Arbiter (The Arbiter Chronicles Book 1) (22 page)

Rae took a deep breath, then glanced up at the teenager that stood on the other side of the wisp, her face lit by the small orb's ethereal glow.

Mika cautiously met Rae’s eyes. “So…um…wow…"

"Yeah…" said Rae, not knowing what else to say.

"Are you gonna talk to him?" asked Mika.

"Me? Why me?"

Mika shrugged. "You know him better. I'm still trying to get used to this world, but you've known Cathel since the start. Besides, I think he'd want to talk to you more than me."

"What makes you say that?" asked Rae.

Mika shrugged again. "Just a hunch.” She turned towards Larin. “C’mon, Larin. Show me the way to bed!"

To Rae's surprise—and slight chagrin—the wisp obeyed, beginning to slowly bob down the hallway back towards the dining hall. Rae followed along behind it, Mika walking beside her. The younger girl had her eyes fixed on the wisp, one of her hands hugging her arm. She was quiet. That in itself was such a rarity that it concerned Rae somewhat. In the past, she would have been glad of the silence, but after what they had just been through, it worried her.

She took a deep breath, clenching her fist slowly before turning to Mika.

"Are you…okay?" she asked.

"What?" asked Mika, blinking and looking up at her. Rae met Mika's eyes, holding the younger girl's gaze. Mika stared at Rae, then slowly averted her eyes. "Um…it's hard to say…"

"What you saw in the mirror…" began Rae.

Mika shook her head. "Don't," she said, cutting Rae off. She looked up at Rae, an apologetic expression on her face. "I...really don't want to talk about it, Rae. Let's just say I saw my brother die, again and again."

The look on Mika's face said that there was more to the story, but even that little tidbit was enough. Rae nodded, looking away from Mika and staring straight ahead of her. Mika averted her eyes, not looking at her, and Rae thought she had an idea of what was on Mika's mind.

Mika's brother was dying. And it was all her fault. Of course, Mika wouldn't want to talk to her right now.

"I'm going to bed," said Mika as they entered the dining hall. "…Mind if I borrow Larin for a bit? I don't want to grope around in the dark."

Rae shrugged. "Send him back when you're done," she said, looking around the dining room. It was well-lit enough that she could see her way, and the door to the entrance hall was still open, allowing her to guess which way Cathel had gone. Mika nodded once, motioning for Larin to lead her towards the door. The wisp followed, sensing Rae's approval, and continued to lead Mika away. The younger girl hesitated, turning to Rae.

"You should find him," she said. "Find him and talk to him."

Rae nodded. "I'm on it," she promised, glancing back at Mika to reassure her. Mika frowned, as if trying to gauge whether or not Rae was serious, before she nodded once, walking off down the hall. Rae waited until she had closed the door behind her, before heading to the open door on the other side of the dining hall.

She found Cathel in the entrance hall, seated on the staircase. He had his hands clasped together in front of him, his arms resting on his knees. His eyes were fixed on the large window that overlooked them, staring at the view of the forest outside. He didn't look up as she let the door close behind her with a click. She took a deep breath and gathered up her cloak in her arms, coming to sit next to him.

They sat there in silence, Cathel staring at the window and Rae staring at the velvet carpeting beneath her feet. The silence dragged on for what seemed like forever, before Rae cleared her throat.

"Elrithea says you can stay," she said. "She has a suite of rooms prepared for you, but she wants you to stay away from her for the next couple of days."

Cathel grunted noncommittally, staring out the window. Rae watched him for a few seconds, then quickly turned away. She clasped her hands together nervously, tangling her fingers together as she felt the tension in the air between them. It was funny how it had almost been easier to stand up to the dream version of her Reaper in the vision Elrithea had given her than it was to talk to Cathel now.

She took a deep breath, the fingers of one hand splaying out over her knee. "…Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.

"What's there to talk about?" asked Cathel, sighing. "I attacked the High Lord. You saw me do it."

Rae frowned at him. "I saw you do it. I want to know why you did it. This isn't like you, Cathel."

Cathel turned his head towards her, meeting her eyes. "…Do you know enough about me to know what's like me and what's not?"

