts of feeling had always been hard for her. How do you tell your boyfriend that you really like it when he fucks you hard before you go visit his parents, but you're still embarrassed if anyone figures out why you were late? “It's just that I...”
Ron dipped his head and kissed her. His lips had warmed up in the car, but a few beads of melted snow broke free from his hair and slid a cold track down into Kara's bosom.
She shivered but didn't pull away from him.
Ron broke the kiss. “I like it that I can still make you shiver,” he whispered. “I don't want us to become like Kitten and Eric—never having sex and not even sure if the other wants us anymore.”
Kara slid her own arms around Ron's back and pressed her face against his hard chest. “I'll always want you, Ron,” she whispered.
“You'd better!” Ron warned her. “Or I may just have to find new and innovative ways to recapture your interest.”
“I think I might like that,” she said. “Should I pretend apathy to see what you come up with?”
Ron slowly shook his head. “Pretending not to want me will get you punished.”
“Promises, promises,” Kara laughed. She didn't feel quite as cold as she had a few minutes ago. She liked bantering with Ron again.
“So should we take that shower together?” Ron asked.
“I think it can wait until later,” Kara told him. “Why don't you start that fire so we can snuggle in front of it and open our presents?” Then, not wanting him to mistake her plan for another rejection, she added, “And while you do that, I'll go slip out of this dress and into something more comfortable.”
Ron clearly liked that idea. He bent down over her and kissed her mouth, her chin, the line of her jaw, and the nape of her neck beneath her hair. His hands began to explore the back of her dress, searching for the zipper that kept it up around her.
She caught his arms in hers and pulled his hands away. “Make the fire,” she whispered. “I'll be right down.”
Chapter Twenty Three
Kara changed her mind about the shower when she smelled herself as she took off her dress. It appeared that playing basketball in her winter coat and hiking up and down a large hill were not conducive to good body odor. So she slipped quickly into the shower, rinsed and soaped herself in record time and got out again before Ron could come upstairs and remind them both of the sorts of things they did last Christmas.
Wrapping herself in a towel, she touched up her makeup and applied the barest trace of perfume to her throat and cleavage. Then she slipped into a beautiful black nightgown she'd bought earlier this month. She had other colors that her seasonal instincts would prefer on Christmas, but Ron always seemed to prefer the black ones so she put it on for him. Her black silk robe was not the warmest garment she had, but it accentuated her curves and, well, Ron would keep her warm tonight.