Anywhere (11 page)

I wanted to believe him. I needed to believe him. And good god, I was suddenly desperate for him to kiss me. I was so afraid of everything in that moment—my present, my future, whether I was on the verge of making a monumental mistake with Asher—but I didn’t care. I think a part of me wanted to prove my mother wrong—the other part just wanted Asher. Even if only for the night.

So I leaned in toward him, all awkwardness gone.

He ran a hand over my bare leg and I shivered at the sensation. I leaned closer, brushed my lips over his, lightly at first and then more intensely as I opened my lips to taste him. He deepened the kiss so gently, so sweetly, and it sent my heart hammering, my body humming. I rolled on top and straddled him, teasing his tongue with my own, tangling my hands in his soft hair.

He broke the kiss, cupped my face, searched my eyes. “Do you?”

Did I want to be with him? My body was giving a resounding
Yes
. I nodded, breathless at the thought.

“We don’t have to, Skye. We can take it slow.”

“You don’t want to?” Oh god, I’d just made a complete fool of myself. I started to turn away, to hide my face, but Asher stopped me, pressed his pelvis up against me and I gasped when his very obvious want pressed hard against my panties. I tried not to smile at that, but I couldn’t stop it. I loved that I’d done that to him. “I want you,” I breathed, aching for his touch.

He didn’t hesitate, just brought his mouth to mine.

I opened my lips to welcome him again and his tongue tasted my lips as he moaned ever so softly. The sound reverberated in my body, making me tingle in places I’d never known I could.

I couldn’t get close enough to him. I pulled his shirt up to feel his skin. I suddenly had to feel him. All of him. He lifted his arms, his mouth still attached to mine, and I slid his t-shirt up and over his shoulders. He broke the kiss so I could pull it all the way off, then tossed it to the floor.

I ran my hands over his chest and stomach, watched as his muscles clenched when my hands went low. He was beautiful—a mixture of hard and soft, muscle and flesh. He watched me as I traced him with my fingers, breathing hard from my touch. He grabbed my hand and pressed it to his heart. I could feel it pounding, fast and hard, in his chest.

“This is you,” he said. “All you.” Then he reached for the bottom of my shirt, which had bunched up to my waist. He fingered the hem for a moment, then said, “You’re sure about this?”

“Are you?” The girl he used to love was waiting for him. I needed to know he was factoring that in.

He nodded, and I pulled my shirt up over my head and threw it over by his.

Asher’s eyes got wide, and his breath caught. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered, then he leaned forward and kissed me deeply, insistently. I smiled into his kiss, and he left my mouth to kiss up the side of my jaw and nip at my earlobe, sending little shock waves to my core. Then his mouth trailed down my neck to my collar bones. At the same time, he drew one hand along my side to my breasts, where he traced gentle circles on my skin.

My body was a symphony of sensations and I could barely breathe. I gasped as he lowered his head to my breast and flicked my nipple with his tongue. The nipple hardened, and when he did it again, the throb between my legs grew to an aching need.

Oh, I was completely sure I wanted to do this. I’d never been more sure in my life.

I’d also never been more sure, with a horrible sinking feeling, that I didn’t have any condoms.

“Asher,” I said. “Do you have protection? Because I don’t.”

He lifted his head to look at me, realization dawning on his face. He lay his forehead against my chest with a groan.

“I wasn’t exactly planning for this kind of thing,” he said into my rib cage. Then he inhaled deeply and pressed a kiss to my skin which gave me shivers again. “You smell so good,” he murmured.

“I wasn’t either,” I said. “Obviously.” I ran my hands through his hair—it was so soft and thick. “Fuuuuuuck.”

“Not tonight,” Asher said. “No glove, no love.” And that totally made me smile. He kissed me softly. Which only made it worse because I was getting all tingly again, and it was my turn to groan. He laughed and said, “Shopping trip tomorrow?”

“YES,” I said, and kissed him again. “This officially sucks, you know?”

“I don’t know,” he said wickedly. “I’ve got this whole gorgeous playground here to myself. I can think of ways to still have fun.” And then he crushed his mouth to mine, leaning forward so far I tipped backwards until I was laying down and he was above me. He pulled away from my mouth, grinned at my breathless expression, then slowly blazed a trail of kisses down my chest and stomach, turning me molten inside. He ran his tongue along the skin at the top of my panties and slipped his fingers under the band to tug them down enough to expose another inch.

He kissed his way down, inch by slow inch, until he was sliding my panties over my hips and all the way down my legs. My breath was ragged as he kissed his way up my inner thigh and paused, breathing right above my ache. The warmth of his breath made me gasp. He smiled and kissed his way up the inside of my other thigh, slowly, tauntingly, pausing again when he reached my core.

He was driving me insane. I was ready. I wanted him to take me in his mouth. I needed it like I needed air.

“Please,” I breathed. “Please, Asher.”

He smiled, and made this half growl low in his throat. “I’ve been imagining doing this,” he said, “ever since our first night in Venice.” He held my gaze as he lowered his mouth to take me in, his tongue flicking lightly. His mouth was warm and wet, and it didn’t take very long before he’d rocked me to heights I’d never reached before.

When I came down from the high, he was gazing at me in wonder. “You’re
so
beautiful, Skye. I could do that again and again just to watch you.”

I covered my face, but couldn’t hide my grin.

“What?” he said. “Don’t be embarrassed. It was incredibly sexy.
You
are incredibly sexy.”

The thing was, Blaine had tried to do that occasionally, but it had rarely worked, and when it did…well, it was nice (because an orgasm was
always
a good thing), but it wasn’t oh-my-god amazing like just now. I had honestly never felt anything like that. I mean, my toes were still tingling several minutes after the fact and I had yet to get the feeling completely back in my legs.