At once, she was aware of the closeness of him, how the two of them were seated on the same step, so close that their legs brushed against each other. She was aware of how green his eyes were, aware of the questioning expression of his face. She was suddenly just so much more aware of him, and the knowledge caused an unfamiliar flutter in her stomach. She averted her eyes from his and the awareness stopped, and she was left with Cathel again and the knowledge that what he had done had hurt him as much as it had hurt Elrithea.

"I know enough about you to know that you're hurting…I don't think that's your usual state of mind."

Cathel stared at her, before sighing and shaking his head. He looked away from her, staring down at the ground below them, and once he averted his eyes, Rae took that as a sign that it was safe to look up. She did, just in time to see Cathel run his hand through his hair in frustration, taking a deep breath.

"No," he finally said. "You're right. It isn't." Cathel took another breath, clenching and unclenching his fists. Rae waited for him to speak, not prompting or prodding him, simply leaning against the step behind her and waiting. After a while, he clasped his hands together, speaking without looking at her.

"Do you remember what I told you about Series?" he asked. "That a mage is considered a master when he learns all the spells in a single Series?"

Rae nodded once. "I remember.”

"Do you know what a rare Series is?" he asked.

"Something like the Decadal Series?"

Cathel shook his head. "Not even close," he said. "Your Decadal Series is…well, it's something right out of legend. I didn't even know people could still learn the Decadal Series—the knowledge of the inner workings of the High Court, and the position of the Arbiter, aren't exactly common knowledge."

"…So what's a rare Series, then?" asked Rae.

"A rare Series is the colloquial term for a Tower-dependent Series. You can think of these Series as specialized. There are some common Series, like Varra's Alchemical Series, that can be learned at any Tower. The rare Series can only be learned at one particular Tower, and the Tower is different depending on the Series."

Something in Rae's mind clicked, and she looked up at Cathel. "So when you said you had moved from Carane Tower to Laria Tower, it was because of your Series?" she asked.

Cathel nodded. "When I discovered that my greatest aptitude was for the Edictal Series, I wanted to learn it at all costs. To that end, I traveled across the Safelands until I got to Laria Tower, where I studied under Master Alyan."

"How old were you?" asked Rae.

"…Eleven when I started to travel," said Cathel. "Twelve by the time I made it to Laria. The journey took me one year."

"And you made it at eleven?"

"It wasn't too hard. I stuck with trading companies that I knew specialized in magical goods. They're always willing to help a new apprentice get from Tower to Tower. There are many new mages who would willingly make the journey, just to study underneath one of the specialized masters. They don't take many students."

"But Alyan took you?"

"I was young. Young mages are easier to teach. Most people don't make recognized apprentice until fourteen, fifteen or sixteen, but then again, most people don't start learning magic until they're ten or eleven. I started when I was seven. Remember, I couldn't take being in my hometown anymore. On top of my age, I'd also built up a bit of a reputation for being a prodigy."

"I can see it…" said Rae, honestly. She thought about the Cathel she had seen against Skor, and the same Cathel she had seen against Elrithea.

Cathel waved a hand dismissively, shaking his head. "Please," he said. "Don't even start. I worked hard, and I had a little bit of brains to go along with it. I started young. None of those things make a prodigy. But regardless, Master Alyan took me in, and I studied the Edictal Series with him. It was around then that I met Varra. She was a new girl who had just come in, so they stuck us together most of the time."

"That's why she says you're yearmates," said Rae.

Cathel nodded. "Anyway, I studied under Alyan, and I learned a good bit of the Edictal Series from him. Over the years, I learned how to command stone and steel, earth and tree, wind and water. Everything behaves differently under commands, and I had to learn how to command each one. It was trying, but I learned at a fairly quick pace, and Alyan was able to teach me a good bit. By the time I was seventeen, I had learned all the spells for inanimate objects, the spell for plants, and the spell to bind an animal. Master Alyan told me I was ready to go for my mastership."

Cathel looked away. "…There was a lot of pressure to succeed," he said. "If I succeeded, I would be the youngest master mage in Laria Tower's history. Master Alyan wanted that recognition so badly. He put a lot of pressure on me, priming me for the day he would teach me the final spell. And then…"

Cathel trailed off, groping for words. Rae stared at him, realization slowly dawning on her as she remembered what he had just done. With that realization came a slow horror, and her eyes widened, her hand falling to her side.

"You're not saying…" she began.

"Mm," said Cathel, nodding once at Rae. "Ivali binding. The spell that binds a member of the Ivali as your servant, permanently." He sighed, staring down at his hands. "It is a crime punishable by death to use the Edictal Series against another human being. Master Alyan made sure to explain that to me when I was younger. He showed me court cases of mages being tried for misuse of their magic, explained to me that as a mage with the Edictal Series, I would naturally be under suspicion, no matter what I did. He made me swear on my life and on my honor that I would never use the Edictal Series against another human. But he wanted me to use it against one of the Ivali."

"I argued with him on that point," continued Cathel. "I told him that it was the same thing, that the Ivali were sentient beings with Sources of their own. I couldn't use my magic on them. It was wrong. It was evil. But he insisted, saying that this would be my final spell. And he brought out the Ivali he wanted me to bind."

Cathel looked Rae straight in the eye, and the look in his eyes, accompanied by the words that he spoke, made her blood run cold.

"…It was Ania."

It was the sun that eventually woke her, the bright light heating up the dark covers of her bed until it was almost impossible to stay asleep. Rae lay awake for a long time, staring at the ceiling above her. In the light, the castle no longer seemed quite so dark and foreboding, The rooms Elrithea had provided them with were luxurious, much grander than the simple forest glade that Alcian had invited them into. But if she was being honest, she would say that she liked Alcian's simple glade much better than this. They had been at peace back then.

She stared up at the ceiling, her mind going back to the conversation she had had with Cathel the night before and the look on his face as he sat beside her on the staircase.

"…
It was Ania…" he said.

Rae stared at him. Suddenly
, 
everything made sense. The words that Alcian had spoken to her back in the glade, the complete love and admiration that Ania had for Cathel, the way he and his master could speak to each other with that much hate—she was finally beginning to understand. She hesitated, her hand pausing halfway to moving up and landing on his arm. She slowly lowered her hand back to her knee, placing it firmly there.

"…
What happened then…?"

He sighed heavily. "…You know what happened," he said. "I refused. I saved Ania. She marked me 
tarethan
. Master Alyan never forgave me, and I never forgave him. Things got ugly. You came along. I got sent out to the Edgelands with you."

Her fingers curled tightly around the fabric of her pants. She knew where this was going next, and she didn't want to ask, didn't want to cause him any more pain. But there was a part of her that needed to know, needed to hear what Elrithea had put him through. She exhaled slowly.

"
So Elrithea…"

"…
She showed me what would have happened had I succeeded. Had I gotten my mastery. I was a spectator, powerless to stop myself. I had to watch as I bound Ania and destroyed her."

Rae clenched her fist. She could 
see 
the pain on Cathel's face, and she wanted to do something, to comfort him, to tell him it would be alright, to make it better somehow. She wanted to touch him, to show him that that was only a dream. But she couldn't do it. She didn't know how. So she did the only thing she knew how to do.

She sat there and stared at him in silence for a long moment.

"…
Cathel…" she began.

Cathel interrupted her, dragging his palms down his face as he sucked in a deep breath. "I attacked the High Lord," he said. "I wanted to hurt her. I wanted to bind her. Don't say that what I saw in the dream wasn't me, Rae. Because 
I 
did that to Elrithea. I would have done it…if you hadn't stopped me. Friend of the High Court…" He shook his head, staring down at his hands. "What a joke…"

Rae said nothing, looking away from him and staring down at her hands. She didn't know what she could possibly say. But in that moment, she wished that she did, wished that she knew how to make this better for him.

After a moment, Cathel sighed, getting to his feet. "…I'm going to bed," he said. "Good luck tomorrow, Rae. You'll need it."

Rae watched as he walked off, biting her lip. She hesitated, not entirely sure what to say. She stared as he walked, each step he took seeming to echo in the expansive chamber of Elrithea's entrance hall. Rae swallowed hard as she watched him walk away. He was just going to walk away. Because he hated himself. Because he blamed himself for this…

Because he blamed himself…

"…
It's not your fault."