He slid up alongside me under the covers, and then smiled in surprise as I slipped out of his arms.

“You’re not the only one who gets to play,” I said, and watched as his muscles tightened when I slowly kissed my way down his chest to his stomach. He moaned deliciously as I teased him with my tongue, and flat-out gasped when I slid his boxers off and grazed him with my lips.

And when he came, his cries were so vulnerable that I wanted to wrap my arms around him and never let go. He whispered my name over and over again, his hands pulling me back up to him, his bare chest against mine, our skin touching from head to toe. He kissed me deeply, softly. Then I lay my head on his shoulder and breathed him in. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt this content, this whole.

This…at home.

fourteen

I
woke first the next morning, my face just inches from his. I lay there without moving and watched him sleep. I wasn’t trying to be a creeper—and, yes, it occurred to me that if he opened his eyes to me staring at him, that might come across as a little freaky—but I wanted to study him, see what he looked like when all of his defenses were down, when he was completely vulnerable.

He looked younger, the lines of his face softened. And the sadness he carried—even when he joked or laughed you could still see it—was gone. I liked him without the sadness, and then felt horrible for thinking that. He was entitled to it. It was a part of who he was. But I hated that he was in pain and there was nothing I could do to help.

I rolled away from him and stretched, realizing that I’d actually slept the entire night—something that hadn’t happened for months as my anxiety over the wedding had grown. And I hadn’t noticed that I’d still been sleeping like crap even after I’d left it all behind.

So I felt well rested for the first time in forever. With a tiny smile, I wondered if what he’d done to me last night had anything to do with it. Cure for insomnia! And I almost laughed out loud even as I was blushing furiously.

“You look happy this morning,” he said, and I jumped, not realizing he’d woken up. God, he’d seen me grinning about last night and probably knew exactly what I’d been thinking. Which only made me blush more.

“Come on,” he said, his dimples sinking deliciously into his cheeks as he grinned wickedly at me. “Let’s get breakfast before we go shopping.”

I watched him get out of bed and reach for his clothes. He caught me staring and his smile widened as I blushed even redder. But I couldn’t help looking—I was not about to miss an opportunity like this when he was all bare skin and beautiful. And he looked so, um, happy to see me in the morning. My eyes drifted to his erection, then up to his eyes, and I wouldn’t have been able to contain my smile if I’d tried.

I sat up, letting the sheet fall to my waist, watching feral hunger fill his eyes. If we didn’t both get dressed quickly, it was very likely I would take my chances without the condoms, and that was Not a Good Idea. Doing my best to ignore the feel of his gaze on my naked skin, I turned away and pulled on my clothes.

“I’m clean,” Asher said. I stopped, t-shirt only partway on, and stared at him. “I got tested a few months ago, just to be sure, but I’ve always used condoms. Every time.” He paused. “I just thought you should know.”

Wow. No talking around the subject for him. I was momentarily stunned—Blaine had never liked talking about it, and trying to get information out of him had been next to impossible. I’d finally demanded that he get tested
before
we did anything and show me the results.

“Yeah, no, that’s good,” I said, and then did a mental facepalm. “I mean, I am too. I haven’t been tested, but I’ve only been with one guy—Blaine, obviously—and we always used condoms.” I shook my head. “Not that he didn’t try to change that. But I’m impressed—you with the testing and condoms.”

“Well, my mom’s a nurse,” Asher said, “and when Josh and I were in middle school, she got out one of her medical textbooks and showed us pictures of what various venereal diseases look like.”

“NO—” I started laughing. “—WAY.”

“Photographs,” he said, laughing now, too. “Of REAL people.”

“Oh. My. God.”

“Probably the single most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen. Scared the shit out of me. I was afraid to even kiss a girl for the longest time.”

“Wow. That’s just…WOW.”

“I know. And then she made us look at them again once a year until I was a junior in college.”

“Your mom
loves
you.”

“Yeah,” he said, his laughter fading into a warm smile. “She really does.”

A little while later, as we sat at the café in the piazza, Alessandro stopped by to say hello. I sipped my cappuccino as he talked about the vineyards in Barolo and insisted on taking us on a tour. Like we could turn that down—yes, we had PLANS, but we were in Italy. We needed to immerse ourselves every opportunity we got. So half an hour later we were headed toward the medieval castle at the top of town. Alessandro told us it had been turned into a wine museum to celebrate the town’s revered red wine.

I tried to listen to Alessandro, I really did, but every time I looked at Asher, all I could think about was where his tongue had been and how much I was looking forward to tonight, so I spent the entire morning horny as hell.

Alessandro led us through rows upon rows of grape vines. The plants were bushy with leaves, but not grapes yet. I think he said it was too early in the season. It was gorgeous out on that hill—the sky was clear and we could see for miles. And it was vineyards everywhere for as far as I could see.

“Everything here is wine. All business is wine,” Alessandro said.

“It’s so beautiful,” I said. “Have you lived here all your life?”

“
Si
,” said Alessandro. “I grow up here. It’s the most beautiful place in the world. I never leave.”

“I can understand that,” Asher said, but he was looking at me when he spoke and he squeezed my hand. My heart did a little flip and my mind went right back to last night and the purchase we planned to make today.

We asked Alessandro where the pharmacy was.

“You sick?” he said. “You need doctor?”

“No,” I said, heat flooding my face as I tried to think of some non-condom related reason we’d need to go to the pharmacy. But my mind was too busy being mortified that this sweet little old man might guess our true purpose.

“We just need to pick up things for our first aid kit,” Asher said. “You know, like bandages and aspirin.” Thank god one of us was good on their feet. And as soon as I thought that, all I could wonder was whether Asher
was
good on his feet. Visions of showering with him filled my head and my whole body started tingling as I tried to bring my focus back to what Alessandro was saying. Again.