The words surprised her, because she hadn't intended to say them. But Cathel stopped anyway, his fists clenched so tightly at his sides that she saw his knuckles turning white. Rae took a deep breath, the words bursting from her before she could stop them or think about what she was saying.

"…
Yes, you attacked Elrithea. Today. But that's not who you are. Elrithea shouldn't have made you see that. She shouldn't have taunted you. And there isn't 
anyone 
here who could honestly say that they don't act like a different person when they're angry."

Cathel hesitated, not turning around to face her. He took a deep breath "…You…don't really know who I am, do you?" he asked, before walking away. Rae sat there for a long while, staring at him, the memory of his angered expression and the look in his green eyes frozen in her mind.

#

Rae stared at the hand she had raised above her head, slowly clenching it into a fist. It was so stupid, because she knew. She'd wanted to tell him then that she knew who he was. He was the person who would defy centuries of tradition to do what was right. He was the person who could earn the trust of a Ivali child.

He was the person who could make Rae come out of her shell, who could make someone like Rae believe in him.

And right now…she was torn between telling him that or slapping him in the face repeatedly until he figured it out. Because she was also starting to learn that he could be deliberately obtuse, he could be incredibly self-assured (and somehow incredibly self-deprecating at the same time), and that he had a habit of taking responsibility for everything.

And she had never thought it was possible to admire someone so much and be so irritated with them at the same time.

She took a deep breath, lowering her hand. She couldn't stay in bed forever. At some point, she was going to need to get up and face Elrithea, and she knew she couldn't keep the High Lord waiting. Rae sat up, pushing the blanket off of herself and sliding out of bed.

She headed over to the bath attached to her bedroom, looking in the wardrobe for the traveling clothes that she had stashed there the night before. There, she paused, staring into the wooden drawer she had placed them in. The shirt, vest, cloak, and pants that Alcian had given Rae were there, but directly above them, there was a deep blue gown, silvery beads threaded into the fabric. She picked it up. The fabric was soft, and it seemed to slip through her fingers, leaving her no doubt as to who had left it there.

Elrithea.

Of course.

Not wanting to offend the High Lord, Rae reluctantly stripped and washed up, dressing in the gown she had been given. She had worn dresses before, but they had always been simple things—solid color affairs that she wore when she felt like wearing a skirt. The dress was far more elaborate than anything she had ever worn, but strangely, it wasn't entirely uncomfortable on her. She supposed that it had something to do with the fact that it was made by the Ivali. Like Alcian's cloak, the things that belonged to the High Lords of the Ivali almost seemed to work out differently than they should.

When she was finished dressing, she stepped outside her room, self-consciously smoothing down the fabric of the gown Elrithea had given her. She looked down the hallway as voices drifted up from Mika's set of rooms, one male and one female. Rae hesitated at the door, taking a deep breath before opening it. Cathel and Mika looked up as she entered, the two of them seated on the floor and seeming engrossed in a magic lesson.

Mika had been lent a gown as well, but it looked like the teenager had decided not to wear it—the deep green gown was draped over the back of a chair as if Mika had been in the process of considering it before deciding to drop it altogether. Cathel was still dressed in his normal traveling clothes. Rae frowned as she noticed this, wondering if Elrithea had simply neglected to give him something to wear.

"What?" he asked, looking over her dress. "You too?"

"What's wrong?" asked Rae, stepping forward as she let the door close behind her. "Jealous that you didn't get a dress to wear too?"

Cathel gave her a flat look. Rae glanced over at Mika. She was sure that a comment like that should have sent Mika into a roaring laugh, or at least a witty comment in return. Instead, the girl simply stared straight ahead of her, barely responding. She turned towards the girl.

"Mika, everything okay?"

"What?" asked Mika, shaking her head. "Everything's fine. Just…Elrithea wants to see you when you wake up. She says she'll talk to you over breakfast."

"Ah…got it," said Rae, looking from Mika to Cathel.

"You should go," said Cathel. "Don't keep the High Lord waiting."

"Yeah…" said Rae, nodding once. She took a deep breath, watching the two of them. "…You two will be alright here?"

"We'll be fine," said Cathel. "I've got a lot to go over with Mika."

Rae nodded, walking over to the door. She paused, resting her hand on the door knob. "Sword practice later?" she asked, looking back at him.

"If you change into something more practical," said Cathel with a small grin.

Now there was something more normal. Rae relaxed, but did her best to not let her relief show on her face. "Deal," she said, shaking her head as she opened the door and stepped through. She let the door close behind her in the hallway, sighing as she leaned against it.

…It would be just her luck that the moment she discovered she actually had people she cared about, none of them were speaking to each other. Still, she supposed she couldn't do anything about this now, and she didn't know what she would do if she could. The best she could do at this moment was to just leave them alone, and hope that they eventually recovered. It was what she would want if she were in their shoes. Space to recover.

She set off towards the dining room, prepared to meet with Elrithea.

Rae found the High Lord seated at a smaller table in the corner of the room, the large table from the night before having somehow disappeared. Elrithea looked up as Rae approached, her expression stern. "You are late, Arbiter. I was worried that you would not rise before noon."

She ignored the obvious barb. Rae had dealt with the Reaper long enough to know how to keep herself from rising to the bait, and she was beginning to understand that compared to the Reaper, Elrithea was a kitten. She was dangerous, yes, but only if she was allowed to get under one's skin.

"…Sorry," she said. "It's a habit from my realm."

"So I've heard," said Elrithea, a small smile on her face as she gestured to the seat in front of her. "Sit and eat. We have much to discuss."

Rae sat, looking down at the spread set between them. Unlike the feast of last night, this seemed like a relatively simple breakfast. She paused. She had been expecting something a little more ostentatious from Elrithea. The High Lord smiled indulgently at her, as if Rae was a child that had somehow found herself in Elrithea's presence.

"These offerings do not please you?”

"It's not that they don't please me," said Rae, picking up a piece of bread and spreading some jam on it. "…It just seems…?"

"…Out of place?" finished Elrithea.

Rae was about to agree, but she paused, thinking over the question further. Now that she thought about it, it wasn't so much that simplicity was out of place in Elrithea's palace as it was simply different. Elrithea wasn't ostentatious, exactly. She liked fine clothes and furniture, but nothing in her palace seemed gaudy or out of place. There were no paintings or tapestries, no portraits of the High Lord, just simple dark colors and straight lines.

Elrithea wore a gown, but it wasn't as showy as it could have been. In some ways, the High Lord almost seemed to display elegance in simplicity.

Elrithea smiled, noticing her hesitation, and smoothly changed the subject.

"I am pleased to see that you are wearing my gift. The color suits you."

"…Thanks," said Rae, taking a bite out of the piece of bread in her hands. She leaned forward, conscious about getting crumbs on the dress Elrithea had given her.

"You may keep it, of course, once you leave my castle. Although you may find little use for it on the road."

"I appreciate it.” She didn't honestly think that she would wear it again, but she still knew better than to insult the High Lord. She continued to eat in silence. Elrithea simply watched her, waiting until she finished. When she was done, the High Lord folded her hands neatly on the table, turning towards Rae.

"Now," she said. "We must speak of the Decadal Spell."

Rae nodded, her expression growing serious as she faced Elrithea. Alcian's Decadal Spell had been a part of herself. She had learned it by learning how to access Alcian's Source, but she hadn't spoken with Elrithea nearly long enough to have an idea how she was going to do that. As if sensing her contemplation, Elrithea simply smiled, waving her hand dismissively.

"Please, Arbiter, you mistake me for my sister again. My Source is not quite so closed off as to make it difficult for you to gain my spell. Indeed, learning my spell is the easy part. Mastering it…that is where we must spend our time."

"…Mastering it?"

She knew how to use Alcian's spell instinctively. That was the nature of Ivali magic. It didn't need to be taught. At least, that was how she understood it.

"Yes," said Elrithea. "Unlike my sister's spell, mine is a spell of the mind. Although you will learn it instantly, simply from absorbing my Source, it's quite likely that the influx of information you'd get from it would drive you mad, unless you knew how to control it first. It is for that reason that I drew you away from your friends today. I'd advise you to stay away from human contact, until you know how to control my spell fully."